500,000 dilemna

[mango66]

It seems it was the OP's idea to "improve" his in-law's home and not theirs and they like it just fine, thank you. If his wife wants to be a dutiful daughter and take care of her parents, then the best way to do this as a compromise would be for the OP to secure a house near the in-laws that he can outfit as his own private castle for his family and wifey can be close enough to spend several hours a day with her parents. It's not like she needs to be with them 24/7 since a sister and other relatives are living in the house with them.

That's basically what Hubby and I did with my parents when they got older and I thought I needed to check up on them several times weekly. We moved them to a little house close to ours, but not in the same house. My marriage wouldn't have survived us being under the same roof.

The home is my wife's when her parents. Not the in-laws. The in-laws had begun building their home next door but then stopped work on their home and tricked the parents to give them a loan using our land so they could buy a new car.

Now the in-laws home is unfinished and they are living in my wife's home with the parents. I firmly believe they are the sole cause of the father stopping me from continuing to build as the inlaw sister opposes being moved to the upstairs room during construction

You can not be sure the house will be your wifs house,

I pretty sure the real trouble is her sister and her husband propably too;

They want kick you out !

They want both houses, the new one propably for their kids in future;

I now I think its all power on your wife ! sorry for her:

She have to make clear to her parents:

a) you get your rooms, and they get agreed with re-arrange of the house ,

or she will get out of the house and you will go somewhere to rent or buy something ( financial ? );

you could go back if her parents would get old and need more help,

THAN you will see the trouth - her sister want grap the parents house too,

orshe would move really to their house, which they might not finish for reason to keep you away !!

c) So if your wife can agree, take the chance and go for your own house and family !!

My hint: I speak from similar experiance - we stayed - you will never have your really own family like

we understand it in western life ( EU );

In a thai family - you will even share your underwear - beleave me !!!

Make your own family as you like - on your rules - you will be happy !

and visit her family as often as you can from your health - and they want !!

( I also did live with my wife and 2 childrens in 18m2 in a town house which I bought for my wife,

but Thai family: The sister had to have its own room with bath,

the parents same, later father in law even existed that his wife sleep in another room,

so we had to maintain a store and spare room - maybee we thought when kids grow up, for her;

Meantime 1 sucess, kids sleep with sister when i am in home,

so I have after about 8 years - My bedroom with my wife,

on the other side I really enjoy the narrow space to have a very intensive live with my kids !!

Even the boy is more related to his Grandfather - for 5 years he called him father,

and said thid farong is his Uncle :-(( !

When I tried to buy an separate house, to have my own live with my own family,

( my wife would still have supported her parents financial ,

the family denied - also my wife,

she thought her younger sister not honest enough to take care the parents when getting ols,

So we " like to stay " in our family home,

but ever when I have the chance, we go with my kids to a weekendhouse which we builded up

meantime 100 km out of BKK;

So my tip for you :

If you cant get an satisfied agreement with Parents, and which sister accepts in 1 month ,

leave and do your family home!

good luck !!

[mango66]

Turn of events: Today I went to the house and started loading concrete, wood, doors, and all of out personal belongings into the truck.

Arguments insured with wife and her father and a different sister who lives behind the house and who also has done nothing to show bad and even likes our plan to remodel the family house.

By the time I had loaded my truck beyond capacity, father had a change of heart/thinking. Now I an told that I can do what I planned with the house minus the one room the eldest sister lives in. A 3x3 meter room.

I told the wife to explain that her room is still open to the dust and webs is still open to everything else. So they agreed to let me seal her room since this sister is a pig that is lazy to clean.

To me this seems like I was being tested by the father and everyone to see if I would bend to their wishes. If so, then, I have won.

Or, could it be that they have seen that I was serious to take my wife and kids far away from them forever because of their stubbornness?

Either way! They have succumbed to my plan. What problems lie for me in the future can only be imagined now.

I think my next move is to get that eldest sister to really hate being in my home so she will do anything to leave on her own. Maybe then I can find happiness with my wife and 2 babies.

You won...this time.

But you won what exactly? The right to spend your money fixing up the parents house that has a loan against it, for ungrateful parents and a pig of sister and her lazy husband. Good win.

You should have driven that loaded truck out the front gate and made them beg you to come back. Made the sister clear the lien before you spend one more baht on that house or the bank may own a nice house. You gave in far too quickly. You were in a position to dictate terms and you blew it.

I could not imagine waking up each morning wondering what stress I had to face that day. I feel for you because I know how horrible a situation like this must be. You sound like a good guy just trying to do the right thing. But you live in a nest of vipers and I just don't think anything good is going to come of this,

Wish you luck...but it's not to late to change your mind and roll on out.

Well said.. he caved in now I hope he gets what he deserved.Weak and spineless..And they know it.

Thai in-laws -1(WON)

Disabled idiot ATM machine farang slave-0

Dear Vallon !

So stup.... you can write only,

if you never had a family, wife, kids which you love !!

[lovelomsak]

Turn of events: Today I went to the house and started loading concrete, wood, doors, and all of out personal belongings into the truck.

Arguments insured with wife and her father and a different sister who lives behind the house and who also has done nothing to show bad and even likes our plan to remodel the family house.

By the time I had loaded my truck beyond capacity, father had a change of heart/thinking. Now I an told that I can do what I planned with the house minus the one room the eldest sister lives in. A 3x3 meter room.

I told the wife to explain that her room is still open to the dust and webs is still open to everything else. So they agreed to let me seal her room since this sister is a pig that is lazy to clean.

To me this seems like I was being tested by the father and everyone to see if I would bend to their wishes. If so, then, I have won.

Or, could it be that they have seen that I was serious to take my wife and kids far away from them forever because of their stubbornness?

Either way! They have succumbed to my plan. What problems lie for me in the future can only be imagined now.

I think my next move is to get that eldest sister to really hate being in my home so she will do anything to leave on her own. Maybe then I can find happiness with my wife and 2 babies.

You are setting yourself up for only more problems. If you stay they will see you as someone they can manipulate.Emotional blackmail will be their tool. You have nothing to gain by staying and a lot to lose. Leave it behind you or prepare to be treated like a whipped dog.

As far as the eldest sister goes she will she will win in any and all things you try to do to get rid of her.

I was going to say I would send you a shovel to dig the hole you are in faster but I think a backhoe is more appropriate in this case.

Good luck

Edited May 12, 2015 by lovelomsak

[Toscano]

I have read so many opinions that all say move out and get your own place , whether bought , rented or built on land purchased . Let the wife's parents

stew and the sister can look after them . I agree with all of them . My wife had her own house before I came , her children wer both adult and living away from home . I would never have moved in with parents or any in-laws .

I can understand the anger and frustration you are going through . My wife's sister was left a house and land by her mother , sandwiched between out house and another the other side , it was originally a shop . My sister-in-law decided to move it back as they have land behind , to have more space in front to make a garden .

They hoisted the upper part of the house with chains and slid it back about 5mts together with its concrete pillars . Instead of bedding the pillars in

fresh holes , they have seated them on the original house tiled floor , thus raising the level of the house two feet . They have covered all with dumped

earth right up to our wall , 2ft up our wall , upon which they now plan to put concrete . I have protested loudly , unfortunately I was in hospital with a

heart attack when the earth was dumped . My wife is as insensed as I am , but sends me to try to reason with her sister and brother-in-law , because she

doesn't want to have a family argument . I have consistently asked for the earth to be removed from our , to which sister replies it's my

land , when relative to our wall her land is 2ft down at the base of the wall . I was prepared to hire men to remove the earth at my expense ; futher they previously infilled an open ditch where the rainwater soaked away and put an uderground pipe which is too small to take the rainwater from the original

party drain that served both our houses . I was going to buy much bigger pipes to easily take the water away . I did already buy them a fibreglass septic

tank . I am very angry , my wife is upset too , says we'll soon be dead and can't take the house with us . I'm concerned for her daughter and son-in-law

who will inherit one day . We think we may move to another house my wife owns which we built for her son , but is effectively unlived in ; but I have spent a lot of money here to create a comfortable gentleman's residence .

[Linzz]

AS already suggested you should just take the loss and leave

If possible cancel whatever contracts you have agreed to, even if it means taking a loss

This situation will not be improved

You have been accommodating and you are paying for it

Seems her family is not being very appreciative

This trend will continue if not it will get worse

Agree with this post. Gather your family together and quit out of there. Your wife understands you and gets blamed because she does. They don't like or respect you. There are other family members to take care of the parents. Reverse the whole story and recover as much money as you can. With your disability you have enough to worry about. Just care for you and yours but make sure your wife is with you every step of the way because at the end of the day it's only her that matters. Refuse to be part of this cultural exploitation and leave them all to it. They will see your value when you've gone. You will wonder why you didn't do it sooner.....

[Tony125]

How would the sister buy a car with wife's deed to land ? You are missing something here. Some how you insulted the father here and you need to figure out how. did you sit down with dad and show him the plan and get his OK or did you leave it to your wife ? Unfortunately there is a big misunderstanding here and your not going to win. Dad nailing the window shut is a pretty strong statement . time to move on

Let's see! Um the land is in her fathers name and will be inherited by my wife. The sister bypassed the father and sneakily went to the bank with her mother who the banks considers being the same as the father in property ownership.

The father not only saw the plans but talked with many architects that we brought to asses the idea until we finally found one that we hired. So the father knew. It wasn't until the eldest sister started crying to her father about the inconveniences our plans were causing that he tried to stop me. Which leads to your next statement. The father told me the say before to stop painting. When my wife told me I ignored her out of frustration so the next day the father nailed the window shut to make sure I would stop painting there. There was a big misunderstanding for sure. The sister thinks she can make demands in my house and that she is boss there. She thinks that since she spent her money buying a new car that we accept this and will allow her to tell us what to do with our house. She has misunderstood farang determination and our understanding of priorities .

You are extremely naive. You say " the sister thinks she can make demands in my house " Its not your house ! Makes no difference that the father promises to give house to her when he and mother dies will can be changed at any time especially if you piss them off. If the father dies first what prevents the sister to convince the mom to give her the house like she got her to give her the loan? Plus any upgrades you do to the house for them is a gift does not entitle you to ownership check with a lawyer if you think I am wrong.

[slipperylobster]

I would like to thank all for their replies.

It has helped me to decide to pack my stuff and get the heck out of there.

I just hope i can get money back from all the tile and blocks and bathroom furnishings that have been purchased to cut some of my losses.

I know already in doing this all that I will be the bad foreigner now to her family. My wife is insistent that I allow the construction work on one addition to be completed but I am refusing to do even this now. I figure if the family had shown me some kind of decency then they deserve as much in return buy since they have chosen to change and are refusing to make space for me that I am no longer obligated to complete any work started. Perhaps I am doing it simply because I am angry at the losses this has incurred and the Thainess that has led to this action. Today I go get everything from that house that we bought and own. Everything down to the last brick that has not been laid.

If I ever get kicked out by the family, I will take everything I bought to the second hand shop, not because I want the money, but just for the satisfaction of denying them the use of it.

Remember to grab the machete and pistols first.....for pawn.

[joshstiles]

the answer to your question isxway to obvious...

anyone who lives with their in-laws is an idiot and deserves all the misery they get (no matter what country you are in)

ask yourself...should i stick this needle in my eye?

yeah...go ahead...learn something

[oneday]

Hi, first of all i would like to say that i feel sorry for you, and second, all this is excactly the same as what happend with me, i do live in thai 15 years non stop. I would like to write a long story here to help you give some advice, but i am alreaddy writing a book at the moment about my life in thai, gues this book will never have a end, but hey! Im here to help in give you some support.

what i did was wrong, I did stay inside the house, but all problems will just grow towards an explosion inside the family.

The best you can do, not even belive your wife, get a rental house and let them find there own trouble first. Never share with family in thai. And never buy something on a other name than yourself. Keep your money behind, tell everyone your pour. If you buy , rent, or build something / even invest something, get it on contract with pictures and or videos. Record agreements! Make pictures, foto copy ID, documentation of all you agree to. Keep it all very safe. I did get the advice from a thai lawyer, witch saves my life right now. I have been sucked dry, i have been scamed for millions, just becouse a good "wife" , and becouse i could not speak thai. Thank god i can speak it better than english now. thai will be thai, never change. Never close your eyes, and always follow your brains, becouse even the heart can fool you.

Wish you good luck, be strong man!

OP, I could not agree with Remi080 more. This family has already shown its colors and they aren't going to change. You may have won this little battle, but do you really want many more battles in the years to come. I wouldn't. Get out now and keep loading up the truck.

...but I know you won't.

[AlexRRR]

Wasn't ever a good idea to renovate if you guys needed to be or wanted to be close to mum and dad you should of funded a new house on wife's land the half a million would have got you peace and security as long as you went to a lawyer first and got that 30 year lease.

And before you say half a million wouldn't be enough BS, careful planning with good design is all that's needed, Thai style you know, you don't live in the west anymore.

As a footnote I know where your coming from but hey your living in a different culture now, if wife wants to have a chat with parents fine but I'd be looking to move out cut my losses and return materials not used, actions do speak louder than words who knows it might have a positive affect on the matter, but keep that smile on your face and keep your mouth shut especially to your wife I'm sure she is stressed enough the last thing you want to do is force her to make a choice, of course to move out you will need your wife's 100% backing or your stuck in the poo buddy.

[thesetat2013]

Hi, first of all i would like to say that i feel sorry for you, and second, all this is excactly the same as what happend with me, i do live in thai 15 years non stop. I would like to write a long story here to help you give some advice, but i am alreaddy writing a book at the moment about my life in thai, gues this book will never have a end, but hey! Im here to help in give you some support.

what i did was wrong, I did stay inside the house, but all problems will just grow towards an explosion inside the family.

The best you can do, not even belive your wife, get a rental house and let them find there own trouble first. Never share with family in thai. And never buy something on a other name than yourself. Keep your money behind, tell everyone your pour. If you buy , rent, or build something / even invest something, get it on contract with pictures and or videos. Record agreements! Make pictures, foto copy ID, documentation of all you agree to. Keep it all very safe. I did get the advice from a thai lawyer, witch saves my life right now. I have been sucked dry, i have been scamed for millions, just becouse a good "wife" , and becouse i could not speak thai. Thank god i can speak it better than english now. thai will be thai, never change. Never close your eyes, and always follow your brains, becouse even the heart can fool you.

Wish you good luck, be strong man!

OP, I could not agree with Remi080 more. This family has already shown its colors and they aren't going to change. You may have won this little battle, but do you really want many more battles in the years to come. I wouldn't. Get out now and keep loading up the truck.

...but I know you won't.

Agreed but the father is 74. Not much longer I think to go and the mother is 68.

[pigeonjake]

I think my next move is to get that eldest sister to really hate being in my home so she will do anything to leave on her own. Maybe then I can find happiness with my wife and 2 babies.

that is a quote from the OP,, IN REPLY 58,

so know its all yours?,

if i was them i wouldnt want to be there with you,,

talk about thais wanting everything for free,

my wife and I built our own home, not waited for her perents to pass away we stood on our own 2 feet and did what we wanted,,

look on you tube under thaifarmlife.com to see our place,and what we do, what we did for ourselfs,,

[Gecko123]

OP:

Edit:

Let me rephrase my question.

Do you have any reason to believe that your wife did not support the decision 100% to remodel the parent's house as opposed to building a separate new home for you, your wife and your children?

If the answer is "yes", I would say that would go a long way towards explaining the collective behavior of the extended family.

Edited May 12, 2015 by Gecko123

[milkycheese]

Edited May 12, 2015 by milkycheese

[Scully]

Even if the house is in your wife's name always expect it to be her parents until they pass. This will likely mean free run for all family and sometimes close friends, forget your privacy. Your wife being the youngest has been given the obligation to look after the parents and her sister who got the loan knows it. It sounds like the sister is taking the mick and hoping little sis and her farang hubby will come along and bail them out.

Having myself lived in a house with an ex and her parents, I have to say you really need to want to do it yourself, because your wife's decisions will be swayed by family.

If you have made up your mind and are doing it, then I sure hope you have plans for a little privacy. Being the youngest daughter of a poorer family is a crap deal and they've often been groomed to forget about themselves. If it was me I would run, but maybe its too late for you.

[ggt]

Do you still have a pair of gonads? If not, grow some quickly...

This situation will likely put you into an early grave...daily angst and sadness....good luck...

[fey]

Turn of events: Today I went to the house and started loading concrete, wood, doors, and all of out personal belongings into the truck.

Arguments insured with wife and her father and a different sister who lives behind the house and who also has done nothing to show bad and even likes our plan to remodel the family house.

By the time I had loaded my truck beyond capacity, father had a change of heart/thinking. Now I an told that I can do what I planned with the house minus the one room the eldest sister lives in. A 3x3 meter room.

I told the wife to explain that her room is still open to the dust and webs is still open to everything else. So they agreed to let me seal her room since this sister is a pig that is lazy to clean.

To me this seems like I was being tested by the father and everyone to see if I would bend to their wishes. If so, then, I have won.

Or, could it be that they have seen that I was serious to take my wife and kids far away from them forever because of their stubbornness?

Either way! They have succumbed to my plan. What problems lie for me in the future can only be imagined now.

I think my next move is to get that eldest sister to really hate being in my home so she will do anything to leave on her own. Maybe then I can find happiness with my wife and 2 babies.

Why don't you remodel after everyone leaves?

You said the sister and her husband were there temporarily while the build their own home. The parents want to will the house over while they are alive, that does not mean you have to live there.

How are you handling the truck loading and the remodel in general with severe pain and spinal injury?

Edited May 12, 2015 by fey

[mesquite]

Hi, first of all i would like to say that i feel sorry for you, and second, all this is excactly the same as what happend with me, i do live in thai 15 years non stop. I would like to write a long story here to help you give some advice, but i am alreaddy writing a book at the moment about my life in thai, gues this book will never have a end, but hey! Im here to help in give you some support.

what i did was wrong, I did stay inside the house, but all problems will just grow towards an explosion inside the family.

The best you can do, not even belive your wife, get a rental house and let them find there own trouble first. Never share with family in thai. And never buy something on a other name than yourself. Keep your money behind, tell everyone your pour. If you buy , rent, or build something / even invest something, get it on contract with pictures and or videos. Record agreements! Make pictures, foto copy ID, documentation of all you agree to. Keep it all very safe. I did get the advice from a thai lawyer, witch saves my life right now. I have been sucked dry, i have been scamed for millions, just becouse a good "wife" , and becouse i could not speak thai. Thank god i can speak it better than english now. thai will be thai, never change. Never close your eyes, and always follow your brains, becouse even the heart can fool you.

Wish you good luck, be strong man!

This should be mandatory reading for every foreign man who enters Thailand.

[fey]

Turn of events: Today I went to the house and started loading concrete, wood, doors, and all of out personal belongings into the truck.

Arguments insured with wife and her father and a different sister who lives behind the house and who also has done nothing to show bad and even likes our plan to remodel the family house.

By the time I had loaded my truck beyond capacity, father had a change of heart/thinking. Now I an told that I can do what I planned with the house minus the one room the eldest sister lives in. A 3x3 meter room.

I told the wife to explain that her room is still open to the dust and webs is still open to everything else. So they agreed to let me seal her room since this sister is a pig that is lazy to clean.

To me this seems like I was being tested by the father and everyone to see if I would bend to their wishes. If so, then, I have won.

Or, could it be that they have seen that I was serious to take my wife and kids far away from them forever because of their stubbornness?

Either way! They have succumbed to my plan. What problems lie for me in the future can only be imagined now.

I think my next move is to get that eldest sister to really hate being in my home so she will do anything to leave on her own. Maybe then I can find happiness with my wife and 2 babies.

You won...this time.

But you won what exactly? The right to spend your money fixing up the parents house that has a loan against it, for ungrateful parents and a pig of sister and her lazy husband. Good win.

You should have driven that loaded truck out the front gate and made them beg you to come back. Made the sister clear the lien before you spend one more baht on that house or the bank may own a nice house. You gave in far too quickly. You were in a position to dictate terms and you blew it.

I could not imagine waking up each morning wondering what stress I had to face that day. I feel for you because I know how horrible a situation like this must be. You sound like a good guy just trying to do the right thing. But you live in a nest of vipers and I just don't think anything good is going to come of this,

Wish you luck...but it's not to late to change your mind and roll on out.

Weak and spineless..And they know it.

No pun intended.

[wowfactor10]

Move out then get a divorce and find a asian maid nurse and rent some house in the civil world .

[louse1953]

I have been thinking the same. Yet to do this my wife gets emotionally hurt. We have paid for the construction and all equipment and new tile and ceiling and water tanks and everything. We lose all.

Cut your loses mate,or be miserable and sick for the rest of your life.Health trumps wealth every time.

[seajae]

I would be more concerned with how they used your wifes land as collateral for their loan, is it in her name or someone elses. If you stay your are showing you are not a man but someone to be walked on whenever they feel like it, they have screwed you and your wife big time and any appeasing needs to be done by them not you or your wife. Moving away is the best thing you can do and take everything you have paid for with you,cancel all the work and make them responsible for all the sh*t they are causing

[louse1953]

So your wifes sister got a loan secured on the land, you don't say otherwise so I'm going to presume that this land contains the house, is that correct ?

If this is correct I think this is the point where your wife lost her inheritance.

I heard of something very similar happening in the family of someone I know. The uncle got a secured loan by taking the old woman who controls the land to get a massive mortgage which the bank seemed to have no problem handing over even though she has severe dementia and zero income. She has no idea what she's done and the uncle has all the money. When she dies there will be nothing but debt left over.

That's why i have usufruct over all properties,i am the only person in the family who can be trusted.

[louse1953]

How was it possible for the sister to get a Loan on the land owned by your wife?

My wife is the youngest daughter and she is entitled to inherit the piece of land with which the house sits on and the family house.

Not without a will she wont.Do you know how hard it is to get a will drawn up,with competing siblings.That's when the real bun fight will begin.

[louse1953]

Turn of events: Today I went to the house and started loading concrete, wood, doors, and all of out personal belongings into the truck.

Arguments insured with wife and her father and a different sister who lives behind the house and who also has done nothing to show bad and even likes our plan to remodel the family house.

By the time I had loaded my truck beyond capacity, father had a change of heart/thinking. Now I an told that I can do what I planned with the house minus the one room the eldest sister lives in. A 3x3 meter room.

I told the wife to explain that her room is still open to the dust and webs is still open to everything else. So they agreed to let me seal her room since this sister is a pig that is lazy to clean.

To me this seems like I was being tested by the father and everyone to see if I would bend to their wishes. If so, then, I have won.

Or, could it be that they have seen that I was serious to take my wife and kids far away from them forever because of their stubbornness?

Either way! They have succumbed to my plan. What problems lie for me in the future can only be imagined now.

I think my next move is to get that eldest sister to really hate being in my home so she will do anything to leave on her own. Maybe then I can find happiness with my wife and 2 babies.

5555,you have won the 1st battle,you will certainly lose the war.

[lovelomsak]

I keep coming back to read this thread hoping OP will post saying he is walking away from this madness,but he keeps coming up with reasons to stay I cannot believe he soesnot undertsand what he has gotten himself into. Like louse1953 said he won a battle but will lose the war.. At first I suggested walk away now I say run.

[louse1953]

Hi, first of all i would like to say that i feel sorry for you, and second, all this is excactly the same as what happend with me, i do live in thai 15 years non stop. I would like to write a long story here to help you give some advice, but i am alreaddy writing a book at the moment about my life in thai, gues this book will never have a end, but hey! Im here to help in give you some support.

what i did was wrong, I did stay inside the house, but all problems will just grow towards an explosion inside the family.

The best you can do, not even belive your wife, get a rental house and let them find there own trouble first. Never share with family in thai. And never buy something on a other name than yourself. Keep your money behind, tell everyone your pour. If you buy , rent, or build something / even invest something, get it on contract with pictures and or videos. Record agreements! Make pictures, foto copy ID, documentation of all you agree to. Keep it all very safe. I did get the advice from a thai lawyer, witch saves my life right now. I have been sucked dry, i have been scamed for millions, just becouse a good "wife" , and becouse i could not speak thai. Thank god i can speak it better than english now. thai will be thai, never change. Never close your eyes, and always follow your brains, becouse even the heart can fool you.

Wish you good luck, be strong man!

OP, I could not agree with Remi080 more. This family has already shown its colors and they aren't going to change. You may have won this little battle, but do you really want many more battles in the years to come. I wouldn't. Get out now and keep loading up the truck.

...but I know you won't.

Agreed but the father is 74. Not much longer I think to go and the mother is 68.

So your waiting for them to croak and they want you to pay,then leave.You all deserve each other.

[OMGImInPattaya]

Why do you insist on getting involved in the lives of poor Thai peasants...it will bring nothing but heartache and resentment (on both sides). But I guess it's too late now since you thought it was a good thing to merry into this lifetime burden.

[neeray]

So the OP is waiting for the in laws to croak. What an attitude ! I wonder how he will feel at 74 if people around him are "waiting for him to croak".

As miserable as these in laws might be portrayed, I can't help but feel that this situation was handled poorly right from the get go. So much seems to have been poorly communicated or not communicated at all.

And those who suggest burn the house down. They just show their red neck, vindictive ways. Could those be the ones who foster negative, farang sentiment ?

This thread has been very amusing. But it seems to be getting tired.

[fey]

Hi, first of all i would like to say that i feel sorry for you, and second, all this is excactly the same as what happend with me, i do live in thai 15 years non stop. I would like to write a long story here to help you give some advice, but i am alreaddy writing a book at the moment about my life in thai, gues this book will never have a end, but hey! Im here to help in give you some support.

what i did was wrong, I did stay inside the house, but all problems will just grow towards an explosion inside the family.

The best you can do, not even belive your wife, get a rental house and let them find there own trouble first. Never share with family in thai. And never buy something on a other name than yourself. Keep your money behind, tell everyone your pour. If you buy , rent, or build something / even invest something, get it on contract with pictures and or videos. Record agreements! Make pictures, foto copy ID, documentation of all you agree to. Keep it all very safe. I did get the advice from a thai lawyer, witch saves my life right now. I have been sucked dry, i have been scamed for millions, just becouse a good "wife" , and becouse i could not speak thai. Thank god i can speak it better than english now. thai will be thai, never change. Never close your eyes, and always follow your brains, becouse even the heart can fool you.

Wish you good luck, be strong man!

OP, I could not agree with Remi080 more. This family has already shown its colors and they aren't going to change. You may have won this little battle, but do you really want many more battles in the years to come. I wouldn't. Get out now and keep loading up the truck.

...but I know you won't.

Agreed but the father is 74. Not much longer I think to go and the mother is 68.

So your waiting for them to croak and they want you to pay,then leave.You all deserve each other.

Not uncommon for grand parents to live until their 90's in isaan. Comes from eating all that healthy food.