Gassy Passenger Etiquette

[huggybear]

So here's what happened.

I'm on a flight back from the Philippines to BKK a few weeks ago, and I got stuck with the middle seat of three, full plane, two blokes on each side of me.

Bloke on the window seat o.k., bloke on the ailse seat pretty fat, and ends up, has a terrible gas problem. Especially when he falls asleep, farting away and seriously stinking up the section. It's like he's crapping his pants. Miserable.

Were there more seats on the plane I would have just moved, but there weren't. Really, what I wanted to do was pull down the oxygen mask, but then probably would have been arrested on arrival.

So what's the etiquette people? Do you just have to sit and suffer? Can you wake the passenger up and say "man, go to the bathroom and relieve all that gas, you're killing me!"

What would you do? Anything?

[joskydive]

No idea! Just glad I wasn't in your seat!

[bkkjames]

So here's what happened.

I'm on a flight back from the Philippines to BKK a few weeks ago, and I got stuck with the middle seat of three, full plane, two blokes on each side of me.

Bloke on the window seat o.k., bloke on the ailse seat pretty fat, and ends up, has a terrible gas problem. Especially when he falls asleep, farting away and seriously stinking up the section. It's like he's crapping his pants. Miserable.

Were there more seats on the plane I would have just moved, but there weren't. Really, what I wanted to do was pull down the oxygen mask, but then probably would have been arrested on arrival.

So what's the etiquette people? Do you just have to sit and suffer? Can you wake the passenger up and say "man, go to the bathroom and relieve all that gas, you're killing me!"

What would you do? Anything?

ask the flight attendant to move you.

[huggybear]

So here's what happened.

I'm on a flight back from the Philippines to BKK a few weeks ago, and I got stuck with the middle seat of three, full plane, two blokes on each side of me.

Bloke on the window seat o.k., bloke on the ailse seat pretty fat, and ends up, has a terrible gas problem. Especially when he falls asleep, farting away and seriously stinking up the section. It's like he's crapping his pants. Miserable.

Were there more seats on the plane I would have just moved, but there weren't. Really, what I wanted to do was pull down the oxygen mask, but then probably would have been arrested on arrival.

So what's the etiquette people? Do you just have to sit and suffer? Can you wake the passenger up and say "man, go to the bathroom and relieve all that gas, you're killing me!"

What would you do? Anything?

ask the flight attendant to move you.

I mentioned, "full plane" and "were there more seats on the plane I would have just moved".

So you think the flight attendant would have put me with the pilots or what?

[bkkjames]

So here's what happened.

I'm on a flight back from the Philippines to BKK a few weeks ago, and I got stuck with the middle seat of three, full plane, two blokes on each side of me.

Bloke on the window seat o.k., bloke on the ailse seat pretty fat, and ends up, has a terrible gas problem. Especially when he falls asleep, farting away and seriously stinking up the section. It's like he's crapping his pants. Miserable.

Were there more seats on the plane I would have just moved, but there weren't. Really, what I wanted to do was pull down the oxygen mask, but then probably would have been arrested on arrival.

So what's the etiquette people? Do you just have to sit and suffer? Can you wake the passenger up and say "man, go to the bathroom and relieve all that gas, you're killing me!"

What would you do? Anything?

ask the flight attendant to move you.

I mentioned, "full plane" and "were there more seats on the plane I would have just moved".

So you think the flight attendant would have put me with the pilots or what?

well mate, you could have moved yourself to the lavatory for a bit of fresh air

[Jingthing]

Nothing you can do. Those are the breaks.

[bkkjames]

Nothing you can do. Those are the breaks.

after thinking about this situation a little more - couldn't help but wonder the real reason for this topic.

was the OP falsely accused of passing the gas

too many frowns from nearbye rows

In HIND sight, I would have made a side on a paper napkin and put it on my forehead that said "It's Not Me".

[phetaroi]

Nothing you can do. Those are the breaks.

In HIND sight, I would have made a side on a paper napkin and put it on my forehead that said "It's Not Me".

Good pun! Actually, were it really bad, I would first in a very normal voice (but so that others could hear) ask the stewardess to move me and why. Were it impossible, I would do something close to what you said, stand and in a very normal voice apologize to the other passengers for the problem in our row. I bet it would have improved. After telling the stewardess I would ask her to arrange for extra air miles to make up for the extreme discomfort...and I would have pressed her on that and insisted that she communicate my displeasure to the perk program. All politely, of course.

[JAS21]

So here's what happened.

I'm on a flight back from the Philippines to BKK a few weeks ago, and I got stuck with the middle seat of three, full plane, two blokes on each side of me.

Bloke on the window seat o.k., bloke on the ailse seat pretty fat, and ends up, has a terrible gas problem. Especially when he falls asleep, farting away and seriously stinking up the section. It's like he's crapping his pants. Miserable.

Were there more seats on the plane I would have just moved, but there weren't. Really, what I wanted to do was pull down the oxygen mask, but then probably would have been arrested on arrival.

So what's the etiquette people? Do you just have to sit and suffer? Can you wake the passenger up and say "man, go to the bathroom and relieve all that gas, you're killing me!"

What would you do? Anything?

Well maybe you could have stood up, said in a loud voice..Jesus Christ your arse smells mate..and walk down to the air hostess and say you can't stand sitting next to that guy anymore.

[pmarlin]

So here's what happened.

I'm on a flight back from the Philippines to BKK a few weeks ago, and I got stuck with the middle seat of three, full plane, two blokes on each side of me.

Bloke on the window seat o.k., bloke on the ailse seat pretty fat, and ends up, has a terrible gas problem. Especially when he falls asleep, farting away and seriously stinking up the section. It's like he's crapping his pants. Miserable.

Were there more seats on the plane I would have just moved, but there weren't. Really, what I wanted to do was pull down the oxygen mask, but then probably would have been arrested on arrival.

So what's the etiquette people? Do you just have to sit and suffer? Can you wake the passenger up and say "man, go to the bathroom and relieve all that gas, you're killing me!"

What would you do? Anything?

I always carry a product called GAS-X in my carry on bag when I travel. I would have dug it out and offered it to that passenger. The stuff works.

[sbk]

well huggy, the guy in the seat next to me was quite heinous as well, nothing like a 9 hour flight next to a stinky guy

But, he was a skinny older Japanese guy so I didn't have the heart to say anything, just pulled out some tiger balm and put it under my nostrils. It helps.

[timekeeper]

So here's what happened.

I'm on a flight back from the Philippines to BKK a few weeks ago, and I got stuck with the middle seat of three, full plane, two blokes on each side of me.

Bloke on the window seat o.k., bloke on the ailse seat pretty fat, and ends up, has a terrible gas problem. Especially when he falls asleep, farting away and seriously stinking up the section. It's like he's crapping his pants. Miserable.

Were there more seats on the plane I would have just moved, but there weren't. Really, what I wanted to do was pull down the oxygen mask, but then probably would have been arrested on arrival.

So what's the etiquette people? Do you just have to sit and suffer? Can you wake the passenger up and say "man, go to the bathroom and relieve all that gas, you're killing me!"

What would you do? Anything?

not a gas problem but equally repugnent

i was once on the Emirates ''india express '' from Dubai to Manchester UK

i was seated next to an old indian woman in a sari that reeked of stale piss

i summoned the flight attendant and once in range she sensed the problem without too many words being exchanged.

the flight was full so they sat me at the back with them

i had a real good laugh with them and a great flight.

[jackr]

not a gas problem but equally repugnent

i was once on the Emirates ''india express '' from Dubai to Manchester UK

i was seated next to an old indian woman in a sari that reeked of stale piss

i summoned the flight attendant and once in range she sensed the problem without too many words being exchanged.

the flight was full so they sat me at the back with them

i had a real good laugh with them and a great flight.

Good on ya. Did you manage to join the club?

[Tigerman1]

I sat next to an African chap once from LHR-BKK and he was stinking, really bad BO and just stunk to high heaven.

I noticed this as soon as he sat down and I immediately told the crew to move me or off load me. The flight was full but miraculously they 'found' another seat and all was fine.

In your situation I would have woken the stinking knob up and had a word. I'm not shy.

Nothing worse that sitting on a plane for 11 hrs and having stinking, smouldering people on the plane.

Another time when I flew BA from BKK-LHR (Never again as the staff on teh aircraft think they rule the world - take note BA) a chap, Brit, drunk as a lord and stinking in Khoa San Road baggy trousers and beads was trying to check in. he was beside me and so I told the check in guy to wait until the stinker was checked in and then asked him to ask his colleague which seat the stinking farang was in. he told me and I then told him to put me as far away as possible from him! i was lucky i spotted him. I felt sorry for the person sitting next to the new age asthole!!!

There is no need to stink. Have a good wash and tell people they stink as they may not know they have BO/bad breath etc.

[huggybear]

well huggy, the guy in the seat next to me was quite heinous as well, nothing like a 9 hour flight next to a stinky guy

But, he was a skinny older Japanese guy so I didn't have the heart to say anything, just pulled out some tiger balm and put it under my nostrils. It helps.

A mate at breakfast this morning said this was his strategy for getting a row of seats all to himself.

Doesn't shower for a couple days before he flys out............

The world is full of all kinds.

[Shazza]

Funny thread... my son has bo issues so we travel with deodorant and wet wipes and I send him off to get smelling better on a regular basis as we travel... I have had gas issues at times and remove myself to the loo... not sure what happens when I'm sleeping, guess I'll be really paranoid now.....

[tuky]

All odors are particulate.

Sorry folks. The first time I learnt this fact my life was never the same.

Yes, you see, all odors are particulate, which simply means that you are able to experience and identify smells because you are inhaling tiny particles of the substance itself. If you smell exhaust fumes, you are inhaling molecule-sized particles of burned gasoline. Steak on the grill? Tiny particles of steak and charcoal. Your seat mate on the plane fart? You`re breathing in small particles from his @rse......................

You get the picture.

Edited May 2, 2009 by tuky

[h90]

So here's what happened.

I'm on a flight back from the Philippines to BKK a few weeks ago, and I got stuck with the middle seat of three, full plane, two blokes on each side of me.

Bloke on the window seat o.k., bloke on the ailse seat pretty fat, and ends up, has a terrible gas problem. Especially when he falls asleep, farting away and seriously stinking up the section. It's like he's crapping his pants. Miserable.

Were there more seats on the plane I would have just moved, but there weren't. Really, what I wanted to do was pull down the oxygen mask, but then probably would have been arrested on arrival.

So what's the etiquette people? Do you just have to sit and suffer? Can you wake the passenger up and say "man, go to the bathroom and relieve all that gas, you're killing me!"

What would you do? Anything?

I always carry a product called GAS-X in my carry on bag when I travel. I would have dug it out and offered it to that passenger. The stuff works.

I have an old second worldwar gas mask.....It may looks strange but it should help as well.

[sangfroid]

Nothing you can do. Those are the breaks.

Wind breaks

[Igor]

As someone pointed out, the cr@p you're smelling is particulate, though sometimes on the molecular size scale. A bit of Tiger Balm or even a dab of perfume or anything else with an odor you appreciate on the upper lip and a well-fitting mask will cut the whiffable odors. The mask draws no attention. I learned my lessons the hard way on Pakistani Airlines.

[Asianrider]

it might be worth having two Tiger balm sticks, one for each nostril; and plenty of walks up the aisle

i think too might have been an idea to keep knocking them with your elbow - why let them sleep, if you can't because of their smell !!

[machlad]

Plenty of chat here and its not good to put up with constant smells anywhere but worse ona a plane, but apaprt from me will anyone else admit to letting a sly one out on the odd flight??

[bkkjames]

Plenty of chat here and its not good to put up with constant smells anywhere but worse ona a plane, but apaprt from me will anyone else admit to letting a sly one out on the odd flight??

That was you!!! wipe your ass mate.

[Samuian]

I would suggest the double-inhaler sticks - cheap and widely available in Thailand!

[ArranP]

Maybe ready a lighter for his next fart then light his arse up!!

[sbk]

Homeland security would get you in a heartbeat for trying to blow up the plane.

[BigSnake]

Kinda been there done that on a flight from Tokyo to Bangkok, I got and stayed up for most of the flight, when did sat down made sure that dude was wide awake, ok for a little bit then it would start again so it was up and down the hold flight WOW!! what a B#@#H of a flight.

[BigSnake]

Maybe ready a lighter for his next fart then light his arse up!!

Oh!! my lord please don't do that you will endanger all on-board just grin and bear it, while hoping and praying for an on time arrival, maybe even a little TailWIND (Pun Intented) for an early arrival.