Hosting friends in Thailand.

[sipi]

Have you done it in the past?

Would you do it again?

How did it go?

 

The reason I ask is because we have newbie friends who want us to show them around Thailand.

In the past I have jumped at the opportunity, but now I have serious reservations.

 

The glossy brochures aren't exactly an accurate representation.

 

What can a guest expect when they plead to see "the real Thailand"?

 

To host or not to host? I would rather not.

[CharlieH]

I would say dont do it. It will tie you down and if you dont really know them that well (as you said newbie friend) what you think is cool and fun they might smile and go along with but actually hate.

 

Meet them and spend a day here and there or an evening etc but not full time as you may find when its all over they arent friends anymore, could go the other way too and be best buddies but as newbie friends its a gamble.

[1FinickyOne]

Yes. I have done it in the past and am actually currently doing it - though my friend is on his own for a while... it really depends on the guest. I would not want someone who is totally dependent on me... but I think my friends know that... 

 

But, since you already have reservations.... oh, not that type of reservations. You met reservations. 

 

ps - I would guess that Pattaya, Patong, Phuket, Patpong are not really the real Thailand... get them out into the countryside... 

[daveAustin]

Hard work unless you know them really well, like family. Take them on a train ride, they'll love that. 

[pgrahmm]

Newbie friends have unknown habits/agendas/expectations....

In all good faith I can't place my wife & family around somebody I'm not 95% certain of....

 

Like most Thai wive's mine is a gracious & good hostess - but - she REALLY only prefers to have family interaction, even then she's a shy/private person - I'm not shy; but also do not go seeking attention.....

 

Personally, my days of inviting wild cards/trouble into my home or life are over....

 

The ones that we have had visit have gone ok at best....Usually there's one of them that one of us isn't too keen on - then we have to squire them around as good hosts......

 

Frankly, I'd rather not + that goes for any reciprocal invite to their country.....

 

We both prefer independent travel & exploration together alone over IOU's.....Maybe a meet up for dinner with sharing a few suggestions, but that's about it.....

[Morch]

In the past, yes. Nowadays, not so much.

 

Really depends how well you know the guests, and figuring out what their "ideal" trip/vacation is. That's not something all that easy to manage even with family.

 

I'd probably stick to giving out in-depth advice planning their stay, meet and hang out a bit, perhaps join for a couple of days. Other than that, let them experience it on their own. Thailand ain't too hard on first-timers, and they can always contact if something comes up.

 

It's nicer with people who've been here once or twice, and want something a bit different, or are past the obvious tourists traps.

[swissie]

Sipi is a wise man. Most of the time. He will do the right thing:

-Half of the time he will herd the guests up and down Walking Street in Pattaya and the the other half of the time he will bog them down somewhere in the sticks.

At the end of their stay, Sipi will ask them "so, what is the real Thailand for you"?
Cheers.
PS: If the guests are members of the Jehovas Witnesses, I would skip Walking Street.

[Hutch68]

Yes done it many times very entertaining showing first timers round it's great fun watching their eyes pop out of their head's.

May I suggest Bangla road in Patong, plenty of gash down there to keep you and your friend's happy.

[sipi]

One lot are a family of five who have never been on a plane and want to visit a "typical Thai village".

I can't see that ending well.

[Hutch68]

10 minutes ago, sipi said:

One lot are a family of five who have never been on a plane and want to visit a "typical Thai village".

I can't see that ending well.

I live in one of those, you are most welcome to come see me.

[Hutch68]

Bring some sausages and a couple of tins of spam please.

[cyberfarang]

9 hours ago, CharlieH said:

I would say dont do it. It will tie you down and if you dont really know them that well (as you said newbie friend) what you think is cool and fun they might smile and go along with but actually hate.

 

Meet them and spend a day here and there or an evening etc but not full time as you may find when its all over they arent friends anymore, could go the other way too and be best buddies but as newbie friends its a gamble.

So right.

 

In the past I`ve had so called friends or extended family members that I wasn`t really close with in England, email me saying; they are coming to Chiang Mai, would love to meet me and could I show them around. Then I ended up staying in the same hotel with them for 3 days and 2 nights and taking them on tours, all at my own expense. Then we said our goodbyes, they returned to England and not even an email to say they arrived back safely or a thanks. After which hardly ever heard from them again.

 

Now when old friends, extended family or acquaintances messages me saying they are visiting Chiang Mai, I make my excuses and say I`ll be away when they arrive and sorry to have missed them. I would advise the OP to do the same.

[Hutch68]

1 minute ago, cyberfarang said:

So right.

 

In the past I`ve had so called friends or extended family members that I wasn`t really close with in England, email me saying; they are coming to Chiang Mai, would love to meet me and could I show them around. Then I ended up staying in the same hotel with them for 3 days and 2 nights and taking them on tours, all at my own expense. Then we said our goodbyes, they returned to England and not even an email to say they arrived back safely or a thanks. After which hardly ever heard from them again.

 

Now when old friends, extended family or acquaintances messages me saying they are visiting Chiang Mai, I make my excuses and say I`ll be away when they arrive and sorry to have missed them. I would advise the OP to do the same.

[Ulysses G.]

5 hours ago, Hutch68 said:

Yes done it many times very entertaining showing first timers round it's great fun watching their eyes pop out of their head's.

May I suggest Bangla road in Patong, plenty of gash down there to keep you and your friend's happy.

One time a friend of a friend - a very old guy - wanted to see Patpong, back when it was the place to go. He had already been to Bangkok on the way to Chiang Mai and thought he had already seen it. He got a taxi every night and asked to go to Patpong, but when he described it, it was one of those huge expensive soapy places. The taxi driver must have been getting a commission. He never got to Patpong at all. 

Anyway, he offered to buy me a round trip plane ticket from Chiang Mai to Bangkok and put me up in a hotel to show him Patpong and make sure he really saw it. I saved him from going with a ladyboy by mistake and he ended up with some old slapper, but she was a real female. He was happy and I got a free trip to Bangkok. 

[sipi]

3 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

So right.

 

In the past I`ve had so called friends or extended family members that I wasn`t really close with in England, email me saying; they are coming to Chiang Mai, would love to meet me and could I show them around. Then I ended up staying in the same hotel with them for 3 days and 2 nights and taking them on tours, all at my own expense. Then we said our goodbyes, they returned to England and not even an email to say they arrived back safely or a thanks. After which hardly ever heard from them again.

 

Now when old friends, extended family or acquaintances messages me saying they are visiting Chiang Mai, I make my excuses and say I`ll be away when they arrive and sorry to have missed them. I would advise the OP to do the same.

Our one experience was the same. Seems a common theme. A bit relieved it isn't just us.

Advice taken, thanks.

[Notmyploblem]

OP you are jaded, they are not. You are over thinking this.

[sipi]

18 minutes ago, Notmyploblem said:

OP you are jaded, they are not. You are over thinking this.

How did you personal hosting experiences go?

Where did you go and for how long?

[wwest5829]

13 hours ago, pgrahmm said:

Newbie friends have unknown habits/agendas/expectations....

In all good faith I can't place my wife & family around somebody I'm not 95% certain of....

 

Like most Thai wive's mine is a gracious & good hostess - but - she REALLY only prefers to have family interaction, even then she's a shy/private person - I'm not shy; but also do not go seeking attention.....

 

Personally, my days of inviting wild cards/trouble into my home or life are over....

 

The ones that we have had visit have gone ok at best....Usually there's one of them that one of us isn't too keen on - then we have to squire them around as good hosts......

 

Frankly, I'd rather not + that goes for any reciprocal invite to their country.....

 

We both prefer independent travel & exploration together alone over IOU's.....Maybe a meet up for dinner with sharing a few suggestions, but that's about it.....

Agree but admit due to having taught for 41 years, I am still drawn to introducing new experiences, sites, etc. to those who are new to our north country. I keep a list of places to take guests. Having a car and enjoying travel myself does not hurt. Just had visitors in from Bangkok and have taken them around Chiang Mai, Doi Inthanon, etc. well, not exactly strangers as potential new family.

[Notmyploblem]

How did you personal hosting experiences go?
Where did you go and for how long?

I limit it to Bangkok but offer advice on anywhere else. My friends male and female are open minded so easy to please.

[sipi]

44 minutes ago, Notmyploblem said:

I limit it to Bangkok but offer advice on anywhere else. My friends male and female are open minded so easy to please.

Ok that is a start. Did they stay with you and eat Thai food? How did they find the weather? What other advice can you offer?

With one lot we are talking about Mum and Dad and teenage kids who are going to a Muay Thai camp with my son in Phuket and have some free time later. I guess KSR might be fun for a few hours and  a poke around Bangkok. Should they do a Mekong cruise or the JEATH railway?

Open to your advice.

 

Edit. We are getting a bit off track here. I know where they can go.

The thread is specifically about hosting guests.

[sanukjim]

15 hours ago, CharlieH said:

I would say dont do it. It will tie you down and if you dont really know them that well (as you said newbie friend) what you think is cool and fun they might smile and go along with but actually hate.

 

Meet them and spend a day here and there or an evening etc but not full time as you may find when its all over they arent friends anymore, could go the other way too and be best buddies but as newbie friends its a gamble.

I agree with Cherlieh,Since they are people that you are unfamiliar with .I have brought many friends and relatives here in the last 30 years (the first 10 years I was too busy working in the area) and some I just let them go as they pleased and some I escorted around on tours and ended up introducing new and loyal people to Thailand.But I knew what each of them would have been interested in.You don't know these people and their likes.

[1FinickyOne]

54 minutes ago, sipi said:

Ok that is a start. Did they stay with you and eat Thai food? How did they find the weather? What other advice can you offer?

With one lot we are talking about Mum and Dad and teenage kids who are going to a Muay Thai camp with my son in Phuket and have some free time later. I guess KSR might be fun for a few hours and  a poke around Bangkok. Should they do a Mekong cruise or the JEATH railway?

Open to your advice.

 

Edit. We are getting a bit off track here. I know where they can go.

The thread is specifically about hosting guests.

you present the options and leave it to them to decide what they want to see and do... send them on day trips if it is not something you want to do... I never have guests stay in my home. I need my time too and it is my duty to set limits so they do not impose... most of my guests have loved a visit into my village for an afternoon... remember, everything is new for them. 

[sipi]

This particular family I know quite well as they do boxing with my son 3 days a week, but not exactly close friends.

Others we barely know.

A wee trip to the village might be worth it for them, however that basically involves a one hour flight from Bkk then 4 hours drive, then turn around. Might just meet them in Phuket and find another local village to explore.

[Destiny1990]

My parents visit me for the last 8 years almost every every year for aprox  3 months December January February they always rent a seaview condo in Jomtien and are enjoying themselves.During their 3 months of stay they often visit other cities in Thailand they like Phuket, Huahin ,Bangkok and Chiang mai and also they visit other countries nearby with cruise ships trips leaving from the Leam  Chabang port seems they are doing fine.The only thing bothers them is the long flight of 10 hours in comparison with Marlbella being only 2 hours for them.

[maybefitz]

Having done this a number of times, mixed results. Some very grateful visitors, but a couple of free loaders have made me wary. Offer the basic and see how it goes.

[sipi]

As mentioned earlier they have never been on a plane. I guess when they arrive in Phuket they will already be overwhelmed by it all, before even starting. However they are easy going and will adapt quickly. After a week at boxing school they should be settled and familiar. As much as they really want to visit the village I think it will be too much. Frankly I don't care if they stay a year but the boredom might be too much.

Anyway I thought asking a broad general question about hosting might offer some insight, which it has. 

I am sure there will be more in the future so am interested in other experiences. 

[Lucky mike]

Guests are like fish after about 3 days they start to go off !

[tonray]

I never support hosting except for a couple of nights at first. I act as their guide in finding suitable accommodation and in getting them acclimated. much better to keep your space and help them find their own.

[ChangMaiSausage]

Acted as a guide for my family and friends in Chiang Mai, Krabi and Bangkok no issues as I knew what they enjoy (most of the time) 

 

The only  complaints came from my older sister who wanted to sit and sunbathe all of the trip, rather than checkout the sights in CM.  I explained that the week in CM was more about sight seeing and that Krabi (one week later) would be the best place to sun bathe.  Nah, she complained daily the whole week only to go to Krabi and burn her ass off on the first day, she spent the next two days in her room after that!

 

Bangkok there is so much to see in the surrounding area, first time weekend market or even a nighttime market a meal/trip up the river.... the list is huge.   

[tonray]

As far as tour guiding goes, before they arrive I ask friends to make a list of 5 to 10 things they must see or do. Then I can help them get that done (not that I necessarily go with them to see the Grand Palace again !) but to smooth their trip planning. Then I usually fill in with a few uniquely Thailand things (real street markets, real Thai food haunts) where I take them directly and this usually works pretty well. keeps them happy as I don't feel like I am monopolizing their holiday and they also get to see/do some things that they are unlikely to find in any guide book.