grand child best thing for retired people

[lovelomsak]

My thai stepdaughter had a baby girl in Dec. Being Thailand my wife and I will raise her.

 This has turned out to be the best experience of my life. I recommend to anyone retired here and bored or living without  a purpose get a baby in the house. 

  This baby has changed our lives. I now look forward to each day again. Not as cranky, more understanding,forgiving etc. I am energized the most in years.All because of a baby.. I now feel every retired household should have a baby in it.

  The smiles. The laughter. It is impossible not to feel full of love and happiness just seeing her smile. Her laugh  warms me right through.

 So any lonely,out of sorts,cranky old guys here want the cure get a baby in the house. Life will pick right up.

  Nest time you see an old foreigner with a baby and a young wife . You may be seeing a very happy man. We should thank Thailand for allowing old guys to come here and have a young family. It is definetely the best way for old men to spend their last years. Living in a happy household..

 

 

[GinBoy2]

Each to his own, but not for me.

I've had my kids, and I love them to death, but even when I was younger babies and small kids are hard work.

Nowadays I love being with my Granddaughter, but I'm always happy that I give her back to Mom for all the 'hard work' stuff.

[Dmaxdan]

Our two and a half year old grandson lives with us. Similar circumstances, his mother is away working, his father...well who knows.
He can be a bit of a handful, the terrible twos and all that but most of the time he is a a lot of fun. The only potential problem we have is so far he only really speaks English which confuses pretty much everyone else. I'm guessing he will pick up Thai eventually.


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[Crossy]

3 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

Nowadays I love being with my Granddaughter, but I'm always happy that I give her back to Mom for all the 'hard work' stuff.

Yeah, us too. I love having the grandkids round, they're all big enough to be fun with, swimming, football etc.

 

But we're done with babies, noisy things that need attention at both ends, often at the same time, hand them back to mum.

 

[poohy]

You are off your head!!!

My stepdaughter stayed for a week with her newish born, complete and  utter and total misery!

Never want to see it again 

[colinneil]

lovelomsak, you crazy or what?

Bugger having babies around, they make too much noise.

My wife says it is enough having 1 big baby to take care of, ME.

[GinBoy2]

We had the misfortune over Christmas that we had both my daughters some to visit us in Rapid City, then somehow my youngest daughter persuaded my wife that looking after their 6 month baby for a couple of days while her and her bf went to Minneapolis to visit some friends would be a good idea, so they could party for the New Year

Baaaaad idea. Sceaming babies, poop, pee, diapers, never again

[BEVUP]

38 minutes ago, lovelomsak said:

Nest time you see an old foreigner with a baby and a young wife . You may be seeing a very happy man. We should thank Thailand for allowing old guys to come here and have a young family. It is definetely the best way for old men to spend their last years. Living in a happy household..

 

 

Have no idea why these people do this

After having worked all your life & no doubt having raised kids (if not then ok ), & eventually saving for those retirement years, the young wife wants a baby

Is it because the young wife has no kids & if so why do retirees assist instead of her finding a young man

Is it for further security knowing the westerner will look after child

Some of these retirees will never see their kid/s come to maturity 

[lovelomsak]

Thanks for all the replies. 

I was a single man all my life and for me having a family is a whole new frontier. I quess we are really fortunate too. 

 She seldom cries just laughs,smiles,yells with joy. Perhaps we got lucky and got a real gem of a baby.

  As far as pampers(diapers) and such the wife handles all that. She sleeps with us when I go to bed I see her sleeping when I wake up I see her sleeping it is just to cute for words. She has a playpen big enough for all three of us . We play all day. She loves water and loves her baths. She is so happy all the time I cannot help but be happy.

  But yes I am worried when the terrible 2's will come. But at the moment would not trade her for anything.

[GinBoy2]

1 hour ago, lovelomsak said:

Thanks for all the replies. 

I was a single man all my life and for me having a family is a whole new frontier. I quess we are really fortunate too. 

 She seldom cries just laughs,smiles,yells with joy. Perhaps we got lucky and got a real gem of a baby.

  As far as pampers(diapers) and such the wife handles all that. She sleeps with us when I go to bed I see her sleeping when I wake up I see her sleeping it is just to cute for words. She has a playpen big enough for all three of us . We play all day. She loves water and loves her baths. She is so happy all the time I cannot help but be happy.

  But yes I am worried when the terrible 2's will come. But at the moment would not trade her for anything.

I’m glad that it’s making you happy.

 

Don’t get any of us wrong. For most people having children brings a great deal of happiness into our lives, and speaking for myself it’s been one of the great joys of my life. To this day I speak with my eldest daughter daily, if not twice a day we’re so close. The younger one, well she’s busy with her own kids, so that may tell you something.

 

What you are hearing from all of us is, that most of the community had their kids in previous lives when we were younger. We did all the babies, toddlers, and don’t get me going on teenager things, and it’s exhausting. 

 

So the idea of doing it all over again is horrifying, this is for most of us time to enjoy Grandkids without the work

 

 

[lovelomsak]

9 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

I’m glad that it’s making you happy.

 

Don’t get any of us wrong. For most people having children brings a great deal of happiness into our lives, and speaking for myself it’s been one of the great joys of my life. To this day I speak with my eldest daughter daily, if not twice a day we’re so close. The younger one, well she’s busy with her own kids, so that may tell you something.

 

What you are hearing from all of us is, that most of the community had their kids in previous lives when we were younger. We did all the babies, toddlers, and don’t get me going on teenager things, and it’s exhausting. 

 

So the idea of doing it all over again is horrifying, this is for most of us time to enjoy Grandkids without the work

 

 

I think you are right now i read these posts for me it is first time and really exciting. Like my older sister told me if it had been 40 years ago I might have had a different perspective. Now I have the time. Also people like yourself know the ups and downs. It is not all giggles and laughter I am sure. But have not got there yet.

[DoctorG]

Rather have a dog myself thanks.

[connda]

I'm not sure about taking on the responsibly to 'raise' a grandchild.  The beauty about being a grandparent is that you can enjoy the wonders of childhood, but when the kid starts to act out, you can give them back to the parent. 

I've done the child-rearing full-meal deal before.  That was good enough.  I enjoy the company of grandkids for a visit.  I'll let the parents learn to be parents.  They can let the retirees be retirees.  However, if raising children is how you define retirement, more power to ya.  Best of luck!

Edited April 9, 2018 by connda

[Toscano]

My wife and I have her two granddaughters 10 and 7 living with us .  Their father and mother are split up though both live nearby .  Father , my wife's son is a very busy agricultural contractor , their mother works days one week and nights the next , she has a new boyfriend and baby .  My wife organizes good schooling , uniforms and text books .  I get on very well with them both , no problem when the come home from school and come screaming into the house , we love them and having them with us , they keep us feeling young .

[smotherb]

2 hours ago, lovelomsak said:

Thanks for all the replies. 

I was a single man all my life and for me having a family is a whole new frontier. I quess we are really fortunate too. 

 She seldom cries just laughs,smiles,yells with joy. Perhaps we got lucky and got a real gem of a baby.

  As far as pampers(diapers) and such the wife handles all that. She sleeps with us when I go to bed I see her sleeping when I wake up I see her sleeping it is just to cute for words. She has a playpen big enough for all three of us . We play all day. She loves water and loves her baths. She is so happy all the time I cannot help but be happy.

  But yes I am worried when the terrible 2's will come. But at the moment would not trade her for anything.

Yeah, you have gotten some grief from some of our posters, but I see your point; especially if she is a pleasant and untroubled baby. I think you have many more years of happiness ahead of you.

 

My wife and I have our grandson here most weekends and often take him with us when visiting friends around Thailand. He is now three and a half years old and speaks Thai, Filipino and English. We have relived the best parts of our son's growing-up. We have watched the little guy learn to feed himself, take his first steps, get potty-trained, and learn which language to use with each parent and grandparent. My Thai counterpart and I used to struggle to communicate, now we take our grandson with us and he translates; usually to his advantage--he has learned to work us all. He is our only grandchild and the only male grandchild of the Thai grandparents parents.

 

He likes to be with me, or makes me believe it anyway. I joke and play with him and usually do what he likes, and I really enjoy showing him new things. I must admit, I am especially proud of his caucasian looks. He is only one-quarter caucasian--my wife is Filipina, our son is half-Filipino and our daughter-in-law is full Thai--but the little guy has light skin, high-nose, light brown eyes and brown hair.  However, it is good to have his mother come to pick him up. We also like our privacy and freedom; we are experiencing the best of both worlds.

[Neeranam]

I can't wait to have grand kids.

My teenage daughters are generally expensive and want nothing to do with me. Hopefully they will get better as they get older. The 15 y/o one is the worst, took her to Oz, and she sits in the hotel playing with her phone.today forced her to go to the city and moaned the whole way, not wanting to walk, even shopping.

 

Kids when over 60, no thanks. Time for freedom, travel and renunciation.

[gaviny]

I'm lucky I have my GFs nephew with us most of the time for last 2 years n he turns 4 today.He still lives with the mum next door and so I dont have to take care of him except in monetary terms but he keeps me occupied and yes he is now bilingual and is already my translator 555.

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[smotherb]

4 hours ago, BEVUP said:

Have no idea why these people do this

After having worked all your life & no doubt having raised kids (if not then ok ), & eventually saving for those retirement years, the young wife wants a baby

Is it because the young wife has no kids & if so why do retirees assist instead of her finding a young man

Is it for further security knowing the westerner will look after child

Some of these retirees will never see their kid/s come to maturity 

So, you are wondering why a man would not help his younger wife find a younger man to give her a baby. Are you serious? Other than the obvious emotional restraints, do you really think that younger man will be around to support the kid? Your arguments may be popular, but not well-founded. Most men in the sixties and many in their seventies can still enjoy sex and still impregnate a fertile woman. Look at the divorce rate, or separation rate, of parents. Fifty percent or more of couples will split, many of the children will never see one of their parents again--and many more may be raised by grandmothers. So what if the father dies, it happens; my father was killed when I was a baby. And, you may be surprised at how many older men, who became fathers in their fifties or sixties will see their kids grow-up; let's face it, living into your eighties is almost a norm. And, if a man has the wherewithal to financially provide for a child, even after his death; how much better is that than having a ne're-do-well father who may not even be around to help.

[watcharacters]

 

 

I agree fully with the OP.    

 

Such kids are fantastic as long as when all is said and done, they go home where they belong.

 

 

[Neeranam]

Personally I could never raise another man's child, especially in Thailand.I've been asked but refused. I've been here for most my life and seen too many horror stories, especially with farang marrying women with make children. No bloody chance.

I understand the OP, it's wonderful the first few years, but remember they get older.

[Krataiboy]

I knew we were taking a gamble when my wife - half my age - agreed to have my child when I was well into my sixties. As things turned out, it was the best move we ever made.

 

Despite being the stepfather to four youngsters from my wife's previous marriage, I had never before fathered a child of my own. Now I know what I was missing - the most astounding and rewarding experience of my long life, from the excitement of the pregnancy and the birth (Yes, I have the photos!) to the present. Best of all, the arrival of a daughter of our own bonded the whole family like superglue.

 

I fully understand why some people consider it unwise - even irresponsible - to become a dad at such an advanced age. But life surely is the most precious gift anyone can give a child. In return our lovely luk kreung daughter has certainly lit up ours, keeping us on our toes and young in spirit.

 

If I have one regret, it is that I am unlikely to be around to see our youngest marry, let alone dandle her children on my knee. But on the plus side, her mother and siblings being there offer to love and support for many years to come.

 

I expect she will miss me when I'm gone (what kind of dad will I have been if she doesn't?). But time is a great healer and she's smart enough to have worked out that I won't always be around to nag her about her addiction to her wretched smartphone.

 

Like I keep telling her, always try and look on the bright side!

Edited April 9, 2018 by Krataiboy

[watcharacters]

3 minutes ago, Krataiboy said:

I knew we were taking a gamble when my wife - half my age - agreed to have my child when I was well into my sixties. As things turned out, it was the best move we ever made.

 

Despite being the stepfather to four youngsters from my wife's previous marriage, I had never before fathered a child of my own. Now I know what I was missing - the most astounding and rewarding experience of my long life, from pregnancy to the present. The arrival of a daughter of our own worked like superglue to bond us all closer.

 

I fully understand why some people consider it unwise - even irresponsible - to become a dad at such an advanced age. But life surely is the most precious gift anyone can give a child. In return our lovely luk kreung daughter has certainly lit up ours, keeping us on our toes and young in spirit.

 

If I have one regret, it is that I am unlikely to be around to see her marry, let alone dandle her children on my knee. But on the plus side, her mother and siblings being there offer to love and support for many years to come.

 

I expect she will miss me when I'm gone (what kind of dad will I have been if she doesn't?). But time is a great healer and she's smart enough to have worked out that I won't always be around to nag her about her addiction to her wretched smartphone.

 

Like I keep telling her, always try and look on the bright side!

 

 

Truly to each his own but a  child has no choice.

 

I can't help but think it's unfair for a  falang to impregnate a  much younger wife.     I don't think about the wife or falang (father) but rather the child.

 

But we all do what we think is best, I hope. 

Edited April 9, 2018 by watcharacters

[GinBoy2]

I think we're kinda breaking into camps here.

Those of us who have had our kids at, dare I say the 'usual' age, now all grown up.

Those who have never been parents.

Older guys with adult kids, but with much younger childless Thai wives.

The situations are so different, no-one can generalize, but what I 'think' we can all agree on, is that kids are a blessing, and in most cases bring us great joy and fulfilment

[Krataiboy]

1 minute ago, watcharacters said:

 

 

Truly to each his own but a  child has no choice.

 

I can't help but think it's unfair for falangs to impregnate much younger wives.     I don't think about the wife or falang (father) but rather the child.

 

But we all do what we think is best, I hope. 

You're not an antinatalist are you?

 

If not, I find your argument rather odd. No child has a choice about being born. And many lose one or more parents to death or divorce. But who would chose NOT to be born. Would you? I would hope most children are glad they were created. Ours certainly is!

Edited April 9, 2018 by Krataiboy

[1FinickyOne]

It can be a rollercoaster too... We have been raising a niece. When she went into a 4 day coma at 18 months, you cannot imagine the pain. She is fine now and moving ahead in her schooling, but even the times of fever and being up all night unwell were tough. But, my first time raising a kid and I am at the right age to have enjoyed the process. I have time and patience now that I would not have had when I was young... I don't know how young working people manage. Enjoy. It is a great thing for the kid to have doting care givers raise them with love... 

[dotpoom]

May you have many more happy and joyous years together. GB.

[lovelomsak]

I want to add a a little something .

  I read a long time ago that a person acquires all their long lasting life skills by the age of 2 (perhaps a good explaination for terrible 2's). I want to believe this. So I treat raising her with that in mind. We try very hard to give her stability from the start,I even talk to her as an adult .She gets so much love and positive reinforcement since birth.She seldom fusses. I put that down to being well adjusted with no emotional issues as of yet. 

  With the 2 year life skill thought I feel we can do out best while I am here if I die after she is 2 I hope she has what she needs to have a full happy life.Happy is the priority. She is a grand child not my child so I feel it is not necessary I see her through to adulthood. I just want to give her a real good start in life. Of course the longer I am here to share with her the better.

   Like one poster stated it bonded the family like superglue the same happened here. My stepdaughter used to hate me not even want to be in the same room. Now we are a happy family. It is like there never was problem.

  I will stop do not want have TV start to be a parenting support group.

  

 

[jenny2017]

6 hours ago, colinneil said:

lovelomsak, you crazy or what?

Bugger having babies around, they make too much noise.

My wife says it is enough having 1 big baby to take care of, ME.

A little bit Lhao Khao in mom's nom and the baby sleeps through.....

[watcharacters]

29 minutes ago, Krataiboy said:

You're not an antinatalist are you?

 

If not, I find your argument rather odd. No child has a choice about being born. And many lose one or more parents to death or divorce. But who would chose NOT to be born. Would you? I would hope most children are glad they were created. Ours certainly is!

 

 

My opinion stands  in that I think it's selfish for an old falang to father a baby.

 

That's my opinion Sir/Madam.

[Krataiboy]

Just now, watcharacters said:

 

 

My opinion stands  in that I think it's selfish for an old falang to father a baby.

 

That's my opinion Sir/Madam.

What's with the Sir/Madam bit.

 

And you missed out the word "humble" between "That's my" and "opinion".