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How would you describe heaven?


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A place with a beer volcano and a stripper factory...:whistling:

"The Pastafarian conception of Heaven includes a beer volcano and a stripper (or sometimes prostitute) factory. The Pastafarian Hell is similar, except that the beer is stale and the strippers have sexually transmitted diseases."
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There is a first hand account of what  Heaven is like.

 

The book of Enoch, written by Enoch describes his trip to Heaven at God's invitation.  Enoch, born 3,382BC  is the 7th generation from the first man Adam, and the Grandfather of Noah.  Enoch enjoyed his trip and requested to stay in Heaven, which was approved.

 

Youtube audio books has the Book of Enoch available and it about 4 hours long.

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1 hour ago, newbee2022 said:

I think everybody got different pictures when it comes to describe heaven. 

But most common is a society of peace and harmony without cold or heatwaves.🙏

In other words no atmosphere so nothing!

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8 hours ago, Mark Nothing said:

There is a first hand account of what  Heaven is like.

 

The book of Enoch, written by Enoch describes his trip to Heaven at God's invitation.  Enoch, born 3,382BC  is the 7th generation from the first man Adam, and the Grandfather of Noah.  Enoch enjoyed his trip and requested to stay in Heaven, which was approved.

 

Youtube audio books has the Book of Enoch available and it about 4 hours long.

Sooooo, if Enoch stayed in heaven, who wrote the story for us to read?

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I'll leave the traditional afterlife to others, since it's faith, and not logic, based, and hedonistic descriptions fall on the rock of " too much of a good thing", even the most exquisite experiences become boring after a while. I was, however, recently reading about the positive and negative effects of intense meditation, eerily similar to the the effects of psychedelics by the way, which I reckon is probably the closest we get to any kind of documented heaven here on earth, enlightenment and all that, and it quickly became obvious that one man's heaven is another man's hell. Personally, I think it's all very subjective, and a bit Yin and Yang'ish; you have a bad toothache and it's hell, it goes away, and you're in heaven for a moment; similarly, for a lot of Western guys, you're sex starved and in a sort of hell, you come to Thailand and think you've arrived in heaven, but once you become adapted to the ready availability, you revert to your normal state, whatever that might be.

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Just now, GammaGlobulin said:

Up there.

Up there...SOMEWHERE....

 

On second thought....

 

My view of heaven is....

 

DOWN THERE....

 

And, girls know what I mean when I say....

 

"down there".....

 

 

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I devoted the entire last chapter of my book, Jihadi: Path to Heaven, to giving my description of heaven.

It consists of six blank pages. In other words (or the absence of words), there's nothing there. :mellow:

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I don't believe in Heaven but, if I did, I'd like the angel Gabriel (the one with the horn) to say to me at the Pearly Gates:

 

"Hey, man! We've reserved a place for you in the heavenly Trumpet section. You're sitting between Satchmo and Dizzy Gillespie. Clifford Brown, Clark Terry and Roy Eldridge make up the rest of the line."

 

"What, No Miles Davis?"

 

"Nah, man. He p#ssed us all off. We sent him to the other place for being such a miserable motherf###er."

 

And you know what? I've never played a trumpet in my life BUT I opened right up on 'When The Saints Go Marching In'. The boys were impressed!

 

 

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5 hours ago, nausea said:

but once you become adapted to the ready availability, you revert to your normal state, whatever that might be.

Speak for yourself. My "normal state" was zero sex, and I certainly never willingly reverted to that situation.

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6 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

I would define Heaven as a state that never lasts too long, and therefore cannot be Eternal.

 

Before you were born, nothing but "etrnety" existed. You felt no discomfort whatsoever. After your demise we (you) will revert back to "non existance". Very comfortable. No worries.


"Non existance" is the best way of "existance". The eternal sleep. Same as before we were born.

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13 minutes ago, swissie said:

Before you were born, nothing but "etrnety" existed. You felt no discomfort whatsoever. After your demise we (you) will revert back to "non existance". Very comfortable. No worries.


"Non existance" is the best way of "existance". The eternal sleep. Same as before we were born.

 

For Eternity, surely....

 

At least, as I recall it, I was less stressed out, then....

And far happier...too....

If I were to be honest about it.

 

STILL:  On the other hand....IF I had not been born, then would I have ever heard The Brandenburg?

 

 

 

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