Age gap in a relationship, how comfortable are you?

[Thaiberius]

I went to bed with a fat, sweaty, half-drunk woman when I was 23 and she was 43. Essential experience for any young man.

[thehelmsman]

I think most men are comfortable about the girls being 30 years younger or more.... However, doubt the girl deep down feels that good about it.

 

I mean, would you e.g. feel good sleeping with a 55 year old fat, bald, sweaty, half-drunk woman, if you were a 20 year old guy? When I was 20 years old, that was not exactly part of my dreams and fantasies. But maybe times have changed :-)

 

Turn it around and think about it... Would you enjoy it?

 

Hate to break your fantasy world but not all 55 yr. old guys are fat, bald or sweaty. Seen just as many fat and sweaty younger guys.
 

[Thaiberius]

I see some girls with a space hoppa guy in his twenties and wonder how on earth the coital connection is made. Just an observation.

[wilcopops]

To paraphrase John Milton; Man can make a heaven of hell or a hell of heaven in his mind.
 
Are you happy with your partner? Yes? Then enjoy and who cares what other people think. If your partner is there for different reasons than you. IT DOES NOT MATTER!!!!
 
For those of you that are offended by large age differences. WE DON'T CARE. I am offended by socks and sandals but I don't write a post about it nor do I spend time worrying about it.
 
Every person on this planet is diferent and life is too short. Carpe Diem

Never mind the MAN what about the WOMAN?

It seems just about every one on thisbthreadbis only concerned with the male's part in this.

[thailiketoo]

 

To paraphrase John Milton; Man can make a heaven of hell or a hell of heaven in his mind.
 
Are you happy with your partner? Yes? Then enjoy and who cares what other people think. If your partner is there for different reasons than you. IT DOES NOT MATTER!!!!
 
For those of you that are offended by large age differences. WE DON'T CARE. I am offended by socks and sandals but I don't write a post about it nor do I spend time worrying about it.
 
Every person on this planet is diferent and life is too short. Carpe Diem

Never mind the MAN what about the WOMAN?

It seems just about every one on thisbthreadbis only concerned with the male's part in this.

 

 

The OP, "Age gap in a relationship, how comfortable are you."  If you are a man you talk about men if you are a woman you talk about women, that is the topic? Are you a woman?  If so it would be nice to hear your opinion. 

 

If you are a man, give us a man's viewpoint. 

Edited July 31, 2014 by thailiketoo

[wilcopops]

I think most men are comfortable about the girls being 30 years younger or more.... However, doubt the girl deep down feels that good about it.
 
I mean, would you e.g. feel good sleeping with a 55 year old fat, bald, sweaty, half-drunk woman, if you were a 20 year old guy? When I was 20 years old, that was not exactly part of my dreams and fantasies. But maybe times have changed :-)
 
Turn it around and think about it... Would you enjoy it?

 
Hate to break your fantasy world but not all 55 yr. old guys are fat, bald or sweaty. Seen just as many fat and sweaty younger guys.
 

I hope you aren't part of that substantial body of men in their 50s and over who so deluded that they really think they aren't overweight and sweaty..... If course many of them were always like that.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

........., you cant put lipstick on the pig.

Where is PigeonJake when you need him?

[alyx]

Well, if we are talking about genuine relationships, there is no way to feel uncomfortable with any age gap, however wide it could be.
The fact is that the world is made of billions of different people who get attracted to each other for whatever reasons....fat, skinny, bald, sweaty, old, young.....
It is not the couple who is at fault but the biased eye of the witness, burdened by the culture the were brought in.
Of course, as a twenty year old person I would never have been able to "mate" with someone in their thirties, let alone in their fifties.
I have reached that age, and still can't. I stick to the younger ones.
I would be seventy, I would still feel comfortable with the (greater) age gap: no one is forcing anyone into any relashionship so why the "guilt" as long as the couple find happiness with what they have, and what they get. Edited July 31, 2014 by alyx

[2008bangkok]

5-10 yrs max is ok anything more and what you gonna talk about (as if it's not hard enough anyway)
On the other hand if like to be 60 and havin a 20 yr old

[pgrahmm]

My prior gal was 59 - had a smokin' hot body (think 25-30) as she worked out a few hours every day and had a nice face.....that said - she was a bitcher and a fault finder and clinger and it lasted about 4 months - if she had the personality of my wife (much younger then me) I would have been happy that way also.

 

It just happens the my wife and I match well and she happens to be younger........

 

I'll take happiness over unhappiness and comdemnation any day - regardless the source.....

Edited July 31, 2014 by pgrahmm

[Sigurris]

I feel the need to throw myself at the mercy of my fellow forumeers.

 

OK so here goes. My gf is 25 years younger than me. She is an Esan girl without a degree. She does not have Chinese heritage nor does she have connections. She works in a hotel earning in a month what I earn in just over a day. She has never been outside Thailand and knows little of the world. Her last room did not have air con.

 

I live in 140 sq metres of luxury by the beach. I do have a degree (a couple in fact) and would consider myself intelligent, travelled and cultured.

 

What do we have in common? Not much. We are never going to discuss Hamas terrorism or whether William Blake was a visionary. I learnt long ago that I need to look elsewhere for intellectual stimulation. Thats why we have friends folks!

 

What attracts her to me? I suspect the fact that her standard of living has shot through the roof is a factor. And that her future is going to be alot more comfortable than her past. But, call me niave, deluded or plain stupid, I also think that she likes the fact that I get up in the morning to take her to work, I cook for her, I treat her with respect, I don't cheat on her and I don't lie.

 

What attracts her to me? Well the smoking hot body and beautiful face do play a role! Certainly thats what hooked me in the beginning. But as time has worn on I love the fact that her being around is nice, I am comfortable in her presence and she has never asked me for a penny and insists on working despite the low wages.

 

Is she playing me? I don't know. I don't think so but I won't know for sure until it happens. So how do I safeguard myself? I don't. I trust her. She trusts me. We enjoy being together.

 

Is this the defence of someone who has seen the haters eyes? No. Just thought I would my version of my relationship. Please judge me, those who would judge. I hope it makes you feel even more superior as you live your life of quiet desperation. Me? I don't care. And when I curl up on the sofa tonight spooning that cute little bod I will care even less.

[thailiketoo]

I feel the need to throw myself at the mercy of my fellow forumeers.

 

OK so here goes. My gf is 25 years younger than me. She is an Esan girl without a degree. She does not have Chinese heritage nor does she have connections. She works in a hotel earning in a month what I earn in just over a day. She has never been outside Thailand and knows little of the world. Her last room did not have air con.

 

I live in 140 sq metres of luxury by the beach. I do have a degree (a couple in fact) and would consider myself intelligent, travelled and cultured.

 

What do we have in common? Not much. We are never going to discuss Hamas terrorism or whether William Blake was a visionary. I learnt long ago that I need to look elsewhere for intellectual stimulation. Thats why we have friends folks!

 

What attracts her to me? I suspect the fact that her standard of living has shot through the roof is a factor. And that her future is going to be alot more comfortable than her past. But, call me niave, deluded or plain stupid, I also think that she likes the fact that I get up in the morning to take her to work, I cook for her, I treat her with respect, I don't cheat on her and I don't lie.

 

What attracts her to me? Well the smoking hot body and beautiful face do play a role! Certainly thats what hooked me in the beginning. But as time has worn on I love the fact that her being around is nice, I am comfortable in her presence and she has never asked me for a penny and insists on working despite the low wages.

 

Is she playing me? I don't know. I don't think so but I won't know for sure until it happens. So how do I safeguard myself? I don't. I trust her. She trusts me. We enjoy being together.

 

Is this the defence of someone who has seen the haters eyes? No. Just thought I would my version of my relationship. Please judge me, those who would judge. I hope it makes you feel even more superior as you live your life of quiet desperation. Me? I don't care. And when I curl up on the sofa tonight spooning that cute little bod I will care even less.

 

The above post is a great example. The poster writes,  "Is she playing me? I don't know. I don't think so but I won't know for sure until it happens. So how do I safeguard myself? I don't. I trust her. She trusts me. We enjoy being together."

 

Many other posters write something like Briggsy wrote, "There are many sensible posts in this thread but also many replete with self-delusion along the lines of "my girlfriend whose age is 40% of mine truly loves me for who I am."

 

I asked him to produce one of the many written.  Well guess what?  No response.  May I suggest the above post by Sigurris is the typical Thai Visa's older posters mind set.  "Is she playing me? I don't know. I don't think so."

 

The anti age people like to imagine that all us old fellows smell bad, are alcoholics bald and fat with no spendable income that are taken in by Thai women's tales or tails as the case may be.  Hardly reality.

 

The above post by Sigurris is a typical, rational older gentleman enjoying life in Thailand with a young Thai woman. 

 

It is easy to figure.  Retired guys get more bang for the buck in Thailand in many areas such as housing, medical costs, hair cuts and so on.  But, to think we don't know what is going on is not accurate.  After 70 years of relationships with women from mom to meow ain't nobody in Thailand going to get my cherry; that was done a long time ago. 
 

[brewsterbudgen]

Is it necessarily a man/woman thing? Don't older gay men also prefer younger partners?

[David48]

Is it necessarily a man/woman thing? Don't older gay men also prefer younger partners?

 

You could always ask them here ... http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/730151-asians-vs-westerners

.

 

[JLCrab]

One of the guys wrote above that he and his wife get along so well that they spend 90+ % of their time together. Me and the Thai GF get along so well because we spend close to 90% of the time apart even if close by. 

[Somsrisonphimai]

To each his own; I personally find immensely more value/personal profit in a relationship with someone who shares some of my "headspace", as it were, than a young girl with a fine pussy who does nothing but play with her mobai. But there's room for everything here, so to each his own. You're right in that there is less BS. It's all a little bit of give and take, really.

Put me down for the "young pussy" please.

Then you must have either the looks, the cash, or the personality :)

[AlexRRR]

If it feels good....

 

besides less loose marb

[Somsrisonphimai]

One of the guys wrote above that he and his wife get along so well that they spend 90+ % of their time together. Me and the Thai GF get along so well because we spend close to 90% of the time apart even if close by.

So is that mean you guys don't have much thing in common?

[AlexRRR]

If it feels good....

 

besides less loose marb

 

ahhhh pc played up as i was typing....

 

 

besides less loose marbles in a young head

[JLCrab]

 

One of the guys wrote above that he and his wife get along so well that they spend 90+ % of their time together. Me and the Thai GF get along so well because we spend close to 90% of the time apart even if close by.

So is that mean you guys don't have much thing in common?

 

So couples who spend lots of time together have lots in common or they just spend lots of time together?

[Somsrisonphimai]

Is it necessarily a man/woman thing? Don't older gay men also prefer younger partners?

Gay men or straight men, they have one thing in common, and you know what...

[Fellini]

I personally don't see anything undignified at all about a large age difference in a relationship. The only conditions I stipulate are that the man should not be physically infirm or impotent, and that the woman should have reached a certain level of physical and mental maturity.

But when a relationship borders on hebephilia, it can get weird. Nothing is more disgusting than a spoiled little Oreo cookie-eating brat just lying there, frigid like a dead starfish, when you diddle her. I've no idea what was going through James Mason's mind (or Errol Flynn's, for that matter...):
 

Edited July 31, 2014 by Fellini

[Somsrisonphimai]

One of the guys wrote above that he and his wife get along so well that they spend 90+ % of their time together. Me and the Thai GF get along so well because we spend close to 90% of the time apart even if close by.

So is that mean you guys don't have much thing in common?

So couples who spend lots of time together have lots in common or they just spend lots of time together?

Why do they if they don't have thing in common? It does not make to spend a lot of time together but have nothing in common. I would think it would be bored for the other person.

[JLCrab]

I would guess it more likely, if they spend lots of time together, they are both bored -- I have things I like to do that certainly don't interest her and she goes to school and hangs out with her Thai friends in which I take no interest. So we enjoy our time together when we each put those things aside.

[Fellini]

I would guess it more likely, if they spend lots of time together, they are both bored -- I have things I like to do that certainly don't interest her and she goes to school and hangs out with her Thai friends in which I take no interest. So we enjoy our time together when we each put those things aside.

 

Fine. But I never saw the point in relationships in which both (or more) parties have totally convergent interests or clashing personalities. It's doomed to failure.

I think it's absolutely compulsory that my girlfriend must get high, watch cheap sleaze films, and play Call of Duty: Ghosts with me from time to time.

Edited July 31, 2014 by Fellini

[JLCrab]

5 years so far.

[metisdead]

Posts and replies in violation of the following forum rule have been removed:

 

8) You will not post disruptive or inflammatory messages, vulgarities, obscenities or profanities.

[Fellini]

 

It should be the ideal all the time 555

I just think that if the couple don't have much thing in common, the relationship may not last long. I knew couple who went separate way because they had nothing in common.

 

 

Yes, absolutely. It's not like I'm asking for a girl who is my perfect clone, but with a second X chromosome. She just has to have some things in common with me. One thing I don't tolerate is prudishness. That's one of the most important things: not being such a goody-goody and acting cool.

Edited July 31, 2014 by Fellini

[JLCrab]

I think the notion that to have a successful relationship, especially with a big age difference and cultural background and in this case I'm the one who speaks her language and not v.v., that they both have to enjoy golf or backgammon or some structured activity they can do together is highly overrated. 

[Fellini]

I think the notion that to have a successful relationship, especially with a big age difference and cultural background and in this case I'm the one who speaks her language and not v.v., that they both have to enjoy golf or backgammon or some structured activity they can do together is highly overrated. 

 

Sure, I agree. Backgammon, golf, miniature models, Minecraft, and gardening are ridiculous ways to keep a relationship together. But when you take away all that you have in common, all you have left is a casual...  'love'-box. Which is fine, but doesn't really fit the definition of a conventional monogamous relationship.