Came across several lovely people news blurbs lately. "Why not share them with those stalwart companions in Beddie?" I thought. So I will start off with one. Please add your finds at will.

A plumbing company employee in the UK was forced to take his first sick leave ever because of an ingrown toenail that requires surgery. However, a hospital backlog means Mr Buster Martin will be off work for a few months. He said that he loves to work and that he will be miserable stuck at home. Apparently, work agrees with him: He is the UK's oldest worker at 100 years young.

Source: Maclean's magazine.

See, Cawboy, you don't have to stop working at 55.

Amazing isn't it?

Just watched a talkshow with a famous interviewer in my country....he had 4 Ladies at his table, ALL of them 100, 101 and 102 (+ 4 months).

Chique, kind of classy ladies, who had a lot to tell and were all in good health with a good brain and lot's of humor.

One of them just had her 15th grand-grand child born; unbelievable. Another one just gave up driving at 99...

Wow!

I sign for that !

LaoPo

Gave up driving at 99. Too sweet. Ain't life grand, LP?

Here's a stupeedie:

Students from rival campus organizations at the Dawood Engineering College in Karachi, Pakistan, had fistfights and threw furniture at each other in a confrontation over which group should get credit for putting up posters urging students not to fight on campus.

Daily Times (Lahore, Pakistan)

Earth’s orbital traffic jam:

About 1,600 satellites orbit the planet, several of which are no longer operational. However, many hobby trackers believe that at any given time, “about five spy satellites from various countries have a view of your head.”

One 4-cubic-inch model called Cute-1 and launched by Tokyo students is still in orbit and mainly relays news that “it still works.”

Often, shooting stars spotted at dusk in the nothernish hemisphere are communication satellites (hey, there goes UBC, Honey!).

Complied from info in Discover magazine

LaoPo, quick question. I like your contibution, but I must ask you, honestly, if you, for example, were a famous tv presenter in your country, and could have 4 ladies around your table, wouldn't you choose ladies who were , well, you know... A bit younger, fitter, etc...

I dunno. You sure the guy was from your country? Maybe he;s an immigrant, from germany, or belgium or something...

WHAAAAAAA....another German basher!! whingewhinge...you are soooooo meean, Kayo! <sniff>

I agree with the Belgians, though....

LaoPo, quick question. I like your contibution, but I must ask you, honestly, if you, for example, were a famous tv presenter in your country, and could have 4 ladies around your table, wouldn't you choose ladies who were , well, you know... A bit younger, fitter, etc...

I dunno. You sure the guy was from your country? Maybe he;s an immigrant, from germany, or belgium or something...

No, honestly, Im not a tv presenter, so I'm not famous either.

But if I would have to choose....hmmm..I'll phone you, OK? And the guy was indeed from my country but he speaks the languages from the countries around us...

And...younger ladies might be more appealing to have on the table but than again, 100+ year old Ladies are so great to watch and they have so much to tell.

One of them even 'survived' 3 Queens and 1 still in 'office'...but also about to retire in the next 1 or 2 years, how about that ?

LaoPo

At Songkran I got a blessing from the oldest person in our Tambon....people say she's 105 but I think they exagerate....anyway.....I always like to ask old people things about how it was....this time she told us about when she was first married and she moved to her present location that they bought several rai of land AND a house for 60 baht....and how then the money was all coins and how today you can easily carry 100,00 baht or 200,000 baht around with you but back then it was really really heavy to carry around so much money!!!! Also that when she was young she used to ride horses...and when she mentioned this her eyes really lit up and her smile was just splendid!!!!!

Government in Action

In February, when housing officials in Loebau, Germany, ran out of small apartments for low-income residents, they decided to put them in quarters that were larger than regulations allowed. However, the officials made the residents close off some rooms to stay within the allotted space and said inspectors would make regular visits to see that no one cheated. [Reuters, 2-5-07]

Garri Holness, 39, is one of the Britons in a bad place at the time of the July 2005 subway bombings, and he suffered the loss of a leg, for which government programs compensated him with more than 100,000 British pounds (about $190,000). That is more than 10 times the amount of government compensation (in 2005 pounds) received by each of the two teenage girls from a vicious 1985 gang rape that Holness was convicted of participating in (and for which he served seven years in prison). [Daily Mail (London), 1-26-07]

LaoPo, quick question. I like your contibution, but I must ask you, honestly, if you, for example, were a famous tv presenter in your country, and could have 4 ladies around your table, wouldn't you choose ladies who were , well, you know... A bit younger, fitter, etc...

I dunno. You sure the guy was from your country? Maybe he;s an immigrant, from germany, or belgium or something...

OR KAZAKSTAN!!? I watched the 'Borat' movie last night ... sounds like his style - hehe!

But first, the news from the Two Ronnies.

"After three years of hard work, Irish intelligence experts today cracked Britain’s highway code."

"The Prime Minister gave some interesting figures on education today. In the greater London area, one half of the people can’t read, one half can’t write, and the other three quarters can’t add up."

"The Ministry of Defense have announced new pay scales for the army, heavily favoring the NCO’s. Said a new recruit, 'It’s all very well for the sergeants and the corporals, but it’s a nasty blow to the privates.'"

"Sacked door to door salesman Bristow Saunders took his case to an industrial tribunal today, but they all lay on the floor and pretended to be out."

"The House of Commons was sealed off today after police chased an escaped lunatic through the front door during Prime Minister’s question time. A spokesman at Scotland Yard said it was like looking for a needle in a haystack."

"West Mersea police announced tonight that they wish to interview a man wearing high heels and frilly knickers, but the Chief Constable said they must wear their normal uniforms."

"Many old music hall fans were present at the funeral today of Fred “Chuckles” Jenkins, Britain’s oldest and unfunniest comedian. In tribute, the vicar read out one of Fred’s jokes, and the congregation had two minutes silence."

"Latest on the bullion robbery: At Wansforth Police Station, a man who’s as deaf as a post, and doesn’t speak english, with a terrible stutter, bad breath and squeaky shoes, is not helping the police with their inquiries one little bit."

"At London’s Heathrow, senior customs officer Seaforth Mumbly retired today. He shook hands with passengers passing through the customs, and confiscated a gold watch for himself."

"There was a fire at the main Inland Revenue office in London today, but it was put out before any serious good was done."

"The search for the man who terrorizes nudist camps with a bacon slicer goes on. Inspector Lemuel Jones had a tip-off this morning, but hopes to be back on duty tomorrow."

"The Metropolitan Police today denied that prisoners in their custody are excessively pampered. This follows yesterday's report that a man was hustled out of New Scotland Yard with an electric blanket over his head."

"And we’ve just heard that a juggernaut of onions has shed its load all over the M-1. Motorists are advised to find a hard shoulder to cry on."

"Following the dispute with the domestic servants' union at Buckingham Palace today, the queen, a radiant figure in a white silk gown and crimson robe, swept down the main staircase and through the hall. She then dusted the cloak room and vacuumed the lounge."

"After a series of crimes in the Glasgow area, Chief Inspector McTavish has announced that he's looking for a man with one eye. If he doesn't find him, he's going to use both eyes."

"The perfect crime was committed last night, when thieves broke into Scotland Yard and stole all the toilets. Police say they have absolutely nothing to go on."

"And we've just heard that in the English Channel, a ship carrying red paint has collided with a ship carrying purple paint. It is believed that both crews have been marooned."

"Police broke into the home of Ireland's most brilliant forger today and took away two million seven pound notes."

"Today in the courts, an unemployed laborer was found guilty of running up and down Downing Street at two o'clock in the morning shouting, 'All the government is barmy!' He was given a two pound fine for being drunk and disorderly and a ten year jail sentence for revealing a state secret."

"In Newport Pagnel this evening, Mr. Horace Whipsley, the world's most superstitious motorist, known for the lucky horseshoe dangling from his rear window, the sprig of heather on his wipers, the St. Christopher suspended from his dashboard and the four rabbit's feet in his glove compartment -- was run over by thirteen steamrollers."

"We've just this moment heard that the two pandas at the London Zoo have begun to mate. The winner meets Gary Kasparov in the final."

"The West Drayton man who has kept himself awake every night for seventeen years by snoring has at least found the answer. He's going to sleep in another room."

"We have a report from the team who've been investigating the social habits of Mr. and Mrs. Average. Unfortunately, Mr. Average was not at home. He'd slipped down to Brighton with Mrs. Well-Above Average."

"It was revealed in a government survey published today that the Prime Minister is doing the work of two men. Laurel and Hardy."

"Doctors treating Latimer Rudge, the health service’s fiercest critic, said tonight they are very pleased with his condition. He’s dead."

"Bad news tonight concerning missing gang leader and drag artist Sylvan Valour. Apparently, he’s been found at the bottom of the Thames wearing a pair of concrete slingbacks."

"There was a strange happening during a performance of Elgar’s “Sea Pictures” at a concert hall in Bermuda tonight, when the man playing the triangle disappeared."

"The BBC tonight announced tonight that as a special tribute to Selwyn Wedgley, Britain’s leading understudy. The BBC will be showing a special season of everybody else’s films."

"Police have stepped up the search for Laxley Druitt, a member of Parliament who’s gone off his chump. They fear that in his present state of mind, he might do something sensible."

"Proof positive tonight that criminals are getting younger and younger. A couple in Bridgewater had their bedroom ransacked while they were watching television, but caught the burglar when he called downstairs for a glass of water."

"At a special meeting of the executive committee of the Extremely Shy and Painfully Self-Conscious Society tonight, the members gave themselves a vote of no confidence."

"Roughhouse Row, Tower Hamlets, which is London’s toughest street, held a party today for its oldest inhabitant. He’ll be twenty-three on Monday."

"On sale in Siberia today, were perfectly preserved frozen steaks of Siberian Mammoths from the last ice age. A spokesman said they’re cheap and nutritious, but take four thousand years to defrost."

"F. C. Rawls, the train conductor, who has faithfully handed his wife his wage packet every month for the last 20 years, was divorced today. She found out he was paid every week."

"J. Thimble Gluck, the Middlesborough man who doesn’t smoke, drink or gamble and has never had a girlfriend, tried to celebrate his fortieth birthday today, but couldn’t think how to."

"George Mumble, the home county’s most henpecked husband, died today. By the terms of his will, his ashes will be scattered all over his wife’s new living room carpet."

"In next week’s program, we’ll be talking to a man who's been unemployed for nine years, but has now landed a good, steady job. He changes the prices at petrol stations."

"Then we’ll be hearing of the impact of sillicone treatments in nursery land, when we talk to Not-So-Little Bo Peep, Far-From-Little Miss Muffet and Enormous Jack Horner."

"We’ll also be talking to the farmer who crossed a gossip columnist with an apple, and got a golden malicious."

"And we shall be meeting the brilliant top civil servant who’s got his ear to the ground, his nose to the grindstone, his shoulder to the wheel, his eye on the clock, his hand in the till, his back to the wall, his foot in the door and his finger on the button. And we’ll be asking him how he does his flies up."

"We’ll be investigating rumors that the president of the dairy council has become a Mason, and goes around giving his colleagues the secret milkshake."

"And we'll look into complaints about the motor industry and we'll show you something that fell of the back of a lorry -- it's the front of a lorry."

"Then we'll be discussing the bread shortage with a man who's been throwing IOU's to the ducks."

"And we'll hear the band of the Royal Cross-Eyed Dragoons, who'll play 'The Dance of the Sugar Plum Sailor' followed by 'What Shall We Do with the Drunken Fairy?'."

"Finally, we'll continue our investigation into the political beliefs of nudists. We've already noticed a definate swing to the left."

"Until then, it's goodnight from me."

"And it's goodnight from him."

But first, the news from the Two Ronnies.

"After three years of hard work, Irish intelligence experts today cracked Britain’s highway code."

..............

For example, Richard Hayes, the Director of the National Library, comes in for criticism in this book for his role as Irish Film Censor.

Strangely enough, there is no mention that Hayes, a fluent German speaker and code expert, was also an officer in G2, the Irish intelligence service. He was able to crack the German spy codes.

Irish President Eamonn De Valéra then allowed this information to be shared with British military intelligence and together both services were able to spy on the German Legation in Dublin, not only picking up vital information but feeding the Nazi war machine false information.

http://www.thecnj.com/review/041207/books041207_02.html

:D :D

Sudan man forced to 'marry' goat

A Sudanese man has been forced to take a goat as his "wife", after he was caught having 'xxx' with the animal.

The goat's owner, Mr Alifi, said he surprised the man with his goat and took him to a council of elders.

They ordered the man, Mr Tombe, to pay a dowry of 15,000 Sudanese dinars ($50) to Mr Alifi.

"We have given him the goat, and as far as we know they are still together," Mr Alifi said

from the BBC News/Africa, so it must be true...

LaoPo

X 50 or so. Brill to the mill.

LannareB, that is so EU about the apts. I remember the rejection of imported bananas on size restrictions.

And like did you have to tell them all at one go, Robski?

Marrying a goat, LaoPo. hmm, bleets back, doesn't make dinner, clean or do laundry. Procreation? Shiteskis, those boys have used goats and sheep for practise for centuries, no? BBC must be true...I used to think so.

This onslaught of tidbitties calls for a search of magnitudes beyond the Internet realm for something nobody can Google.

busybusybusybusy

A mysterious hole has appeared in the westbound carriageway of the M56 at Runcorn. The Cheshire police are looking into it.

Came across several lovely people news blurbs lately. "Why not share them with those stalwart companions in Beddie?" I thought. So I will start off with one. Please add your finds at will.

A plumbing company employee in the UK was forced to take his first sick leave ever because of an ingrown toenail that requires surgery. However, a hospital backlog means Mr Buster Martin will be off work for a few months. He said that he loves to work and that he will be miserable stuck at home. Apparently, work agrees with him: He is the UK's oldest worker at 100 years young.

Source: Maclean's magazine.

Excellent story

See, Cawboy, you don't have to stop working at 55.

Unfortunately in Thailand the dept of labour disagrees. Depending on the situation we can continue after 55 but the position is one of adviser or consultant. However it is not clear (never is with Thailand) on whether that applies to foreigners.

CB

The West Tennessee Detention Facility (Mason, Tenn.) made a video pitch for California inmates, hoping some would volunteer to be outsourced under that state's program to relieve overcrowding. The hard-timers should come east, the video urged, because of West Tennessee's "larger and cleaner jail cells, 79 TV channels, including ESPN, views of peaceful cow pastures, and ... the 'Dorm of the Week,' (with its inmates) staying up all night, watching a movie and eating cheeseburgers or pizza," according to a March description in Nashville's Tennessean. "You're not a number here," said one inmate. "You come here, it's personalized." (California's outsourcing program is facing a lawsuit from the prison guards' union, anxious about job loss.) [The Tennessean, 3-6-07]

The Internet Toilet Paper Museum and Historical Archives;

http://nobodys-perfect.com/vtpm/ExhibitHal.../tphistory.html

Complementing cdnvic's contribution to a short history of toilet etiquette I present a history of the Cr@pper.

http://www.victoriancrapper.com/Toilethistory.HTML

The West Tennessee Detention Facility (Mason, Tenn.) made a video pitch for California inmates, hoping some would volunteer to be outsourced under that state's program to relieve overcrowding. The hard-timers should come east, the video urged, because of West Tennessee's "larger and cleaner jail cells, 79 TV channels, including ESPN, views of peaceful cow pastures, and ... the 'Dorm of the Week,' (with its inmates) staying up all night, watching a movie and eating cheeseburgers or pizza," according to a March description in Nashville's Tennessean. "You're not a number here," said one inmate. "You come here, it's personalized." (California's outsourcing program is facing a lawsuit from the prison guards' union, anxious about job loss.) [The Tennessean, 3-6-07]

Sh*t, sign me up. I'll purloin Kayo's Raybans, truss him up somewhere and leave a ransom note. Will that get me in? I do need a sunset view in my room though. Hours of free writing time.

The Internet Toilet Paper Museum and Historical Archives;

http://nobodys-perfect.com/vtpm/ExhibitHal.../tphistory.html

Splinter free...55555555555555555

The West Tennessee Detention Facility (Mason, Tenn.) made a video pitch for California inmates, hoping some would volunteer to be outsourced under that state's program to relieve overcrowding. The hard-timers should come east, the video urged, because of West Tennessee's "larger and cleaner jail cells, 79 TV channels, including ESPN, views of peaceful cow pastures, and ... the 'Dorm of the Week,' (with its inmates) staying up all night, watching a movie and eating cheeseburgers or pizza," according to a March description in Nashville's Tennessean. "You're not a number here," said one inmate. "You come here, it's personalized." (California's outsourcing program is facing a lawsuit from the prison guards' union, anxious about job loss.) [The Tennessean, 3-6-07]

Sh*t, sign me up. I'll purloin Kayo's Raybans, truss him up somewhere and leave a ransom note. Will that get me in? I do need a sunset view in my room though. Hours of free writing time.

If you slip the concierge a twenty, Jet, I'm sure he can find you something nice.

Government:

In February, the government of southwestern China's Fumin county decided to improve the feng shui (the harmony of the physical environment) for villagers next to mined-out Laoshou mountain, not by planting trees but by spray-painting the mountainside green. An employee at the county "forestry" department declined to comment to an Associated Press reporter. [Globe & Mail (Toronto)-AP, 2-14-07]

The local government's tourist information center in Swindon, England, told author Mark Sutton that his World War I-themed book, "Tell Them of Us," could not be sold in its bookstore unless Sutton demonstrated that he had liability insurance, not for potentially libelous passages but in case readers, for example, suffered paper cuts turning the pages. Said Swindon Borough Council spokesman Richard Freeman, "We have to cover every eventuality." [Evening Standard (London), 2-24-07]

People Confused by "Mother": The head teacher of Johnstown Primary School in Carmarthen, Wales, ordered in February that there be no Mother's Day cards in school this year because it might be upsetting to students without a mother. [Daily Mail (London), 2-7-07]

A government-funded advisory report to Britain's National Health Service recommended that medical staffs not use the terms "mum" and "dad" (and use "guardians" or "carers"), especially since the terms might be confusing or alienating to children of gay couples. [The Sun (London), 2-19-07]

According to a report commissioned by Britain's Department of Education and Skills, some history teachers have dropped references to the Holocaust (and the 11th-century Crusades) out of fear that the regular history curriculum might confuse or anger Muslim students who have been taught differently in local mosques (according to an April story in London's Daily Mail). And London's Daily Telegraph reported in March that the head teacher at a school in Huddersfield had changed the June student festival production of Roald Dahl's "The Three Little Pigs" to "The Three Little Puppies," out of fear that Muslim children would be uncomfortable singing "pig" references. (A local Muslim spokesman immediately condemned the change as unnecessary, and the school overruled the teacher.) [Daily Mail, 4-1-07] [Daily Telegraph, 3-16-07]

Biologists at Germany's University of Jena announced in January that they were terminating a research project on animal movements after three years because they were tired of waiting for a sloth named Mats to leave his perch. [boston Globe-AP, 1-24-07]

Round-the-world cyclist's bike stolen in UK - Britain - Times Online © 2006 Timesonline

He's been knocked down by a truck in the Chilean desert, chased by a mob through the streets of Haiti, burnt by a volcano in Central America, and arrested and shot at more times than he cares to remember.

But in 44 years on the road, covering 335,000 miles or more than ten times around the Earth, Heinz Stücke has always had his lucky bicycle for company - until this week, when the German 'Bike Man' had it stolen within a few hours of arriving in the UK.

Herr Stücke, 66, arrived in Portsmouth on Sunday evening of a ferry from the French port of Le Havre and put up his tent nearby. A few hours later, at 3am on Monday, he realised that his bike - which he had tied up with rope and bungee cord - had gone missing.

He told the Portsmouth News: "I always sleep with my tent door open so that I can see it.'I woke up at 3am and I immediately thought 'I must check my bike' – like I always do. But when I looked outside, it was gone."

The stolen three-speed bicycle, on which the record-breaking cyclist has ridden since he started his "endless journey" in 1962, is black with two sets of handlebars to allow Herr Stücketo change his riding position. It is also covered with stickers from around the world.

Herr Stücke got the cycling bug as a child, cycling through the German countryside on his holidays. He took his first extended trip in 1958, around the Mediterranean, and set off again a year later pedalling more than 10,000 miles through 20 countries.

Finally in 1962, with John F Kennedy still in the White House, he set off for good.

Pc Paul Jones, the Portsmouth policeman who received the report of the theft, has taken pity on the cyclist and arranged for him to receive another bike from police lost property.

Herr Stücke said that he appreciated the gesture but added that he would keep on hunting for the old one.

"I would do anything to get my bike back - I'm emotionally attached to it," he said.

http://www.bikechina.com/ct-heinzstucke1z.html

Condom found in child's Happy meal

Thursday Apr 26 12:13 AEST

A New Zealand mother says she was shocked and disgusted that a condom had been found in her seven-year-old daughter's McDonald's meal.

Louise Whitaker from Wellington said her daughter Maia was with her sister April and her grandparents at a store when the condom was found on Tuesday night.

She said her mother discovered the opened condom after her daughter ordered a Happy Meal.

"I was just disgusted after I heard about it," Whitaker said.

"I was shocked. A seven-year-old ... I don't think she actually saw it, so she doesn't understand the whole thing. I am just lucky my mother discovered it."

She said the condom was returned before her mother checked whether or not it had been used.

McDonald's replaced the meal.

She said the fast food restaurant had not given her a formal apology nor explained how the condom came to be in the meal.

Whitaker said she had heard from a journalist that the Happy Meal had been on public display and could have had the condom put in by a mischief-maker before it was given to her daughter.

"We have been overseas recently and we always went to McDonald's, thinking they had an international policy where everything is safe and done the right way. This has just sort of changed my opinion," Whitaker said.

A McDonald's spokeswoman said the restaurant was embarrassed by the incident and was studying in-store video to see how the condom ended up in the package.

She said it was likely Maia had been given a display model that had been on a counter facing customers.

"It sounds like ... someone has actually come along and thought they were potentially clever or funny - of which they were neither - and has put this in," she said.

©AAP 2007

Mummy - this meat is meat is really chewy. I have about another five add ons but decided my existance in Bedlam has been under enough scrutiny over the last couple of weeks without doing a whole lot of condom in hamburger lines

CB

Having trouble getting out of bed on time this week? Then having a quick shower and no time to make yourself a coffee?

Help is at hand!

Story 1

Shower lattes for late risers

INVENTORS have created a soap infused with caffeine which is said to help users wake up in the morning.

Shower Shock supplies the caffeine equivalent of two cups of coffee per wash.

The scented stimulant is absorbed naturally through the skin, according to its manufacturers, who say it is designed for people who don't have enough time for a cup of coffee in the morning.

The soap is available on the internet.

Story 2

Shower Shock Caffeinated Soap

Mornings Have Never Been So Invigorating!

Tired of waking up and having to wait for your morning java to brew? Are you one of those groggy early morning types that just needs that extra kick? Know any programmers who dont regularly bathe and need some special motivation? Introducing Shower Shock, the original and world's first caffeinated soap from ThinkGeek. When you think about it, ShowerShock is the ultimate clean buzz It Works!

Shower Shock is an all vegetable based glycerine soap which does *not* contain any harsh ingredients like ethanol, diethanolamine, polyethylene glycol or cocyl isethionate. So it's a gently invigorating soap Scented with peppermint oil and infused with caffeine anhydrous, each bar of Shower shock contains approximately 12 servings/showers per 4 ounce bar with 200 milligrams of caffeine per serving. No, we're not kidding and no you don't eat it. The caffeine is absorbed through the skin...

Have smelly co-workers that sleep in too much? Give them the gift of Shower Shock...

Peter

Source

Japanese fooled in poodle scam

Thousands of Japanese have been swindled in a scam in which they were sold Australian and British sheep and told they were poodles.

Flocks of sheep were imported to Japan and then sold by a company called Poodles as Pets, marketed as fashionable accessories, available at $1,600 each.

That is a snip compared to a real poodle which retails for twice that much in Japan.

The scam was uncovered when Japanese moviestar Maiko Kawamaki went on a talk-show and wondered why her new pet would not bark or eat dog food.

She was crestfallen when told it was a sheep.

Then hundreds of other women got in touch with police to say they feared their new "poodle" was also a sheep.

One couple said they became suspicious when they took their "dog" to have its claws trimmed and were told it had hooves.

Japanese police believe there could be 2,000 people affected by the scam, which operated in Sapporo and capitalised on the fact that sheep are rare in Japan, so many do not know what they look like.

"We launched an investigation after we were made aware that a company were selling sheep as poodles," Japanese police said, the The Sun reported.

"Sadly we think there is more than one company operating in this way.

"The sheep are believed to have been imported from overseas - Britain, Australia."

Many of the sheep have now been donated to zoos and farms.

Peter

they became suspicious when they took their "dog" to have its claws trimmed and were told it had hooves.

Had that problem with my tresses at the hair salon; the "stylist" said they had "split" ends and needed to be chopped off. Ha. Forked-tongue ageless beauty derised by a winker scissor-holder. Another example of the travesty of true style.