Foreign Husbands Speaking Thai To Their Kids

[isabelle17]

If I had kids and if I could speak better Thai, I would speak both Thai and English to them. Probably primarily English, just because it is my native English, but if I wanted to throw some Thai in there, why not??

Everyone has their own opinion to this obviously, and if the child is capable of handling the two (or 3 or more) languages, then all the more power to him/her! I speak Chinese, so if I ever have kids, I am also going to try and teach them some Chinese at an early age, even though I am not from China at all! It's a big big world out there, and the more languages one can speak, the better off they are. Times are changing, and if a parent wants to teach their kid a language other than their own native language, and if the kid seems okay with that, then why not? I wish I was taught more languages when I was young.

Edited April 21, 2008 by isabelle17

[JetsetBkk]

Over the last couple of days here in Phuket, I've seen a few foreign husbands speaking Thai to their kids. I really don't see any reason for this as they should be speaking to them in their mother tongue so the kids can be bilingual.

How do you know the farang fathers don't speak English to their kids at other times? For example, when they are at home and the father can explain in detail exactly how to say something in English.

[nidge]

Imagine this scenario...

Mother, (Thai), father, (English), and son all having a conversation. Following the OP's logic the mother has to speak in Thai, the father in English. So what language should the son reply in?

I speak both English and Thai to my son as does his mother. I guess it is adversely affecting him as he only seems to reply "da da da da" or something similar. Perhaps we should all try learning Spanish and stick to that instead.

[Bredbury Blue]

I speak to my 5 & 3 year olds in English (they already laugh at my crap thai) and the wife speaks to them in English or Thai and SHOUTS AT THEM IN ESAN!!!

The wife is very critical of thai wifes with luuk khrung who do not speak to their kids in thai but only in english.

[tijnebijn]

I speak mostly Thai to my kids , sometimes in English .

My native tongue is Dutch , and I don't think they need Dutch language skills .

My Thai isn't perfect , as is my English , but both are good enough .

I do think that people who grew up with an English tongue , probably weigh their language heavier

then non English tongue foreigners , cause its not a worldly language at all , and perhaps think 3 languages

is just too much for those kids ( even when some say it isn't ) , but I do think its too much .

Why I speak Thai with my kids ? Cause I think its more important to learn and speak Thai ,

like a foreigner should do in our own home countries too ?

My children need the Thai language skills much more then my own language where we never

go and never intend for going , so what they need it for ( except for some easy words ) ?

But I do think English , even when it is not my own native language , is a very different story ,

and I do think its important to be skilled in that .

[ajannick]

May be the child needs more practice in Thai?

Who knows but I have no problem with a parent speaking English and Thai, Just Thai, Just English etc etc...

Up to you!

[garro]

I speak mostly Thai to my kids , sometimes in English .

My native tongue is Dutch , and I don't think they need Dutch language skills .

My Thai isn't perfect , as is my English , but both are good enough .

I do think that people who grew up with an English tongue , probably weigh their language heavier

then non English tongue foreigners , cause its not a worldly language at all , and perhaps think 3 languages

is just too much for those kids ( even when some say it isn't ) , but I do think its too much .

Why I speak Thai with my kids ? Cause I think its more important to learn and speak Thai ,

like a foreigner should do in our own home countries too ?

My children need the Thai language skills much more then my own language where we never

go and never intend for going , so what they need it for ( except for some easy words ) ?

But I do think English , even when it is not my own native language , is a very different story ,

and I do think its important to be skilled in that .

Good points tijnebijn, but does your family in Holland not complain that they can't speak to your child in Dutch - I am assuming that you still have family there. I know my family would be a bit upset if they couldn't communicate with my son. Mind you - we are still working on 'ba-ba' at the moment.

[soundman]

Something else to bear in mind with younger children, is that they will naturally learn Thai with a greater amount of comprehension they will English.

So if a situation requiring urgency, such as the child running across the road while cars are coming, I am going to yell out in Thai every time so there is no hesitation in the message I am trying to get accross to my child.

Cheers,

Soundman.

[onzestan]

Good points tijnebijn, but does your family in Holland not complain that they can't speak to your child in Dutch - I am assuming that you still have family there. I know my family would be a bit upset if they couldn't communicate with my son. Mind you - we are still working on 'ba-ba' at the moment.

Why would that be Garro?

You immediately assume that Tijnebijns family has no language skills.

I believe Tijnebijn to be Dutch, and I'm Flemish.

It may come as a surprise to you that both Dutch and Flemish people are renowned for their language skills, as we have to be.

No malice intended.

cheers

onzestan

[garro]

Good points tijnebijn, but does your family in Holland not complain that they can't speak to your child in Dutch - I am assuming that you still have family there. I know my family would be a bit upset if they couldn't communicate with my son. Mind you - we are still working on 'ba-ba' at the moment.

Why would that be Garro?

You immediately assume that Tijnebijns family has no language skills.

I believe Tijnebijn to be Dutch, and I'm Flemish.

It may come as a surprise to you that both Dutch and Flemish people are renowned for their language skills, as we have to be.

No malice intended.

cheers

onzestan

I am well aware that Dutch people are famous for their language skills. I just did not assume that his family (if he has any in Holland) can all speak Thai though. I was just curious as to whether or not his family were disappointed that their grandchild couldn't speak their national language.

Edited April 21, 2008 by garro

[Jefferson]

Wow, the Farang Inquisition is out in force again.

I speak in three languages to the kid, one of them Thai, especially when it's about 'important stuff' when there can be no room for misunderstanding. In those cases I might say the same thing in a different language as well. The kid is not even 3 years old but very aware that not everyone speaks the same language, and will try a different language if one language is apparenlty unsuccessful. So contrary to popular belief, children can separate languages very well just by themselves.

gotta love the kids who learn the maids language. best to switch from a burmese maid to a cambodian maid before 5 years old

Funny you mention that.. I know of someone who has a deaf-mute maid, and guess what... The kid picked up SIGN LANGUAGE from her! ? If that doesn't tell you something about how kids are 100% tuned to picking up forms of communication & languages then I don't know what will.

[garro]

Chomsky's 'universal grammar' is an thought provoking theory for anyone interested in language acquisition.

[astral]

I did and I regret it.

As a result my step children's command of the English language is poor.

[kiakaha]

Over the last couple of days here in Phuket, I've seen a a few foreign husbands speaking Thai to their kids.

I really don't see any reason for this as they should be speaking to them in their mother

tongue so the kids

can be bilingual. Anyone have any idea why it is preferable to speak Thai to yo

ur kids when you are not Thai?

I would think that most parents would want their kids to be bilingual and speak

each native language like a

native. I would certainly not like my kids speaking Thai like myself, nor would

I want them speaking English

like my wife. I'm not saying it's either good nor bad, but just trying to understand why the native tongue isn't used.

P.S. Not sure why the formatting turned out like it did, but I guess the forum software doesn't like my browser.

well if they can speak/read/write/pronounce thai properly, no problem.

however if they are in the "i know a bunch of phrases and words but cant read/write or pronounce properly but still think i'm fluent", then they should probably stick to their native tongue.

[garro]

I did and I regret it.

As a result my step children's command of the English language is poor.

What do you mean astral?

Did you only speak Thai around your child?

I'm interested as I want to learn what mistakes to avoid.

I want my son to speak fluent English, after all I teach it, so your views will be most appreciated.

I don't want to be too strict though.

[garro]

Over the last couple of days here in Phuket, I've seen a a few foreign husbands speaking Thai to their kids.

I really don't see any reason for this as they should be speaking to them in their mother

tongue so the kids

can be bilingual. Anyone have any idea why it is preferable to speak Thai to yo

ur kids when you are not Thai?

I would think that most parents would want their kids to be bilingual and speak

each native language like a

native. I would certainly not like my kids speaking Thai like myself, nor would

I want them speaking English

like my wife. I'm not saying it's either good nor bad, but just trying to understand why the native tongue isn't used.

P.S. Not sure why the formatting turned out like it did, but I guess the forum software doesn't like my browser.

well if they can speak/read/write/pronounce thai properly, no problem.

however if they are in the "i know a bunch of phrases and words but cant read/write or pronounce properly but still think i'm fluent", then they should probably stick to their native tongue.

How would a "i know a bunch of phrases and words but cant read/write or pronounce properly but still think i'm fluent" person know that they belonged to this group?

[samran]

One word: Context

Wife and I speak pretty much exclusively in English at home when it is just us and our daughter.

When the nanny is about, I switch to 50% Thai. I speak to the nanny in Thai and Thai to my daughter when she is around the nanny.

Same when we are out and about. If shopping etc, I'll speak Thai (of course) to those around me, and when in that situation, I'll speak Thai with my daughter. Seems natural enough to me. You are in that environment, you speak the language.

If it is one on one, we switch back to English.

[t.s]

i suspect plenty of foreign "fathers" out there dont speak to their children at all. perhaps we should address that

[misterme]

I am in thier country. I am expected to speak Thai when I can, and I do.

Thai children do not understand foreigner Thai gibberish. but if you speak clearly and well, they understand. In fact, once Thai children started to understand me, I knew my Thai was getting better.

The Thai children I normally speak with wouldn't understand what I'm saying if I tried to talk in English. In fact, I'd look like the stupid one.

Unless I'm speaking with my foreigner friends or customers, I speak Thai. Much like immigrants to my country do, I am adapting to the culture here.

You forget that:

English is not important to many Thais;

Most of the people in the world do not speak English;

Some want to learn, some parents want thier children to learn;

Speaking Thai to your children in Thailand has no relevance to any of the above statements.

[Neeranam]

I am in thier country. I am expected to speak Thai when I can, and I do.

Thai children do not understand foreigner Thai gibberish. but if you speak clearly and well, they understand. In fact, once Thai children started to understand me, I knew my Thai was getting better.

The Thai children I normally speak with wouldn't understand what I'm saying if I tried to talk in English. In fact, I'd look like the stupid one.

Unless I'm speaking with my foreigner friends or customers, I speak Thai. Much like immigrants to my country do, I am adapting to the culture here.

You forget that:

English is not important to many Thais;

Most of the people in the world do not speak English;

Some want to learn, some parents want thier children to learn;

Speaking Thai to your children in Thailand has no relevance to any of the above statements.

[Thaiboxer]

You're right in saying that most people in the world don't speak English, so they'd better get with the program!

[steelepulse]

In my original post I left out the part about this is for your own kids in the developmental years ( say up to age 6 or 7).  I can surely see speaking Thai in many of the situations that have been outlined above, but I'm talking about giving your own kids a strong base in their parents native tongue.  I wish I could edit my OP to reflect his, but I can't.

[onethailand]

I speak both Thai and English to my kids - like bkkmick, my kids often correct me or snicker when I pronounce something poorly. My wife only speaks Thai to my children.

Having said that, I also send them to international school where they are expected to speak English all the time.

Their English is fluent, even if sometimes it has a hint of a Thai accent/pronunciation. There is absolutely no reason why I shouldn't speak Thai to them.

[Neeranam]

There is absolutely no reason why I shouldn't speak Thai to them.

There is when they are young - it hinders their learning in their second language and to a lesser degree their first.

[oifarang]

Let me get this straight.The Father is Living in Thailand and he is being critisized for speaking to his child in the Thai language ?

[huggybear]

Let me get this straight.The Father is Living in Thailand and he is being critisized for speaking to his child in the Thai language ?

No, he is being criticized for speaking cra**ppy Thai to his children thus reinforcing bad habits

[Khun Jean]

I am Dutch and speak English to our children and my wife.

We decided that 2 languages is enough for them. Dutch is spoken only in The Netherlands and some parts in Belgium.

My family did complain about it, but they all speak English anyway, even my 92 year old grandmother has no problems communicating with them in English. Next term they will go to a school that teaches every subject in English, and they have many children with English speaking parents. Most of a language is learned through spending time with your peers, and as they have both Engish and Thai speaking friends i am not worried they will/are fluent in both.

As for speaking Thai to my children, only when it is really needed. I don't want them to pick up my accent.

[chanman]

My Thai wife and I want our child to be bilingual. He obviously needs role models for bilingual and trilingual speaking. Therefore, I speak both English and Thai with him, as does my wife. We also speak English and Thai amongst ourselves. He will be going to a school taught in English, but we want him to be adept at the Thai language as well. It is absurd to think that parents who want their children to be multilingual should never let the child know that they are multilingual as well.

I agree, my children speak Thai and English well and will be bilingual, I speak Thai and English with them both depending on the situation, it depends how well you speak Thai I guess, I actually learn a lot of Thai talking with my family and my children think its great that we are all learning together. I have no doubt they will be fluent in both languages.

[jumnien]

My Thai wife and I want our child to be bilingual. He obviously needs role models for bilingual and trilingual speaking. Therefore, I speak both English and Thai with him, as does my wife. We also speak English and Thai amongst ourselves. He will be going to a school taught in English, but we want him to be adept at the Thai language as well. It is absurd to think that parents who want their children to be multilingual should never let the child know that they are multilingual as well.

I agree, my children speak Thai and English well and will be bilingual, I speak Thai and English with them both depending on the situation, it depends how well you speak Thai I guess, I actually learn a lot of Thai talking with my family and my children think its great that we are all learning together. I have no doubt they will be fluent in both languages.

Good job! It's important for bilingual behavior to be modelled by the parents. If they live a lie and pretend they only understand one language, the child will know in the end anyway!

[slapout]

To speak the additional languages is great, but I feel if the kids do not learn to read and write as well, we are short changeing them.