Have I Ruined It For Myself

[Pundi64]

Nope sounds pretty hopeless to me

[ding]

This is the absolute best attention-whore thread I HAVE EVER SEEN.!!!

May it never end....

[richard10365]

(in between this, there are also many, many one nighters, most paid, some not)

Does this mean you paid for most? If this is how you usually talk a woman into going home with you then this might be the source of your problem.

[tuky]

I bet you won't make the claim that all the farang MALE friends you have...they are ALL intelligent, smart, funny, AND sexy!

ACTUALLY James, they ARE

and its not about me being choosy/fussy. I dont choose my friends based on any of these characteristics. you simply learn to appreciate different aspects of your friends and realise that they have these traits within them, even when it might not be apparent to a casual/superficial observer

but this is besides the point of this thread aint it

Ill give the floor back to the OP and others now

all my friends are goodlooking....well I certainly think so anyway

Are you saying we are not friends?

[thomo]

Is there hope for me to mend my ways and become "normal" again?

Relax, you're perfectly normal. We're all ######ing a different wet dream asian girl on a nightly basis, why would we want to settle down?

[Suszzy]

Is there hope for me to mend my ways and become "normal" again?

what's normal and what's not?

do whatever you want to do guy.

it's your life..after all.

[FarangNoi21]

I don't mean normal in the western world sense, like grovelling after overweight, solemn women at discos, but as in sticking with one women and building a solid relationship.

So what you are saying is that you can't get beautiful women in first world countries?

[onzestan]

Is there hope for me to mend my ways and become "normal" again?

What you are doing is "normal" for a male homo sapien according to the laws of evolutionary biology. What you think is normal is just a social construct...a framework put in place by elites to control the breeding behavior of the poor males and female masses.

so don't sweat it and enjoy your evolutionary freedom

Finally, a sensible answer.

No that's not only sensible, but exactly what you wanted to hear.

cheers

onzestan

[dumspero]

Can it really be that if somebody posts on TV about having a lot of women that it's considered bragging? I can't believe that. It would be like if a person said they eat every day or something. We all know that anyone can have as much sex with as many people as we want, so how can it be bragging?

I sympathize with the OP and suspect many of us do.

And kind of harsh for those who are posting his earlier post about having found someone. Isn't that just part of what he's pondering, the sex is great but he's wondering if something is missing and if he can stick with that one special person?

Or is TV really just for the PC crowd and mod-lead mob attacks on posters like these? I have no problem with you who have one Thai spouse, live a quiet life, etc--- but geesh, isn't the TV tent big enough for a little diversity of thought and lifestyle?

[FarangNoi21]

yeah, that is the age old question "should i stop sleeping with prostitutes, learn to chew with my mouth closed, start bathing, and get a real girlfriend???"... hopefully more people can respond with some advice for OP.

[JimsKnight]

After many years in SE Asia "dating" 100's of the best looking women in the world, I know I would find it almost impossible to settle down in a relationship with just one woman for the rest of my life.

I've had truly wonderful gf's, almost perfect, well educated, good looking etc etc, but after a year or less I'm out there looking again. (in between this, there are also many, many one nighters, most paid, some not)

Is there hope for me to mend my ways and become "normal" again?

I don't mean normal in the western world sense, like grovelling after overweight, solemn women at discos, but as in sticking with one women and building a solid relationship.

Mend your ways? Start acting like a man and not a defeated one and you may see improvements!

If you want to play the wandering womaniser then you've got to understant it's not conducive to suddenly settling down and building a relationship with just one chick.

You have to understand, you are no longer in the West, in Asia as a rule promiscuity and polygamy are ingrained into the culture, somehow this also rubs off on westerners living here.

I know many dudes in the UK that would 'kill' to have the expat lifestyle we have here. I certainly know a life-time of house repayments, life-time commitment to kids wouldn't exactly be my groove in life.

Theres a few good looking and decent catches out there, but they are usually not 18 - 25 year old babes who want to suddenly be marrying/settling down with a farang, unless you like baggage and grief.

I also know a few expats who have practically been 'castrated' into domestic servitude by their thai wives; they have all the assets and the farang better watch out! Otherwise in come four of the relatives to come and bundle you out the door!

I think SE Asia is not the best place to find the dream marriage or commital on equal terms I think you are looking for. Best try Europe for that. The deck is stacked in the home-sides favour...

However, it's unclear by 'normal' what you're after? If you can afford it then maybe what you need is a mia noi or paid mistress who works but is yours. This is Thai style though and whether you consider it 'normal' is your call.

Be careful what you wish for Duch.

Edited October 19, 2007 by JimsKnight

[MiG16]

I bet you won't make the claim that all the farang MALE friends you have...they are ALL intelligent, smart, funny, AND sexy!

I'd like to think so, I'm one of them!

you got it in one Rob

all my friends are goodlooking....well I certainly think so anyway

Are you saying we are not friends?

you fishing for compliments again? both of you are one of them goodlooking, smart, intelligent AND "SEXY" ones amongst my friends there I said it sheesh

[garro]

Sorry but I just don't understand why the OP feels the need to ask a group of complete strangers about who he should or shouldn't sleep with. But I'll give my opinion away.

Many people (especially men it seems) enjoy sleeping around through their late teens and early twenties.

I think almost anybody can sleep with hundreds of people, it's not exactly brain surgery.

There are plenty of desperate and lonely people with no self-respect out there and some of them are quite attractive.

I was no slouch in this myself but after a few years realised that it felt a bit pointless and meaningless.

The real fun could be found in relationshps.

Other people continue to sleep around into middle-age and beyond.

To me it seems a bit of a shallow existence and it would make me suspect that there was something wrong with them.

Maybe some abuse or something else from their past. It often goes hand in hand with alcohol abuse.

Some people may really enjoy it.

Up to them.

In regards to the OP question.

How would I know?

I don't know you from Adam.

If you do get a Thai girlfriend though.

Don't feel that you need to convince others that she is not a prostitute.

Don't feel that you have to constantly tell people that she is a good girl from a good family and never been touched.

That's your business.

[villagefarang]

It is only normal to question the sustainability of ones lifestyle. Whether it be sex or sports or whatever, you wonder how long you can maintain the same level. Especially when you are riding a wave. Life is cyclical. You can't stay awake forever. You can't maintain a orgasm forever. Things have a natural rhythm to them.

That said, you have made it more difficult for yourself. Always looking for something a little bit better than the last one. You have raised you level of expectation to a point that it gets more difficult to satisfy your ever increasing expectations.

You may one day find someone who makes your life fuller and richer. Someone who doesn't make you feel like you are sacrificing or giving up something. Someone with whom your life is better with her than without her and you will do what it takes to maintain that relationship and not hurt the one you love.

If that doesn't happen then I would suggest continuing what you are doing. It wouldn't be productive to force yourself into a box that doesn't fit or to hurt or deceive someone you might care about.

I wouldn't worry too much about what the twits on this forum say either. Many seem to have a very big chip on their shoulder.

[TAWP]

The OP had to pay to get beautiful woman, haha! Hardly much of a success there...

[JimsKnight]

Sorry but I just don't understand why the OP feels the need to ask a group of complete strangers about who he should or shouldn't sleep with. But I'll give my opinion away.

Many people (especially men it seems) enjoy sleeping around through their late teens and early twenties.

I think almost anybody can sleep with hundreds of people, it's not exactly brain surgery.

There are plenty of desperate and lonely people with no self-respect out there and some of them are quite attractive.

I was no slouch in this myself but after a few years realised that it felt a bit pointless and meaningless.

The real fun could be found in relationshps.

Other people continue to sleep around into middle-age and beyond.

To me it seems a bit of a shallow existence and it would make me suspect that there was something wrong with them.

Maybe some abuse or something else from their past. It often goes hand in hand with alcohol abuse.

Some people may really enjoy it.

Up to them.

In regards to the OP question.

How would I know?

I don't know you from Adam.

If you do get a Thai girlfriend though.

Don't feel that you need to convince others that she is not a prostitute.

Don't feel that you have to constantly tell people that she is a good girl from a good family and never been touched.

That's your business.

Thats a new one on me Garro! 'Expat who has sex, is single and is in middle age is abusing themselves'. Jeez I'd better check myself into 'Sugar Daddies Anonymous' pronto

I'll go see a shrink while I'm there too!

Careful Garro, you're beginning to sound like the voice of the Thailand Temperance Movement!

I think you need to understand that people like yourself and others on TV may wish to settle down etc. But not everyone (yours truly included) desires to do this. Some of us (whether we admit it or not) are biologically and mentally unsuited to being monogomous. If we marry and settle down, it's gonna just be causing long-term aggro and stress in the relationship. Better to be honest and quit pretending everyones suited to house and kids.

Some of us desire our freedom and space too much to sacrifice, especially in a country where we would have few rights as husbands that a thai man would have.

Some of us want to move and travel and do our own thing in life.

Wife and kids are a good thing though, but they ain't for everyone! And the sooner people realise it the better.

Also lets be honest, I think as a single farang you have to be at least slightly selfish sometimes to surive out here and make your money last, otherwise the first chick who wants to hustle you will have you at Suvarn. before you know it.

I can recall a time when there would be many single men on TV (that would post) and could talk the talk of being single. The dearth of this on TV is to be much lamented.

OT Too few single guys post on the ways of singletons or to tell it like it is and post on TV.

There are way too many dudes on TV putting down the single folk for my liking.

Maybe it's some guilt trip 90s crap that somehow has worked it's way into the psyche?

[villagefarang]

The OP had to pay to get beautiful woman, haha! Hardly much of a success there...

Don't fool yourself! We all pay one way or another. We are on the demand side of the equation and they are on the supply side.

[Thaddeus]

you fishing for compliments again? both of you are one of them goodlooking, smart, intelligent AND "SEXY" ones amongst my friends there I said it sheesh

Now I'm feeling neglected......

[garro]

Sorry but I just don't understand why the OP feels the need to ask a group of complete strangers about who he should or shouldn't sleep with. But I'll give my opinion away.

Many people (especially men it seems) enjoy sleeping around through their late teens and early twenties.

I think almost anybody can sleep with hundreds of people, it's not exactly brain surgery.

There are plenty of desperate and lonely people with no self-respect out there and some of them are quite attractive.

I was no slouch in this myself but after a few years realised that it felt a bit pointless and meaningless.

The real fun could be found in relationshps.

Other people continue to sleep around into middle-age and beyond.

To me it seems a bit of a shallow existence and it would make me suspect that there was something wrong with them.

Maybe some abuse or something else from their past. It often goes hand in hand with alcohol abuse.

Some people may really enjoy it.

Up to them.

In regards to the OP question.

How would I know?

I don't know you from Adam.

If you do get a Thai girlfriend though.

Don't feel that you need to convince others that she is not a prostitute.

Don't feel that you have to constantly tell people that she is a good girl from a good family and never been touched.

That's your business.

Thats a new one on me Garro! 'Expat who has sex, is single and is in middle age is abusing themselves'. Jeez I'd better check myself into 'Sugar Daddies Anonymous' pronto

I'll go see a shrink while I'm there too!

Careful Garro, you're beginning to sound like the voice of the Thailand Temperance Movement!

I think you need to understand that people like yourself and others on TV may wish to settle down etc. But not everyone (yours truly included) desires to do this. Some of us (whether we admit it or not) are biologically and mentally unsuited to being monogomous. If we marry and settle down, it's gonna just be causing long-term aggro and stress in the relationship. Better to be honest and quit pretending everyones suited to house and kids.

Some of us desire our freedom and space too much to sacrifice, especially in a country where we would have few rights as husbands that a thai man would have.

Some of us want to move and travel and do our own thing in life.

Wife and kids are a good thing though, but they ain't for everyone! And the sooner people realise it the better.

Also lets be honest, I think as a single farang you have to be at least slightly selfish sometimes to surive out here and make your money last, otherwise the first chick who wants to hustle you will have you at Suvarn. before you know it.

I can recall a time when there would be many single men on TV (that would post) and could talk the talk of being single. The dearth of this on TV is to be much lamented.

OT Too few single guys post on the ways of singletons or to tell it like it is and post on TV.

There are way too many dudes on TV putting down the single folk for my liking.

Maybe it's some guilt trip 90s crap that somehow has worked it's way into the psyche?

Jimsknight,

I did say that some people seem to enjoy it, and it is up to them.

I just gave my opinion. Doesn't mean I'm right.

It's not like the OP's need to stick his nob into x number of strangers is going to effect me.

[MiG16]

you fishing for compliments again? both of you are one of them goodlooking, smart, intelligent AND "SEXY" ones amongst my friends there I said it sheesh

Now I'm feeling neglected......

ohmygosh what did I get myself into

go back read my original post....ALL my friends...male and female are smart, goodlooking, and SEXY

now who else wanna sign up as my friend bring chocolates and Im yours yep Im cheap

[TAWP]

The OP had to pay to get beautiful woman, haha! Hardly much of a success there...

Don't fool yourself! We all pay one way or another. We are on the demand side of the equation and they are on the supply side.

That is what you think or is lead to believe. It's not true for all men.

[villagefarang]

The OP had to pay to get beautiful woman, haha! Hardly much of a success there...

Don't fool yourself! We all pay one way or another. We are on the demand side of the equation and they are on the supply side.

That is what you think or is lead to believe. It's not true for all men.

I don't believe it. Another guy implying he gets it for free and doesn't "pay" anything.

There is a lot more to the economics of relationships than money. In relationships there is a give and take. People just don't do things if there isn't a "payoff" of some sort.

[meemiathai]

Can it really be that if somebody posts on TV about having a lot of women that it's considered bragging? I can't believe that. It would be like if a person said they eat every day or something. We all know that anyone can have as much sex with as many people as we want, so how can it be bragging?

I sympathize with the OP and suspect many of us do.

And kind of harsh for those who are posting his earlier post about having found someone. Isn't that just part of what he's pondering, the sex is great but he's wondering if something is missing and if he can stick with that one special person?

Or is TV really just for the PC crowd and mod-lead mob attacks on posters like these? I have no problem with you who have one Thai spouse, live a quiet life, etc--- but geesh, isn't the TV tent big enough for a little diversity of thought and lifestyle?

Thanks for the good post!

Most people aren't aware of reality! Look around and see how many prostitutes there are and you will realize how many men are involved.

Those who speak out are just those who cannot stand hypocrisy and want to be honest.

To the OP, I understand what you are talking about, I do not think there is a solution.

[TAWP]

The OP had to pay to get beautiful woman, haha! Hardly much of a success there...

Don't fool yourself! We all pay one way or another. We are on the demand side of the equation and they are on the supply side.

That is what you think or is lead to believe. It's not true for all men.

I don't believe it. Another guy implying he gets it for free and doesn't "pay" anything.

There is a lot more to the economics of relationships than money. In relationships there is a give and take. People just don't do things if there isn't a "payoff" of some sort.

I don't believe it. Another guy implying that woman always want money or favours and that guys always have to hand them out.

Or are you saying that only the things the man gives have any 'value', hence giving this slanted view of the reality?

If the woman pays and the man gives love instead...is the man still paying? Can the man ever be 'not paying'?

Besides, this thread is about paying, as in money, for womans company.

I still laugh at the OP.

[Dustoff]

We may need a much bigger boat for this fishing trip!

Altho I think that, given the subject matter, we should try to avoid catching anything..

The cynic in me wants to tell the OP, short of choosing and prostrating himself to one of the many religious superstitions, to have his penis surgically removed and stored for reconnection whenever he has created sufficient blood to supply it and his brain at the same time.

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that it may be his brain that is weak - anyone who can create such a successful troll thread has to have something going for him - but it seems that since he pays for sex and doesn't have these whoardes of women chasing him down the street with offers of either free sex or money (as I do), there may be something more limp in his life than the prospect of a meaningful relationship.

Gotta admit, being fully loaded with male whoremones, I would likely have been a better man without that one-eyed monster hanging around. Scoring was never my gig tho, nor necessary, and I was more into really liking women and seeking partnerships and companionship and I found 'one-night stands' meaningless (had one, didn't like it, felt degraded, sought therapy). During a couple of long journeys around Merka with my Thai wife, she repeatedly exclaimed, "Wow Ken, you sure know a LOT of cool women!" Yeah, I do. And looking forward to meeting more.

Anyway, not that the OP is really interested in 'gettin right with normality' but I didn't find "the one" until sixty years of age so I would suggest that you take your time, dude. Just remember to treat them all with respect and compassion or suffer the consequences of lifelong mediocrity.

Ah, what a great thread! I haven't had this much fun since I performed an accidental self-circumcision with my motorcycle boots while not being aware of what I was stepping on...

[xyborg]

<br />

Is there hope for me to mend my ways and become "normal" again?

<br /><br />What you are doing is "normal" for a male homo sapien according to the laws of evolutionary biology. What you think is normal is just a social construct...a framework put in place by elites to control the breeding behavior of the poor males and female masses. <br /><br />so don't sweat it and enjoy your evolutionary freedom <img src="style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="" border="0" alt="laugh.gif" /><br />

<br />------------------<br />I'm not sure what "normal" is anymore... <br /><br />

<br /><br /><br />

Everyone thinks they are normal is what normal is.

[Dustoff]

Everyone thinks they are normal is what normal is.

Yikes..

Painfully profound..

[sibeymai]

Dear OP,

I wouldn't worry about it.

What you and many other western males experience in south east Asia is just what it used to be like in our own countries way back before religion and morality were combined to control otherwise normal people. The end result is millions of frustrated people unable to live normal lives due to artificially imposed restrictions on people's freedoms and lifestyle.

Enjoy it while you can.

[Payboy]

The OP had to pay to get beautiful woman, haha! Hardly much of a success there...

Don't fool yourself! We all pay one way or another. We are on the demand side of the equation and they are on the supply side.

but i bet the op pays way less than the rest of us.... being so good as to reject women available back home and all....

[cashe]

I think when you say relationship there's love involve and love is about picking one person and making it work. If you can't pick one person, or you just wanted a whole lot of women in your bed, then it is not love nor can be called a relationship.

With all that said, YES! you have ruined it for yourself.