Marrying a Thai Wife: Overrated or Underrated?

[blazes]

9 hours ago, KhunLA said:

Someone thinks too much.   Fantasy vs Reality ... who comes up with this stuff.

 

Take the word 'Thai' out.  It's a woman, hopefully, if that your preference.  No different than any other woman of the world.  

 

Same everywhere, emphasis on 'potentially' ... as all people aren't ...

... beautiful  (sounds a bit shallow)

... caring, good luck with that

... devoted, divorce rates not different 

... values family and home life  ???

 

More important, do you want to be married and or .... why ?

 

You're marrying the woman, not the family.   Why would you support anyone else ?  Is this something you do in home country ?

 

Cultural compatibly and the rest is just made up BS.  You're 2 people, you get along or you don't.  The rest is just BS excuses people use when things fail.   

 

Like all relationships, either works or doesn't, no need for excuses.  What makes you happy, what makes her happy, and if not like minded, it will fail.

 

Culture, language, other people have nothing to do with it.   The fantasy of marriage is a failed institution, and why so many fail.   

 

2 people finding out everything there is to know about each other and still liking each other .... 

 

GOOD LUCK WITH THAT ONE 

 

My advice ... if never wanting to be divorced, never get married.  That piece of paper is a fantasy, and for many, a curse.

 

this is a really comprehensive and sensible reply  to a question that can't really be answered. 

 

I would merely add that the whole "angle" from which the article is written wrongly assumes that it is the Thai pooying who must do all the changing, while the male gazing on can simply tick boxes as she conforms to this or that demand.  Recipe for failure when that is the starting point.

[blazes]

8 hours ago, sqwakvfr said:

I think a question a foreign man should ask  a Thai woman that he meets in LOS is this:

 

Have you ever been or lived in another country?

 

If she says yes then it there is a chance the two will be compatible.  In my first few years in CNX all the women I met had never been out of the country.  This was understandable because many can't afford it.   I met one lady who had lived in Singapore for a few years and one who had been to San Franscisco.  These were the only two that I felt compatible with.  For me if I am not compatible with a woman then there is no hope for a relationship.  

 

Strange concept of compatibility!

I was once on a dating site (in Canada) where you got to meet a dozen damsels and you had 3 minutes each to "get to know" the other person (she also had 3 minutes).  In preparation I asked myself what might be the most revealing (to me) answer that would give me some idea of who she "was" in 3 minutes.

That question was: where have you travelled outside of Canada? 

Out of the 12 women (mostly conventional middle-class types) I met, ONLY ONE  had been outside of Canada.   (And "outside" includes to our neighbour, the United States! --except Hawaii, natch..)

This was 20 years ago and maybe things have changed....

but, to turn it around, what does it show of me that I would judge a woman according to her global mileage?)

Back to LoS:  one can take it for granted that the vast majority of available women in LoS have not travelled very far, even within their own country, because they are all too poor to do what comes naturally to people like us (on this thread).

[richard_smith237]

28 minutes ago, atpeace said:

You're  comparing your relationship here to relationships back in the UK.  Don't partners in The UK share funds? I would bet there are many women that do get a salary/budget every month.  

 

So you came here at 22 and married a Thai.  First, 22 must have been a good time and wish I was here before my early thirties.   Most expats here make much more than their partners and as happens in the UK, end up supporting their partners.  Many of my friends fully support their wife back in the USA financially even though the wife is fully capable of working.  If you were the exception and didn't make more than your wife, then not supporting her makes complete sense.  If you made much more, like most here do, then not supporting her financially would be strange and selfish?  

 

Yes I am (comparing my relationship here to relationships back in the UK) because thats how it is... Thats also how it is for the vast majority of my friends here...   there isn't a great deal of difference from relationships in the West because we haven't dated poverty stricken females who are with us primarily for security...   (if that were so, my Wife would have left me already for a loaded owner of a a major shopping mall chain etc !!!)... 

 

The Wives of many of my friends could also have ended up with far weather Thai men....   They were just educated enough and independent enough to make choices based on genuine feelings, which aren't dependent on financial security - Of course, if we 'men' were pigheaded, bigoted, chauvinistic, misogynistic slobs we would not have got a look in...   

 

This whole idea seems hard for some to understand as they can only project from their own exposure which in reality is extremely limited...  or they may say something stupid such as "Give me a salt of the earth hard working gal over a pasty white snob any day"...   but in reality, thats just dumb defensiveness becasue they knew they never stood a chance in the first place, perhaps some guys are so out of touch with this reality they are simply blind to the reality outside of their own.

 

My relationship is by no means an exception - I meet foreigners every day who are in relationships with women and wives who were born into their own means, who's s are successful in their own right etc.

 

 

I think that when discussing such subjects, a lot of the narative on this forum is written by a very vocal number of people who are simply incapable of viewing life in Thailand beyond their own limited experiences... stuck within their own 'box' they just make things up to justify their situation or try and poke ridicule at situations they can't achieve...   

...  If they are only going to 'certain areas' - they will not be exposed to the others side....

 

If is of course difficult to discuss these issues evenly in such topics because reverse snobbery takes effect... 

... how many times have we read that someone is accused to lying if they state their significant other is an 'over-seas Masters educated Thai lady from a well off family'....   or they are accused of boasting or showing off while another posts they 'dragged their woman from the fields and put her through uni' etc...   the narrative becomes distorted, competitive almost... 

 

 

In reality;  cross cultural relationships between all aspects and 'strata' of society exist here...  and many of them are between successful couples - they myth that wealthy or women some may term as hi-so will not date a westerner is a complete myth (some wont, some will, just like women from any other strata of Thai society).

 

 

 

 

 

 

[SoCal1990]

Thank you all for your insightful replies, there’s plenty of food for thought here.

 

For those with Thai wives, how much do traditional beliefs like superstitions, old wives’ tales, and even fear of ghosts play a role in your relationship? Do they add charm and cultural richness, or do they sometimes create unexpected stress and challenges?

 

For instance, what if your wife insists on consulting a monk for help choosing lottery ticket numbers, deciding on travel dates, or making other big life choices? What happens if she even refuses to live somewhere because it’s “haunted,” or if she’s adamant about Feng Shui—rearranging furniture, doorways, or even entire houses to ensure good energy flow? If these beliefs don’t align with your own, then how can you navigate them respectfully while still balancing practicality and mutual understanding?

 

I wonder if these cultural quirks usually bring couples closer by fostering a sense of tradition and depth, or if they add strain to an already complex cross-cultural relationship. Curious to hear from others on their thoughts and experiences in this regard.

[khunPer]

10 hours ago, SoCal1990 said:

Marrying a Thai woman often sounds like a unique and appealing opportunity, but how can one know in advance what they’re really getting themselves into?

Isn't that a question in general when marrying, Thai or not...

[Hummin]

2 hours ago, rct99q said:

Actually the first thing one needs to do is ask oneself why you never married in your home country (US,UK, CAD,etc)? If you did, same rules apply here. If not, probably a good reason why a female/male in your home country did not accept. Here in Thailand money can compensate for your failures.

Why do you believe I have failures? You see everybody same as you? 

 

You just make stories in your head about other people that fits your narrative? 

[Hummin]

3 hours ago, richard_smith237 said:

 

I think this thread has turned into a circle jerk of those who's relationships have failed - its interesting that those who's relationships have failed show the greatest extent of misogynism...   given many of the comments its not surprising they remain alone, or in relationships where respect is lost, quite likely through their poor choice in the first place or erosion of respect in the first place... 

It is a lost conversation where they  trying to lower everyone down to their poor level. Sad really

[Gottfrid]

What? Marrying a Thai wife??? Are you stealing somebodies life companion? 😂

[parallelman]

Well if you '...marry a Thai wife...' aren't you off to bad start anyway? I mean why marry someoneone who is already '...a wife...'? 😆

[richard_smith237]

5 minutes ago, SoCal1990 said:

Thank you all for your insightful replies, there’s plenty of food for thought here.

 

For those with Thai wives, how much do traditional beliefs like superstitions, old wives’ tales, and even fear of ghosts play a role in your relationship? Do they add charm and cultural richness, or do they sometimes create unexpected stress and challenges?

 

Personal perspective: None...   I don't think an educated woman who's open minded is going to suffer the affliction of excessive 'superstitions'... but then there are events just as Loi Krathong and various other Thai and Buddhist traditions that may be included, but the same can be said of our Western traditions...    A meeting of cultures not adoption into another.

 

Wife has an unhealthy fear of gecko's and I quite like them - if we find one in our house its quite the scene, I sometimes think she might throw her 25000 baht phone at it rather that let it get as close as 2m from her !!! 

 

5 minutes ago, SoCal1990 said:

For instance, what if your wife insists on consulting a monk for help choosing lottery ticket numbers, deciding on travel dates, or making other big life choices? What happens if she even refuses to live somewhere because it’s “haunted,” or if she’s adamant about Feng Shui—rearranging furniture, doorways, or even entire houses to ensure good energy flow? If these beliefs don’t align with your own, then how can you navigate them respectfully while still balancing practicality and mutual understanding?

 

A couple of situations.  Mother In Law came to us with an 'ideal time and date' to place the ring (wedding)...  It was about 5am on a Friday morning. I just said no, its not going to happen - the wedding is going to be on Saturday xx when my family are over from the the UK....  MiL came back with...  OK 5:47am on Saturday xx... Again, I said no, I will not wake up that early and I don't want my Wife to wake up that early then spend all day and be absolutely exhausted by evening at the wedding party which she is supposed to enjoy. We will do the Ring Ceremony at 5pm, just before the wedding party... 

She saw another Monk with that Timing and that time as also auspicious !!! 

 

Another time - Wife was unwell and looking a little worse. I took her to hospital, her blood tests were not good.

It turns out she'd been taking some Chinese medicine her mother had given her !!!...  Mother in law got a bo!!ocking not to give my Wife anything...  Wife agreed and understood - none of that cr@p again.

 

House warming - I wanted no part of it. Wife did it while I was away from work. 

We don't have a spirt house - but we have a buddha positioned out of the way that my Wife puts garlands on from time to time.

 

 

5 minutes ago, SoCal1990 said:

I wonder if these cultural quirks usually bring couples closer by fostering a sense of tradition and depth, or if they add strain to an already complex cross-cultural relationship. Curious to hear from others on their thoughts and experiences in this regard.

 

Most 'cultural quirks' are insignificant and nothing worth bothering with... harmless differences in the way things are done.

When I do 'stand up' its my way, my Wife understands my logic processes... and if I'm very firm on something, there is a very strong reason and we can discuss it later. 

I've even said, even if its a a difference between what her parents expect and what I expect, she may not understand it, but I have a reason - I can explain that reason later, and it may not be something that matters now, but it could matter a few years from now. 

i.e. her parents are welcome any time, but they used to turn up out of the blue (when we were going out for dinner or two a friends place etc)... this would be awkward, as they thought we were rude for leaving, and we had to explain that we had plans already.....  sometimes we could not accomodate them....    they finally learned, just talk to us earlier, so a) they don't have a wasted trip across town, or b) we can include them in our plans...  So usually we bring them to us to which ever restaurant we are going, or they come over to our friends house with us, and this is the norm as others bring their in-laws over to our house when we are hosting - the parents have become good friends too !!!

 

 

 

 

 

[riclag]

10 hours ago, KhunLA said:

Someone thinks too much.   Fantasy vs Reality ... who comes up with this stuff.

 

Take the word 'Thai' out.  It's a woman, hopefully, if that your preference.  No different than any other woman of the world.  

 

Same everywhere, emphasis on 'potentially' ... as all people aren't ...

... beautiful  (sounds a bit shallow)

... caring, good luck with that

... devoted, divorce rates not different 

... values family and home life  ???

 

More important, do you want to be married and or .... why ?

 

You're marrying the woman, not the family.   Why would you support anyone else ?  Is this something you do in home country ?

 

Cultural compatibly and the rest is just made up BS.  You're 2 people, you get along or you don't.  The rest is just BS excuses people use when things fail.   

 

Like all relationships, either works or doesn't, no need for excuses.  What makes you happy, what makes her happy, and if not like minded, it will fail.

 

Culture, language, other people have nothing to do with it.   The fantasy of marriage is a failed institution, and why so many fail.   

 

2 people finding out everything there is to know about each other and still liking each other .... 

 

GOOD LUCK WITH THAT ONE 

 

My advice ... if never wanting to be divorced, never get married.  That piece of paper is a fantasy, and for many, a curse.

Good advice, KhunLA.

Also worth mentioning ,and this goes for everyone who enters matrimony here, spend as much as you can afford  to lose.

[riclag]

31 minutes ago, blazes said:

 

Strange concept of compatibility!

I was once on a dating site (in Canada) where you got to meet a dozen damsels and you had 3 minutes each to "get to know" the other person (she also had 3 minutes).  In preparation I asked myself what might be the most revealing (to me) answer that would give me some idea of who she "was" in 3 minutes.

That question was: where have you travelled outside of Canada? 

Out of the 12 women (mostly conventional middle-class types) I met, ONLY ONE  had been outside of Canada.   (And "outside" includes to our neighbour, the United States! --except Hawaii, natch..)

This was 20 years ago and maybe things have changed....

but, to turn it around, what does it show of me that I would judge a woman according to her global mileage?)

Back to LoS:  one can take it for granted that the vast majority of available women in LoS have not travelled very far, even within their own country, because they are all too poor to do what comes naturally to people like us (on this thread).

Well said!

 

[FritsSikkink]

8 hours ago, Hummin said:

We are paying her parents 10k to live on our farm when we are not here, and take care of animals. Total cost 20k a month and the farm make in return rougly 180k a year for the moment. Next years estimated to be 300k, which will cover maintanence and most of the expenses running the farm, and of course feeding from the live stock, fruit and vegetabels is not in calculation. 

So you lose money to have a farm.

[FritsSikkink]

8 hours ago, Hummin said:

We are paying her parents 10k to live on our farm when we are not here, and take care of animals. Total cost 20k a month and the farm make in return rougly 180k a year for the moment. Next years estimated to be 300k, which will cover maintanence and most of the expenses running the farm, and of course feeding from the live stock, fruit and vegetabels is not in calculation. 

So you lose money to have a farm.

[Albo]

11 hours ago, SoCal1990 said:

Marrying a Thai woman often sounds like a unique and appealing opportunity, but how can one know in advance what they’re really getting themselves into?

The idea of having a potentially beautiful, caring, and devoted wife who values family and home life is undoubtedly enticing. Add the cultural charm, great food, and warmth that many Thai women are known for, and it’s easy to see why many foreigners might be encouraged to take the plunge.

 

But is the reality as perfect as it seems? Financial expectations, for example, can be a major consideration. In many cases, marrying a Thai woman involves supporting her family to some extent. Is this considered a reasonable cultural norm, or does it often become an overwhelming burden on the husband over time? And how can foreigners navigate this expectation without running into relational challenges and a feeling of being fleeced?

 

Cultural compatibility is another question. The whole Thai cultural aspect that values harmony and “saving face” can sometimes lead to indirect communication. Does this help relationships by reducing unnecessary conflict, or does it cause frustration for someone from the West who is used to a more direct approach? And what about language barriers? How much do they limit deeper connections and understanding between two people when both partners might struggle to fully express themselves because of language?

 

Finally, there’s the lifestyle factor. Some thrive in cross-cultural marriages, embracing the blend of tradition and modernity that a Thai wife can bring. But others might find themselves struggling to bridge the gap between two very different ways of life.

So, is having a Thai wife everything it’s cracked up to be, or does it come with more challenges than would be expecting or find acceptable? For those already married or considering it, what other questions or concerns should weigh the most on one's mind before taking such a plunge?

 

She's just my wife. Being Thai has little to do with it. I married her specifically and wasn't shopping. We met, I knew she was it. Convinced her. Been together 15 years this month. She's been gold by and large. Never a shixty disposition, misplaced anger, money grabbing. Thai women are lovely, but I got lucky. I could have been happy with another woman from asean county and China, Japan possibly. I was spending 6 mo's here and 6 mo's in SEA. Stands the reason if I were going to bump into someone to marry it would be here. I do miss my freedom at times, but she (nor parents) are a burden.

 

Living in Indonesia married to ethnic Chinese might work, possibly Pinay, but not keen on those countries long term. Khmer women are lovely as well as Laotian. Burmese very charming. Yet, living in many of these countries not really feasible at least enjoying it.

[Albo]

9 hours ago, sqwakvfr said:

I think a question a foreign man should ask  a Thai woman that he meets in LOS is this:

 

Have you ever been or lived in another country?

 

If she says yes then it there is a chance the two will be compatible.  In my first few years in CNX all the women I met had never been out of the country.  This was understandable because many can't afford it.   I met one lady who had lived in Singapore for a few years and one who had been to San Franscisco.  These were the only two that I felt compatible with.  For me if I am not compatible with a woman then there is no hope for a relationship.  

 

Some men are not that dialed into Asian culture and that's fine. This never remotely entered my mind. My plan was to marry this Thai woman in her country and to live there with her. I really didn't need any preconditions outside of the obvious.

 

My wife had done a bit of traveling outside the country, loved to travel as her finances would allow. But certainly never lived outside the country. She can't even travel without a rice cooker now.

[thesetat2013]

8 hours ago, Hummin said:

We are paying her parents 10k to live on our farm when we are not here, and take care of animals. Total cost 20k a month and the farm make in return rougly 180k a year for the moment. Next years estimated to be 300k, which will cover maintanence and most of the expenses running the farm, and of course feeding from the live stock, fruit and vegetabels is not in calculation. 

forgot about what is used for our farm. We have palm oil trees for our farm but we do not live in our home there for a couple years already.. The Thai mother takes care of the farm. We allotted her a couple rai to use for her personal farming use. Veggies and spices mostly with some fruit. The Thai family never ask us for money and the mother makes sure workers take care of our trees. we collect the money from the palm oil seeds about every 3 months and have never been asked for any of it. We know the prices and what money should be there waiting us and they have never taken any money either. I think when it comes to family.

 

If you plan to marry a poor Isaan woman with an even poorer family. They will not only take all of your sinsod but your new wife will make sure she is sending them as much money as possible. If you marry into a family that is not so poor. They want you to make sure the wife has a good life and the kids you make together. So if you are considering marrying a Thai, you need to think about this also. 

 

I got lucky in finding my wife. The family gave us the family house and all the land divided by 3 siblings... They returned all sinsod under our bed on the wedding night. They never ask for anything from us unless it is something important that they can not get themselves. Any bills for medical are split between all the siblings that their insurance does not pay. They are self supporting and very proud of this. They do not like their daughter married a foreigner but they are happy she is happy with a good family that has all they need and want. They acknowledge me but language is a barrier we can not seem to get past. 

[BigStar]

1 hour ago, atpeace said:

Many of my friends fully support their wife back in the USA financially even though the wife is fully capable of working. 

 

Yep. Friend of mine not only financially supports his wife (and fat, tattooed goth daughters) but cleans the house (vacuuming and taking care of the cat box), does all the yard work, and does all the gardening so she can pick fresh veggies. He also cooks, but she does some of that when in the mood. Yes, he's (or was) a staunch Kamala supporter.

 

Whenever I visit, I'm so glad to leave. Depressing.

 

 

[sqwakvfr]

59 minutes ago, blazes said:

 

Strange concept of compatibility!

I was once on a dating site (in Canada) where you got to meet a dozen damsels and you had 3 minutes each to "get to know" the other person (she also had 3 minutes).  In preparation I asked myself what might be the most revealing (to me) answer that would give me some idea of who she "was" in 3 minutes.

That question was: where have you travelled outside of Canada? 

Out of the 12 women (mostly conventional middle-class types) I met, ONLY ONE  had been outside of Canada.   (And "outside" includes to our neighbour, the United States! --except Hawaii, natch..)

This was 20 years ago and maybe things have changed....

but, to turn it around, what does it show of me that I would judge a woman according to her global mileage?)

Back to LoS:  one can take it for granted that the vast majority of available women in LoS have not travelled very far, even within their own country, because they are all too poor to do what comes naturally to people like us (on this thread).

Understanding someone who can only see things the Thai way is mission impossible. At least women in Canada and the US have been exposed to people from different cutures and beliefs from many parts of the world.  I am of Asisan descent most Thai women only believe I can only be Chinese, Japanese or Korean. When I state that I am from the United States the response is "not possible, you lie".  This would be my version of not being compatible. 

 

Actually seeing an Asian American could have started the road to compatibility but unless one actually meets such a person then many would not believe it.  

[riclag]

Make sure if you do jump the palm branch , she has a family that doesn’t have expectations of wealth and grandeur.

 

Simple , honest , caring woman who appreciates you as a friend and a lover!

If they have children try to be kind and caring, it goes a long way towards  a happy relationship.

I have money and I don’t mind sharing some of it with my Thai family as long as it’s respectful and a good cause!

Mai bien kee neow(don’t be cheap).

[sqwakvfr]

4 minutes ago, Albo said:

 

Some men are not that dialed into Asian culture and that's fine. This never remotely entered my mind. My plan was to marry this Thai woman in her country and to live there with her. I really didn't need any preconditions outside of the obvious.

 

My wife had done a bit of traveling outside the country, loved to travel as her finances would allow. But certainly never lived outside the country. She can't even travel without a rice cooker now.

I would say you are lucky to have found such a woman. 

[freedomnow]

8 hours ago, BritManToo said:

I pay my MIL 3,000bht a month NOT to live with us.

If she comes to visit -100bht for every day here.

Result ....... not seen her for 2 years .... well worth the money ..... so much for close family bonds!

 

I don't really interact with her family or friends, they pass through but a wai from them and a wave back from me is about it. I don't let her mix with my pals either.

Sounds like a cook and cleaner you have there rather than a wife.

[Albo]

7 minutes ago, sqwakvfr said:

I would say you are lucky to have found such a woman. 

 

Thx. Most people I meet say the same. She's naturally a genuinely happy person. Wish she was more girly.

 

The fish last night was incredibly stinky. Makes mackerel and pah-la smell like perfume. Time around she bought half a freezer full.

 

Pro tip: good relationship with parents, no debt, ambitious within Thai limits. You both share interests***

[riclag]

1 minute ago, freedomnow said:

Sounds like a cook and cleaner you have there rather than a wife.

Many Thai woman enjoy the role!

 

My wife was brought up or has the feeling of necessity , obsession ,to clean & cook, especially the cleaning.

Some wives are known to even lay out 

the husbands clothes for the day!

Take care , take care!

[Lacessit]

My GF and I are always taken to be man and wife. Married once, no desire to repeat.

 

She is well provided for when I die.

 

IMO the reason Thai women are attractive is that they have retained their femininity.

[Albo]

11 minutes ago, sqwakvfr said:

Understanding someone who can only see things the Thai way is mission impossible. At least women in Canada and the US have been exposed to people from different cutures and beliefs from many parts of the world.  I am of Asisan descent most Thai women only believe I can only be Chinese, Japanese or Korean. When I state that I am from the United States the response is "not possible, you lie".  This would be my version of not being compatible. 

 

Thai people are not especially flexible when it comes to creature comforts, food, etc. if we lived in the United States I would be eating rice 6 days a week same. We would go out for steak or sushi or nothing, same. My wife would not be eating any more Western food in the states as she does here which is next to none. If you want an Asian woman that enjoys or at least eats Western food you're really going to have to go to Philippines for that. I think that many East Asian countries eat more Western food certainly more bread than Thais. Viet, Cambo, Myanmar, Lao don't really count because lacking development

[Albo]

6 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

My GF and I are always taken to be man and wife.

 

Maybe, maybe not

 

I always presume mixed couples are not married unless I can just tell by their mannerisms that they have been together forever and are married.

[Lacessit]

4 minutes ago, Albo said:

 

Maybe, maybe not

 

I always presume mixed couples are not married unless I can just tell by their mannerisms that they have been together forever and are married.

Not forever, 12 good years.

[richard_smith237]

12 minutes ago, Albo said:

19 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

My GF and I are always taken to be man and wife.

 

Maybe, maybe not

 

I always presume mixed couples are not married unless I can just tell by their mannerisms that they have been together forever and are married.

 

You may not have been here long enough to identify the 'normal behavior'....

 

Thais are adept at it...  Foreigners who spent time at here are adept at it...      Spotting the following relationships..

 

- Monger + Ho (stick out like a sore thumb and look quite out of place in a normal setting)

- Foreigner + Occupational Farang hunter (stands out - she's over selling her status)

- Foreigner + Regular Woman (also obvious because they look so normal together).

 

Obviously there are lots between those and the 'spectrum is far more faceted'...   but those are the basics and newbies may struggle to tell one from the other.

[sqwakvfr]

19 minutes ago, Albo said:

 

Thai people are not especially flexible when it comes to creature comforts, food, etc. if we lived in the United States I would be eating rice 6 days a week same. We would go out for steak or sushi or nothing, same. My wife would not be eating any more Western food in the states as she does here which is next to none. If you want an Asian woman that enjoys or at least eats Western food you're really going to have to go to Philippines for that. I think that many East Asian countries eat more Western food certainly more bread than Thais. Viet, Cambo, Myanmar, Lao don't really count because lacking development

Not just flexible  but unimforned and stubborn.  I have been going to the same coffee place in CNX for five years.  The Thai lady makes great coffee and is very nice. To this day she still thinks I am Japanese because I am Asian.  I have stopped telliing her that I am American.  Whenever I am not at her place for a stretch she usually asks me "you go to Japan?".  I tell her I was in Los Angeles but I doubt she believes me.  All I want is to get my coffee and get along with her. I pay, leave a tip, smile and leave until next time.  This represents my experience as an Asian American in the Land of Smiles.  Purusing a relationship of anykind with a Thai woman(especially in Chiang Mai) is no longer  in the plans.  Maybe I will try a bar girl next?