Do You Forget How Good You Have It Here?

[Neeranam]

Having lived in Thailand for many years now, sometimes I forget how good it really is.

Do you find that after a few years you forget how good things are and start finding faults with everyday living in Thailand? Once the good becomes 'commonplace', it's not so good anymore.

I'm reflecting a bit on my life here after 5000 [negative(and some positive )] posts.

Certain aspects of Thai culture and foreigners living here really get my blood boiling – but on reflection, it’s really a weakness in myself – self-righteous anger and lack of acceptance, which are subtle and perverse forms of self-satisfaction, which allows me to remain comfortably unaware of my own defects, of which there are many .

N N

[farangsay]

Having spent so many years living in "foreign" countries that even my

native land now falls into that category I'm not qualified to answer.

But

I have found that the difference between gripers and non-gripers

shows itself instantly. The gripers start as soon as they arrive.

The ironic thing is that if you started as a non-griper and after

many years start to compare where you are with what you left

behind what you left behind has moved on and is not the same

any more.

[dog412]

Having lived in Thailand for many years now, sometimes I forget how good it really is.

Do you find that after a few years you forget how good things are and start finding faults with everyday living in Thailand? Once the good becomes 'commonplace', it's not so good anymore.

I'm reflecting a bit on my life here after 5000 [negative(and some positive )] posts.

Certain aspects of Thai culture and foreigners living here really get my blood boiling – but on reflection, it’s really a weakness in myself – self-righteous anger and lack of acceptance, which are subtle and perverse forms of self-satisfaction, which allows me to remain comfortably unaware of my own defects, of which there are many .

N N

i would advise you "meditate" on the "culture" that permitted you to be able have "critical" thought. acceptance is for ants. thought is the way.

[kayo]

Nee, you seem mostly aware of the skills in which you "lack" -for want of a better word - in order to be content living in LOS.

Acceptance certainly is a factor, but that is the case in all countries, in all cultures, with all peoples, with wives and hubbies, with children and parents, with all things, and even when dealing with a temeramental internet connections

At the end of the day, frustrations can be allowed to exist in any place. Where do you feel they are minimal/more manageable.

If that is Thailand, than perhaps you've made a good choice.

Like any relationship: Does the good outweigh the bad?

Is the bad tolerable, in order to keep hold of the good.

And above all, have you found yourself in a society where you have grown, expanded, as a person, more so than you would have done staying at "home".

As with Farangsay, "home" is more of a concept to me than a reality. I'm a "bloody foreigner" wherever I go. Some places treat me less bloody though.

edit: BTW, 5000 posts...

Edited October 21, 2006 by kayo

[Cyberstar]

Sorry, a bit late for deep contemplations, here ... and I admittedly am not quite sure what the topic of this thread is ... However, I sort of feel like contributing the best i can ...

First of all ... don't ever fall victim to the illusion that the number of posts made on TV, yield any indication of how well you understand "Expat life in Thailand".

Second ... Neeranam, I've seen many posts from your hand, that've added to my own understanding of "Expat life in Thailand". (I'm a newbee compared to you).

Third ... Reading your OP, I sort of felt inspired to hit the keyboard ... However, now re-reading the thread to figure what to write, I fail to figure what your OP is about, except for ridicuously boasting of your 5000 posts ...

[udon]

You need to spend about 12 months back in yr native country to start to really appreciate the good things about Thailand.

There are alot of negs about Thailand but it sure beats Sydney and the violence here.

I cannot walk home (safely) after sunset........ I never had this problem anywhere in Thailand.

I regard Thailand as "Home".

[farangsay]

Neeranam , is all your problem an identity crisis ?

We all have them , but I try to keep mine down to one a day.

If you exceed this you should seek help.

Recommend a brown bottle with an elephant on the label.

But not before nightfall.

KO you have changed into a philosopher!

Is it the mescal or the stuff in the ciggies ?

Tell me , it might work for me !

Also , KO , I have really tried to follow your post (follow = understand).

I have not totally succeeded (being an ungifted pillock trying to follow a

gifted pillock) but the following editting might help us mere morons better

understand your words.

Nee, you seem mostly aware of the skills in drop the word "in" which is superflous which you "lack" -comma is better for want of a better word - ditto in order to be content living in LOS.

Acceptance certainly is a factor, but that is the case in all countries, in all cultures, with all peoples, with wives and hubbies, with children and parents, with all things, and even when dealing with a temeramental temperamental internet connections a should be followed by the singuler noun not the plural

At the end of the day, frustrations can be allowed to exist in any place "can be allowed" is far too passive , how about dropping it. Then the sentence makes sense. . Where do you feel they are minimal/more manageable.

If that is Thailand, than perhaps you've made a good choice.

Like any relationship: Does the good outweigh the bad?

Is the bad tolerable, in order to keep hold of the good.

And above all, have you found yourself in a society where you have grown, expanded, as a person, more so than you would have done staying at "home".

As with Farangsay, "home" is more of a concept to me than a reality. I'm a "bloody foreigner" wherever I go. Some places treat me less bloody though.

edit: BTW, 5000 posts...

Hope this helps

After so many Changs it took me a while to get it right.

Yours a "bloody foreignor"

[Poverty Packer]

I enjoy it here. It's cheap, I mean dirt cheap and that's the main thing for me

[kayo]

Farangsay

and now, when words are just not sufficient,

Poverty Packer

[udon]

I enjoy it here. It's cheap, I mean dirt cheap and that's the main thing for me

So is Cambodia, Vietnam & Indonesia.

Why don't you live there if "cheap" is your main criteria?

[kmart]

You need to spend about 12 months back in yr native country to start to really appreciate the good things about Thailand.

There are alot of negs about Thailand but it sure beats Sydney and the violence here.

I cannot walk home (safely) after sunset........ I never had this problem anywhere in Thailand.

I regard Thailand as "Home".

Agreed. A bit of perspective gained by spending some time outside of Thailand is refreshing. The little niggles here can become overwhelming if you let them get too big. Go home for a visit with friends / family, and come back to new horizons.

[jackr]

You need to spend about 12 months back in yr native country to start to really appreciate the good things about Thailand.

There are alot of negs about Thailand but it sure beats Sydney and the violence here.

I cannot walk home (safely) after sunset........ I never had this problem anywhere in Thailand.

I regard Thailand as "Home".

Agreed. A bit of perspective gained by spending some time outside of Thailand is refreshing. The little niggles here can become overwhelming if you let them get too big. Go home for a visit with friends / family, and come back to new horizons.

I did and the niggles are still there; namely the visa situation (have visa) which is a f***king PIA in the great scheme of things. The weather's good.

[Gary A]

We have selective memories. I tend to remember all the good things about my home country and to forget the negative things. Living in paradise gets to be just normal and after a number of years is no longer anything special. To get over this way of thinking I recommend a minimum two week trip back home. I think a week is enough BUT an extra week will make you realize just how lucky we really are here in the Kingdom.

[sting01]

Well, after someyears in thailand, I can compare btw life here and life there (my own country) :

1) Beer is cold, often serve with ice. It's at least an abomination in my own country, on the ground iced beer will suppress the taste of houblon, and by drink a beer will simply be drink alcohol and not enjoythe full pleasure of it

2) life is cheap, it allow me to compete with indians or chineses. Staying in my own country I would have a life for a week with what I am earning here in one month.

3) internet is atbest not good, but usually is a poor thing (no bandwith, censored aleatory, sometimes working slow as a 33K). In my country .... well real DSL everywhere, and optical fiber next year (6 Gig both up and down).

4) The expats because they can get some life they did not deserve in their own country are thinking they are Hi So. The day a Pataya resident will be able to compare his lifestyle with a Cannes/Nice/Monaco resident (expat too), will be a day of sadness for many whoresmonger.

5) I do enjoy the factto live in a country with a long (sic) hystory because I a mborn from a very young country (only 1 500 years old).

6) I do also enjoy the true meaning of the word culture while being in thailand, as my country is a cultureless country (well I had to dig hard to find some name, such Voltaire , Rousseau, Moliere, Zola, Dumas, Depardieau, Sophie Marceau, Gainsbourg, Lulli, Rameau , Goddart, Sartre). Yes I am thankfull to be in country that is culturally advanced (Thailand is the contry of .... feel free to fill the blank, because I can not).

7) I am glad to live in a country where tolerance , justice, and equality is the moto. I do not feel like a cashcow, nor I do think it's unfair to give 51% of my company shares to somechai, nor find it'sabusive I had to support finacialy people (400 000 for support visa) ... Well, any legislation of that kind would be denied by the constitutional concil in my own country as racist, and opposite to the declaration of the citisen rights (you know the document that start by : every human being is born egal in right .......).

8) As white westerner, son of a country who had an empire last century, I think it's good I learn how you can feel when it's you the untermensch. For that also I am grateful to thailand, for the first time of my life I felt not like a shit (that is the feeling I had in my country) but less than a shit.

9) I am also grateful to have discover the true meaning of democracy, and also the famous rule of : I know best. Saddly in europe , political men tend to listen what the citisens said, and by so do not fufill their duty completly.

10) No need to say : when you are unhappy somewhere the best is to leave. I am jsut waiting the end of my rent (2 month) to go. So no need to pupsh me, or to invite me to do so, it's planned. It;'s an opinion forum, so I give mine. And I wonder if someone can counter argument what I said without using : YOU ARE A GUEST (I am not, because usually a guest do not pay), or THAI PEOPLE ARE ANGEL (sorry but I did not saw wings.

Last point, Liberty is not freedom, and freedom is not anarchy. Many of us expat are happy to be here because they can buy their own anarchy (they can drive drunk, because if the police arrest them they will simply pay). But in that case, if you are here only to buy, what kind of respect for the natives do you have (appart saying you are in love with the asian way to allow rich to buy legality)?

[udon]

It's the challenges of trying to explain what peanut oil is to a Tesco shop assistant.

It's the atmosphere I miss mainly, & I don't mean the humidity.

[Jai Dee]

To get over this way of thinking I recommend a minimum two week trip back home. I think a week is enough BUT an extra week will make you realize just how lucky we really are here in the Kingdom.

Isn't that the truth?

A fortnight back in your country of origin will be enough to make you realise that any and all problems you think you have in LOS pale into insignificance in comparison.

BTW, congrats on the 5K Neeranam.

Sting01... are you French?

[jdinasia]

You need to spend about 12 months back in yr native country to start to really appreciate the good things about Thailand.

There are alot of negs about Thailand but it sure beats Sydney and the violence here.

I cannot walk home (safely) after sunset........ I never had this problem anywhere in Thailand.

I regard Thailand as "Home".

They'll let you back 'home'soon

[fruittbatt]

Every time I go back to the former country (I don't call Australia "home" unlike John Paul Young), it seems more foreign.

Empty suburbs where the chief growth industry seems to be funeral homes; pristine freeways; blank faces; a government whose policies are total anathema to me; chain stores; mega malls; family politics: it seems so boring, material and meaningless.

Every time I come back to Thailand it's like all my senses are re-awakened: lots of noise, a plethora of different smells, smiles, too many sights to take in at a glance, friendly gestures and hands-on greeting, brilliant food.

After a while back in LOS I do miss our (adult) children, my sister, a few friends, clean empty beaches, excellent coffee, top bookshops, galleries, intellectual discussion, good movies, western fashion, quality medical care. These are reasons to go back to the west for visits. What I value more is the freedom I have in LOS to realise long-held personal goals.

In the West the cost of living forces people to work until they are 70+ years just to consume increasingly expensive goods and services. Is that a crazy way to live? I believe so. Even when there are minor annoyances here in LOS, I just think of the alternative: life in the West. This is an instant cure for any negative reactions to daily pressures.

I realised how much at "home" I feel and just how good life is here when the new visa regs were being discussed. The alternatives to Thailand seemed so dismal by comparison.

Edited October 22, 2006 by fruittbatt

[Little Black Duck]

Having lived in Thailand for many years now, sometimes I forget how good it really is.

Do you find that after a few years you forget how good things are and start finding faults with everyday living in Thailand? Once the good becomes 'commonplace', it's not so good anymore.

I'm reflecting a bit on my life here after 5000 [negative(and some positive )] posts.

Certain aspects of Thai culture and foreigners living here really get my blood boiling – but on reflection, it’s really a weakness in myself – self-righteous anger and lack of acceptance, which are subtle and perverse forms of self-satisfaction, which allows me to remain comfortably unaware of my own defects, of which there are many .

N N

I have lived here for over 13 years with a couple of extended trips back to OZ I know why I choose to live here..

People complain about the corruption, it happens back home only they try to keep it quiet..

Big brother is looking over your shoulder constantly..Difficulty in doing Simple thing like opening a bank acc.. or putting up a garden shed just two thing that spring to mind..Local Govt,State Govt and Federal Govt.. Radar Speed traps,DUI cant go out for a night out..And the cops wouldnt tollerate half the things you get away with here..

You are over 50 looking for a job forget it, here at 60 they say your not old, I'm 63 now have my own bus and not in any way restricted, look at the elect in this country would all be banned in OZ.

75% of Resteraunts wouldnt come up to health regs..You are by law in Perth not allowed to take home Doggy Bags,, and Whistling at a good looking woman is Sexual Harrasment..

Besides we dont have that rotten COLD WEATHER here ...

Maybe thats why I call Thailand Home..

[Heng]

It's all what you make of it. I spend a month or so 'back home' stateside and then the rest 'back home' here in the LOS. I don't gripe in either place because IMO I 'have it good' in both places.

[gabe]

Having lived in Thailand for many years now, sometimes I forget how good it really is.

Do you find that after a few years you forget how good things are and start finding faults with everyday living in Thailand? Once the good becomes 'commonplace', it's not so good anymore.

I'm reflecting a bit on my life here after 5000 [negative(and some positive )] posts.

Certain aspects of Thai culture and foreigners living here really get my blood boiling – but on reflection, it’s really a weakness in myself – self-righteous anger and lack of acceptance, which are subtle and perverse forms of self-satisfaction, which allows me to remain comfortably unaware of my own defects, of which there are many .

N N

Thailand does have its own faults, but i know that my life here in Thailand right now is better than my life in the U.S.A.

[Noel]

Well, after someyears in thailand, I can compare btw life here and life there (my own country) :

4) The expats because they can get some life they did not deserve in their own country are thinking they are Hi So. The day a Pataya resident will be able to compare his lifestyle with a Cannes/Nice/Monaco resident (expat too), will be a day of sadness for many whoresmonger.

9) I am also grateful to have discover the true meaning of democracy, and also the famous rule of : I know best. Saddly in europe , political men tend to listen what the citisens said, and by so do not fufill their duty completly.

Priceless...!

[udon]

and very French.

[meemiathai]

Having lived in Thailand for many years now, sometimes I forget how good it really is.

Do you find that after a few years you forget how good things are and start finding faults with everyday living in Thailand? Once the good becomes 'commonplace', it's not so good anymore.

I'm reflecting a bit on my life here after 5000 [negative(and some positive )] posts.

Certain aspects of Thai culture and foreigners living here really get my blood boiling – but on reflection, it’s really a weakness in myself – self-righteous anger and lack of acceptance, which are subtle and perverse forms of self-satisfaction, which allows me to remain comfortably unaware of my own defects, of which there are many .

N N

Glad you have this realization. You are on your way to success.

[samtam]

Neeranam - great post. I was just thinking the same myself, (about myself). Nowhere is perfect, and you have to take things on balance. On balance for me, I'd much rather be here than anywhere else right now. If that wasn't the case, I'd be a bit daft remaining here. The irritations of living in Thailand are the irritations of life. They might be different in form in other countries, but they would be there, and as you have judged, that's more to do with one's own personality than anything else. However, by the same token, if you realise how lucky you are, (as I do), that would probably apply anywhere too; it's a state of mind. I think it's OK to point out the obvious faults, but maybe it's only self-indulgence, because there isn't very much you can do about changing things here, (or indeed in many places). Importantly however, if you can do something to change a process for the better, (like suggesting a constructive remedy, to the people who can change the process), then I think that's much more productive than whingeing. I admit to having whinged about my experiences at the new airport. There is nothing that I can do to make it better, so it's a self-indulgent pastime. I wish I could influence those who can change things, but that's unrealistic. But whingeing on that subject does perhaps make one feel better. It doesn't solve the problem.

[MiG16]

5) I do enjoy the factto live in a country with a long (sic) hystory because I a mborn from a very young country (only 1 500 years old).

--- hmmm would that qualify as racist remark I wonder...what does your constitution say? it allows you to make general defamatory remark like that about another sovereign country? perhaps we need to consult it.

7) I am glad to live in a country where tolerance , justice, and equality is the moto. I do not feel like a cashcow, nor I do think it's unfair to give 51% of my company shares to somechai, nor find it'sabusive I had to support finacialy people (400 000 for support visa) ... Well, any legislation of that kind would be denied by the constitutional concil in my own country as racist, and opposite to the declaration of the citisen rights (you know the document that start by : every human being is born egal in right .......).

--- I believe they recently increased the visa fee for TOURIST VISA to the schengen states...that includes about 15 european countries. have no idea what the regulations and fee would be when it comes to living there long term...but my guess is WOULD be MORE DIFFICULT than simply the short term tourist visa too.

9) I am also grateful to have discover the true meaning of democracy, and also the famous rule of : I know best. Saddly in europe , political men tend to listen what the citisens said, and by so do not fufill their duty completly.

---- the kind of democracy where minorities are still treated as at best 'migrants'? after having been born there?

10) No need to say : when you are unhappy somewhere the best is to leave. I am jsut waiting the end of my rent (2 month) to go. So no need to pupsh me, or to invite me to do so, it's planned. It;'s an opinion forum, so I give mine. And I wonder if someone can counter argument what I said without using : YOU ARE A GUEST (I am not, because usually a guest do not pay), or THAI PEOPLE ARE ANGEL (sorry but I did not saw wings.

---- notice that you say people. people = human beings, human beings are no angels. but what that means is there are good, there are bad, there are worse. regardless of whether thai, american, english, aussie, french or german, or any other.

in any case, have a safe flight

Last point, Liberty is not freedom, and freedom is not anarchy.

without being an expert.....I can however say this..liberty IS freedom. It is the freedom to choose. what each one chooses is up to them.

have a nice day

[GuestHouse]

The lives we live(d) outside of Thailand is the only reference any of us have to judge our live's in Thailand.

Much of what is said by people about Thailand in comparrison with their former life outside of Thailand reveals the truth of this.

[GuestHouse]

MiG16

Sting01 also said.

Many of us expat are happy to be here because they can buy their own anarchy

Would you like to comment on that?

[sting01]

To get over this way of thinking I recommend a minimum two week trip back home. I think a week is enough BUT an extra week will make you realize just how lucky we really are here in the Kingdom.

Isn't that the truth?

A fortnight back in your country of origin will be enough to make you realise that any and all problems you think you have in LOS pale into insignificance in comparison.

BTW, congrats on the 5K Neeranam.

Sting01... are you French?

eventually, in more to be pissed off, bitter and nut, I am also french. But it's not related, I do know some french people who positively love Thailand and who positively hate Voltaire, Racine .....

Allow me to re formulate : Thailand is the second best third worl country where I lived during the last 25 years. The number was Ivory coast. But , as Ivory Coast , it's still a developping country, assuming you weight a country not with only a city, or some Hi So citisen of this country, but in it's whole (64 millions of people in Thailand, with the average earming of ....)

[Noel]

To get over this way of thinking I recommend a minimum two week trip back home. I think a week is enough BUT an extra week will make you realize just how lucky we really are here in the Kingdom.

Isn't that the truth?

A fortnight back in your country of origin will be enough to make you realise that any and all problems you think you have in LOS pale into insignificance in comparison.

BTW, congrats on the 5K Neeranam.

Sting01... are you French?

eventually, in more to be pissed off, bitter and nut, I am also french. But it's not related, I do know some french people who positively love Thailand and who positively hate Voltaire, Racine .....

Allow me to re formulate : Thailand is the second best third worl country where I lived during the last 25 years. The number was Ivory coast. But , as Ivory Coast , it's still a developping country, assuming you weight a country not with only a city, or some Hi So citisen of this country, but in it's whole (64 millions of people in Thailand, with the average earming of ....)

Hmmm, that 'Hi So' reference again.

'Sting01' appears to be a very well-balanced individual, with a French Fry on both shoulders...