Becoming a Father

[hocuspocus]

A good friend of mine in Chiang Mai is planning on becoming a father at the age of 65. I have told him he is too old but he insists he is young at heart and there will not be a problem.

Are there many guys in Thailand who have become fathers after the age of 60 years old.

[kailung001]

Give it a go. If it doesn't work then seek for hospitals for advice e.g. fertility treatments (IVF and more...).

[overherebc]

What is he trying to prove and who is he trying to prove it to.

Silly idea at 65 when he should be sitting back and taking it easy.

[Cyclone88]

8 minutes ago, overherebc said:

What is he trying to prove and who is he trying to prove it to.

Silly idea at 65 when he should be sitting back and taking it easy.

Silly Idea? 

Who is anyone to judge?

 

If he's happy, why not.

 

[Pungdo]

Friend of mine with a Filipino wife has a baby due next month, he is 68 and in my opinion mad, I am 10 years younger and have an unplanned 5 yr old daughter here in Thailand, very challenging at my age.

[Shot]

Ask your friend if he is prepared to run up and down the street at 70 teaching his kid how to ride a bike. Ask your friend if he is prepared at 75 to spend endless hours coaching/teaching/participating with his child in sports. Will he be ready at 80 to fend off the dipsticks his child might encounter as a teen?

[pgrahmm]

I see them around pushing strollers from time to time....Looking like it's normal for them....

It might be a beneficial thing......I imagine some have spent their working life living with pressure and turmoil - maybe unable or unwilling to bring children into that world; or maybe their wives didn't.....

If that's what they really want why deny them.....It might mean meaningful, tranquil happiness - maybe for his 1st time.....

 

Better late than never....In his eyes his legacy....

 

If he's an alright, well adjusted, happy guy he has a chance to take it to another level.....Hopefully it was his plan and choice & not a trap....

 

If he's a bar/pub crawler & his wife is from that side of life - it's ominous - for many reasons....

Edited October 10, 2016 by pgrahmm

[upside]

Is he fat? 

[mokwit]

The key consideration here is the increased possibility of the child being autistic.

[little mary sunshine]

What's wrong with the crazy old geezers.  Don't they think

about anyone other than themselves.  Big ego trip to have

a child at 65.   How about the child at age 8,10,or 15.  Who

wil care for and teach the children in their adolescent years.

 

 

 

[silent]

1 hour ago, overherebc said:

What is he trying to prove and who is he trying to prove it to.

Silly idea at 65 when he should be sitting back and taking it easy.

 

Could he really be be proving he's 's a rolling stone, even if can't carry a tune anymore? Either.

Edited October 10, 2016 by silent

[sakaew]

About 15 years ago, I agreed to have a baby with my then long time partner.

Having had a vasectomy 20 years earlier, I trotted off to what is touted to be Thailand's BEST Hospital. A Specialist  Fertility Doctor assured me I was not to old to father a child. They anaesthetized me, and harvested 3 sperm, which they kept in the fridge at their fertility centre. At a cost of 60,000 baht.

 

No more than a week later, some new research from a VERY reputable centre in the US was published. At the time, it was believed that sperm transfer from men below the age of 40 was safe.

(YES  40  NOT 60 or 70.)

 

AS A RESULT OF THAT NEW RESEARCH....the maximum age for sperm donors was lowered.

Why?

Because all the research showed that although the baby may--and often does--emerge as a perfectly normal beautiful child....the chances of that same baby developing several mental defects, mainly autism or schizophrenia, are UNACCEPTABLY HIGH. This tends to happen in a childs' late teens. Not every child is unlucky enough to go this way.

 

So.... long after the father has passed away, the Mother has an unacceptably  high chance of having to raise a mentally deficient--and currently incurable--child.

All on her own.

 

That research was so compelling , that Australia lowered the age at which sperm transfer was recommended, to 35.

I cancelled my fertility treatment.

And blew the   6,000 baht it cost me to harvest those sperm.

EACH AND EVERY TIME sperm transfer is attempted, the cost was 300,000 baht. That was years ago, and I imagine the cost would not have remained the same.

The chances of success is VERY VERY low, even with a young couple.

 

There would have been no doubt the Dear Old Doctor knew perfectly well the dangerous game he was assisting his patients to play...but HEY !!!!! TIT  This is Thailand, as Bernie Trink used to say in his Night Owlcolumn. Anything goes, so long as money changes hands. Who needs  Medical Ethics?

 

Do yourself a favour. Type Elderly men's Sperm Degradation...Fertility Treatment.   into Google

Get the latest research info.

 

When I see a decrepit old codger proudly carrying his new born around Big C....I ALWAYS wonder  (a)  Would he have gone ahead with the treatment, had he bothered to read about the clear dangers associated with the procedure? (b) Can his wife cope with an intellectually disabled child?

[dereklev]

I was 54 when my son was born and I it has given me a new lease of life. It has been a wonderful roller coaster of a ride and I have no regrets whatsoever.

 

However I am 66 now and would not want to embark on that ride now!!

[lemonjelly]

Should buy a Harley instead.

[hgma]

I was 50-54......................enjoy every minute.

Advise.?......50 as a  limit.

choice always yours.

[chicowoodduck]

I'm sure he is a most handsome man.....as the saying goes, one cannot fix stupid! ?

[Ulic]

I am 57, I have no kids and have never been married and I have no intention of having kids.

I am too old, selfish, a flake, and set in my ways. I enjoy seeing my nieces/nephews/and children

of my friends but I have no burning desire to have children in an overpopulated world.

[catman20]

1 hour ago, Cyclone88 said:

Silly Idea? 

Who is anyone to judge?

 

If he's happy, why not.

 

cos its no fare on the child thats why

[hellohello123]

49 minutes ago, little mary sunshine said:

What's wrong with the crazy old geezers.  Don't they think

about anyone other than themselves.  Big ego trip to have

a child at 65.   How about the child at age 8,10,or 15.  Who

wil care for and teach the children in their adolescent years.

 

 

 

People like this infuriate me,

 

sure its their life, they should and can do whatever they want,  just dont negatviely affect innocent people.

 

its people like this that are generally selfish and think only for themselves or think they are some gods gift to the world.

 

the fact is everyone ages, some age  better than others, the average life span of a male is what 70-80 depending on which country you are from

 

have a kid at 65, chances are you will be dead by the time the kid turns 5.  grows up without a father,

your child is going to be younger then your grand kids, or 30 years younger then your kids from all your other failed marriages

 

and to add to that the reality is that the risks of medical issues witht he child increase signfiicantly, (IT DOESNT MATTER HOW HANSUM YOU THINK YOU ARE OR WHAT HOTTIES ON THE STREET CORNER TELL YOU)

 

if you are 65 and you can have kids, your wife is most liekly going to be under 40,

young woman with older man situation,  so its not charming personality or looks they are after

 

just a total trainwreck for everyone involved and who are focred to get involved.

 

get a damn pet cat or dog if you want something to do in your old age

Edited October 10, 2016 by hellohello123

[catman20]

vasectomy  should be compulsory when farangs come to live in thailand

[brewsterbudgen]

As a first-time father myself, at 55, I'd recommend it. 

[lucifer666]

Clearly, 65 is not only his age, it's also his I.Q

[pigeonjake]

36 minutes ago, catman20 said:

vasectomy  should be compulsory when farangs come to live in thailand

 

F££K me some of the things that get said on here get dafter,

 

[Borzandy]

2 hours ago, Cyclone88 said:

Silly Idea? 

Who is anyone to judge?

 

If he's happy, why not.

 

Have to think further, in about 15 years when the kid will need a father's support....

[mankondang]

For a Buddhist country, there are a lot of guys playing God on here.

[connda]

It's selfish imho.  The child grows up with a 'grand-father' instead of a father-figure and based on averages, there is a good chance that 'dad' won't be around to see the child graduate from school no less participate in other life events that a normal parent will be around to see.
With that say, I absolutely love my Thai grand-daughter, and I'm the quintessential doting grand-dad <Puu>, but at the end of the day, the two-year old goes home to mom and dad, and grand-dad and grand-mom relax to an evening of peace and quiet. 
Also, when I pass away, I'll be a respected and cared for picture on the wall that brings back fond rememberances of "Puu", not a person that is supposed to be the center of the child's life, and once gone, a person who's passing bring much mourning and loss. 

If I lost my dad at a young age, I would have been crushed.  No - it's immensely selfish. 

Edited October 10, 2016 by connda

[Americano555]

So the kid will be a fatherless kid at 8 years old. 

[blackcab]

1 hour ago, sakaew said:

When I see a decrepit old codger proudly carrying his new born around Big C....I ALWAYS wonder...

 

If it's his.

[pigeonjake]

there are kids all over this world without parents at all,

its got to be better to have the love of a father for a few years then to never have at all

[connda]

1 hour ago, sakaew said:

When I see a decrepit old codger proudly carrying his new born around Big C....I ALWAYS wonder 

When you see this decrepit old codger proudly carrying a two-year old at Big C, it's my lovely grand-daughter.  :)

Edited October 10, 2016 by connda