Do's and Dont's when meeting a thai girls family for the first time?

[GreenSnapper]

I done the bar scene loads and I plan to keep doing it lol. I just thought a few days away to a see a different part of the country would be fun.

Leave the bar scene for the time when you are over 70.

In your age, there is plenty of p*ssy at every corner.

[khunpa]

I done the bar scene loads and I plan to keep doing it lol. I just thought a few days away to a see a different part of the country would be fun.

Leave the bar scene for the time when you are over 70.

In your age, there is plenty of p*ssy at every corner.

Well, that really depends pretty much on how he looks...

[giggles]

a fat bulging wallet with plenty of folding will get their juices flowing and planty da bling brother;they want to see that a good dowry is coming

[FDog]

Go and enjoy it with an open mind. You may get bored quickly though. Life can be very simple up there. May be an idea to have a good supply of beers and a good book to read.

I'm sure you will enjoy it.

[ryro88]

That's the plan Fdog I will be an experience if nothing else.

[transam]

Go and enjoy it with an open mind. You may get bored quickly though. Life can be very simple up there. May be an idea to have a good supply of beers and a good book to read.

I'm sure you will enjoy it.

Yep, my life is simple up here.

[jbrain]

Go and enjoy it with an open mind. You may get bored quickly though. Life can be very simple up there. May be an idea to have a good supply of beers and a good book to read.

I'm sure you will enjoy it.

Yep, my life is simple up here.

Simple Simon said

[TheSpade]

Sounds like my idea of hell.

Hanging out with poor people on a farm is not my cup of tea. Nothing against poor farmers I'd just have nothing in common with them and feel uncomfortable in that sort of environment.

Well, that really depends pretty much on how he looks...

No need to look like Brad Pitt to find yourself a decent enough looking girl who's not part of the bar scene.

[itchybum]

I was offered some sort of rat crossed with a kangaroo on a bbq and washed down with chinese rice whiskey on one of my early visits.

It was quite delicious.

You have that to look forward to.

[Gsxrnz]

OP - here's an analogy for you.

If a bloke (regardless of age/maturity etc) says to me "hey I've been riding this iddy biddy 110cc scooter for a few weeks now and I think I'm ready to buy that 1000cc Superbike - what do you think?"

My answer is "Mate, you may think you know how to ride that scooter, but a superbike is a bit of a jump. Chances are you'll kill yourself. You need a lot more experience and move up in size gradually as your experience increases.

Bringing it back to your original question OP, you're inexperienced and don't know anywhere near enough about what you are potentially letting yourself in for. Not just the actual visit, but the potential aftermath of the visit.

Inform yourself a great deal more before you twist the grip on your Superbike, or just stick with the Scooter and putter around Patts.

[ryro88]

It's a quick stopover for a few days to say hello while we are visiting the ubon area. I really don't see a problem with this.

[arminbkk]

LOL to the replies on this thread.

OP, just explain more about the girl, and be honest about it.

Most of the posters here are just messing with you, have fun.

It's not that bad.

Some girls are just modern, so for them it's not a big thing to bring a guy/boyfriend to meet the family.

It doesn't mean marriage has to be the next step.

But it is a serious step to some extent, so do consider what the girl might expect after the visit.

As for meeting the family:

Just take to heart the advice regarding where to put your feet, wai the parents, don't touch the children, smile, try the food,

say it is 'pet' and smile.

Just be nice and friendly. Dress average but decent. Don't dress rich looking.

Keep the visit to a pop-in: spend a few hours then leave.

You could bring some small gifts, but don't shower them with gifts.

What is always a good idea is to go to the market before and bring food as gift!

As you stated, for you it is also an opportunity to see another part of Thailand.

You should go with that in mind: to go and have a look with no intention of staying.

Try to show interest in the people and their lives, but don't ask too much.

You will probably experience what most farang experience in this situation; you get 'ignored' after 10 minutes,

cos people change the topic, the focus shifts, mainly due to language barrier.

For a lot of poster, as soon as you mention Ubon, aka Issarn, it just has to involve bar girls.

While it is true that most bar girls come from there, it doesn't mean that all are the same.

However, whether your gf is a bargirl or not, you can answer yourself.

There are a lot of normal people in Ubon also.

[harryfrompattaya]

They live in the countryside in ubon ratchatani and from what I can take from the pics I have seen they are not overly wealthy.

Don't worry at all.

Remember you are meeting people, who willingly have sent their daughter to the city to work as a prostitute, so that they themselves could keep sitting on their lazy asses back in the village. They are people, who have phoned your girlfriend every day asking for more money, although knowing what she had to do to get it.

They are people who will be proud that their daughter comes home with a Farang (showing all in the village the truth) - and all they will be thinking about is the house and car, that you are going to buy for them. They are people of very high moral and high standards. The perfect in-laws to have!

A mom and dad that sends their daughter into prostitution - Who can't respect that? So just remember to show them great respect, because you are dealing with people of very high moral standards.

You 100 per cent right why would anyone after being told the truth want to meet the family.

Get a new GF it should take 5 minutes

[mca]

Don't turn up from your part time job as "Coco the Performing Clown" in full regalia and squeeze the HONK HONK vintage car horn in your possession every time the mother bends over to pick something up or whatever. They don't like that.

I learned my lesson the hard way..............

Edited September 13, 2013 by mca

[transam]

Don't turn up from your part time job as "Coco the Performing Clown" in full regalia and squeeze the HONK HONK vintage car horn in your possession every time the mother bends over to pick something up or whatever. They don't like that.

I learned my lesson the hard way..............

We know chum, got the photo........................

[Gsxrnz]

It's a quick stopover for a few days to say hello while we are visiting the ubon area. I really don't see a problem with this.

And that proves the very point - you don't see the problem. The fact that you aren't aware of the social, cultural, financial, and emotional issues is a major problem.

[ryro88]

Yes I am well aware of these issues and I don't mind helping out and giving out a few baht here and there to her family for putting us up for a night or two.

[transam]

Yes I am well aware of these issues and I don't mind helping out and giving out a few baht here and there to her family for putting us up for a night or two.

Would you do that in farangland if it cost folk nothing to give you a nights sleep ? Don't make a rod for your own back eh.

[khunpa]

Yes I am well aware of these issues and I don't mind helping out and giving out a few baht here and there to her family for putting us up for a night or two.

Please let us know how long time, you have known this girl and how serious it is between you. Do you live together etc....? Its much easier to give you some serious advise then.

Edited September 13, 2013 by khunpa

[Gsxrnz]

Op - if you do go for the visit, I'd like you to undertake and give us a bit of a trip report on your return.

Some of the advice you've received has been a bit tongue in cheek, but behind all of the semi cryptic comments there is substantial truth. Even those of us in successful (to date) long term relationships have had some interesting, frustrating, costly, and also very wonderful experiences with Thai families.

I think most of us are just saying that you have a lot to learn and understand, and your apparent naivety may land you in a place you don't want to be. From your posts you also seem like a reasonable bloke - this is both a good and a bad thing, as you are destined to find out.

Sometimes the best way is to do it the hard way and figure it out yourself. That may well be costly from a financial and emotional perspective, but the lessons may be worth it.

Good luck, and be sure to revive this thread when you return. I'm picking that right now you think you have it under control and assume the advise you've received is a little lopsided and maybe only 10% relevant to you because this is simply "popping in to see the parents because you'll be so close anyway".

On your return, re-read some of the advice and let us know how much you really did understand. I'll bet that you'll then agree that most of the advice was 90% relevant, but you only understood 10% of it.

[ryro88]

yes i will defo keep you posted on how my trip pans out. I'amlooking forward to the trip even more now and i'am sure it will be a learning curve for me and a greater insight into thai culture and if It does turn out sour it shall be a lesson learned.

[ryro88]

I have took on board a lot of what has been said and I think the best thing to do will be go and find out for myself.

[kcore]

Go and enjoy the experience . Don't give a flying f..k about what anyone here on TV has to say or what the perception of the GF's village idiots may think! Be yourself and tell no lies. You will be overcome by sadness at the level of poverty you wittiness but, as I was, in awe at how happy the folks are with very little. Their strength and happiness comes from their family. Whose survival is the most important part of your gf' s life. Why shouldn't be? As far as the comments on pimping and prostituting goes......who cares! You enjoy her company for now, enjoy her family and learn about her life in her village. Quite an eye opening experience. Just my opinion.

[ryro88]

That's exactly the approach I plan to take kcore.

[vtjforyou]

Just ignore them !

[seajae]

It is ok to point your feet at things, no problems.

If you drop some money pick it up with your toes.

When you see someone asleep on the floor it is ok to just step over them.

It is traditional to pat people on the head, it is akin to western handshake.

Feet up on the coffee table is just fine.

When first meeting the parents give them a big hug.

No sniff kissing, must be lip kisses.

It is ok eat with your shirt off.

When sitting around on the floor, make sure you sit in the higher position.

Wai everyone you see, especially the kids, it teaches them good manners.

After eating take the dishes away and start cleaning them yourself.

Never, I repeat never put ice in your beer, they are trying to trick you.

Eat food with your left hand.

These are the simple things I remembered to do when I met my ex-wifes family, it wasn't my fault they were racist and didn't like me.

hahahahaha, if you make sure you do not do any of these things you will be ok, every one of them is offensive to Thai people.

[ryro88]

Yes I know they are lol

[khunpa]

Go and enjoy the experience . Don't give a flying f..k about what anyone here on TV has to say or what the perception of the GF's village idiots may think! Be yourself and tell no lies. You will be overcome by sadness at the level of poverty you wittiness but, as I was, in awe at how happy the folks are with very little. Their strength and happiness comes from their family. Whose survival is the most important part of your gf' s life. Why shouldn't be? As far as the comments on pimping and prostituting goes......who cares! You enjoy her company for now, enjoy her family and learn about her life in her village. Quite an eye opening experience. Just my opinion.

Sorry, but I do not find people in the countryside poor at all... and "Yes", I have also been there...

[TheSpade]

Not sure why you feel you need to give them some money for letting you (as their daughters bf) stay at their house. Doubt it's going to cost them anything to give you a place on the floor to sleep.

If they are genuinely hospitable and not just viewing this as an opportunity to make money then reimbursement or cash gifts shouldn't even be crossing their mind.

If you took your gf to meet your parents would they expect cash from her?

[ryro88]

It's a goodwill gesture nothing more nothing less