Only In Thailand

[monty1412]

Had a TIT ( This is Thailand) Moment today. Was up at Homepro in Chalong Phuket and stopped at cafe with outside seating to have an ICED COFFEE. Waiter comes over I ask for ICED COFFEE he looks puzzled.. I indicate with hands to get menu and he scuttles off.. about 3 minutes later he deliveries menu. Point to ICED COFFEE in the ICED COFFEE SECTION. He nods and goes away.

About 5 minutes later he heads out with tray and guess what its a cup of black HOT COFFEE.

I say no its was ICED COFFEE, he looks confused and I again gesture for menu and then after a few minutes he comes back with menu.

He himself points to ICED COFFEE and then points to Cup to indicate that is what I have ordered.. I with patience of a saint turn the page of the menu and show him that in fact what he has delivered is HOT COFFEE as their are pretty little pictures in the menu. I return the page and point to menu picture which shows a lovely tall glass of ICED COFFEE. He looks at me and scampers inside again.

Another 5 minutes go by and Im starting to wonder if this isn't a Candid Camera setup.. however i wander in and ask the lass behind the register where is my drink. She says its coming... so is Christmas I think to myself, I ask if its made yet and she says no ,so having run out of time having spent 15 minutes investment at this place with not a sight of what I ordered I politely tell her mai pen lai. Just cancel it.

She say Ok then says 150 Baht. Now I know this is either candid camera or there is some competition on here to see which one of the staff can get a farang to have a melt down.

I tell her I have ordered it and it hasn't come and she says " you order , you pay" in that typical curt Thai tone when they get their back up...

I turn around and start out the door with her yelling at the top of my voice. Don't know what she was saying but I suspect she was questioning the marital state of my parentage and DNA lineage .

She comes out and says in English.. you no come back OK.

I turn around and say fine and give her a smile.

Turning to go I meet a group of holiday farang coming in who have just witnessed all of this. One of them cocks his head and says "trouble ???"

I decide that one good turn deserves another and tell the group of six who are presumably coming for lunch as its about this time of day... " I just went back to tell them that i got very sick from the food i had here two days ago .... they wouldn't listen , I wasnt trying to complain just to notify them"... Turn tail and walk away... cock a look back and the six farang have mysteriously decided to not not avail themselves of this establishments fare and have wandered off.... girl at door looking at me.. she knows I've said something that has turned them away. I give her a thumbs up and walk away .

We all have these moments all the time I know but rarely does providence land you wit the opportunity to payback in quantities greater than the original dispute.

Lots of other eateries around the area so wasn't to worried that the obliging farangs would go hungry.

Cheers , keep your cool as best you can.

[HeavyDrinker]

Monty, never, ever, ever go to Spain....

You'd never be off the keyboard...

[HeavyDrinker]

Could I also suggest the purchase of a phrasebook or that you take a few lessons in the Thai language?

Both rather obscure (and to some, ridiculous) tactics may go a long way in minimising the occurrence of such disasters in the future,

Just a thought...

Edited November 19, 2011 by HeavyDrinker

[Jingthing]

Not comfortable about your lying to the tourists, but that's definitely amusing. It reminds me once when I was living in a slum building in the US (trying to break the lease with cause) and I was honestly warning prospective tenants about how crappy it was managed, and the evil witch manager saw me, I thought she was going to call the police on me.

Edited November 19, 2011 by Jingthing

[krading]

Could I also suggest the purchase of a phrasebook or that you take a few lessons in the Thai language?

Both rather obscure (and to some, ridiculous) tactics may go a long way in minimising the occurrence of such disasters in the future,

Just a thought...

You could also suggest they at least give their staff a few lessons as to what is on the menu.

[ludditeman]

learn to say, "ga-faye yen cap"

[Jingthing]

There are no guarantees or limits of absurdity to how Thai waiters process f-rang communication.

The other day I ordered pak boong fai daeng in Thai and was presented with chicken with cashew nuts!

Edited November 19, 2011 by Jingthing

[ExpatOilWorker]

learn to say, "ga-faye yen cap"

Hey, watch out. He was outside HomePro and migh get a roll of Gaffer Tape when saying the above.

[mca]

150 baht? Shit. At least when you walk into Starbucks you know in advance you're going to be mugged.

[ludditeman]

The other day I ordered pak boong fai daeng in Thai and was presented with chicken with cashew nuts!

Get real Jing that does sound very similar to "guy pat met ma moo-an", easy mistake for any waiter to make.

[Jingthing]

The other day I ordered pak boong fai daeng in Thai and was presented with chicken with cashew nuts!

Get real Jing that does sound very similar to "guy pat met ma moo-an", easy mistake for any waiter to make.

Funny joke. I also pointed to the item on the menu. It was obviously stereotyping. Who ever heard of a f-rang sending back chicken cashew nuts?

Edited November 19, 2011 by Jingthing

[Ijustwannateach]

There are a number of very poor service staff who basically don't listen. Even when they do listen, they don't understand or get it right, even if you speak Thai.

Face it, if they had had good secondary or basic tertiary educations, they wouldn't be working as service staff in regular restaurants.

Added complications can include:

1. Not really Thai - Burmese or Cambodian or Lao and possibly not proficient either in Thai or in English (though to be frank, if they are not Thai and working as service staff the chance they will understand some English goes up).

2. Not proficient in central Thai - they may have grown up mainly speaking a dialect which most foreigners haven't learned.

3. Learning disabled or extremely educationally disadvantaged - a very real possibility and a sad one. Some service staff may not even be able to read Thai.

4. You Are White Therefore You Speak English - they hear what you say assuming it is English and mapping it onto whatever they think is the closest English equivalent, even if you are speaking Thai with godly pronunciation.

4. Don't Care/ They Don't Get Rewarded For Good Service/ They Don't Notice When They Get Rewarded For Good Service - these are the ones who should get out and out fired, but good luck with that.

[BugJackBaron]

There are a number of very poor service staff who basically don't listen. Even when they do listen, they don't understand or get it right, even if you speak Thai.

Face it, if they had had good secondary or basic tertiary educations, they wouldn't be working as service staff in regular restaurants.

Added complications can include:

1. Not really Thai - Burmese or Cambodian or Lao and possibly not proficient either in Thai or in English (though to be frank, if they are not Thai and working as service staff the chance they will understand some English goes up).

2. Not proficient in central Thai - they may have grown up mainly speaking a dialect which most foreigners haven't learned.

3. Learning disabled or extremely educationally disadvantaged - a very real possibility and a sad one. Some service staff may not even be able to read Thai.

4. You Are White Therefore You Speak English - they hear what you say assuming it is English and mapping it onto whatever they think is the closest English equivalent, even if you are speaking Thai with godly pronunciation.

4. Don't Care/ They Don't Get Rewarded For Good Service/ They Don't Notice When They Get Rewarded For Good Service - these are the ones who should get out and out fired, but good luck with that.

Number 4 is not really common. Usually it is due to the farang who thinks his Thai is actually intelligible to anyone but another farang. Sorry but I call 'em as I hear 'em. The two farang coworkers I know who speak Thai - one at intermediate level and one fluently do not have this problem. If your pronunciation is truly good they will understand.

As an aside, If you are in Pattaya being white means being thought of as Russian these days.

[Ulysses G.]

Usually it is due to the farang who thinks his Thai is actually intelligible to anyone but another farang. Sorry but I call 'em as I hear 'em.

I concur. Joe Cummings and Andrew Biggs do not have these problems.

[jackr]

Well done; you should have also flicked the biatch the bird.

[hehehoho]

What a sad and pathetic story.

Visit a country where you cannot speak any of the language, then get upset and angry that a young uneducated waiter gets your order mixed up. Refuse to wait. Refuse to pay. Then lie to a large group of potential customers in order to cost them more business.

Some Westerners and their attitudes here are absolutely disgusting.

It is a pity that the staff didn't hear your blatant lies that were served to lose them business and money and have you charged with slander.

Edited November 20, 2011 by hehehoho

[noise]

There are a number of very poor service staff who basically don't listen. Even when they do listen, they don't understand or get it right, even if you speak Thai.

Granted I live in Chiangmai and not Bangkok, but I never have those problems.

And pointing to a picture does not get what the picture shows? There might be some missing info, at least from the waiter's viewpoint?

[monty1412]

There are a number of very poor service staff who basically don't listen. Even when they do listen, they don't understand or get it right, even if you speak Thai.

Granted I live in Chiangmai and not Bangkok, but I never have those problems.

And pointing to a picture does not get what the picture shows? There might be some missing info, at least from the waiter's viewpoint?

Yes I think you are right. On reflection what I think happened was that the wiater mucked up the order.. I mean I pointed to the galss of Ice coffe picture when first ordering and asked for nueng gao. Too embarrassed to tell the lady he had made a mistake he tells her i have changed my mind and dont want the HOT COFFEE. As a result lady thinks Ive ordered and wont pay.

Only explanation for it and quite reasonable and consistent behaviour with someone who is probably a new staff member.

Rgds

[monty1412]

What a sad and pathetic story.

Visit a country where you cannot speak any of the language, then get upset and angry that a young uneducated waiter gets your order mixed up. Refuse to wait. Refuse to pay. Then lie to a large group of potential customers in order to cost them more business.

Some Westerners and their attitudes here are absolutely disgusting.

It is a pity that the staff didn't hear your blatant lies that were served to lose them business and money and have you charged with slander.

Are you completely stupid or do you have a basic comprehension problem.

I havent visited.. I live her

Who said anything about getting mad or upset.. I kept my cool at all times.

Refuse to wait.. I think 15 minutes to wait for a iced coffee is probably streching it abit and arguably showing a degree of patience

Refuse to pay... tell me when you have willingly paid for goods ordered but not received.

On reflection I probably shouldnt have poisoned the other folks perceptions of the restaurant and if you see may later post i think Ive figured out what went on but your little tirade has more emotion and anger in it than the whole event had.

Probably helpful to you if you use this board to let off steam.

Just read the OP next time and try not to jump to so many conclusions.

[hedonist44]

What a sad and pathetic story.

Visit a country where you cannot speak any of the language, then get upset and angry that a young uneducated waiter gets your order mixed up. Refuse to wait. Refuse to pay. Then lie to a large group of potential customers in order to cost them more business.

Some Westerners and their attitudes here are absolutely disgusting.

It is a pity that the staff didn't hear your blatant lies that were served to lose them business and money and have you charged with slander.

It's a pitty someone gave you a soap box to stand on today. Why not get off and go back to your congregation.

[DP25]

4. You Are White Therefore You Speak English - they hear what you say assuming it is English and mapping it onto whatever they think is the closest English equivalent, even if you are speaking Thai with godly pronunciation.

Number 4 is not really common. Usually it is due to the farang who thinks his Thai is actually intelligible to anyone but another farang. Sorry but I call 'em as I hear 'em. The two farang coworkers I know who speak Thai - one at intermediate level and one fluently do not have this problem. If your pronunciation is truly good they will understand.

As an aside, If you are in Pattaya being white means being thought of as Russian these days.

It's not common for me, and I'm not fluent yet, but it does happen. I've even talked to someone on the phone with no problem but in person they had a problem initially. It takes a minute for it to click with some people.

[thequietman]

There are a number of very poor service staff who basically don't listen. Even when they do listen, they don't understand or get it right, even if you speak Thai.

Face it, if they had had good secondary or basic tertiary educations, they wouldn't be working as service staff in regular restaurants.

Added complications can include:

1. Not really Thai - Burmese or Cambodian or Lao and possibly not proficient either in Thai or in English (though to be frank, if they are not Thai and working as service staff the chance they will understand some English goes up).

2. Not proficient in central Thai - they may have grown up mainly speaking a dialect which most foreigners haven't learned.

3. Learning disabled or extremely educationally disadvantaged - a very real possibility and a sad one. Some service staff may not even be able to read Thai.

4. You Are White Therefore You Speak English - they hear what you say assuming it is English and mapping it onto whatever they think is the closest English equivalent, even if you are speaking Thai with godly pronunciation.

4. Don't Care/ They Don't Get Rewarded For Good Service/ They Don't Notice When They Get Rewarded For Good Service - these are the ones who should get out and out fired, but good luck with that.

This is quite a common occurance for my wife and I, so she always insists that the waiter/waitress writes our order down.

on one occassion i was ordering boiled eggs so she asked the waitress to write down the order and read it back.the young lady did but my wife asked specifically not to bring out the toast and coffee before the eggs as they get cold while we are waiting. she repeated it twice to the lady "bring everything together, dont bring the coffee and toast first....ok" the waitress confirmed the order and we waited.

sure enough, 2 minutes later, in she comes with the toast and coffee (no eggs) and puts them on our table. I looked at the wife, she at me and then we just burst into raptures of laughter. I actually cried with laughter. we got strange looks from the waitress and then 15 minutes later, out came the eggs and so we started again with the laughter.

its just something that appears to be the norm, i cant give a reason. its the same in most restaurants and its funny as hell.

oh by the way my wife is thai so there wasnt a language barrier.

Edited November 20, 2011 by thequietman

[TheWalkingMan]

I thought it was funny slice of life story in Thailand.

[bobbin]

What a sad and pathetic story.

Visit a country where you cannot speak any of the language, then get upset and angry that a young uneducated waiter gets your order mixed up. Refuse to wait. Refuse to pay. Then lie to a large group of potential customers in order to cost them more business.

Some Westerners and their attitudes here are absolutely disgusting.

It is a pity that the staff didn't hear your blatant lies that were served to lose them business and money and have you charged with slander.

Are you completely stupid or do you have a basic comprehension problem.

I havent visited.. I live her

Who said anything about getting mad or upset.. I kept my cool at all times.

Refuse to wait.. I think 15 minutes to wait for a iced coffee is probably streching it abit and arguably showing a degree of patience

Refuse to pay... tell me when you have willingly paid for goods ordered but not received.

On reflection I probably shouldnt have poisoned the other folks perceptions of the restaurant and if you see may later post i think Ive figured out what went on but your little tirade has more emotion and anger in it than the whole event had.

Probably helpful to you if you use this board to let off steam.

Just read the OP next time and try not to jump to so many conclusions.

Monty.....

You didn't get what you ordered and you didn't pay. Fair enough.

Getting caught up in the moment and lying(!) to potential customers was not on. Unfortunately, you realized this after the damage to the business was done.

[ludditeman]

I went to a totally Thai place for coffee today

Mawk-kaa yen mai waan, Laa-tay yen waan nitnoy

Two Laa-tay yen arrived, when I mentioned the Mawk-kaa the lady immediately repeated Mawk-kaa yen mai waan.

Confirming she understood exactly what I had asked for, but just not getting the order right.

Thai workers in the service industry are just not very bright.

But if you apologists want to blame my accent, feel free.

[Ulysses G.]

But if you apologists want to blame my accent, feel free.

Thanks for being so sensible. Mine is not very good either.

[BugJackBaron]

4. You Are White Therefore You Speak English - they hear what you say assuming it is English and mapping it onto whatever they think is the closest English equivalent, even if you are speaking Thai with godly pronunciation.

Number 4 is not really common. Usually it is due to the farang who thinks his Thai is actually intelligible to anyone but another farang. Sorry but I call 'em as I hear 'em. The two farang coworkers I know who speak Thai - one at intermediate level and one fluently do not have this problem. If your pronunciation is truly good they will understand.

As an aside, If you are in Pattaya being white means being thought of as Russian these days.

It's not common for me, and I'm not fluent yet, but it does happen. I've even talked to someone on the phone with no problem but in person they had a problem initially. It takes a minute for it to click with some people.

Don't forget that the context is important. Obviously if you are ordering pizza then the person on the other end of the phone is probably used to farang pronunciation and can predict. to a certain extent, what will be asked or ordered.

In some situations there is no context and so accuracy in pronunciation becomes more important. Examples may be as simple as telling the motorcycle taxi driver where you want to go.

When they understand me - and I am getting better - I know I've said it correctly.

[elliss]

learn to say, "ga-faye yen cap"

cafe yen , nit noi , kap .

that really fcks em up .

:jap:

[thaibeachlovers]

There are a number of very poor service staff who basically don't listen. Even when they do listen, they don't understand or get it right, even if you speak Thai.

Face it, if they had had good secondary or basic tertiary educations, they wouldn't be working as service staff in regular restaurants.

Added complications can include:

1. Not really Thai - Burmese or Cambodian or Lao and possibly not proficient either in Thai or in English (though to be frank, if they are not Thai and working as service staff the chance they will understand some English goes up).

2. Not proficient in central Thai - they may have grown up mainly speaking a dialect which most foreigners haven't learned.

3. Learning disabled or extremely educationally disadvantaged - a very real possibility and a sad one. Some service staff may not even be able to read Thai.

4. You Are White Therefore You Speak English - they hear what you say assuming it is English and mapping it onto whatever they think is the closest English equivalent, even if you are speaking Thai with godly pronunciation.

4. Don't Care/ They Don't Get Rewarded For Good Service/ They Don't Notice When They Get Rewarded For Good Service - these are the ones who should get out and out fired, but good luck with that.

This is quite a common occurance for my wife and I, so she always insists that the waiter/waitress writes our order down.

on one occassion i was ordering boiled eggs so she asked the waitress to write down the order and read it back.the young lady did but my wife asked specifically not to bring out the toast and coffee before the eggs as they get cold while we are waiting. she repeated it twice to the lady "bring everything together, dont bring the coffee and toast first....ok" the waitress confirmed the order and we waited.

sure enough, 2 minutes later, in she comes with the toast and coffee (no eggs) and puts them on our table. I looked at the wife, she at me and then we just burst into raptures of laughter. I actually cried with laughter. we got strange looks from the waitress and then 15 minutes later, out came the eggs and so we started again with the laughter.

its just something that appears to be the norm, i cant give a reason. its the same in most restaurants and its funny as hell.

oh by the way my wife is thai so there wasnt a language barrier.

Is it just Thailand, but why do they insist on ALWAYS bringing out the starter AFTER the main course?

I keep meaning to order just the starter, and then later ordering the main, but having age related forgetfullness I keep forgetting to do so. Really P me O and usually end up wishing I hadn't come.

[Jingthing]

It is Thai practice to bring out whatever is ready when it is ready. In better western oriented places they are trained about the order thing. I have also thought about ordering in steps, but usually too hungry to actually do that to think of it. In the US at some Asian restaurants, they do the opposite when serving non-Asians. Instead of bringing out dishes family style (which I prefer and is authentic for Asian meals) they will serve in courses, western style. For example, the som tum would be served first and you are supposed to finish it before the other food comes.