They smashed the gift that I gave. :(

[Purdey]

After decades of lending things to Thais I now no longer lend anything. Sometimes I will give and say I don't want it back. Sometimes I say I don't lend things at all.

Makes you feel more comfortable.

[Middle Aged Grouch]

Nothing new here as it is quite obvious that the Thais do not like farangs. The farang money for sure, but nothing more.

[BangkokReady]

10 hours ago, G_Money said:

Any stranger who befriends a child of mine without introducing themselves to me and being VETTED is going to raise the red flag.  
 

Google John Wayne Gacy.  A clown for the children, Mentor for teens looking for construction jobs,  honorable member of the Jaycee's with his photo taken with President Carter’s wife.

 

And then about 33 bodies of young men and teenagers buried in the crawl space beneath his home.

 

It sounds like John Wayne Gacy was vetted and approved of, so your whole argument pretty much falls apart instantly.

[steven100]

3 hours ago, FritsSikkink said:

Maybe because they didn't want a stranger getting involved with a 10 / 11 year old child.

 

this is more like the reason possibly ....   I lean toward the older farang buying the 11yr old a gift ....  and for what reason OP ?

[BangkokReady]

18 hours ago, rattlesnake said:

If it was his dad, then it could very well be a face thing. He never buys anything for his kid and a farang humiliates him in front of his friends? (This could be how he interpreted it). Mix heavy boozing with it and there you have it.

 

Making him look poor and a lousy father, in front of friends and family.  Like something out of a depression era novel.

[connda]

20 hours ago, JeffersLos said:

I went round to outside the kid's place and the grandmother brought out the smashed acoustic guitar, apparently the men smashed it up because it came from a farang, then left. The boy must be devastated. 

 

Did anybody else experience similar after giving a gift?

More like this.  The men were drunk, got angry at the kid because drunks get that way, and they smashed his guitar.
Buy him a new one.  I seriously doubt they "smashed it up because it came from a farang."
Or have his teacher keep it and he can practice where he learns. 

[connda]

18 hours ago, rattlesnake said:

If it was his dad, then it could very well be a face thing. He never buys anything for his kid and a farang humiliates him in front of his friends? (This could be how he interpreted it). Mix heavy boozing with it and there you have it.

I'd say there was a 110% chance that alcohol was involved.

[BangkokReady]

3 minutes ago, steven100 said:

and for what reason OP ?

 

If you guys can't see why an adult might want to do something nice for a probably deprived child who lives in his neighbourhood, that says more about you than about the OP.

[connda]

5 hours ago, ignore it said:

As funerals are rare

You don't live in my village.

[steven100]

4 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

 

If you guys can't see why an adult might want to do something nice for a probably deprived child who lives in his neighbourhood, that says more about you than about the OP.

 

unfortunately,  in this day and age you cannot just buddy up with an 11yr old and buy a guitar and whatever,  it doesn't work the way you insinuate that it's a gift to help a poorer kid, and your naive to think otherwise,  there are other more transparent ways to help which don't bring any suspicion.   There are too many conspicuous farang out there. 

[G_Money]

28 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

 

It sounds like John Wayne Gacy was vetted and approved of, so your whole argument pretty much falls apart instantly.

Wrong !

 

Not vetted with the teens parents.

 

For example.  If you tried that same stunt with a child of mine under the same circumstances.

 

Not only would I smash the guitar.  I would smash it over your head.

 

Your head would bleed INSTANTLY.

 

The fact you even stick up for Gacy tells me you’re a sick individual.

Edited July 25 by G_Money

[G_Money]

17 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

 

If you guys can't see why an adult might want to do something nice for a probably deprived child who lives in his neighbourhood, that says more about you than about the OP.

 

How about establishing a relationship with the parents first.

 

Otherwise you look like a groomer.

[metisdead]

A post with a derogatory trolling comment toward Thais contravening our Community Standards has been removed.  

[MalcolmB]

If this is a true story it is very rough on the poor kid.

Cruel.

[steven100]

22 minutes ago, MalcolmB said:

If this is a true story it is very rough on the poor kid.

Cruel.

 

rough yes ....  but you have to understand Thai's and how they think,  and to be honest ... this could have ended much worse if in the west.   

[JeffersLos]

This also happened when I bought my boyfriend a car. 

 

He smashed it into another car within 3 days. 

[steven100]

1 hour ago, BangkokReady said:

 

If you guys can't see why an adult might want to do something nice for a probably deprived child who lives in his neighbourhood, that says more about you than about the OP.

you are so wrong.   Yes, we can see he wants to help the poor kid but his approach is questionable and the reason for the unfortunate result.  

[BangkokReady]

1 minute ago, steven100 said:

you are so wrong.

 

In your opinion...

 

1 minute ago, steven100 said:

 Yes, we can see he wants to help the poor kid but his approach is questionable and the reason for the unfortunate result.  

 

This claim is questionable.  First, even if the OP had approached the mother and grandmother first and got their permission, it is likely that the drunken male family members would still have broken the guitar.  Second, predators often have no difficulty befriending the family members of their victims and appearing/becoming fully trusted.

 

You are so wrong.

[JeffersLos]

22 hours ago, JeffersLos said:

Long story short I bought him an acoustic guitar, I gave it to my guitar teacher and told him to give it to him and go round to his place twice a week and give me the bill.

 

After I said it to my guitar teacher, to check if he had time to give him lessons, he went and spoke to the mother, grandmother and aunt, and they all loved the idea, and they worked out the weekly lesson times. 

 

Then I bought the guitar and gave it to the teacher to give to the family. 

 

 

[BangkokReady]

22 minutes ago, JeffersLos said:

After I said it to my guitar teacher, to check if he had time to give him lessons, he went and spoke to the mother, grandmother and aunt, and they all loved the idea, and they worked out the weekly lesson times. 

 

Then I bought the guitar and gave it to the teacher to give to the family. 

 

I think most normal people would say that you did a wonderful thing.  Some people just choose to see the bad because of something bad inside them.

 

I'd be tempted to get another guitar, but maybe see if the teacher can keep it and take it there for the lessons.

[rocketboy2]

9 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

I'd be tempted to get another guitar, but maybe see if the teacher can keep it and take it there for the lessons.

 

Won't work, he needs the guitar all the time, or he will never progress.

 

[MalcolmB]

1 hour ago, JeffersLos said:

This also happened when I bought my boyfriend a car. 

 

He smashed it into another car within 3 days. 

Er I mean no offense

But a homosexual man buying a young male child something like that is always going to be perceived as a bit suss.

If you had a wife and kids, or even a girlfriend it probably would have been different.

 

 

[NoDisplayName]

23 hours ago, JeffersLos said:

I went round to outside the kid's place and the grandmother brought out the smashed acoustic guitar, apparently the men smashed it up because it came from a farang, then left. The boy must be devastated. 

 

Stay away.

 

You've got a combination of Thai male inferiority complex, Thai male group dynamics, and Thai male alcohol abuse.

 

They no likey foreigner, want to damage something that has value to you.  Lucky it was only the guitar that was smashed. 

 

Next time you might see the kid with a broken arm or the mother with a black eye and busted jaw.  If so, the rest of the family will blame you.

[NorthernRyland]

23 hours ago, JeffersLos said:

I went round to outside the kid's place and the grandmother brought out the smashed acoustic guitar, apparently the men smashed it up because it came from a farang, then left. The boy must be devastated. 

 

maybe they lost face, like you were raising their kids for them or something? seems crazy but I think Thai men can actually be that petty and jealous.

[GammaGlobulin]

2 hours ago, MalcolmB said:

If this is a true story it is very rough on the poor kid.

Cruel.

 

It's a fictional account of a story with a grain of truth.

 

[richard_smith237]

15 hours ago, G_Money said:

“Ask them directly why they did it, whether they plan to buy a replacement, and if not, if you can.”. 
 

LOL

 

1 or 2 things will most likely happen if the OP asks those questions.

 

1.  He may be starting a new thread “Beaten up by a Thai male or males.

 

2.  His second guitar purchase will be smashed again.  Possibly as he watches.

 

Don’t get involved anymore.  They’re not your friends.

 

 

Exactly this....     the Op has tried to offer a little community spirit and it appears that some in the area are simple racist...  Its an explanation that does not seem fabricated or exaggerated and fortunately its not behavior which is common - the poor young lad is simply unfortunate to have adults around him like this.

 

The Op has no choice but to move on - there is no point attempting to win this or aim for any for any resolution - he's overstepping his boundaries, albeit nicely so, nevertheless, his 'kindness' is an overstep.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Chris Daley]

Shame they didn't smash your guitar as well.  Let me guess, the same 3 chords over and over for hours.

[richard_smith237]

29 minutes ago, MalcolmB said:

1 hour ago, JeffersLos said:

This also happened when I bought my boyfriend a car. 

 

He smashed it into another car within 3 days. 

Er I mean no offense

But a homosexual man buying a young male child something like that is always going to be perceived as a bit suss.

If you had a wife and kids, or even a girlfriend it probably would have been different.

 

 

This brings new light to the story...  I agree with MalcomB's comment above... 

 

IF the men in the area know of Jeffer's sexual orientation they may very well be expressing a degree of protection... 

 

... Thats not to accuse Jeffer of grooming, but it could be a fair assumption that the men who smashed up the guitar are considering such a possibility and this is their way of ensuring distance...   If this is the case and the Op were to carry on 'being kind' there could be escalation. 

 

 

 

[billd766]

16 hours ago, steven100 said:

Doesn't really matter how or why it was smashed.

 

As others have mentioned,  it may be a loss of face thing from guys in the family. 

 

The point is, never get too buddy with Thai's and certainly never buy them a gift.  

 

TIT ... your story speaks volumes about how they act ....

 

 

 

To me, the story speaks more about the way some people, but not all people, act.

[JeffersLos]

37 minutes ago, MalcolmB said:

I mean no offense

But a homosexual man

 

I'm female.