2010 World Cup Jokes

[jonnyscot]

Hi all, we have already seen many surprise exits from this World Cup, England, USA, Italy, Denmark and France among the Early Casualties, so what about some light hearted jokes, whether relating to a team or to a particular individual,,,,, I have asked for jokes relevant to this world cup,, but I dare say, you can also include some of the old ones relating to the Scottish National team too (I think they will come anyway),,,

thanks,,

i'll start with one that I am sure most of us have had already sent to our mailboxes

The English National team have decided to remove the 3 Lions from the Badge on their shirts and replace them with 3 Tampons,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, as its been their worst period in a long time

[jonnyscot]

heres a few more that I came across:::

David Blaine is reportedly furious after England crashed out of the World Cup – his record of doing absolutely nothing in a box for 42 days was broken by Wayne Rooney.

<LI class=long>The England team visited an orphanage in Cape Town today. "It's heartbreaking to see their sad little faces with no hope," said Jamal, aged six.

<LI class=long>I've just won two tickets to see the England team. Do you want to come with me? We'll catch the bus to Gatwick Airport on Tuesday and watch them come home.

<LI>I hear Oxo are making a new product. The packaging is white with a red cross and they're calling it the laughing stock.

and just to show theres no bias,,, here's anOld Scottish one too::::

Fast forward to 2006 - it is just before Scotland v Brazil at the next World Cup Group game. Ronaldo goes into the Brazilian changing room to find all his teammates looking a bit glum. "What's up?" he asks.

"Well, we're having trouble getting motivated for this game. We know it's important but it's only Scotland. They're sh*te and we can't be bothered".

Ronaldo looks at them and says "Well, I reckon I can beat these by myself, you lads go down the pub."

So Ronaldo goes out to play Scotland by himself and the rest of the Brazilian team go off for a few jars.

After a few pints they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the teletext on. A big cheer goes up as the screen reads "Brazil 1 - Scotland 0 (Ronaldo 10minutes)". He is beating Scotland all by himself!

Anyway, a few more pints later and the game is forgotten until someone remembers "It must be full time now, let's see how he got on". They put the teletext on.

"Result from the Stadium "Brazil 1 (Ronaldo 10 minutes) - Scotland 1 (Angus 89 minutes)".

They can't believe it, he has single handedly got a draw against Scotland!! They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him. They find him in the dressing room, still in his gear, sat with his head in his hands.

He refuses to look at them. "I've let you down, I've let you down."

"Don't be daft, you got a draw against Scotland, all by yourself. And they only scored at the very, very end!"

"No, No, I have, I've let you down... I got sent off after 12 minutes"

[dabhand]

Apparently, the Nigerian football team were so upset with their poor showing at the world cup that they have offered to refund all expenses to supporters that travelled to South Africa to cheer them on.

They just need their bank account details to arrange for the refunds to be processed.............!

[jonnyscot]

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, nice one there dabhand ,,,,,,,,, cheers

[Shotime]

That was funny.

Besides the sport, the last goal of the final.

Joking.

[ianwuk]

That was funny.

Besides the sport, the last goal of the final.

Joking.

Did you hear about the new 'Robert Green' PC virus going around? Once your PC gets infected you cannot save anything.

ianwuk