Don't move your Thai wife to the West if you want to come back .

[sirineou]

5 hours ago, Roadman said:

All of the kiwi/Thai couples we know plus the few Thai couples here would never leave NZ for Thailand. But then they have all built new life’s here with children which is a huge corner stone anchor. Plus own their own businesses or work generally in higher earning contract jobs. 
Perhaps in your case it’s a matter of accepting that she is intelligent enough to figure out where she sees her best opportunity for her well being (and congratulate yourself yet again for the outstanding choice you made letting her pick you as a partner and why when push comes to shove she is more important then Thailand just for now) and work towards a compromise of living in both countries for different periods. She will also retire one day. 

Once children come into play, the whole game changes, If we had children, no way would I pull them out of the US and move them to Thailand. 

 I understand your daughter not wanting to vacation in Thailand anymore. She has being there done that, there is a whole world for her to explore. 

 Thank you for your kind words, indeed I consider myself a lucky man to have met my wife, she changed my life for the better .  The joke between as is, When she calls me stupid, I alway reply "You married me and I am stupid" LOL 

[ICELANDMAN]

13 hours ago, sirineou said:

Dude at my age I have trouble handling the first one, never mind getting another one. ???? 

Ok more seriously. It seems to me that you live in an area where winter is never there if I am not wrong, I understand if one lives in Canada or Scandinavia where winters are insurmountable for the elderly with rheumatism, but you because you have fixed Thailand ? I would probably know that many foreigners have left or plan to leave in the near future like me personally.
I believe that instead of staring at changing your mind about your wife you should see inside yourself if that's what you really want, a solution could be to come and live a long period in Khon Kaen (a city with a high degree of pollution in this period) I think that in the long run you may see that the neighbour's grass is not so green.
If you follow this site you can read a lot about how Thailand has changed for the worse in recent years and the future is increasingly uncertain on many areas of life here.
Personally, I don't think it's a good idea to endanger a good relationship for an idea that only you decide is the best, and that you may blame yourself in the near future.

Good luck

 

[Thongkorn]

Dont Blame her she wanted and got a better life,

[sirineou]

13 hours ago, ICELANDMAN said:

Ok more seriously. It seems to me that you live in an area where winter is never there if I am not wrong, I understand if one lives in Canada or Scandinavia where winters are insurmountable for the elderly with rheumatism, but you because you have fixed Thailand ? I would probably know that many foreigners have left or plan to leave in the near future like me personally.
I believe that instead of staring at changing your mind about your wife you should see inside yourself if that's what you really want, a solution could be to come and live a long period in Khon Kaen (a city with a high degree of pollution in this period) I think that in the long run you may see that the neighbour's grass is not so green.
If you follow this site you can read a lot about how Thailand has changed for the worse in recent years and the future is increasingly uncertain on many areas of life here.
Personally, I don't think it's a good idea to endanger a good relationship for an idea that only you decide is the best, and that you may blame yourself in the near future.

Good luck

 

You are absolutely right. 

I have have being coming to thailand for over 13 years , 10 of which married and only staying a few months at the time  , any place would be nice that way. That's why I wanted to live there for a year or two and see how we like it. It is quite possible that after a while , I will feel the same as you and go back. I am not burning any bridges. 

I am not endangering my relationship with my wife. I love her very much, If she does not want to live there, I will not force the issue , I would be happy with my wife  anywhere, 

   

8 minutes ago, Thongkorn said:

Dont Blame her she wanted and got a better life,

I don't blame her. I understand and can see her perspective, Just as Thailand is different and exciting for me and I want to be there, I am sure the same applies to her and the US, with the additional bonus of greater opportunity.  We will come back to Thailand this spring and will see.

 I only started this thread  to share my experience,so that others in similar situations might consider it,  

[spidermike007]

I have taken my Thai wife to the US several times already. After four to six weeks we are both very excited to return here. She would never want to  live there and neither would I. It is a boring, dull, listless, predictable life back there.
 

No thank you. Not for less than $1.5 million a year. 

[sirineou]

9 minutes ago, spidermike007 said:

I have taken my Thai wife to the US several times already. After four to six weeks we are both very excited to return here. She would never want to  live there and neither would I. It is a boring, dull, listless, predictable life back there.
 

No thank you. Not for less than $1.5 million a year. 

Visiting some place for a few weeks is much different than moving there for years. Ihope you understand that. 

I don't know where in the US you go but  $1.5 million per year  is more than a bit over the top. 

[CNXexpat]

I met my wife in Germany when she visited her best friend. She came back two more times, then we married. After that we lived 10 years together in Germany and relocated 4 years ago to Chiang Mai. She was very happy in Germany and is happy now. 

[Nyezhov]

If you are from any country other than the USA (except maybe switzerland) and get a chance to win a prize in lifes lottery and live in the US, its probably unlikely that you would want to leave.

[sirineou]

Just now, CNXexpat said:

I met my wife in Germany when she visited her best friend. She came back two more times, then we married. After that we lived 10 years together in Germany and relocated 4 years ago to Chiang Mai. She was very happy in Germany and is happy now. 

Your story sound similar to ours, and hope we have a similar outcome. Nothing is set in stone yet.

We moved in the US  and the understanding was always that one day we will come back to Thailand, with that prospect in mind we build a very IMo nice house in Khon Kaen and also own a car there.

Now that I am retiring , wife sounds a bit apprehensive. and I wanted to share that possibility. 

We should be coming to Thailand this spring as we do every year, (keeping an eye on Coronavirus) so we will see. Keep tuned

 

 

[CNXexpat]

2 minutes ago, Nyezhov said:

If you are from any country other than the USA (except maybe switzerland) and get a chance to win a prize in lifes lottery and live in the US, its probably unlikely that you would want to leave.

It depends where you live and under which conditions. Poor in Chicago in an area controlled by gangs is not everybody´s dream. Also being poor in expensive cities like NY and San Francisco is not so nice - ok, it´s nowhere nice. Or in the middle of nowhere in Kansas, Alabama or Arizona is for sure not where I want to live. 
Do you know the prices in Switzerland? Having a good job with a good salary and it´s nice, having a lousy job with a low salary and you have a problem.

[Nyezhov]

2 minutes ago, CNXexpat said:

Also being poor in expensive cities like NY and San Francisco is not so nice - ok, it´s nowhere nice.

Yeah being poor surely sucks dont it? Like the lady out in the "suburbs" (read dirt road) out in Siem that kissed my hand and bowed to me because I "tipped" her 25 cents? Bet she wouldnt mind a trip here.

 

Maybe Ill walk across the street into the local market here and yell hey, who wants to live in the United States? Think anybody will take me upon that?

 

 

[Odysseus123]

As in most situations it is horses for courses...but I have witnessed several intense conversations going on amongst my friends over the last 6 months or so-with Thailand a definite thumbs down..

1.My Thai friend and his wife are preparing to go back to look after his aging parents-neither are happy about it but duty calls.

2.Two Thai wives have put the kybosh on their Aussie husband's dreams of retiring to Thailand-"Are you crazy?" just about sums up their argument.

 

Of course attitudes might change over time but most of the Thai folks that I have met are perfectly happy to be here (Oz) and are thoroughly motivated to succeed-and especially to see their children being successful in a new life.

[Roy Baht]

38 minutes ago, sirineou said:

  $1.5 million per year  is more than a bit over the top. 

Actually, if I think of how much it would cost for my (Thai) family and I to live in the States at the same level of comfort & security that we enjoy here in Thailand, $1.5M sounds about right.

[sirineou]

1 minute ago, Roy Baht said:

Actually, if I think of how much it would cost for my (Thai) family and I to live in the States at the same level of comfort & security that we enjoy here in Thailand, $1.5M sounds about right.

$1,5 million would mean that you spend $4110,00 per day, 

 

  

[CNXexpat]

34 minutes ago, Nyezhov said:

Yeah being poor surely sucks dont it? Like the lady out in the "suburbs" (read dirt road) out in Siem that kissed my hand and bowed to me because I "tipped" her 25 cents? Bet she wouldnt mind a trip here.

 

Maybe Ill walk across the street into the local market here and yell hey, who wants to live in the United States? Think anybody will take me upon that?

 

 

Sure. But then enter a hi-so club or restaurant in Bangkok and ask the same. I am sure you´ll get another answer. 

[ericthai]

On 1/19/2020 at 1:45 AM, cmarshall said:

The US economy as a whole is not in recession, but manufacturing in the US is in recession.  I think the poster was pointing to is the slowdown of trade with China which is indeed due to Trump's tariff policy, which has nevertheless failed to reduce the US trade deficit, which was 25% higher in 2018 than 2016.  As one result of reduced trade with China, Thailand's growth was slowing in 2019, although it has so far not entered recession.

 

It's true that the headline US unemployment figure looks good, that statistic hides certain facts.  For instance, the 2 million incarcerated people in the US are not counted as unemployed even though they don't have jobs, nor are discouraged workers who have given up looking for work.  A better statistic is the labor market participation rate which counts the percentage of working age people who have a job, rather than the "unemployed."  Here is that graph.  While most of this cannot be blamed on Trump, it is a reason American workers are not feeling as festive as they were in Bill Clinton's term of office.

 

Labor Market participation rate

dont know about all that drivel, but drive around the USA and all you see is help wanted signs everywhere! 

[AlexRich]

2 hours ago, CNXexpat said:

I met my wife in Germany when she visited her best friend. She came back two more times, then we married. After that we lived 10 years together in Germany and relocated 4 years ago to Chiang Mai. She was very happy in Germany and is happy now. 

 

I'd happily live in that area if it wasn't for the hellish pollution ... I can't help thinking that living there long term will reduce your life span. 

 

 

 

[spidermike007]

10 hours ago, sirineou said:

Visiting some place for a few weeks is much different than moving there for years. Ihope you understand that. 

I don't know where in the US you go but  $1.5 million per year  is more than a bit over the top. 

Yes, and I get to visit some places, and am spared the torture of having to live there. When I stated that i might consider moving back there for $1.5 mil a year, that was of course in jest, and I was attempting my level of disdain for the thought of having to live in the US, at this point in my life. Not if I can help it!

[Nyezhov]

10 hours ago, CNXexpat said:

Sure. But then enter a hi-so club or restaurant in Bangkok and ask the same. I am sure you´ll get another answer. 

Really. Well lets dress up, get into the Bently and head to a Hi So club and buy the entire bar a Jereboam of Moet. 

 

Bet we take a whole bunch back to the USA. ????

[CNXexpat]

8 hours ago, AlexRich said:

 

I'd happily live in that area if it wasn't for the hellish pollution ... I can't help thinking that living there long term will reduce your life span. 

 

 

 

The problem is nearly everywhere in Thailand.

[Nyezhov]

8 hours ago, ericthai said:

dont know about all that drivel, but drive around the USA and all you see is help wanted signs everywhere! 

I dont know why every topic has to turn into "Trump is bad" drivel (not your post dude) but here is an apochryphal story. We hire a lot of convicted felons, always have. One came by the other day, been there for 15 years, now gets $20 an hour. He crawls in sewer pipes with a shovel Apologizes and says that the competition wants to steal him, give him $22. So we gave him $25. Dude has maybe a second grade ghetto education, he's done time for manslaughter, smokes crack all weekedn so they pick himup at home and drag him to work, I personaly cant even understand half of what he says except for M......f....., n...... stuff like that. Im like, yo, what did you do last weekend...mumblemumblemumble bag a crack mumblemumblemumblemumble damn dat n...a had some fine m........f...... poos...... 

 

$25 an hour. Folks are stealing other folks employees. Unless they are Wesleyan graduates with a degree in feminist studies, then are padding the Unemployment stats and marching with silly hats.

 

I bet $1 USD that someone comes along to argue with me now just becasue I think the US economy is booming. Im not an economist, but maybe the bookeeper will tell me today, OK, you win, keep a condo in Bangkok too for when you have to come in for a dr visit from Cambo.

[CNXexpat]

13 minutes ago, Nyezhov said:

Really. Well lets dress up, get into the Bently and head to a Hi So club and buy the entire bar a Jereboam of Moet. 

 

Bet we take a whole bunch back to the USA. ????

It depends which kind of life you promise them in the USA. A life is of a Wal-Mart employee or a rich one. 

My dentist is married with a dentist and they are traveling around the world (Europe, New Zealand, Japan, India, etc.) and she prefers to live in Thailand 

[Nyezhov]

3 minutes ago, CNXexpat said:

It depends which kind of life you promise them in the USA. A life is of a Wal-Mart employee or a rich one. 

My dentist is married with a dentist and they are traveling around the world (Europe, New Zealand, Japan, India, etc.) and she prefers to live in Thailand 

Dude like are you arguing just for the sake of arguing? You arent going to outmatch me, very few do. You know the point I am making so why y'all draggin it out? 

 

You walk up to 99% of the people outside the USA and say, hey, today is St. Pattys day and one person can come live in the USA, do you want to? I bet the answer is yes.

 

Now me, if some hot chick wanted me to live with her in Monaco forever, I would sigh, and say byby in Monacoease to everywhere. Where are the baguettes? 

[CNXexpat]

12 hours ago, Nyezhov said:

If you are from any country other than the USA (except maybe switzerland) and get a chance to win a prize in lifes lottery and live in the US, its probably unlikely that you would want to leave.

 

1 hour ago, Nyezhov said:

Dude like are you arguing just for the sake of arguing? You arent going to outmatch me, very few do. You know the point I am making so why y'all draggin it out? 

You wrote, that everybody from outside the USA (and Switzerland) would be happy to live in the USA - and that´s nonsense. There are many countries in the world they are similar or better in life quality and not everybody likes the American way of life. I prefer the western European way of life.

[sirineou]

7 hours ago, Nyezhov said:

Really. Well lets dress up, get into the Bently and head to a Hi So club and buy the entire bar a Jereboam of Moet. 

 

Bet we take a whole bunch back to the USA. ????

Ok but my Bentley is in the shop can we use yours? 

[sirineou]

7 hours ago, Nyezhov said:

I dont know why every topic has to turn into "Trump is bad" drivel (not your post dude) but here is an apochryphal story. We hire a lot of convicted felons, always have. One came by the other day, been there for 15 years, now gets $20 an hour. He crawls in sewer pipes with a shovel Apologizes and says that the competition wants to steal him, give him $22. So we gave him $25. Dude has maybe a second grade ghetto education, he's done time for manslaughter, smokes crack all weekedn so they pick himup at home and drag him to work, I personaly cant even understand half of what he says except for M......f....., n...... stuff like that. Im like, yo, what did you do last weekend...mumblemumblemumble bag a crack mumblemumblemumblemumble damn dat n...a had some fine m........f...... poos...... 

 

$25 an hour. Folks are stealing other folks employees. Unless they are Wesleyan graduates with a degree in feminist studies, then are padding the Unemployment stats and marching with silly hats.

 

I bet $1 USD that someone comes along to argue with me now just becasue I think the US economy is booming. Im not an economist, but maybe the bookeeper will tell me today, OK, you win, keep a condo in Bangkok too for when you have to come in for a dr visit from Cambo.

Who other than you said anything about trump?

 

[rabang]

I doubt my GF would enjoy living in my country and as I don't want to stay in Thailand any longer it means eventually breaking up with her. No way I am going to give up everything for a woman.

[sirineou]

5 hours ago, rabang said:

I doubt my GF would enjoy living in my country and as I don't want to stay in Thailand any longer it means eventually breaking up with her. No way I am going to give up everything for a woman.

cant think of a better reason.

[rabang]

16 hours ago, sirineou said:

cant think of a better reason.

I feel deeply sorry for men like you.

[sirineou]

Just now, rabang said:

I feel deeply sorry for men like you.

Thank you