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Most Of Westerners Have Experienced The 'getting Divorced'?


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Posted (edited)

Since I am not yet married.. Well, confess that one reason is I am too frightened of getting divorced...

Hey.. honestly, I don't mean to make any offense, don't get me wrong..I just see most of Westerners who experienced this is a lot more who haven't.

This is so much difference between Thai people and Westerners..Getting divorced is quite a big deal in here especially for Thai women..

A friend did, none of kid.. so she assumed being single but more freely intime relationship.

Thai men will devalue and treat her much more easily (naughty) compared to real single one. (tho not virgin)

A friend desires to, but hesitates, she has 2 kids, her hubby has mianoi... She is so sufferring in this situation but being patient..

A Western friend said the feeling passion between spouse is valid only 10years...Is it true?

I am wondering what if the getting divorced is more acceptable in Thai culture... this will be better for life?

And I will dare getting married once in life....haha...my last and broke train is about to go away..

Well, I have load of curiosity... can you tell me..

- Why got divorced?

- Your feeling after getting that? You think it is so right to do or so wrong to do?

- With the kid, have they a lot impact? Like what?

- How difference between getting it with your own nations' woman and Thai?

Edited by MidoriApple
Posted

I must say know as many Thais here that are divorced as I know Farangs that are divorced but I cannot answer your quetsions as I am not fortunate enough to be divorced myself yet.

Posted

I am very fortunate to be divorced from my ex. Things were Ok for many years until she went off the rails - not going into details here - but after a long struggle in keeping sanity and the marriage together I finally divorced her. I did wait until my son was 18 and classed as an adult because I believe parents should work together for the sake of the children they bore from the relationship.

On reflection I wish I had divorced her years before. I have been free and happy since the divorce. No stigma attached to divorce in the UK.

You refer to 10 years of love. More commonly known as the 7 year itch when one party decides they have had enough. The love dies away and they want a new adventure.

Anyone in a bad marriage should be able to divorce with no stigma attached, but I feel it is too easy to get a divorce in the West now. Children should be a big factor too but if the children are suffering because of a bad marriage then get divorced.

Here in Thailand I know more Thai ladies with children and no husband than I did back home. I understand many of these Thai ladies feel they are bad people because the relationship failed. <deleted> to that idea. If - as is often the case - the husband has a mia noi, then the lady should not feel it is her fault.

Here in Thailand it seems the man can walk away and have no support to pay to the ex or for the children. That makes it too easy for the man and leaves the woman with an unfair burden.

Why get married? Live together. Be happy.

Ahh, but then the lady has no sin-sot if she does not marry!!!!

Posted

I meet lots of university-educated Thais of working age.

And to a person, if asked their marital status, they will say single or married.

In Thai culture it is personally demeaning to admit that one is divorced.

If one were to crawl with a magnifying glass over people's personal lives, I'm sure you would find as many broken relationships here as anywhere else. The simple truth is here, one does not admit it.

In addition, in the West, a divorced child-carer/homemaker (usually the wife) is given hefty financial protection under the law both in terms of settlements and benefits. As this does not really exist in an enforceable manner in Thailand one encounters the situation of the emotionally estranged husband and wife still "married" for the sake of face and finances but effectively living separate lives, each with their own new 'secret' partner.

It is the usual Thai mixture of hypocrisy and pragmatism.

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