What Advice Would You Give a Thai Girl?

[jacko45k]

How does it qualify as a serious relaationship if she specifies it must be a falang? Sounds more like an arrangement.

I was asked something similar when visiting the wife's village by the old gals sitting around in the dirt, I suggested, teeth, a good wash and makeup.

Edited September 22, 2016 by jacko45k

[transam]

One thing l have learned is that Ladies here are not to bothered about a farangs looks or stature, some sort of financial security is far more important. But, giving advice really is a no-no, she must try and 'read' any guy she is interested in, unfortunately they all think farangs are millionaires, they all do, and so if by chance she is approached by a farang it will be hard to resist.

In all my years here I have never seen a bird reject a farang, what ever he looks like.

 

I know a lady near me that teamed up with a farang cos had dosh and she had baggage, the bloke turned out to be a nutter, crackers, she hates the sight of him but stays because of her baggage..

Soooo, I would never give advice except perhaps to take her time, don't rush things, the honey moon period may not last long.

[AgMech Cowboy]

20 hours ago, JJGreen said:

Avoid those with Thaivisa accounts

 

Might be the first time I've agreed with you, 100%.

[AgMech Cowboy]

Tell her 'Good Luck'.

[williamgeorgeallen]

if she is specifically looking for a foreigner then she is after money so. first look for one that is old or even better old and ugly. remember it is important that she dont care for good looks just for a good heart. they will need to have some money of course, better not forget that. no good trying to get blood from a stone. sitting in a bar is not so effective any more. better going online with dating sites. you need to have some photos of yourself doing a respectable job so go get some photos of yourself at your kids school and say you are a teacher. if you have a thai boyfriend or husband you need to introduce them as your brother or even your father if they are older. there is no need to hide the relationship as most westerners are too lazy to learn to speak or read thai. now as things progress you will need to come up with more and more elaborate ways to ask for money, as you gain your western boyfriends trust you can ask for larger amounts. when he says he wants to buy a condo tell him he can build a house on your land so he does not have to pay for the land. of course insist on marriage and no matter how old the girl is or how many kids she has she must say her parents are demanding a non refundable sinsot, at least 1 million should do it. hope this helps.

[Tony125]

Learn English , not just to be able to communicate with Americans, Canadians , Brits , Aussies and Kiwi's but many Europeans, Russians  and even Chinese speak some English.

[JJGreen]

 

Might be the first time I've agreed with you, 100%.

Never too late to see the light

[Gracas]

Run Noi Run.....And don't look back.

[drummer boy]

Hi! first of all how old are you and are you a bar girl this makes a different to a relationship if you like someone and he likes you take it slow and dont jump into bed fist date if you do this and he still wants you you have the right one whever you take my advice this is up to you as they say in thailand HaHa!

[eldragon]

33 minutes ago, williamgeorgeallen said:

if she is specifically looking for a foreigner then she is after money so. first look for one that is old or even better old and ugly. remember it is important that she dont care for good looks just for a good heart. they will need to have some money of course, better not forget that. no good trying to get blood from a stone. sitting in a bar is not so effective any more. better going online with dating sites. you need to have some photos of yourself doing a respectable job so go get some photos of yourself at your kids school and say you are a teacher. if you have a thai boyfriend or husband you need to introduce them as your brother or even your father if they are older. there is no need to hide the relationship as most westerners are too lazy to learn to speak or read thai. now as things progress you will need to come up with more and more elaborate ways to ask for money, as you gain your western boyfriends trust you can ask for larger amounts. when he says he wants to buy a condo tell him he can build a house on your land so he does not have to pay for the land. of course insist on marriage and no matter how old the girl is or how many kids she has she must say her parents are demanding a non refundable sinsot, at least 1 million should do it. hope this helps.

 

They're not all after money, at least not consciously. Many of em seem to prefer the way foreigners treat them. Or they appreciate the variety we bring to their life. But whether they're interested in money or not, I would advise a Thai girl to take an interest in her man. Care about his life and his feelings. Try to comprehend his thoughts and think about the way his culture is different. For no matter what their intentions are, the relationship will last longer if they're able to... understand their man.

[Borzandy]

What advice would you give a Thai girl who was looking for a serious relationship with a western foreigner?

The best advice is to give my phone number: xxxxxxxx

[Somebodee]

She should watch this video: 

 

[timber]

There is less than a 15% chance it will be a happy relationship.  Live for a year with each other to see if you can handle the differences.  Is he secure?  Be prepared for a split.  If you find yourself complaining too much split.  Love or infatuation?  Babies normally come from infatuation.  Can you be friends?  A lot of things, which people normally don't look into.  I don't know the guy, so can't comment specifically.  You won't really know the guy for a couple of months. Can you handle having a kid without a husband?

[williamgeorgeallen]

5 minutes ago, eldragon said:

 

They're not all after money, at least not consciously. Many of em seem to prefer the way foreigners treat them. Or they appreciate the variety we bring to their life. But whether they're interested in money or not, I would advise a Thai girl to take an interest in her man. Care about his life and his feelings. Try to comprehend his thoughts and think about the way his culture is different. For no matter what their intentions are, the relationship will last longer if they're able to... understand their man.

any thai girl that has decided to go specifically after a westerner is going after some form of payment or better lifestyle. in my 10 years here i dont know of any western/thai couples who last more than 10 years, unless they stay together for their kids. it does not make sense to look for a relationship with someone you have nothing in common with. woman are from venus and men are from mars. thai woman are from a separate different solar system from what i can see.

[YeahSiam]

Tell her to go to places like Bangkok Beat, Checkinn99, Strikers or any of the Hillary bars.

[YeahSiam]

1 hour ago, transam said:

One thing l have learned is that Ladies here are not to bothered about a farangs looks or stature, some sort of financial security is far more important.

 

You haven't learned much then, have you? Except, maybe, how to perpetuate a farang myth

[elgordo38]

Its kind of a gut instinct thing with me. Has been all my life. Please do not ask "How has that worked for you?" My g/f of 5 years now is much younger than me. She told me flat out she is looking for a foreigner not a Thai. All her sisters have foreign boyfriends or husbands they will not touch a Thai guy with a ten foot pole. Enough said. Older foreign men who have endured love over the years come into a mixed relationship here with more of a business attitude but only after they have been through the wringer a few times. The small head thinks less and the big head more a complete reversal. After being through the wringer twice I approached it with a business attitude. A lot will disagree but it worked for me. We hammered out a deal that we both live by faithfully. She can foresee that after I am gone she will be in a fairly good financial situation. So the long and the short of it is that it works but then she is an exceptionally honest person a rarity so to speak. I guess you could say we both won the lottery. 

[transam]

9 minutes ago, YeahSiam said:

 

You haven't learned much then, have you? Except, maybe, how to perpetuate a farang myth

Sorry, explain...

[scubascuba3]

 

You haven't learned much then, have you? Except, maybe, how to perpetuate a farang myth

Myth? I think most people know its true, hence why girlfriends and wives are often paid a salary.

[elgordo38]

1 minute ago, scubascuba3 said:

Myth? I think most people know its true, hence why girlfriends and wives are often paid a salary.

A salary is much better than parting with a pound of flesh in the west. 

[The manic]

Get pregnant.

[YeahSiam]

1 minute ago, transam said:

Sorry, explain...

 

It's a myth that Thai women don't care about a farang's looks.

They do care but they're just more willing to ignore those concerns if they think there's a payoff.

Why do you think so many of these women with less-than-attractive farangs almost always have a 'brother' in the background?

BTW, I've seen hundreds of farang men knocked back by Thai women are who are most definitely in the market for foreigners

[elgordo38]

Someone comes on here throwing out a bunch of highfalutin information praising himself and his adventures and all you grousers take the bait. You have provided him his entertainment for the day with your multiple answers. Gotcha. 

[transam]

3 minutes ago, YeahSiam said:

 

It's a myth that Thai women don't care about a farang's looks.

They do care but they're just more willing to ignore those concerns if they think there's a payoff.

Why do you think so many of these women with less-than-attractive farangs almost always have a 'brother' in the background?

BTW, I've seen hundreds of farang men knocked back by Thai women are who are most definitely in the market for foreigners

LOOKS, You reckon.............

 

PS. Our Thai lady friend is about 40-ish, her THAI husband is in his seventies, retired teacher on a nice pension with prime valued property...Now why do you think she teamed up with him....?

PPS. Yes I know of a few who have guys in the background.....Am sure a risk wherever you are on this planet...

[villagefarang]

1 hour ago, williamgeorgeallen said:

in my 10 years here i dont know of any western/thai couples who last more than 10 years, unless they stay together for their kids. it does not make sense to look for a relationship with someone you have nothing in common with. woman are from venus and men are from mars. thai woman are from a separate different solar system from what i can see.

Pleased to meet you, I am one of those people you haven’t met yet.  We have been very much in love for 19 years and we chose not to have kids.  Even with a 20 year age difference we have a lot in common.  We perhaps don’t fit the norm but we do exist.

[williamgeorgeallen]

17 minutes ago, villagefarang said:

Pleased to meet you, I am one of those people you haven’t met yet.  We have been very much in love for 19 years and we chose not to have kids.  Even with a 20 year age difference we have a lot in common.  We perhaps don’t fit the norm but we do exist.

ah finally.

[kennypowers]

You can do better. 

[transam]

8 minutes ago, kennypowers said:

You can do better. 

Than what...?

[Steiner]

Eating with her mouth closed would be a good start...

[Shiver]

As a Westerner reading this and wondering if I have anything to contribute to the thread, the thought passed my mind looking at my own relationship with a Thai, and just this moment realised that I actually like all her friends and her close family (some of the more distant family I have never met).  I also like the majority of their (mostly) Western boyfriends/husbands, though I do feel sorry for some of the women being trapped in a relationship with someone who may be very controlling/jealous/has anger issues etc - that is the exception though and not the rule.

 

So that would suggest that if you want to know what a person is like, then see what kind of company they keep.

I would also ask any prospective Western guy how many casual Thai male friends they have, and if any of them are in their top 3 or at least top 5 friends.  Very few do, but it is a good sign if they do.

 

What I wouldn't do is have a rigid list of things you want and what they should be like.  I would ask myself "what do I have to offer, and what would the ideal person want to see in another person, and if I am like that or am willing to be like that without giving up something important to me?".  Don't look in the mirror when asking this, look inside yourself.  I mean your foundational values that you hold close.

 

Maybe go out with a couple of friends to the kind of places you like to go and see if there are any there.  Avoid the tourist traps like the plague.  See if you can get some casual conversation from them at a table near you (if you forgot your watch/phone (ha!) you might ask the time, or say that you and your friends where having a discussion about foreigners and wonder if you could tell us what it is you like about here and how they came to be here.  It could be anything really, and being with your friends could make you more comfortable than just being a lone wolf looking for prey which would not appear too good and may draw suspicion.  If you talk just out of curiosity I'm sure that within a minute you will be invited to their table and ask what you would like to drink (don't say whiskey!).  Maybe a soft drink or a spy or something.

 

Go slowly, show you have value, and they will respect you more for it rather than just a piece of meat.  My GF took 6 months to win over and I think that is too long...I'd just about given up and she suddenly realised it.  The only other one before that took 6 weeks to win over and I thought that was a long time! A few weeks I would say is about right before getting more serious, but you can flirt all the way from day one if it is done with fun and playfulness.

 

Let us know how you get on.