There was a distinct lack of coconuts where I lived too!!

No horses, no coconuts....

Now where would that be?

Couldn't be the UK, when I was there I used to borrow one of Princess Anne's.

Horses, not coconuts.

I was born and raised within spitting distance of Haydock Park, I tried asking them for a horse but they wouldn't let me have one, and they are a bit too big to steal.

Coconut = Bounty chocolate bar, tried banging two of them together, just got squishy.

If they wouldn't lend a horse to someone who looked like the laughing cavalier I'm not surprised the standards have crashed badly.

I used to stay near Windsor, there was always a stray filly or two hanging around the back of the castle.

yeah...I get out the battery operated clippers once per week and remove the length back to a manageable stubble...not so when I was younger as a wild mass of black hair and beard was always de rigour: 'I shall crush your bourgeios institutions and abuse yer wimminfolk!!!'...

having a beard in saudi is an advantage as the wahabs/salafist types with shaved heads and bristling facial hair figure that yer cool and ye get the odd 'al salaam malaikkum' when normally yer in their cross hairs as a westerner...but I fooled 'em....

where's Prof. Naam? he useta live in Jeddah an' knows what I'm talkin' about...

i know the feeling well - sitting in ras tanura as i type this wearing a 3 week beard. i grow a beard every 6 week swing in saudi (out of laziness), and it definitely gets me a slightly better reception from the locals who as you mentioned are often frosty, sometimes outright hostile. i've tried many times to retain it during my leave at home in thailand, but it never lasts more than 24hours before Mrs Goo sends me to the bathroom with orders to remove it.

i'm a wee bit late but i can confirm Tutsi's and GooEng's impressions. during my time it was a well known fact that a "bare" man could never get a very positive result in negotiations. that's why i adjusted, never regretted and cared a shit that my father roared with laughter when i visited my parents.

picture of my Saudi driver's license in 1978:

Give the appearance of dirty, unpersonable scruffs, however neatly they trim their hairy disguises.

Give me a bare-faced liar every time, rather than these crooks hiding behind facial fungus.

arrogant and nonsensical bullshit²

Give the appearance of dirty, unpersonable scruffs, however neatly they trim their hairy disguises.

Give me a bare-faced liar every time, rather than these crooks hiding behind facial fungus.

arrogant and nonsensical bullshit²

Only once did I attempt to grow a beard. That was in Iran, after my wife and daughter had been flown home with all the other families and I was left dodging the occasional bullet. As I had traded my car for carpets, and they were boxed and on their way to Blighty via a road haulage contractor, I used a pedal-cycle to get round Shiraz and the company bus to get to work - near Persepolis.

This was when the Shah was still in Iran but the bloody frogs were encouraging Khomeini to return, thus buggering up BP. So anyway I had a couple of months of dark gingery facial disfiguration by the time we flew out and when I finally got back to our apartment I rang the bell, my eight-year-old daughter answered the door and burst out laughing. I have never attempted to disguise myself or hide from the world since.

I am me - look me in the eye and you'll see whay you're getting. Not even this fashionable three-day growth that all the 'celebrities' wear. A shave a day keeps you clean, come what may.

They age a person - especially (as in my case) when the browns are too thinly dispersed amongst the greys.

And someone mentioned about razors. Being a Cheap Charlie careful with my spending, I use disposables. Has anyone else noticed that they don't remain sharp as long as they used to (at least in the case of two of the major brands)? Have they got together and agreed to use a weaker formula of metal for that flimsy little strip of blade? Perhaps I should go the full Scrooge and buy a cut-throat and strop...

As my signature suggests, I do use a Mach 3, one blade lasts me at least two months, but I don't shave every day.

I actually had the barber give me a shave when I got my 3 monthly hair cut when I was at home last (don't trust them asian barbers in saudi)...I also got a manicure, pedicure and a massage and I then emerged onto our soi as a new model tutsiwarrior...

the niece then gave me a funny look and I shouted: 'yew get outta here wid yer goddam 11 y.o. impertinence!...'

It was probably more to do with the strange smelling liquid they spray you with tutsi, children are very sensitive to unusual odours.

I usually flee the scene scattering money as soon as he picks the bottle up.

Well....FWIW....I grow the stuff....

Helps to keep the TGs away. . .