Marriage matters again

[thaisabai]

my quewstion is based on an experience of a Dutch friend that I met. He fell in love with a girl, decided to marry her, bought a house in Pattaya, went back to Holland to take care of his business, came back a few months later and his girl had taken posession of the house together with her husband and kids (she never told the dutchman that she was married). He is now spending the rest of his life fighting the case with lawyers.

Now my best friend, an  American is just about to marry an Issaan girl, that he knows since 2 1/2 years (from visits to Thailand only). she has a kid and always told him, that she is "finished" with her former husband, the father of the kid. My American friend made his girlfiend pregnant and really wants to marry her. He is now looking to get the paperwork together and he asked her to provide a statement that she is divorced. Now she is telling him that she was never legally married, just had a kid with a Thai man and he disappeared. I told my friend to be careful. who knows, her ex (if she was ever married) might show up one day and move in with her again. Is there an institution where you can check the maritial status of a Thai girl? any experience with this sort of thing?

[buasaard]

who knows, her ex (if she was ever married) might show up one day and move in with her again

This doesn't seem much a problem to me. Nobody can move in with her if she doesn't want.

On the other hands, she can always go away with someone else, even if is not her husband if she wants.

By all means ,there are documents, but of course all written in Thai. The first is the ID card. If she is still married and the ID card is recent (issued after the suspected wedding), the girl should have her husband's family name with the prefix "nai", otherwise she has her father's family name with prefix "nang".

I wouldn't worry, if they want to marry in Thailand, of course thai institution will check if she is already married, if they want to marry abroad, she is required an authorization from the thai embassy, which of course will check.

[TizMe]

Unless of course her first marriage was one of the "unofficial" weddings carried out by the monk but not registerred officially.

There are plenty of P.I firms that will do background checks on a girl for a fairly small fee, (compared with what you have to loose if it all goes tits up).

I don't know anyone that's ever used them, so I don't know how good they are.

But I wonder how good a relashionship can be if there isn't trust there to start off with. (But then again, its you that doesn't have the trust, not your friend)

[buasaard]

The problem may arise if your friend wants to adopt her previous child, or take him abroad.

Infact, they would need an authorization from the father.

If they find him, they just can arrange with some money, otherwise it's more complicated.

Have a look at the Phuket Gazette "issues and answers"

Changing a child's last name

[Bud Zumwalt]

???

Why doesn't he just rent an apartment, legalize himself for being in the country and live together for 6-months. If she has not left or the other guy shown up, maybe by that time you can look everything over, check papers. But really unless your thinking of taking her home .. what are you worred about? You really cannot purchase anything in Thailand anyway. Fact is it all goes in her name if you do, so I would advise renting. If she leaves what have you lost, if he shows up kick him out you pay the rent. If she does leave replace her, that should take all of two days. Maybe if you spend three days you can get one without a kid .. just kidding .. but believe me the country is flooded with available women .. from the type class you getting.

Bud

[Maigo6]

Bud.............hahaha, you cannot be serious, c'mon tell me you are not really living in America. You have been living in Thailand for 13 years, and that is how you have gained all this knowledge.

Thai people are exactly that...'People'....Bud you are so American it's painful. To read your uninformative, misguided, unsubstantiated and biased posts is amusing, keep them coming, i am sure that Thai people and long term Thai dwellers will learn a lot about living in Thailand from you.

Flaming response welcome...........

[benny]

I'm in! Anyone else want to enrol in the Bud Zumwalt school of Thai culture? He has already taught me so much about my wife and child. A must for all misguided residents in Thailand.  :

[taxexile]

maigo6 and benny,join the club

dontcha just love him.i dont know if hes being provocative or if he really means it.but he really is the perfect characterization of the american who thinks he can save the world,whether it wants saving or not.

keep posting bud, we love ya.

[jayrockwell]

For all you Bud lovers out there, here he is...

Nice!

[Bud Zumwalt]

???

Really guys and ladies, you all have no sense of humor, tell me you all took what I said as anymore that being a troll.

I realize some of you are such geniuses that you can get my photo off my web site, and excuse me beside being a little unclear wants wrong with the photo, I hope you can post the ones I get done professionally in Bangkok. You got too realize by now I am trying to but a little, humor, fun, into these postings. I really do have a heart, I really do undestand and respect Thai ladies, so maybe if you all understand them you should try to understand me, and maybe ad a little fun to your responses, so serious??? And besides, what would be even funnier would be that the guy/lady who is the computer wiz, posting my photos all the time, should post his/her photo so we could all have a really great laugh. That would be a way to inject humor into any future postings.

Bud

[Maigo6]

Bud, you look like a gangster.

I am gonna check the FBI website, maybe i can claim a reward on you.

Or will i settle for 40,000 baht a month, and 800,000 lump sum?  

cheers

[Travel2003]

???

Really guys and ladies, you all have no sense of humor.......

Agree!

Have some sense of humor here.

I joined this forum today, and I can already sense some of the same that made me leave nanaplaza.com.

A group of "old hands" make themselves kings of the (nanaplaza) site, and attack all other members if they do not agree with their posts.

Especially new members get a beating there.

Don't let this site become the same.

Traveler

[Heng]

IMO, falangs can lessen their risk of such situations by being a little more selective in who they choose as girlfriends/spouses.   And no it's not limited to guys who choose bargirls as life partners.   I worked with one middle aged office lady married to some CNN falang who has no idea that she's been married before.   If the marriage isn't registered in Thailand (married abroad, or married with a ceremony but no amphur registration) AND the girl chooses to blatantly lie about it, then it's difficult to know the truth.  

[chonabot]

So , that rules out Middle aged office ladies also?

That clears it up big styleee!!!!

Cheers Boyo

[MaiChai]

Well these two types of Thailand; the real Thailand and places like Pattaya. If you meet a lady in Pattaya, well there is a very high risk that she will cause you trouble. However, if you meet a lady in the real Thailand, then you are likely to meet a more honest and sincere person.

Here is another analogy. Twenty years ago the population of Koh Samui was probably very small; maybe less than 100 people. Now its a tourist hot spot there must be ten of thousands of Thais. These places always attract people who want to better themselves in life; not just street vendors and shop keepers, but those who see gold in them tourists, if you get my meaning. Prostitutes, ladies who want to better themselves in life, criminals, drug dealers, con artists, etc. You are more likely to have a safer time living in the real Thailand, than these Disneyland tourist hot spots.

PS: Haven't heard of a farang jumping to his death from a condo in Pattaya recently. It was running at about one a month.

[Khun ?]

What do you call a 15 year old girl in Isaan.

Broke, she does not have the buss fare to Pattaya.

What do you call a Thai girl with kids married to a farang =

a family bank.

[Edward B]

PS: Haven't heard of a farang jumping to his death from a condo in Pattaya recently. It was running at about one a month.

They're all in jail.

Intersting that you mention this. I know this was discussed ad nauseum a month or so ago but I saw on telly a few nights ago that a top ?Swiss coroner was asked to help with the investigation of a 'death' of a Thai minister that happened 5 years ago. Apparently the police said at the time that it was suicide (gun shot to the head). I bet the murder weapon was never found.

Anyway, now both the outside coroner and the Thai one (cool looking female with spiky red streaked hair) agree that it may have been murder. The life insurance pay-out I think would then come into play.

btw maichai, did you change your avatar?

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Thaisabai   tell your Dutch friend to stop putting out good money after bad. His chances of winning that case are way way south of nil.

[kwiz117]

???

Really guys and ladies, you all have no sense of humor.......

Agree!

Have some sense of humor here.

I joined this forum today, and I can already sense some of the same that made me leave nanaplaza.com.

A group of "old hands" make themselves kings of the (nanaplaza) site, and attack all other members if they do not agree with their posts.

Especially new members get a beating there.

Don't let this site become the same.

Traveler

Hi Travel 2003

One advice..I am not sure the Nonaplaza.com. But what you have described is happening in this forum too.

Too much American flavor in this forum. Some of them are interested about your background, where you come from etc and even go to the extent of inviting to meet up. Do not get caught to those tricks in this forum.

If you are from an Asian Country, it is better to read to understand how these people from west think, than replying to them. No space here for Asian’s.

But the Visa section in this forum is really good and very professional.

Good Luck..

[MaiChai]

Yup, changed the avatar. Best to be as untraceable as possible, in the new world of paranoia for the foreigner in Thailand, so removed the link to my little girl, and just used an image I liked on the Internet. Do you like it; its sticking a finger up where the two towers used to be.

[Heng]

Intersting that you mention this. I know this was discussed ad nauseum a month or so ago but I saw on telly a few nights ago that a top ?Swiss coroner was asked to help with the investigation of a 'death' of a Thai minister that happened 5 years ago. Apparently the police said at the time that it was suicide (gun shot to the head). I bet the murder weapon was never found.

Anyway, now both the outside coroner and the Thai one (cool looking female with spiky red streaked hair) agree that it may have been murder. The life insurance pay-out I think would then come into play.

The life insurance issue is really just a drop in the bucket for the family involved.   Murder or not, there's not much that can be done now in TIT terms.   The Thammawatana family is 10 times more connected than young Duangchalerm and company and he will get off eventually (even though he was seen by 15 witnesses shooting that cop in the head with a .22 in a crowded club).  

:cool: