What was the outcome when your daughter found out your TGF was younger than her?

[Speedhump]

For me it depends on actual age. A 65 year old man with a 35 year old woman, I think it's fine. If she's 20 then I'm uncomfortable, but it's not my business. I hope daughters could be understanding up to a point. My wife of 45 years died three months ago. I try not to let on to women as they can be quite predatory here (and I understand that). I'm talking professional women, not bar girls, who also of course can be nice or not.

Edited July 9, 2023 by Speedhump
Speeling and grammer

[Yellowtail]

1 hour ago, Speedhump said:

For me it depends on actual age. A 65 year old man with a 35 year old woman, I think it's fine. If she's 20 then I'm uncomfortable, but it's not my business. I hope daughters could be understanding up to a point. My wife of 45 years died three months ago. I try not to let on to women as they can be quite predatory here (and I understand that). I'm talking professional women, not bar girls, who also of course can be nice or not.

Sorry about your wife. 

 

The 65-20s I typically see do not look like husband and wife. 

 

Most of what I see in Bangkok is 30/50 wife to 50/70 husband.

 

 

[HandsomeTallFarang]

On 7/8/2023 at 6:40 AM, Tazmo said:

The outcome for me wasn’t good at first with my youngest daughter but great now.

When my Thai gf became pregnant, her family put pressure upon her for pregnancy outside wedlock.

So I decided to go with the flow and agreed with a ‘Thai blessing’, which they see as a marriage!

 I told my 5 children. The eldest two who are 5&6 years older than my partner were ok with it.

But my youngest, in her 30’s, appeared to disapprove, her email stating that she didn’t understand me, blah blah blah. I replied saying I understood because when I went through some emotional trauma after separation from her mother, I never shared this with her, I felt it not to be her business but dealt with it myself. She didn’t reply but as fate had it my partner had a miscarriage. So I visited them all on holiday shortly after and was able to give an account of events and partner’s background etc Partner is a Teacher. They all seemed okay.

Then on my next visit I took my partner and all was okay, they got on well, became friends on fb etc

And then the youngest one came to Thailand ( her 3rd visit) with her bf and stayed with us.

Alls well that ends well!

 I have never interfered nor disapproved of their relationships, regardless of age, race, color, sexual orientation. They have to live their own life. We all have our own karma  plus inherited Karma, according to Yogic Science which is older than modern science!

No such thing as Karma ???? ????

Edited July 9, 2023 by HandsomeTallFarang

[jimn]

Not a daughter, but my wife was 11 years younger than my eldest son when I first brought her to the UK 10 years ago. No problems at all

[GinBoy2]

On 7/6/2023 at 8:02 PM, Grumpy one said:

My ex found out I had a g/f who was 3 years older than our daughter.

It wasn't long before my kids started treating me like a leper.

I then did the right thing and married said g/f, and had a clearing sale of all my possessions in Aus

Now we live in bliss with no contact from the ex or the kids

That's actually really sad.

 

I couldn't imagine a situation where I didn't talk to my daughters and Grandkids.

 

I'm kinda lucky my 2 American daughters are only a few years older than my Thai son, he lives a block away from my eldest daughter in Denver, with his new wife and baby.

 

My other daughter has given us two Grandkids, and I couldn't be happier. Kids without the hassle and sleepless nights of having kids!

 

Couldn't ever imagine what I would feel if I'd given that up because of my sex life choices

[thaibeachlovers]

33 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

That's actually really sad.

 

I couldn't imagine a situation where I didn't talk to my daughters and Grandkids.

 

I'm kinda lucky my 2 American daughters are only a few years older than my Thai son, he lives a block away from my eldest daughter in Denver, with his new wife and baby.

 

My other daughter has given us two Grandkids, and I couldn't be happier. Kids without the hassle and sleepless nights of having kids!

 

Couldn't ever imagine what I would feel if I'd given that up because of my sex life choices

That's your choice. What other people choose is their business.

[Yellowtail]

1 hour ago, GinBoy2 said:

That's actually really sad.

 

I couldn't imagine a situation where I didn't talk to my daughters and Grandkids.

 

I'm kinda lucky my 2 American daughters are only a few years older than my Thai son, he lives a block away from my eldest daughter in Denver, with his new wife and baby.

 

My other daughter has given us two Grandkids, and I couldn't be happier. Kids without the hassle and sleepless nights of having kids!

 

Couldn't ever imagine what I would feel if I'd given that up because of my sex life choices

Would you assume that the marriage to the first wife was because of sex life choices? 

 

I generally like your posts, but you seem a bit condescending here. 

 

I only married once, and I married because I wanted kids, not because I wanted to have sex. 

[BritManToo]

2 hours ago, GinBoy2 said:

That's actually really sad.

I couldn't imagine a situation where I didn't talk to my daughters and Grandkids.

I'm kinda lucky my 2 American daughters are only a few years older than my Thai son, he lives a block away from my eldest daughter in Denver, with his new wife and baby.

My other daughter has given us two Grandkids, and I couldn't be happier. Kids without the hassle and sleepless nights of having kids!

Couldn't ever imagine what I would feel if I'd given that up because of my sex life choices

My former Brit wife made all my choices.

I played no part in her decisions, or her 'sex life choices'.

 

I married again in Thailand because I wanted children.

If my choices were about sex, I'd be single and living in Pattaya.

Edited July 10, 2023 by BritManToo

[GinBoy2]

On 7/9/2023 at 8:14 PM, Yellowtail said:

Would you assume that the marriage to the first wife was because of sex life choices? 

 

I generally like your posts, but you seem a bit condescending here. 

 

I only married once, and I married because I wanted kids, not because I wanted to have sex. 

Didn't mean to be condescending at all.

 

Sex is a huge part of our lives as adults.

 

But all I wanted to say, maybe not so well is that I would put my kids before anything else in my life.

 

I would die for them, put my own happiness aside to keep them. 

 

I'm not disparaging anyone else, we all make our own choices, but this happens to be my line in the sand, which hopefully I will never have to cross 

[thaibeachlovers]

9 hours ago, GinBoy2 said:

Didn't mean to be condescending at all.

 

Sex is a huge part of our lives as adults.

 

But all I wanted to say, maybe not so well is that I would put my kids before anything else in my life.

 

I would die for them, put my own happiness aside to keep them. 

 

I'm not disparaging anyone else, we all make our own choices, but this happens to be my line in the sand, which hopefully I will never have to cross 

Good for you, but IMO no one should have children unless they are willing to go the distance for them. Unfortunately too many are born to <deleted> parents who don't care about them.

 

I wouldn't, but I never had any.

[BritManToo]

10 hours ago, GinBoy2 said:

Sex is a huge part of our lives as adults.

Sex plays almost ZERO part in the life of most western men aged over 40.

Unless you're gay or are happy to do it alone.

 

Look at Huw ...... earning 400kGBP/year and has to trawl gay dating sites.

Edited July 14, 2023 by BritManToo

[rickudon]

My Thai wife was older than my daughter, but not old enough to be a step mother. Daughter didn't want me to have more kids, thought it would be unlikely, but it happened pretty quick. I think my UK daughter had issues with me being out of the UK, but has got to accept now she has a family of her own. 

And for the neigh Sayers, i had no problem becoming a father at age 60, have a good relationship with my Thai daughter (now 11). Someone said you should have a Vasectomy at 40? sad person.

 

Age difference of 20 years is fine, works in Thailand. UK relatives a bit funny about  me having non-British wives and younger ones, got called the 'black sheep of the family' by a cousin! And all my aunts and Uncles expected that quiet retiring lad to stay a Batchelor..

Edited July 14, 2023 by rickudon

[GinBoy2]

12 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Sex plays almost ZERO part in the life of most western men aged over 40.

Unless you're gay or are happy to do it alone.

 

Look at Huw ...... earning 400kGBP/year and has to trawl gay dating sites.

I had to do a web search for 'Huw'

 

I guess he's a TV guy in the UK got caught trolling young gay guy's

[thaibeachlovers]

16 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Sex plays almost ZERO part in the life of most western men aged over 40.

Unless you're gay or are happy to do it alone.

 

Look at Huw ...... earning 400kGBP/year and has to trawl gay dating sites.

Unless you're gay or are happy to do it alone, or move to LOS.

 

Fixed it for you.

[thaibeachlovers]

11 hours ago, rickudon said:

Someone said you should have a Vasectomy at 40? sad person.

I'd have had one at 20 ( when I realised I never wanted a kid ) but the quacks won't do it in western countries till the man has had a few.

 

Not wanting kids doesn't make a man sad. Sad is thinking everyone should have kids.

Save the planet- have less, or even better, no children. 8 billion people are too many by about 5 billion and are destroying planet Earth as a habitat for humans and thousands of other species, IMO.

[freedomnow]

On 7/9/2023 at 3:58 AM, thaibeachlovers said:

Snap. I too went to NASA. Amazing place full of Thai kids drinking Johnny Walker.

Only went because a group of female colleagues from Saudi met up with me quite by chance in Bkk and wanted to go to a club. Just asked a taxi driver to take us to one and he went there.

 

https://bk.asia-city.com/nightlife/article/history-clubbing-bangkok

Nasa

(Ratchada)

Back before the new age restrictions were imposed by the government, the majority of clubbers were aged under 20. But NASA was designed to provide late-night entertainment for the 20-something crowd. The venue’s design took its cues from the space race to which it owed its name: a huge hangar complete with smoke machines, flashing lights and a sound system blasting dance hits. It was capable of packing in some 4,000 partiers a night.

I love all the those club history pages..but sad at same time.

Like milk, they all seem to have a expiry date not that long.

 

Anyway, back to balloon body retirees having epileptic viagra fits on 18-year-olds.

[freedomnow]

On 7/8/2023 at 3:54 PM, BangkokReady said:

So if a 60 year old is with a 30 year old (a significant age-gap), you would think he resembles a paedophile?

In case of Bob De Niro - he gets a free pass....seems to be 2 sets of opinion rules..one for stars/famous singers and one for plebs.

[JensenZ]

I had a situation where, when I visited Australia with my wife, my ex-gf (same age as me) found out my wife was the same age as her youngest daughter. To put it midly, she wasn't happy about it and had some choice words to say about it... nevermind that she had married an Australian and we were over a long time before. It didn't help that my wife has a babyface and looks younger than she is.

 

If you want to have a happy marriage with a (much) younger woman, best do it in Thailand or another SEA country where it is more acceptable.

[BangkokReady]

On 7/10/2023 at 9:14 AM, Yellowtail said:

Would you assume that the marriage to the first wife was because of sex life choices? 

 

I generally like your posts, but you seem a bit condescending here. 

 

I only married once, and I married because I wanted kids, not because I wanted to have sex. 

Obviously if you marry someone your own age, it's purely because of a deep emotional and spiritual connection and is nothing to do with sex, which is to be applauded.  However, if you marry someone 20-30 years your junior, there can be no possible emotional connection nor any other kind of non-sexual reciprocal care or pleasure, it can only be about "sex life choices", and it should be condemned and the man permanently shunned and cast-out of society.

 

Hopefully the sarcasm is obvious there.

 

It's a strange attitude.  I would have thought that if you're single, then your offspring wouldn't be so cruel and judgemental as to completely cut you out of their lives simply for finding happiness with a younger woman.  It is, after all, in no way damaging to them, with the exception of inheritance, which means they're annoyed because they're thinking about the money they get when you die, rather than the happiness you enjoy while you live.

 

The "sex-addict/sex-life choices" comments are a little odd.  They sound a lot like someone projecting their own issues onto someone else and shaming someone for their choices.

 

I guess they mean something like, you could have chosen a Thai wife your own age, and been part of your children's lives, but you chose a much younger Thai wife and they cut you out of their lives completely.  It kind of feels like they're looking for reasons why it isn't possible to have a much younger Thai wife.  Perhaps because they want that but feel they cannot have it, so they feel the need to police others?

[thaibeachlovers]

20 hours ago, JensenZ said:

I had a situation where, when I visited Australia with my wife, my ex-gf (same age as me) found out my wife was the same age as her youngest daughter. To put it midly, she wasn't happy about it and had some choice words to say about it... nevermind that she had married an Australian and we were over a long time before. It didn't help that my wife has a babyface and looks younger than she is.

 

If you want to have a happy marriage with a (much) younger woman, best do it in Thailand or another SEA country where it is more acceptable.

I hope you told the ex GF where to put her head. None of her business.

If she'd been a better GF you might have married her.

[OneMoreFarang]

On 7/7/2023 at 5:56 AM, Nemises said:

If she accepted it and your relationship with your daughter didn’t suffer, then good for you!
However, interested in hearing from those whose daughter’s did not approve. 
Still not talking with the daughter?

What about her children (the grandkids)? Miss not knowing them?

Did other family members take the side of your daughter?

And do you have any updates to this thread after 7 pages?

 

I have to admit I like interesting threads, but I don't like when the people who start it never return... 

[thaibeachlovers]

On 7/15/2023 at 10:11 PM, BangkokReady said:

Obviously if you marry someone your own age, it's purely because of a deep emotional and spiritual connection and is nothing to do with sex, which is to be applauded. 

When I was young, I think the main reason people got married was because the female got pregnant.

No pill then, and it was too embarrassing for a young guy to buy condoms in a chemist, which was the only place they were available.

NB cling film is not a reliable contraceptive, and the girl jumping up and down afterwards doesn't work.