Abduction Of My Daughter, By My Thai Wife

[scott1999]

please this is not a troll letter ,

i am 48 farang working in thailand now for 2 years as a school teacher, have work permit , same school as my daughter attended her age is 9

, my thai wife 49 went to live in england august 09 no contact address or number , she would ring our daughter once a week at best , the longest she didnot ring was 1 month , my daughter lived with me only for the past 2 years, in my condo in my name, i had bought 3 condos in my wifes name for our later years, anyway we lived in england till my daughter was 6 , then we came to live in thailand, but all was not well , wify started to go out more and more leaving my daughter with me to take care, then she sharted to work in a massage shop 7am till 10pm 7 days a week , she was always asking for money from me , but as a teacher i only make about 50,000 a month , so i was ok in my live, wify off the rails but i was happy in my new job and spending time with my daughter. then as i said wify went to england august 09 then she came back for holiday august 10 , she said she went back to england in september, but now i know she did not go , and on the 12th of september she abducted my daughter. i have a police warrant for the half sister of my daughter , for kidnapping , i have been in daily contact with the british embassy. contacted the border agency in england ,

my question is my wife will not let me see my daughter , i only have 1 phone number for her, no address , and i think her plan is to set up my daughter in a new school with the half sister to take care , then wify will go back to england to work, leaving my daughter with out a mother or a father.

any help in this matter would be a great help to my, thank you.

[bkkjames]

Put your post in general topics mate-many more people will see it.

Wish I could be of more help.

[onnut]

Sorry to hear of your problems, I do not have any experiance in this so I cant help much. but from reading what you have posted the only option you have is to find where she is staying and kidknap her back. she is not a baby even though I know she is only 9 years of age but what I am saying is, if you can get to talk to her surely she can either tell you where she is or better still, hop on a bus and come back to you.

but she will only come back to you if she wants! and if she doesnt want to then I dont think you can do anything about it. I cant see where the law has been broken for the police to have a warrant out! can you explain that one?

[mkawish]

Please excuse me and my own ignorance.

Did you say that you are an English teacher?

You must be under a tremendously heavy emotional pressure to have expressed yourself so very disjointedly like what you did above.

Are you really an English teacher teaching English in Thailand?

Doubting Thomas.

[sinbin]

Are you really an English teacher teaching English in Thailand?

Doubting Thomas.

I'm doubting it as well. His English is terrible. My missus could write better.

[bangkockney]

Please excuse me and my own ignorance.

Did you say that you are an English teacher?

No he didn't.

He said he was a teacher, not an English teacher (despite the sub-forum it is posted in).

To the OP: Have you thought about hiring a Private Detective to track them down? A friend did this when her husband did a runner from 4 kids and the monthly child maintenance bill.

Edited October 12, 2010 by bangkockney

[scott1999]

Sorry to hear of your problems, I do not have any experiance in this so I cant help much. but from reading what you have posted the only option you have is to find where she is staying and kidknap her back. she is not a baby even though I know she is only 9 years of age but what I am saying is, if you can get to talk to her surely she can either tell you where she is or better still, hop on a bus and come back to you.

but she will only come back to you if she wants! and if she doesnt want to then I dont think you can do anything about it. I cant see where the law has been broken for the police to have a warrant out! can you explain that one?

sure thanks for the reply, t mother had said to everyone that she was going back at the end of august, so i thought things would get back to normal, my daughters exams was coming up fast, and i was working hard to help.

then on 12th september my daughters half sister popped over to see my daughter, it was a sunday and i had work at crystal mail 4 hours work, so i said do you want to come with me or see your sister,

my daughter said she wanted to see the sister, so off i went, when i got back they had left the complex re cctv at 2pm, and i reported this to the police at 8pm, a warrant was made on the 24th of september, for the half sisters arrest, as my daughter should be with the mother or the father, not half sister, then on the 25th the mother phoned me to say that my daughter was with her, the police have done there best to help me , and understand the mother is playing games with my daughters future, but as my daughter is now with the mother, they can not do to much, but i know the mother is going back to england soon, she cannot take my daughter as i have her passport, i have tried to talk to the mother, but no good , for a divorce and to let me see my daughter, no good again,

[scott1999]

Please excuse me and my own ignorance.

Did you say that you are an English teacher?

You must be under a tremendously heavy emotional pressure to have expressed yourself so very disjointedly like what you did above.

Are you really an English teacher teaching English in Thailand?

Doubting Thomas.

please im not playing games here , if you want my phone number i will tell you what school i work at and details of my work permit, if you have nothing to contribute. please just go away

[onnut]

HI Scott,

ok, thanks for explaining. so basically in Thai law it is not Kidnapp if Mother or Father is involved but as its the step sister then it means kidnapp!

so what will happen when the wife goes back to the UK? who will your daughter live with? Like I said in my post, would it be possible for her to just jump on a bus to get back home to you? maybe the private investigator is not a bad idea to find out where she is living so you can then make your next move???

has your Daughter got a UK passport?

[scott1999]

HI Scott,

ok, thanks for explaining. so basically in Thai law it is not Kidnapp if Mother or Father is involved but as its the step sister then it means kidnapp!

so what will happen when the wife goes back to the UK? who will your daughter live with? Like I said in my post, would it be possible for her to just jump on a bus to get back home to you? maybe the private investigator is not a bad idea to find out where she is living so you can then make your next move???

has your Daughter got a UK passport?

thanks for reply

yes thats my worry the mother will go back to england and leave my daughter in the hands of who knows,

yes she has a passport and the embassy has port a stop on it, but i have it anyway. but it stops the wife trying to get a new one.

thanks again

police great

embassy great ,

my school great, re wife rang my boss to say bad things about me , and my boss just told her to speak to me.

british police great , if she goes back with out returning my daughter to me they will look for her, re kidnapping charges.

interpol great,

looks like i need a pi any idea how much they charge?

[onnut]

HI Scott,

ok, thanks for explaining. so basically in Thai law it is not Kidnapp if Mother or Father is involved but as its the step sister then it means kidnapp!

so what will happen when the wife goes back to the UK? who will your daughter live with? Like I said in my post, would it be possible for her to just jump on a bus to get back home to you? maybe the private investigator is not a bad idea to find out where she is living so you can then make your next move???

has your Daughter got a UK passport?

thanks for reply

yes thats my worry the mother will go back to england and leave my daughter in the hands of who knows,

yes she has a passport and the embassy has port a stop on it, but i have it anyway. but it stops the wife trying to get a new one.

thanks again

police great

embassy great ,

my school great, re wife rang my boss to say bad things about me , and my boss just told her to speak to me.

british police great , if she goes back with out returning my daughter to me they will look for her, re kidnapping charges.

interpol great,

looks like i need a pi any idea how much they charge?

I will send you a PM with a website which may be able to help you. good luck mate.

[Boo]

If you can find out where she is being held then I beleive under thai law, both parents if married have 50% custody. If your wife leaves to go back to Uk without your daughter or evn just leaves the house to go shops & daughter stays with grandparent etc then you are withihn your legal rights to just take her, anyone else (i.e. not the mother) can be arrested if they try to stop you.

Good luck

[scott1999]

If you can find out where she is being held then I beleive under thai law, both parents if married have 50% custody. If your wife leaves to go back to Uk without your daughter or evn just leaves the house to go shops & daughter stays with grandparent etc then you are withihn your legal rights to just take her, anyone else (i.e. not the mother) can be arrested if they try to stop you.

Good luck

Boo thank you and i agree and believe you to be correct, i have not gone in to much detail about my case but i will post some of the letters that i have sent to embassy, police, border agency,

i know my wife will have to go back to england soon to earn bigger money then she can here, thats my best chance to get my daughter back, in the eyes of the law, i forsee wife in england , main carer to be the person on kidnapping charges, so the police will have to take the carer away and give my daughter back to me, then i will have to try to get some kind of order from a court to my my daughter a ward of court, for when the wife comes back,

thank you all for reading and helping me with my problem, i am very low, but you have given me more strength to carry on. and to people that was no help and questioned my spelling, and that i am a teacher, sorry i have very little time to worry about such things, so i understand how you may think what you think, but again i have no care to spell check my letters just for you.

again big thanks to boo and onnut

[beano2274]

Maybe a meaningless question but - How will your ex wife go back to the UK, does she have the right to keep on going back, or must she apply for a Visa, if she has to apply then the Embassy would be within their rights to inform you, and also inform you of the address she used on the Application form.

[beano2274]

Your documents are in 2007, when saving use the funny Microsoft Icon in the top left corner, and use "Save As" then click on the 2003 menu. This is because some people do not have 2007, and 2003 is still more widely used. Those with 2007 can still open a 2003 document, but those will 2003 cannot open a 2007 document without downloading compatibility software.

[scott1999]

Your documents are in 2007, when saving use the funny Microsoft Icon in the top left corner, and use "Save As" then click on the 2003 menu. This is because some people do not have 2007, and 2003 is still more widely used. Those with 2007 can still open a 2003 document, but those will 2003 cannot open a 2007 document without downloading compatibility software.

thanks beano , thanks for reply

wife has ilr visa so she can go in or out of england i have looked at the rules and ilr should be for settlement only, thats why i sent the letter to the border agency , if they ask her why are you here and she does not say to settle she is then in trouble.

thanks again for help beano

[scott1999]

Your documents are in 2007, when saving use the funny Microsoft Icon in the top left corner, and use "Save As" then click on the 2003 menu. This is because some people do not have 2007, and 2003 is still more widely used. Those with 2007 can still open a 2003 document, but those will 2003 cannot open a 2007 document without downloading compatibility software.

thanks beano , thanks for reply

wife has ilr visa so she can go in or out of england i have looked at the rules and ilr should be for settlement only, thats why i sent the letter to the border agency , if they ask her why are you here and she does not say to settle she is then in trouble.

thanks again for help beano

[sarahsbloke]

As far as I can see under Thai law, no crime.

No such thing as parental abduction in this country, the half sister accusation is just nasty on your part.

In the UK

If your wife accuses you of violence, mental illness or child abuse, she will get sole custody of the child, no evidence required. If she goes to a solicitor they will advise her to do this and you will no longer be able to work as a teacher.

(happened to me)

Sorry for your loss of a child.

Best advice I can give, live with what happened, move on.

[Tywais]

You might look at this site and contact them for recommendations: Thai Law Online - Custody of a child

[scott1999]

As far as I can see under Thai law, no crime.

No such thing as parental abduction in this country, the half sister accusation is just nasty on your part.

In the UK

If your wife accuses you of violence, mental illness or child abuse, she will get sole custody of the child, no evidence required. If she goes to a solicitor they will advise her to do this and you will no longer be able to work as a teacher.

(happened to me)

Sorry for your loss of a child.

Best advice I can give, live with what happened, move on.

thanks sarahsbloke

i agree with you about parental abduction , but it was the half sister who is on cctv abducting my daughter, the police agree and judge signed the warrant. the wife has been to my school to say i like to have sex with children and been to ministry of labour re work permit both the school and ministry did not care for her comments, and she was told to see a lawyer, which of course she has already,

but i would be interested in your case ie any information that could help me. sorry for your loss too

[scott1999]

You might look at this site and contact them for recommendations: Thai Law Online - Custody of a child

thank you tywais i have read this but now i will save to my computer , many thanks for your help.

[scott1999]

today i spoke to the thai police they are happy to try and find my daughter, even if the mother is still around, but i am guessing the mother will try to put my daughter in a new school soon and go back to england alone , school term starts in 2 weeks , so my plan is to start the divorce and send the paper work up country to her home address, so the court can send an officer to visit me my wife and my daughter. wait till the school term starts, easy to find my daughter in the school system, then tell the police to start to help me look for her.

so as i father i was not informed of the taking of my daughter ,

not asked about changing schools.

have not seen my daughter now for over one month,

this is all, as i can see aganist thai law,

and hope it will help me get custody of my daughter or very good visiting rights. time will tell ,

thanks again , you know who,

[Boo]

Removed attachments as per ops request

[onnut]

today i spoke to the thai police they are happy to try and find my daughter, even if the mother is still around, but i am guessing the mother will try to put my daughter in a new school soon and go back to england alone , school term starts in 2 weeks , so my plan is to start the divorce and send the paper work up country to her home address, so the court can send an officer to visit me my wife and my daughter. wait till the school term starts, easy to find my daughter in the school system, then tell the police to start to help me look for her.

so as i father i was not informed of the taking of my daughter ,

not asked about changing schools.

have not seen my daughter now for over one month,

this is all, as i can see aganist thai law,

and hope it will help me get custody of my daughter or very good visiting rights. time will tell ,

thanks again , you know who,

Good luck mate, let us know how it all turns out for you. keep your chin up and remember you have your daughter to think of. you will get her back, just dont give up.

[Mario2008]

Under Thai law the parents determine the place where their child is staying. Currently you both have parental rights over the child, meaning the police can not do very much for you. Only when the child stays with another person than her mother can you demand the child back , with the help of the police if necesarry. (That includes when the child is at school or at the grandparents for example. Only the mother can refuse to give you the child, as she has an equal claim as you).

The only person who can resolve this is a judge. Thai judges are not biased against foreigners and will act in the best intrest of the child. However, they are not keen on giving one of the parents sole parental rights. For that there must be a very good reason, such as the mother being a danger for the child or unable to care for the child. But a Thai court can give one of the the parents the prime care over the child and give the other parent visitation rights.

It is best if you start documenting all the things you do and pay for the child and how the mother behaves towards the child.

[bangkockney]

Since it seems a court case is highly likely, you could also consider getting affidavits from staff at your school detailing the allegations your wife made, the trouble she tried to cause you etc.

I assume that you would want custody of your daughter, with your wife having regular access?

Divorce is so horrible and messy.

Best of luck to you and the hunt for your daughter - have you found much good info on a PI?

[scott1999]

Since it seems a court case is highly likely, you could also consider getting affidavits from staff at your school detailing the allegations your wife made, the trouble she tried to cause you etc.

I assume that you would want custody of your daughter, with your wife having regular access?

Divorce is so horrible and messy.

Best of luck to you and the hunt for your daughter - have you found much good info on a PI?

wow thanks boo onnut mario and bangkockney , great help great ideas

as for looking for pi , i have phoned some, and did not like their tone, im thinking the police will be best for me,

i think the police will be cheaper too , as i am just a poor english teacher now,

with all your help i feel i have a plan now , god i miss my daughter,

thanks again for taking the time to help me , you all have done your good deed for today , sleep well.

[dekbahnnok]

HI Scott,

ok, thanks for explaining. so basically in Thai law it is not Kidnapp if Mother or Father is involved but as its the step sister then it means kidnapp!

so what will happen when the wife goes back to the UK? who will your daughter live with? Like I said in my post, would it be possible for her to just jump on a bus to get back home to you? maybe the private investigator is not a bad idea to find out where she is living so you can then make your next move???

has your Daughter got a UK passport?

thanks for reply

yes thats my worry the mother will go back to england and leave my daughter in the hands of who knows,

yes she has a passport and the embassy has port a stop on it, but i have it anyway. but it stops the wife trying to get a new one.

thanks again

police great

embassy great ,

my school great, re wife rang my boss to say bad things about me , and my boss just told her to speak to me.

british police great , if she goes back with out returning my daughter to me they will look for her, re kidnapping charges.

interpol great,

looks like i need a pi any idea how much they charge?

I will send you a PM with a website which may be able to help you. good luck mate.

in the Bangkok Post you will find a legal advice column with an address so you can e mail a question...a very good law firm...the mother of my daughter ran away with my daughter...you can find the column on their website....check it out immediately...

[scott1999]

HI Scott,

ok, thanks for explaining. so basically in Thai law it is not Kidnapp if Mother or Father is involved but as its the step sister then it means kidnapp!

so what will happen when the wife goes back to the UK? who will your daughter live with? Like I said in my post, would it be possible for her to just jump on a bus to get back home to you? maybe the private investigator is not a bad idea to find out where she is living so you can then make your next move???

has your Daughter got a UK passport?

thanks for reply

yes thats my worry the mother will go back to england and leave my daughter in the hands of who knows,

yes she has a passport and the embassy has port a stop on it, but i have it anyway. but it stops the wife trying to get a new one.

thanks again

police great

embassy great ,

my school great, re wife rang my boss to say bad things about me , and my boss just told her to speak to me.

british police great , if she goes back with out returning my daughter to me they will look for her, re kidnapping charges.

interpol great,

looks like i need a pi any idea how much they charge?

I will send you a PM with a website which may be able to help you. good luck mate.

in the Bangkok Post you will find a legal advice column with an address so you can e mail a question...a very good law firm...the mother of my daughter ran away with my daughter...you can find the column on their website....check it out immediately...

dekbahnnok thank you very much , and i will do , and if you could tell me about what happened to you , i would be very interested,

[scott1999]

does anyone have an idea how much a divorce costs in thailand?

i have a lawyer now but i am finding it hard to understand him, as his english is not very good , and paper work is all in thai.