Wife changed when she got back to the village

[loppylugs1]

Your wife hasnt changed at all.

Her true colours were on display from the very start, for some reason known only to you, you either chose to ingnore the warning signals and red flags or were so blinded by love you couldnt see them.

This is true. Lets see 65,your child 3 not many options left. Social services in UK will be involved for sure if you have no other family,child up for adoption pretty rapidly.

Crap.............

Agree with Transam, if you have a 3yo at 65, every chance you can make it to 85 in the UK.

You'll get extra money in Child benefit and child tax credit, help with housing.

Social services should be very supportive.

You could well see the boy through university.

PS

I have a 3yo too (I'm 60), Thai mum is bonkers (as usual) but manageable, mainly because I refuse to go anywhere near her village or grasping relatives.

Yeah right! how old was momma and papa when they died 130 140

[Bernard Flint]

How could such a situation arise ? Seems to happen regular.

wife 30 or 40 years younger than the husband, money runs out. Wifey has no need of farang daddy with no money as she already has a Thai daddy with no money.

I wouldn't go back to the village if I were you. Didn't she threaten to kill you already ?

where has he mentioned his wife,s age?????

[metisdead]

Some offensive posts have been removed.

[hiller]

Seems to me the wife had enough of you.

Go back to her, be sincere with her and promise her you will change your attitude towards her.

A good thing also is to get a bunch of nice flowers for her.

Good Luck to you.

Costas2008 - Providing fresh flowers and legal advice for all of Issan.

[HooHaa]

yup, she made it clear you are unwelcome bugger off back home with your son.

that is what i would have said, however your age certainly limits your options.

How old is the wife out of curiosity?

irrespective of her age, i still cannot fathom why so many here marry these women of a rural background whose culture, priorities and upbringing are so far beyond their understanding.

sadly now the child pays the price

Edited March 28, 2015 by HooHaa

[HooHaa]

Your wife hasnt changed at all.

Her true colours were on display from the very start, for some reason known only to you, you either chose to ingnore the warning signals and red flags or were so blinded by love you couldnt see them.

This is true. Lets see 65,your child 3 not many options left. Social services in UK will be involved for sure if you have no other family,child up for adoption pretty rapidly.

Crap.............

Agree with Transam, if you have a 3yo at 65, every chance you can make it to 85 in the UK.

You'll get extra money in Child benefit and child tax credit, help with housing.

Social services should be very supportive.

You could well see the boy through university.

PS

I have a 3yo too (I'm 60), Thai mum is bonkers (as usual) but manageable, mainly because I refuse to go anywhere near her village or grasping relatives.

one must wonder if it is the thai woman who is bonkers (as usual) or the farang gentleman who is delusional.

I go for option number 2.

[loppylugs1]

I would not leave my dog here never mind a son,and to that end I would like to thank Royal Norwegian airways for a much appreciated cheap quote for helping me and the wuffers for a way out of this hellhole

Least the dogs are not ting tong,think that's why the Thais quite like them,they are smarter

[roo860]

The guy's not replied to any of the advice so far, I think I will call the police, she's probably topped him already, they will say its suicide, so not really worth the effort!

[Derek M]

If you put the bird in a cage, you are forcing it to stay close to you, but then it is no bird anymore, and on the other side you never know if the birds really wants to stay with you. The only thing that you do is trying to ensure that "your problem" which is that the bird flies away from you, never reappears. The bird will never be happy in this way, and you neither because you know that the feeling is not true.

If you let the bird fly free and open up the cage, you will give it the opportunity to have freedom, if then the bird comes back to you, you know that it really wants to stay with you, that the feeling is true and you never need to have the fear that the bird flies away from you, because you know that it can choose to stay or to go. If it prefers to stay then you can be happy,the feeling is true and the bird isn't searching for something else, it's happy with you.

If it don't stays with you then you know that it wasn't worth it, and you don't need to waste your time trying to conquer the heart of the bird while it is closed in a prison. Give love and get it back. Give freedom and you get it back ( in this case you give phisical freedom and get back mental freedom , think about it )

[slipperylobster]

Sounds horrible. Go be happy somewhere else. Refrain from making babies at your age, and just enjoy life. I went through 17 years of hell, trying to see my Asian son. I stuck around and lived like a mud rat, while she made me miserable with threats. I had to fight hard, just to see him. Now she just passed away from cancer and he is living with relatives, for his final year of support. I see him just a few weeks a year, but we are very close. He told me, the week after she died, that she had a husband for eight years (I never thought that he had a stepfather). She dressed him in Private school uniforms and sent grades to me, that were all fictitious. (He lost 3 years of school). Now I am trying to get him a high school diploma (accelerated learning at home). He is fluent in english, and very smart and mature for his age. Now we are both happy. We chat weekly, and he will get to the states (us citizen). I see the light at the end of the tunnel....

I am sixty...swearing off babies. Time to enjoy.

[Aussieroaming]

What a crap situation but you need to reflect in whether this is a one off tantrum or full fledged mutiny. If it's the latter then make her walk the plank

[mogandave]

It is amazing how many people can make their minds up hearing one side of a story.

Pathetic.

[elgordo38]

Seems to me the wife had enough of you.

Go back to her, be sincere with her and promise her you will change your attitude towards her.

A good thing also is to get a bunch of nice flowers for her.

Good Luck to you.

Sorry Costas I think she should change her attitude. She returned to her home village and did a 360 degree turn on him. A bunch of flowers will change nothing. I ran into the same problem moving from Chiang Mai to a village in Phitsanulok and lasted a year before cutting the cord and returning to sanity. I suggest he do the same. He is outnumbered by her and her family its a loose, loose proposition for him.

[rgs2001uk]

Sounds horrible. Go be happy somewhere else. Refrain from making babies at your age, and just enjoy life. I went through 17 years of hell, trying to see my Asian son. I stuck around and lived like a mud rat, while she made me miserable with threats. I had to fight hard, just to see him. Now she just passed away from cancer and he is living with relatives, for his final year of support. I see him just a few weeks a year, but we are very close. He told me, the week after she died, that she had a husband for eight years (I never thought that he had a stepfather). She dressed him in Private school uniforms and sent grades to me, that were all fictitious. (He lost 3 years of school). Now I am trying to get him a high school diploma (accelerated learning at home). He is fluent in english, and very smart and mature for his age. Now we are both happy. We chat weekly, and he will get to the states (us citizen). I see the light at the end of the tunnel....

I am sixty...swearing off babies. Time to enjoy.

He told me, the week after she died, that she had a husband for eight years (I never thought that he had a stepfather).

Here in Thailand he is usually referred to as "the brother"

[rgs2001uk]

It is amazing how many people can make their minds up hearing one side of a story.

Pathetic.

I think many of us can put two and two together.

I will wager he didnt meet her in the Central Business District of Bankok whilst completing a transaction upstairs in the Premium lonunge of the HSBC.

Lie down with dogs you will catch fleas.

[fitzcaraldo]

Only one word of advice for the young lads of 50 years old plus : vasectomy

[mjcmjc]

Seems to me the wife had enough of you.

Go back to her, be sincere with her and promise her you will change your attitude towards her.

A good thing also is to get a bunch of nice flowers for her.

Good Luck to you.

If you take the advice above, it may work for a week or month then she will do something similar again and you will end up going round in ever increasing nasty circles.

It sounds like you tried, it didn't work, your 65 and don't need this stress. Get away now even though it may hurt.

[zzdocxx]

She actually threatened to kill you, and said that her family backed her up on this ?

[ScarpoFongness4U]

Get the son out of harms way

If she threatened to kill you, then your son is your extension, he is not safe

Boys are sold to slavery too, especially light skinned and blonde

Don't play games

Negotiate from the UK and raise him yourself

He is 3

Won't even remember his mother

[ScarpoFongness4U]

Get the son out of harms way

If she threatened to kill you, then your son is your extension, he is not safe

Boys are sold to slavery too, especially light skinned and blonde

Don't play games

Negotiate from the UK and raise him yourself

He is 3

Won't even remember his mother

[ScarpoFongness4U]

you dont understand her mentality? to be honest i dont understand your mentality allowing her so much control and allowing her to abuse that control to the detriment of your relationship with her, your marriage, your son and your own life and finances. but that's in the past.

the marriage is finished and you would be a fool to invest any more money in it even if you feel up to investing more emotion in it.

if your son has british citizenship and you feel you can take care of him in the UK then take him there.

if he has thai citizenship then he'll be staying here. and you have to decide if you are staying or not.

Does not matter if he thinks he can take care of his son, he brought the boy into the world and now MUST raise him alone, away from the rape and torture and ultimate sex slave trade she will sell him too

What is wrong with you people who advise him otherwise

If the kid has a passport from UK, leave today

Immigration has no authority to stop him, yet

[DogNo1]

There's a paucity of information here. Do you have other wives and other children? Is there some reason that you couldn't return to the UK and live happily there? Would your conscience be clear if you left your boy with his mother in the village? I sense that there might be some complications regarding your return to the UK. I advise that you go to someplace where you will be safe and unstressed and can plan a good future for yourself and your boy. Good luck!

[Pheat123]

people here really think a 65 year old running away to the UK with a 3 year old is a long term solution?

you realize that this is illegal and kidnapping, correct?

OP made his bed and now has to sleep in it. The village might not be ideal but the boy will not starve to death.

If OP cares for his son he needs to work hard to get back into the graces of his wife.

I am sure we are not getting the full story.

I am sure the story is not this one-sided.

I am sure OP is not a saint.

Perhaps self reflection would be helpful.

If OP cares for his son he needs to work hard to get back into the graces of his wife.

Are you some sort of retard?

His wife has threatened to have him killed

You advise to get back in her good graces

Would you like to purchase a 3 legged donkey?

[Ayutthaya11]

If someone especially a hot tempered Thai threatens to kill you I would take it serious. Leave, try take the boy with you. Is he a UK Citizen? (Born there). Speak with the embassy for advice on that.

Edited March 28, 2015 by Ashley1982

[Ayutthaya11]

If someone especially a hot tempered Thai threatens to kill you I would take it serious. Leave, try take the boy with you. Is he a UK Citizen? (Born there). Speak with the embassy for advice on that.

Or of course, just do a runner

[BKKdreaming]

I would not think you are getting the kid out of BKK you will be stopped at the airport and asked for her permission papers ,

If you can get him a UK passport do it....

how about paying a middle class Thai family to take care of him ,

The boy will be well taken care of if you pay well .

if she said she will kill you I would never go back to the village again, and I would not let here know where you live

But I must say , you are either blind or stupid to not see that something like this was going to happen ,

if you only posted 10% of the BS there had to be tons more.

We get pulled into a lot of problems because westerners care about their kids, not going to say all Thai guys but many just walk away,

Good Luck , Check and see if you can legally take your son out of Thailand and if not find him a safe place to grow up

[mogandave]

Get the son out of harms way

If she threatened to kill you, then your son is your extension, he is not safe

Boys are sold to slavery too, especially light skinned and blonde

Don't play games

Negotiate from the UK and raise him yourself

He is 3

Won't even remember his mother

And when he is 20 he will likely have no father.

[meatboy]

Seems to me the wife had enough of you.

Go back to her, be sincere with her and promise her you will change your attitude towards her.

A good thing also is to get a bunch of nice flowers for her.

Good Luck to you.

your first line i agree with you,

but the rest ? give her a good smack in the gob and get the hell out of thailand[with your son] as he will never have a life.

[malt25]

OP, where are you ? You gone MIA ?

3+ pages of replies to your post & not a peep out of you ?

Just saying..... Cheers..... Mal.

[benalibina]

It is all in the family.