Thinking hard about moving back to the US

[Strange]

Am I the only one?

 

I have a good job in Oil & Gas that allows me to live anywhere I want. Im 32 and been in Thailand for 8 years but I'm offshore 6+ Months a year. In the beginning it was an easy choice to move here because my employers tend to be out of Singapore. Flying 30ish hours one way every hitch was a huge pain in the ass. The other reason is the US Income Tax Exemption for staying out of the USA for the whole year. 

 

All my banking and credit cards are still in the USA and my credit score is "Excellent"

 

The slump in oil prices has me in Thailand nonstop for 9 months and I've been doing a lot of thinking about my situation. 

 

Ive pretty much come to the conclusion that Thailand is boring as hell and expensive if you want nice things. And by nice things I mean a good clean apartment with central air, carpet, full kitchen with a damn oven, lighting quick internet, gym & pool facilities etc. Literally all these things I can in an apartment complex in Tampa for about $1000 a month. With my credit score and the amount of time I will be in the states in a year I can lease a damn Mercedes Benz for a reasonable price. 

 

Yes, its true, thailand can be cheap if you want to live cheap but the novelty has worn off for me. 

 

My wife argues about the income tax id have to pay as a "waste" or a "rip off" and I've tried to explain that the tax that I pay contributes to the US as a whole. I can get in the car, hit cruse control, turn the music up and before I know it I've driven an hour. If I call 911 someone will answer and OMG actually show up. If I go to the hospital I guarantee you I will be taken care of regardless of my credit card or cash "guarantee". If the cops show up and a law is broken SOMEONE is going to jail and there aint no bribing a US cop.

 

Once you want more than a crummy "room" and scooter the prices skyrocket and everyday I'm having a hard time justifying it. 

 

I know a lot of the thai-er than thai expats on here have their blinders on, but is anyone else getting tired of life here? Its getting harder and harder for me to look past all the BS. 

 

[JHolmesJr]

I think you have talked yourself into it. Bon voyage.

Edited September 12, 2016 by JHolmesJr

[richard_smith237]

All of your points are valid... 

And once you have a family they become more valid... 

 

I'm in a very similar situation and for me the decision is offset with UK Tax. 

Over the past years the Tax that I would have had to pay by far offsets the additional cost of living here and enjoying the 'nice things'.

 

As young as you are moving back is not a hardship, and neither would moving back out here be should you make that decision.

 

About 10 years ago I moved back to the UK and worked there for 2 years in the same industry (same job). In the end I preferred living in Bangkok. 

 

Now that I have a Son there is always an attraction to moving back home purely for my sons education...  but, I consider a couple of the International Schools such as Pattana & Harrow to superior to the UK Schools he'd attend, thus for now I have evaluated that his opportunities are better served here... My Wife is Thai and is probably happier here too... Me, I'm happy anywhere to be honest...  Life is what you make of it. 

 

 

 

 

Edited September 12, 2016 by richard_smith237

[Strange]

21 minutes ago, richard_smith237 said:

All of your points are valid... 

And once you have a family they become more valid... 

 

I'm in a very similar situation and for me the decision is offset with UK Tax. 

Over the past years the Tax that I would have had to pay by far offsets the additional cost of living here and enjoying the 'nice things'.

 

As young as you are moving back is not a hardship, and neither would moving back out here be should you make that decision.

 

About 10 years ago I moved back to the UK and worked there for 2 years in the same industry (same job). In the end I preferred living in Bangkok. 

 

Now that I have a Son there is always an attraction to moving back home purely for my sons education...  but, I consider a couple of the International Schools such as Pattana & Harrow to superior to the UK Schools he'd attend, thus for now I have evaluated that his opportunities are better served here... My Wife is Thai and is probably happier here too... Me, I'm happy anywhere to be honest...  Life is what you make of it. 

 

Thats another thing, wife wants to have kids & believes that in the next 2 days she will instantly become infertile. We are the same age. 

 

I want a family as well, but we are out here by Surin and ill be damned if I have kids and raise them out here. The kids out here are either brainwashed parrots or sociopaths lol. 

 

The only option is Bangkok and the international schools and then you have Bangkok expenses. 

 

I agree with what you are saying about UK tax. I believe you guys pay more then we do but you get more days per year in the UK before you are taxed in full. I may be wrong but its 180 days and in the US its like 35 days. Im to the point now where even paying US tax is good because while the tax is a big decider, the benefits of living in a first world country are worth it. Plus literally every consumer item in the states including cars is cheaper.

 

Add to that I can finance & mortgage. My property in the states is mortgaged at 3.25% fixed for 30 years. Here its cash only unless the wife has collateral or a government job. Besides, smart money is using other peoples money. Finance what you can afford for a reasonable amount and keep your cash invested. 

 

Also, jobs. The wife can get an actual paying job. Out here its not even worth it for the 15-20k baht she would make. Thats <deleted> $500 a month and she would be working all the time. Worst case in the states she could work at starbucks for 16 hrs a week just for the benefits & retirement funds and I could contribute to it. 

[guzzi850m2]

Well your decision off-course and everybody's situation is different.

 

So how will your wife get along if you are gone 6 month per year? Okay you are young and can perhaps get a land based job?

 

I am also off-shore 6 month per year and moving my wife & son back to Denmark while I am off-shore is far from perfect. I don't have much contact with my family in Denmark so not much help to get from them.

 

My wife don't really want to move out of Thailand and my 6 year old son attend a fairly good private school here in Pattaya.

 

You guys from the US have the advantage that you can choose to live where it is warm, not an option for me if moving to Denmark and our native language is Danish not English, which basically is of no use outside DK.

 

We will likely move back for a year at some stage to secure my boy a Danish citizenship/passport beyond his 18th year birthday but that is only in the early planning stage at this point.

 

Denmark is expensive, very expensive, cars/bikes cost app X2 compared to made in Thailand vehicles but okay health care is free but a far cry from the nice private hospitals I gotten used to here. Tax in DK is horrible to say the least, little communist bastards. All the Middle East refuges cost a lot of money and are splitting the society up and causing a lot of problems.   

Living in a nice house here and often eating at restaurants, both Thai and Western food is very nice and convenient for us. My wife often goes out and buys Thai food and bring home and we eat out at the patio, 3-4 dishes for 300-400 baht for the 3 of us. 

 

Hmm, I rather not move back I think, ha-ha.

 

 

[moe666]

Do not kid yoursel the US is expensive, I am visiting at present ready to go back to Chiang Mai. Yes, you can move but in six months you will be pissing and moaning about the US. Thailand isn't perfect but frommy experience better than the US

[autanic]

I have had enough too of Thailand. I split my time between the UK and Thailand which amounts to around 6 months UK and 6 month Thailand.

I rent an apartment, which is super cheap and by the beach.

 

Members of this board have a phrase they call "Thai Bashing".  I am one of the main offenders because I have the audacity to complain about the "Crackdown" on Foreigners instead of taking up the jack-sea.

 

Let me make myself absolutely clear so there cannot be any misunderstandings. I love the Thai People. The over-whelming majority of them are decent and really nice, friendly people. Great People.

 

I cannot fault Country either, good weather most of the year and when it does rain, its because it is desperately needed.

 

No on to what really gets my goat.  The media will report a story, where 33 people are arrested for drug offences. Three of them will be falangs and they will have their pictures all over the paper, in handcuffs. The others will be Thais who are anonymously going about their business.

 

Laws passed, where falangs must carry around a sim card so the authorities know exactly where they are, who they are talking to and what their web browsing habits might be.

 

90 days reporting to the Police or Immigration, where you are made to feel like a bum, freeloader for having the gaul of staying in Thailand.  What will you be doing here ?  Nothing, just relaxing.  I encountered a month ago.

 

It is a build up of my animosity which is not good for me.  I feel resentment everywhere I go. I feel like an outsider, a freak.

 

That is why I have made the decision not to return to Thailand for the foreseeable future, as I am currently in the UK. 

 

At the end of the day, I am fortunate to be in the position, where I do not burn bridges and should I decide to return to LOS, I can, no problem.

 

My frame of mind at the moment, is what I am going back to Thailand for ???

 

There are many other Countries in South and South East Asia, which I would like to spend some of life, I am kite blowing in the wind, lets see which one wants foreigners to spend money,  rather than putting off foreigners.

[autanic]

1 minute ago, moe666 said:

Do not kid yoursel the US is expensive, I am visiting at present ready to go back to Chiang Mai. Yes, you can move but in six months you will be pissing and moaning about the US. Thailand isn't perfect but frommy experience better than the US

 

 

Thailand is not so cheap anymore friend. You also have the problem that the Government of Thailand does not want you in Thailand. Which means their media will brainwash the population in to not wanting you there soon too.  Who wants to live like that, not me.

[Ulysses G.]

3 hours ago, autanic said:

 

 

Thailand is not so cheap anymore friend.

 

Visit California and tell me that. I miss being able to eat Thai food 3 times a day for a pittance and living in a clean comfortable room for a few hundred dollars. There is nothing like that here. You people don't know how good you have it.

[returnofthailand]

mouhaha cops won't come. the average time for American cops to come is 45 minutes in detroit.
in Mexico it s 5 minutes.

get a clue man. better to relinquish your nationality before you end in a federal jail.

Hilary for prison.!

[tonray]

OK...see ya. Have a nice trip back. Thanks for letting us know your plans. And please delete you account..nothing worse than an ex expat posting here about life.

[Gecko123]

Let's take the OP out of the picture for a moment and just focus on the economic prospects for his wife.

 

The OP mentioned Starbucks. I have heard their benefits are generous, but it looks like the average wage for a barrister is only around $9.18/hour. Based on a 35 hour work week, that works out to $1392/month. If you compare that wage level and Tampa's cost of living (apartment, food, utilities, transportation, health care, medical/dental insurance, child care, clothing, etc.) to Surin's cost-of-living, I suspect that the 10,000-15,000 baht per month she could earn in Thailand starts to sound far more attractive than the OP (or his wife) might presently think. Comparing her earning potential and cost of living in the US to her earning potential and cost of living in Surin, I would argue that in all likelihood her standard of living might actually drop by moving to the US. 

 

Also, how is she going to be able to work - even part-time  - if she is planning to start having kids?  How much does child day care in Tampa cost? As an earlier poster pointed out, what is your wife going to do while you're out on an off-shore oil rig for months at a time? Sit at home and watch the kids? At least in Surin she has family and friends who can watch the kids for a spell and give her social support.

Edited September 12, 2016 by Gecko123

[bwpage3]

8 hours ago, richard_smith237 said:

All of your points are valid... 

And once you have a family they become more valid... 

 

I'm in a very similar situation and for me the decision is offset with UK Tax. 

Over the past years the Tax that I would have had to pay by far offsets the additional cost of living here and enjoying the 'nice things'.

 

As young as you are moving back is not a hardship, and neither would moving back out here be should you make that decision.

 

About 10 years ago I moved back to the UK and worked there for 2 years in the same industry (same job). In the end I preferred living in Bangkok. 

 

Now that I have a Son there is always an attraction to moving back home purely for my sons education...  but, I consider a couple of the International Schools such as Pattana & Harrow to superior to the UK Schools he'd attend, thus for now I have evaluated that his opportunities are better served here... My Wife is Thai and is probably happier here too... Me, I'm happy anywhere to be honest...  Life is what you make of it. 

 

 

 

 

My son went to one of those 500,000 baht a year schools and when he got the USA, he was a grade behind in every subject. No matter the price, there is NO school in Thailand that will prepare your kid for a western education. I for one am extremely happy we moved back to the USA and my son is getting a world class education. My friends wife (age 38) has a law degree from Thammasart Uni and cannot even pass the USA written drivers test. That should tell you something right there. 

[bwpage3]

58 minutes ago, returnofthailand said:

mouhaha cops won't come. the average time for American cops to come is 45 minutes in detroit.
in Mexico it s 5 minutes.

get a clue man. better to relinquish your nationality before you end in a federal jail.

Hilary for prison.!

Whats the average time for a Thai cop to come when a farang is on the line?

[Ulysses G.]

1 minute ago, bwpage3 said:

Clean comfortable room versus a large house with a pool at the beach? Being confined to 1 room is not living, it is prison. 

 

I have done both and I like having the option of how much to spend. Financially,  I have been up and I have been down. In California, I do not have much option. It is very expensive for not much at all.

 

Try a few days in prison sometime and a clean, comfortable room will not seem so bad. 

[Gecko123]

13 minutes ago, bwpage3 said:

Thai food 3 times a day is for paupers. 

 

So anyone who eats Thai food 3 times a day is a pauper? Nice respect shown for your wife's culture, BW.

[1FinickyOne]

No, I am not personally tired of it here, but that is me... my situation is not yours. 

 

It appears you are quite angry and not enjoying it here. I do not think that will get better but just increase... you seem capable of making sound arguments to go back to USA... so, give it a shot. Just be a bit wary of credit. Those bills eventually do need to be paid.

 

Good luck to you. 

[georgemandm]

1 hour ago, Ulysses G. said:

 

Visit California and tell me that. I miss being able to eat Thai food 3 times a day for a pittance and living in a clean comfortable room for a few hundred dollars. There is nothing like that here. You people don't know how good you have it.

I agree with you to a  Point , thailand is very cheap to go out to   Restaurants And eat and hotels are cheap.

but the life here is not for me , it is not like back home were I am free in thailand as a western I am not free I have to report like I am a  criminal .

if you come from the west and have your own home and good income you live very well .

but eating out in restaurants is expensive and I not eat out a lot back home .

i can go on and on but some people like thailand and some people like it back home .

[Scotwight]

5 hours ago, autanic said:

 

Laws passed, where falangs must carry around a sim card so the authorities know exactly where they are, who they are talking to and what their web browsing habits might be.

 

90 days reporting to the Police or Immigration, where you are made to feel like a bum, freeloader for having the gaul of staying in Thailand.  What will you be doing here ?  Nothing, just relaxing.  I encountered a month ago.

Not true and you can do your 90 day report by mail or INTERNET.  

[Scotwight]

30 minutes ago, bwpage3 said:

Whats the average time for a Thai cop to come when a farang is on the line?

Cop lives next door.  I just yell out the window "hey Bun" Bun is his name.  

[Ulysses G.]

2 minutes ago, georgemandm said:

 

i can go on and on but some people like thailand and some people like it back home .

 

We can agree on that. You should do what makes you happy.

[Scotwight]

25 minutes ago, bwpage3 said:

Clean comfortable room versus a large house with a pool at the beach? Being confined to 1 room is not living, it is prison. Thai food 3 times a day is for paupers. If you cannot make money and can only shackle yourself into 1 room in Thailand you failed somewhere along the road in life. If people could get a decent looking, fit woman and had the money to spend to have a real life in their own country, they probably would have stayed there. I can tell you the girls in Florida put any Thai girl to shame. Or course if you are a fat old ugly prune and have to pay for someone that cannot even speak you language, then you might have a point.  With North Korea coming unhinged with the missiles, Thailand might not be the best place when NK hits the red button! 

Life is what it is and Thai go go girls as opposed to Florida go go girls are no contest.  Florida my pension lasts 1 hour Thailand it lasts all year if you get my meaning.  I think Thailand is far safer than USA as far as NK goes - ask someone who lives in Asia for details.  Why would a young guy come to Thailand?  I don't have a clue.  Money and girls and that first big divorce experience is better in the West.  Wait till you been through the washer a few times to really appreciate Thailand.  

[impulse]

2 hours ago, Ulysses G. said:

 

Visit California and tell me that. I miss being able to eat Thai food 3 times a day for a pittance and living in a clean comfortable room for a few hundred dollars. There is nothing like that here. You people don't know how good you have it.

 

Why choose the most expensive place in the whole USA to compare to?

[catman20]

your dead right , sounds right move for you.

[Ulysses G.]

13 minutes ago, impulse said:

 

Why choose the most expensive place in the whole USA to compare to?

 

Because that is where I live and I would not live anywhere else. It is beautiful and the weather is amazing, but you pay for it.

[NanLaew]

2 hours ago, Ulysses G. said:

 

Visit California and tell me that. I miss being able to eat Thai food 3 times a day for a pittance and living in a clean comfortable room for a few hundred dollars. There is nothing like that here. You people don't know how good you have it.

Exactly. The OP is 32 years old, married and in the middle of his prime working/earning life and not a retiree who can get by on 3 bowls of noodles a day.

 

Since the oil patch won't be bouncing back to its $1000+/day former self anytime in the next 3-5 years, the OP's choice to relocate back to his homeland where he can get a paying job and work for the future is thoroughly sound. I had a buddy, similar age, married with a couple of kids who hung out in Pattaya for about 16 months, waiting for another shot in the oil patch where he had been busy for the previous 10 years before being laid off. The penny dropped that given the above comment about low median wages when the oil business does pick up, he had just irrecoverably lost a chunk of prime earning time. He went back to his home state and got a job within a couple of weeks. He plans on visiting his wife and kids every six months or so. His chances of eventually getting an oil patch job in the US as a US citizen with his previous experience is much higher than if he chose to live the faux economical life on the beach or Ban Nork in Thailand.

 

I also know of another former oil patch man who turned down paid work as the oil prices slumped and the day rates collapsed. His old mantra of, "I don't get out of bed for less than US$1k/day" resulted in him being unemployed for over 10 months now. Apparently he has become depressed, less sociable and his marriage is stressed.

Edited September 13, 2016 by NanLaew

[tonray]

10 hours ago, bwpage3 said:

My son went to one of those 500,000 baht a year schools and when he got the USA, he was a grade behind in every subject. No matter the price, there is NO school in Thailand that will prepare your kid for a western education. I for one am extremely happy we moved back to the USA and my son is getting a world class education. My friends wife (age 38) has a law degree from Thammasart Uni and cannot even pass the USA written drivers test. That should tell you something right there. 

I am pretty sure most Harvard graduates would not be able to pass the Thai written driver's test either.

Edited September 13, 2016 by metisdead
Please do not modify someone else's post in your quoted reply, either with font or color changes or wording.

[does]

a good clean apartment with central air, carpet, full kitchen with a damn oven, lighting quick internet, gym & pool facilities etc.

 

Why do I not have an ounce of sympathy...

[yellowboat]

Why stay in Thailand if you nine months to yourself.  I believe there are other countries and opportunities just outside of Thailand.  Why not start a business with the gobs of time on your hands.  If you were to go back to the best fed, most poorly read country in the world, furthering you or your wife's education would be your best bet.  Everybody wants to see oil fail.  Electric powered and bio driven vehicles are the future.   You are only 32 years old and have lots of time.  Go back to school.

Edited September 13, 2016 by yellowboat

[Mousehound]

1 hour ago, bwpage3 said:

Clean comfortable room versus a large house with a pool at the beach? Being confined to 1 room is not living, it is prison. Thai food 3 times a day is for paupers. If you cannot make money and can only shackle yourself into 1 room in Thailand you failed somewhere along the road in life. If people could get a decent looking, fit woman and had the money to spend to have a real life in their own country, they probably would have stayed there. I can tell you the girls in Florida put any Thai girl to shame. Or course if you are a fat old ugly prune and have to pay for someone that cannot even speak you language, then you might have a point.  With North Korea coming unhinged with the missiles, Thailand might not be the best place when NK hits the red button! 

I think that the missiles will be aimed at the USA not Thailand.  But to the OP.  If you have a good job I would agree the value in the States has to be better.  if you are not insisting on living in the top areas then I would have thought it was pretty cheap there.  Clothing, cars, gas and food seem incredibly cheap to me.