Am I Just The Typical Stupid Farang?

[DegenFarang]

So the OP asks "Am I just a typical stupid farang" and anyone who tells him that he is, should be ignored and must be on yaba?

This kid really is totally delusional. She randomly goes out drinking without telling you and doesn't come home even on your birthday. What were you, sitting there at the kitchen table wearing an apron holding onto the cake you baked yourself looking at the door and holding the phone hoping that this time she would call?

sounds like one of those isaan music videos, but in reverse!

Joker what you seem to be ignoring is the fact that those were a couple of isolated incidents over a very long period of time (9 months I believe he said). While she may very well have been cheating on him or lying to him on those couple of incidents, that does not support the blanket statements and assumptions you are making about her, her character and her motives.

How many of us have gone out with other girls or to the gogo bars and lied to our girlfriends about it? Does that mean we love our girlfriends any less? No it isn't moral or right to lie to your loved one in that way - but rare instances like that do not automatically nullify any chance that the persons feelings were genuine, it is just human nature - especially in Thailand. Genuine monogamy seems to happen here less than in any country I have ever been to - both with women and men.

Sorry, I would never let a woman treat me this way and I can't respect any man who does. Once is all it would take, but then again, I would be able to tell in advance if she was that type of girl and would have never even been in a relationship with her in the first place.

Probably first post I have ever read of yours I have agreed with - other than the respecting them part. It isn't that they lack self respect it is that they don't know any better. They are just newbies. They believe the lies not as a character flaw but because they don't understand Thai women (yet). I'm sure the OP will catch on pretty quick the next time around.

[DegenFarang]

Deganfarang you tell this guy that thai women are such great liars in one sentence, and then go on to say how the "old guys" will tell you blah blah blah. You need to go look in the mirror boy. And Im not an old man for your info, just tired of you slagging others then trying to act like your such an understanding thai lover.

You noticed the double standard too?? signed: min mak mak

There is a huge double standard. Just as there are two types of Thai women (predators and non-predators) there are two types of TVers who will answer a question like the OP (those who will be realistic and rational and those who will ignore everything the OP said and tell him she is a dirty skank screwing half of bangkok and was using him and lying to him from day 1).

[johndpoole]

We obviously are two different kinds of people.

One of my friends told me once that he used to believe that you should tell your wife every thing. I felt sorry for him and said I still believe that. He then felt sorry for me.

Every relationship is unique and I think you have to have yours in the ways that you both can live happily with.

You are absolutely right with that last sentence. I have seen couples who appear to be happy and live completely independent and in some ways private lives. I guess really goes to the point of finding the person that is right for you and of course you being right for them. However, in 99.9% of the situations it is going to take communication honestly to get to the point of trust unless the person and partner care little about trusting each other.

Edited January 20, 2010 by tomat
fixed quotes

[johndpoole]

Who actually has read the original posters posts and believes this girl was trying to scam him or that he should be added to the list of men scammed by Thai women?

I am just curious how many actual losers are on this board.

I certainly could be wrong but nothing here would indicate this young women was anything more than a 20 something person in a young relationship ... the fact all point to a couple in love and things just didn't work (for now) out for the typical reasons they might not work out anywhere ... including it being a long distance relationship when they split.

You old fat farts can be so pathetic in being SCARED of a fairly poor, hard working 20 something year old girl. How embarrassing. It is not hard to wonder why you ended up and Thailand and are not with the family you created back home anymore.

[johndpoole]

I actually have to agree with several of the members here, and say it (unfortunately) sounds as though this is the fault of the OP. I'm sorry, but you were in a relationship with this lady for a year, and you didn't realize that helping her family back home financially was a very important aspect of her life? That's just the way of life here.

For example, take my better half. The family isn't rich, but they're fine. They have a little farm, mama has about 40 chickens, grandpa has 7 buffalos (had to sell a few to pay for little brothers medical bills), step-dad has a little convenience store that also serves food, etc. Day to day basis, they're fine. However, none of these things exactly come with lucrative pension plans, so when the children are old enough to start bringing in money, assuming they're not going to school or something, they're expected to help financially.

You shouldn't ever get yourself involved in a serious relationship with a Thai from Issan, unless you're willing to contribute to the family a little bit. And no offense, but after a year of being together, you should have known that.

Although I may agree with your insight and you may actually be factually right ... I "think" if he didn't have the means (they are in their 20s) to support the family now, they could have talked and worked through this. I think a big problem (if the family was a big issue) was her perception he could help but wouldn't. When I first met my GF and would say I couldn't afford something she didn't believe me cause of her perception of farangs here. And in fact it is kind of logical for folks here to think we are all loaded being international travelers and all.

I bet if she believed he didn't have the means and sent even a very small amount from time to time (that surely he could afford - like 1000 baht), this would have shown her that he did care about this issue being important to her ... and cared about her family too since they are part of her.

Edited January 9, 2010 by johndpoole

[a2396]

I actually have to agree with several of the members here, and say it (unfortunately) sounds as though this is the fault of the OP. I'm sorry, but you were in a relationship with this lady for a year, and you didn't realize that helping her family back home financially was a very important aspect of her life? That's just the way of life here.

For example, take my better half. The family isn't rich, but they're fine. They have a little farm, mama has about 40 chickens, grandpa has 7 buffalos (had to sell a few to pay for little brothers medical bills), step-dad has a little convenience store that also serves food, etc. Day to day basis, they're fine. However, none of these things exactly come with lucrative pension plans, so when the children are old enough to start bringing in money, assuming they're not going to school or something, they're expected to help financially.

You shouldn't ever get yourself involved in a serious relationship with a Thai from Issan, unless you're willing to contribute to the family a little bit. And no offense, but after a year of being together, you should have known that.

Although I may agree with your insight and you may actually be factually right ... I "think" if he didn't have the means (they are in their 20s) to support the family now, they could have talked and worked through this. I think a big problem (if the family was a big issue) was her perception he could help but wouldn't. When I first met my GF and would say I couldn't afford something she didn't believe me cause of her perception of farangs here. And in fact it is kind of logical for folks here to think we are all loaded being international travelers and all.

I bet if she believed he didn't have the means and sent even a very small amount from time to time (that surely he could afford - like 1000 baht), this would have shown her that he did care about this issue being important to her ... and cared about her family too since they are part of her.

This stuff about caring for her family (by the Farang) is a slippery slope here. What family members? How often? How much and for what purposes? Clearly, it is apparently the expected thing, from the family, that any worthy Farang will be forthcoming. What is reasonable is quite another story. New house, cars, pay off debts for all comers ?? Not in my list of responsibilities.

[sokal]

I apologize if I read too much into that one statement. And what is it about Thai women and money? Seems like all the guys out here who think they are money grubbing cheaters all get treated that way while others like you and me find having the GF/Wife handle the money works out best. In fact if you look when you go out to eat or even the movies it is usually the girl here in Thailand that pays. But you are right about needing to talk and trust before getting into money ... but i think it may come up sooner here and I am not sure why. Possibly because of perceptions of all farangs being rich and many of the posters going with poorer girls who hear that it is normal for a farang to give cash payments to them. Surely there is much more to this too but as I mentioned before and you indicate --- trust needs to be developed and that takes time and communications ... and a little bit of faith and taking some risks in the begining.

Yes. I think the TS actually was right in not paying in anything UNTIL the emergency situation, where he probably should have taken her to the hospital like suggested. He's a young guy (so am I) and probably doesn't have money to throw around anyway.

The thing is, and this is not just in Thailand, too many men WILLINGLY put themselves in the 'big spender' category by thinking that throwing money around will attract a girl. But women are not attracted to money! Most women won't mind a free ride though and that's what happens if you put yourself in the 'free ride' category from the get go. That's why most bar girls relationships fail. Because they started with money.

Many poor girls here naturally like the idea of money and STATUS. I dated a girl, where we went out with her friends many times and she insisted I would pay the bill, but she would then give me half back when her friends had gone home! Oh yeah, she really like to show me off. It didn't last long. You see, for some Isaan girls, farang = STATUS. It's become so normal to fleece a farang that if a girl has a farang boyfriend and does not show a noticeable increase in living, then her friends may wonder what's wrong with her since she can't get money out of the farang. That's why it's a very bad idea to play into the normal farang big spender stereotype, cause you will then be expected to front some cash.

On the other hand, I have dated girls here who wouldn't hear about me paying for them or they would pay. I even had bar girls pay my bills. If a girl really likes YOU, then she won't care about money. But in Thailand, if a poor girl stops respecting you, then many times she will look to get what she can financially.

That's why I try not to get into relationships with poor girls anymore and just stay single until meeting girls from better backgrounds. I don't think it's fair to lead these girls on either. They have a real need for finding financial stability and if I know I am not going to marry her, then I am not going to pretend that it may happen.

That's imo, why it's tough to have a relationship with these girls without money involved, because they really do need money. If not from you, then they may have to find it somewhere else.

good post

I agree, girls will take a free ride if you offer it to them.

Guys are no different, this last girl I was with put out good but I am in no position to be in a relationship with her. I feel bad about those situations but its hard to tell a girl that you would rather sleep by yourself.

[Nio]

Thnx, you are probably right with most of these things (except I'm not gone 6 months yet, 3,5 month in, the 6 was when I planned to return, but thats nitpicking ;-)). I also dont think it was mainly a sexual thing and thats why I was attracted to her.

I do want her back, and as you adviced I'm trying to talk to her sister. I hope it was just the financial thing and she wanted to get over me and doesnt really have somebody new. I will probably also go to thailand regardless, I dont wanna be a stalker though, but I think its worth persuing. Trying to show her how much I care.

I'm really not looking for one-night stands though, so I'll skip the part with bargirls.

90+% of the experienced advice here told you to hit the road and here you are saying you want her back?

This is exactly why bad Thai girls can thrive here because there are always those guys that will never give up

Here is some advice mate.

Thai girls, many of them fall in love with ONE MAN and hang on to that man for dear life forever, even if they get treated like crap and he ends up with giks

When they are in love they almost never walk away for any reason

No I am not talking about bar girls I am talking about normal girls with normal jobs

The fact this girl walked away is evidence enough you will never be the ONE for her, if you were she would have been on you like static cling

If you want to get played some more go on back

Thai Girls have the advantage that every single farang that has ever set foot on Thai soil believes HE IS THE ONE with the power to change these girls and it rarely, rarely ever happens

NEWS FLASH: Once these girls have this behavior, they never, never change

In Dubai, Emirates has a whole Government section of housing for the Thai Flight attendants that work for Emirates

There are 100's and 100's of these Thai Girls there. All have a college education which is required. All are way, way above average in beauty. All can speak perfect English.

All are from good families and raised the right way. Many own their own cars and other nice luxuries in Thailand.

All make over US $40,000 a year plus perks, 90% of them are single and wishing they could find a good faithful man.

You don't have to settle for anything less than the best.

There are millions of good girls here, don't waste your time and throw your life away on a bad girl that has already told you there is some one else

The true fact is there were probably many before you

[tigerfish]

this is not your fault op, and dont let anyone try tell you different. certainly dont go beating yourself up about it. you can only go by what you feel inside and what you think is the wright thing to do..

tried something out earlier today. i showed your post along with everyone elses imput, to my wife and her brothers and sisters. the family is thai/chinese and come from bangkok. a firm shake of the head was my wifes reaction .along with all the other females of the family. enough said. another thing that you may want to consider was what the men thought. they would have never put up with this kind of behaviour.most of thailand is a male dominated society, and what man say goes, no question about it.

there are probably alot of posters that will now come on here now and jump to the defence of how your lady carried herself and that you have to understand that this is how people who have families from isaan are. most of whom probably have wives that come from that region of thailand. the kind that will jump at the opputunity to knock any falang who questions and critises this way of thinking, and then the next day post a complaint about how something they dont like about how things are done in the los.

this is an exact reflection of the way of thinking in thailand today. you have abbisit v thaksin, you have yellow shirts v red shirts, the people of the north who sit about all day, and complain about the fact they have no money because they are poor farmers. then you have people like my wifes family, a mum and dad who started off with next to nothing, ten children, who got off their backsides worked day and night, invested in thier childrens future and are now reeping the benifits. without losing the concept of family values.

it happens the world over. wether you are in a bar in london listening to some sweaty sock, taff, mick or northener complaining about everything about your home town, that its not the same as back home, he aint got no money, but would you buy him a drink.

same happens in bangkok you have all the northeners coming down, selling their sticky rice, som tam, blasting out isaan country music night, listening to all their sob stories and then they all fuc_k back off home for songkran and happy new year. (ever noticed how peaceful bangkok is at these times of year).

as my wife said to me! wait for the phone call a year down the line when she wants you back, with baby in tow and the thai father nowhere to be seen. guess who she is going to ask her to help her out on the financial side of things. sorry mate but you seem to me to be just some poor guy caught up in this sick and twisted game.

leave it well alone, you are better off out of it.

sticky rice, thai whisky bah-nok bah-nok

[RAZZELL]

this is not your fault op, and dont let anyone try tell you different. certainly dont go beating yourself up about it. you can only go by what you feel inside and what you think is the wright thing to do..

tried something out earlier today. i showed your post along with everyone elses imput, to my wife and her brothers and sisters. the family is thai/chinese and come from bangkok. a firm shake of the head was my wifes reaction .along with all the other females of the family. enough said. another thing that you may want to consider was what the men thought. they would have never put up with this kind of behaviour.most of thailand is a male dominated society, and what man say goes, no question about it.

there are probably alot of posters that will now come on here now and jump to the defence of how your lady carried herself and that you have to understand that this is how people who have families from isaan are. most of whom probably have wives that come from that region of thailand. the kind that will jump at the opputunity to knock any falang who questions and critises this way of thinking, and then the next day post a complaint about how something they dont like about how things are done in the los.

this is an exact reflection of the way of thinking in thailand today. you have abbisit v thaksin, you have yellow shirts v red shirts, the people of the north who sit about all day, and complain about the fact they have no money because they are poor farmers. then you have people like my wifes family, a mum and dad who started off with next to nothing, ten children, who got off their backsides worked day and night, invested in thier childrens future and are now reeping the benifits. without losing the concept of family values.

it happens the world over. wether you are in a bar in london listening to some sweaty sock, taff, mick or northener complaining about everything about your home town, that its not the same as back home, he aint got no money, but would you buy him a drink.

same happens in bangkok you have all the northeners coming down, selling their sticky rice, som tam, blasting out isaan country music night, listening to all their sob stories and then they all fuc_k back off home for songkran and happy new year. (ever noticed how peaceful bangkok is at these times of year).

as my wife said to me! wait for the phone call a year down the line when she wants you back, with baby in tow and the thai father nowhere to be seen. guess who she is going to ask her to help her out on the financial side of things. sorry mate but you seem to me to be just some poor guy caught up in this sick and twisted game.

leave it well alone, you are better off out of it.

sticky rice, thai whisky bah-nok bah-nok

What a load of "regionalist" twaddle

Yeah, all people from Isaan are lazy. All Thai/Chinese are super hard-working intelligent go-getters

RAZZ

Edited January 9, 2010 by RAZZELL

[473geo]

A girl/lady has decided to move on...........

A choice in a free world..........

I don't understand what this thread is about.........

Women everywhere in the world make the same choices on a daily basis....

The Op has been dumped

7 pages of discussion........what is to discuss??

Edited January 9, 2010 by 473geo

[Dakhar]

call the girl up, appologize profusely and tell her you came down with syphillis, no big deal now due to the excellent antibiotics and such. But you wanted to warn her, because you are not sure if she gave it to you, or the 6 other girls you were shagging while you were faithfully visiting her.

let her know she may want to get herself checked out, just for good measure.

[hhgz]

"Did I fall for the typical money extraction schemer?"

In a word, yes. Move on with your life.

[zorro1]

Not many youg Thais girls marry or settle forever with a young farang guy unless she seriously wants out of Thailand, Problem is most farang want to live here. How would you live with her here doing what job?

She knows this, much easier to have 7 men sending her money while she partys with her uncle. What girl will put up with a long distance relationship at age 22? Not for long I can assure you. Sorry for your heartbreak and most of us been there , good luck

[MrRichard2009]

You had a 1 year relationship, offered up a small amount of money on your own and it didn't work out. Doesn't sound to me like anyone was scammed or at fault, not every ending has to have blame placed on it, sometimes things just don't work out. Boo Hoo

[thaiozy]

Well the subject is am i a stupid FARANG ! well i reckon i must of been for a long time.

Reason being i didn`t open my eyes to the rest of the world earlier.

But if i did i may not have the great women i have now with our son (they think he might be a movie star ha ha )

So there is no stupidity only paths & directions, some wrong (which I`m sure there`s many & some good leading to the enjoyment that life is about)

[-jr-]

About supporting family, pension is not common here. Many people rely on their children. So they invested in their children and hope that the children will take care of them when they grow old. The child was taught to take care of their parents as well, that it's part of their obligation. That's the basic.

I'm Thai and your question was about what she was thinking. Here is what I thought it could be in her mind, based on what you explained.

Love grew on the first half year. However, when you were away the first time for a month, I think she became paranoid, as many Thai women do when their significant others are away for a month (men are pigs, they screw around whenever they can, farang = promiscuous). I think that's when she started seeing someone else. Sign? Stories about helping her aunt, working late, drinking with uncle and went back home without calling you. She might help her aunt sometimes, but also used that as an easy excuse whenever she wants to go out. It's stupid because that means she was two-timing you and do what she was afraid you were doing, but she's in early 20s, right?

Then you gave her an ultimatum, she chose you and came back. She stopped seeing whoever she was seeing at that time. You two lived happily again.

Somewhere along the line, she needed the money for her mom, you refused it. Question is if her mom really needed to have that money for the treatment. You mentioned that her mom had some health issues, so maybe it's true. Could you help her at that time? Does she know that you can afford to help her? If both were true, in her mind, you don't really care about her family at all. Why should she stay with you, doing dishes, cleaning the house and do all the things housewife do? She might even think that you may think of her as a maid more than a girlfriend.

Thais don't talk much, but that doesn't mean that they don't think about it. If her mother really needed that money for hospital and she knew you could afford it but refused, you must be really selfish in her eyes. She may just kept you because there was no better option at that time.

So, when you were away this time, I guess someone else is coming to her. In that case, would you blame her for jumping to the new guy?

I agree with many people here that you'd better move on with your life.

Just my two cent. I don't know either you or her. Please don't feel like it's an accusation. I just wrote it as an alternative story because many people here only think that Thai girl = gold digger.

[zorro1]

About supporting family, pension is not common here. Many people rely on their children. So

"Why should she stay with you, doing dishes, cleaning the house and do all the things housewife do? She might even think that you may think of her as a maid more than a girlfriend."

because they are in lurve , when was the last time a westerner gave his mother in law 50k for her 3 rd heart operation? It doesnt happen in the west thats the point and it doesnt happen here either ( the heart op eye op blah blah) its just a transfer of wealth from farang to mum. This Farang didnt want to pay ,GOOD on him

Edited January 9, 2010 by zorro1

[kitiya1980]

About supporting family, pension is not common here. Many people rely on their children. So they invested in their children and hope that the children will take care of them when they grow old. The child was taught to take care of their parents as well, that it's part of their obligation. That's the basic.

I'm Thai and your question was about what she was thinking. Here is what I thought it could be in her mind, based on what you explained.

Love grew on the first half year. However, when you were away the first time for a month, I think she became paranoid, as many Thai women do when their significant others are away for a month (men are pigs, they screw around whenever they can, farang = promiscuous). I think that's when she started seeing someone else. Sign? Stories about helping her aunt, working late, drinking with uncle and went back home without calling you. She might help her aunt sometimes, but also used that as an easy excuse whenever she wants to go out. It's stupid because that means she was two-timing you and do what she was afraid you were doing, but she's in early 20s, right?

Then you gave her an ultimatum, she chose you and came back. She stopped seeing whoever she was seeing at that time. You two lived happily again.

Somewhere along the line, she needed the money for her mom, you refused it. Question is if her mom really needed to have that money for the treatment. You mentioned that her mom had some health issues, so maybe it's true. Could you help her at that time? Does she know that you can afford to help her? If both were true, in her mind, you don't really care about her family at all. Why should she stay with you, doing dishes, cleaning the house and do all the things housewife do? She might even think that you may think of her as a maid more than a girlfriend.

Thais don't talk much, but that doesn't mean that they don't think about it. If her mother really needed that money for hospital and she knew you could afford it but refused, you must be really selfish in her eyes. She may just kept you because there was no better option at that time.

So, when you were away this time, I guess someone else is coming to her. In that case, would you blame her for jumping to the new guy?

I agree with many people here that you'd better move on with your life.

Just my two cent. I don't know either you or her. Please don't feel like it's an accusation. I just wrote it as an alternative story because many people here only think that Thai girl = gold digger.

I wish coronadian could see ur post now! Thanx for posting mate!

[cognos]

jr.. this farang says excellent analysis, and probably very accurate, and your English is very good as well. Thai girls are NOT all scammers, in fact very FEW are; they just stand out like sore thumbs..

signed:..Pa jow way pon koon khrap

[tigerfish]

Both the way you met and the fact that she brought two people with her point to her being on the 'good girl' side of the pendulum. It's not a guarantee by any means but it's a good sign.

Her being from Isaan isn't a great sign, thats where most of the bar girls come from and basically anybody in Bangkok from Isaan came here to make money. It's not an indictment and there are certainly lots of girls who are of good character and intentions from Isaan - but from a statistical standpoint, it's more likely she's a 'good gir' if she were from Chiang Mai or Bangkok or something.

The place she told you in Isaan is likely a very large city and wouldn't reveal much - I would not name her moobarn (village) but I doubt thats the name she gave you. It was likely:

Surin

Korat

Ubon

Khon Kaen

Kalasin

Udon Ratchatani

Probably spelled some of those wrong and there are others but all of those are very large cities with a ton of smaller villages around them, which is where most of the girls actually come from, not those cities.

Hehe, no, the province starts with an S (but its none of the named) but she also told me the village. I saw it on the map, but as I said I dont remember, i think it was 3 words those in latin script.

hope its not sahkon nakon or your in real shit. has she ever expressed a strong desire towards dogs!

I think YOU have a real problem. Go lie down somewhere, hopefully you will be OK but l doubt it..

the only problem i have is with people like you! you clearly did not read the rest of the quotes that belonged to that particular part of the post. this coming from a man who, correct me if i am wrong lives in isaan. (ubon) si saket about 250-300 kilometers away from sahkon nakon, claims to be up to speed with the way thais live, and their traits and customs. but knows nothing about what some people do differently to others in parts of the province. your married wright to a lady from isaan, ask her what some people eat in sahkon nakon. i know because i have been there many times and have tried the local quisine and delicassies.

Edited January 9, 2010 by tigerfish

[uhuh]

OP said:

"I have to say I met her mom and she really is sick (her hand is cripled), dad left a while ago. Anyways, this one time she said mom needs (and I dont exactly remember, was it medicine, or doctor, but something like that), can you help. I said how much, I don't remember exactly but I think it was something like 7000 baht. But the cynic in me told her no, I told myself this is a slipperly slope. I said I'm not responsible for that, and I cannot give money for your mother. I said I'll take care of you no problem, but not anybody else."

contrary to what has been written on this board many times, it is NOT "farang culture" not to help people in need you are more or less close to.

I have paid this kind of money for the medical treatment of Westerners (American and Irish) in Mexico that I hardly knew when I was myself a student and didn't have much.

I have received help from farangs many many times, in their home countries or abroad.

And I know many farangs who are a lot more prepared to help than I am.

'

[thelegend]

Wake up pal and sniff the daisys......Adopt the policy ,"A long term relationship means she can stay till breakfast". Anything longer is courting disaster .

[coronadian]

Wake up pal and sniff the daisys......Adopt the policy ,"A long term relationship means she can stay till breakfast". Anything longer is courting disaster .

No offense, but you must lead a very sad sad "existence" (frankly I wouldnt even call it "life") if you truely believe that.

Then again maybe I'm a hopless romantic, but I'd rather get burned many times trying than reduce relationships to nothing but physical needs. That of course doesn't mean you have to be stupid about it. I sincerly hope I'm not the only one with such an oppinion.

BTW I'm somewhat surprised by the length of this thread, some good replies there (and some stupid ones IMO). I can't possibly reply to everyone giving me advice, so I'll just thank a general thank you for everyboy directing their oppinion towards me.

I am also talking with her again, but I don't want to spill the beans really. We'll see, I havent made up my mind yet about what exactly to do/believe.

[yabaaaa]

Her being from Isaan isn't a great sign, thats where most of the bar girls come from and basically anybody in Bangkok from Isaan came here to make money. It's not an indictment and there are certainly lots of girls who are of good character and intentions from Isaan - but from a statistical standpoint, it's more likely she's a 'good gir' if she were from Chiang Mai or Bangkok or something.

Erm I dont think so.

[thaibkk]

probably the kind of girl who love you long time as long as you get her 10/20/50k per month

when you come to thailand, she is your girlfriend

when you leave, she is girlfriend of some other farang

also milking the same amount and also be the girlfriend when he is in town for a (f*u)holliday

[cdnmatt]

when you come to thailand, she is your girlfriend

when you leave, she is girlfriend of some other farang

The way you worded it makes it sound as if it's the girls' fault most of the time. You do realize that it's the farang disappearing out of country, abandoning the Thai girl, and not the other way around, right? If there was a good hearted, decent looking farang at decent age willing to live in Thailand full-time, how many Thai ladies do you think would jump at the offer to be with him? Tons, I'm sure.

also milking the same amount and also be the girlfriend when he is in town for a (f*u)holliday

And how many husbands out in the West take care of their wives financially? The only difference with a Thai-Farang relationship is that it's upfront and honest from the beginning.

And the other major difference is alot of farangs seem to view Thais as a lower class of humans for some reason or another. If you don't like one, just grab another, no worries. They're cheap and expendable! Then people get pissy when a Thai screws them over. Well, gee, I wonder why...

Edited January 10, 2010 by cdnmatt

[tigerfish]

transam!

newbe or not , totally irrelevant. as for what you think, couldnt care less. if you had bothered to read everything and not nit pick that parts you bother to choose and qoute me on then i wouldnt be writing this now.

i know how long i have lived in the los, and do not need to justify myself to anyone thai or falang. let alone some jumped up "advanced" member on a thai chat forum site.

GET DOWN OFF YOUR PEDESTAL MATE BEFORE SOMEONE DOES IT FOR YOU!

[farmerkevin]

Coronadian...

I agree with a lot of things johndpoole posted. Read his posts again. Besides that, I think there is a fair chance that you got a 'good' girl - but it's difficult to judge really.

Anyway, whatever you do... get the book "Thailand Fever - a road map for Thai-Western relationships". It is both in Thai and English [maybe send her a copy too]. Good insight in the culture/society differences and how to handle them.

Oh... and I think many forum members should get this book [or a similar one] too, because they really don't understand much about Thai society...

[berniefromny]

one needs to define what a good girl is.

bg= bad girl

poor girl makes little mony, little education, poor familly, pops run away, willling to gi ve up what little she has to stay with a strange fella(sticks with it for long time not getting more than food and shelter) = sound like a whole lotta trouble to me aka bad girl

I CANT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD UNDERSTAND WHATS SO APPEALING ABOUT THESE.

i do understand falling for a thai style paris hilton! jennifer love hewitt or hannah montana even

Edited January 10, 2010 by berniefromny