Retired paraplegic Brit: "I am like a prisoner in my own home"

[faraday]

11 minutes ago, cornishcarlos said:

 

And drug dealers, masquerading as disabled Brits !!!

Colin - aka Pablo- maybe?

 

 

 

[soalbundy]

19 minutes ago, colinneil said:

Yes we live in the wifes  village, but since my accident we have had no help what so ever from any member of my wifes family.

In the  words of  her oldest sister, we dont help farang.

Well Collin, in the words of my youtube guru Eckhart Tolle, ''If you can't avoid a bad situation, if you can't change it, accept it, say yes to it without a negative internal dialogue.''

It would seem that you could avoid it with a move to Khon Khaen even though this wouldn't be easy. I think I only live about 150 km from you and would be willing with physical help as I am sure others here would be as well.

Without knowing of course I would say that you aren't in danger as long as there is no interaction between you and the bad guys, it's annoying yes, but a situation is usually never as bad as the mind makes it out to be, it's what the mind does, it has a subjective relationship to its environment, the ego will judge and wants to be right, its judgements are almost never benign.

[soalbundy]

26 minutes ago, Justfine said:

Ironically I think Isaan is a better place to visit than live. Hardly any tourists go there but it's interesting for a while. But to live there you're surrounded by uneducated hicks. It's the wild east.

 

 

Education has nothing to do with wisdom and you will find a lot of wise 'hicks' in Isaan when you get to know them.

My mother-in-law had a cast iron cooking pot, one of her truly few prized possessions, one day it went missing from the table outside (there is very little theft here) My wife was upset for her and we discussed about who could have stolen it and we should report it to the puu yai but she just shrugged her shoulders and said whoever took it needed it more than her, forget it. 3 days later it was back on the table, it had been brought back, clean, during the night.She can't read or write but she is a very wise lady.

[Justfine]

9 minutes ago, soalbundy said:

Education has nothing to do with wisdom and you will find a lot of wise 'hicks' in Isaan when you get to know them.

My mother-in-law had a cast iron cooking pot, one of her truly few prized possessions, one day it went missing from the table outside (there is very little theft here) My wife was upset for her and we discussed about who could have stolen it and we should report it to the puu yai but she just shrugged her shoulders and said whoever took it needed it more than her, forget it. 3 days later it was back on the table, it had been brought back, clean, during the night.She can't read or write but she is a very wise lady.

Cooking pot story? Seriously?

[owl sees all]

13 minutes ago, Justfine said:

Cooking pot story? Seriously?

Yes!!

 

We had the same problem with the TV remote control. Couldn't find it anywhere. Daughter came home from school and was asked if she had seen it. "No."

 

An hour later it was back on the shelf in front of the TV.

 

Thailand; land of mystery!!

Edited June 14, 2018 by owl sees all

[soalbundy]

4 minutes ago, Justfine said:

Cooking pot story? Seriously?

yes, she showed a quiet dignity, didn't react or let an angry ego take over, she understood instinctively that a greater intelligence flows through you when you stop listening to the never ending babbelings of the mind and it worked, instead of a village drama with suspicions cast about and rising enmity amongst the neighbours she had her pot returned quietly.

[Justfine]

Just now, soalbundy said:

yes, she showed a quiet dignity, didn't react or let an angry ego take over, she understood instinctively that a greater intelligence flows through you when you stop listening to the never ending babbelings of the mind and it worked, instead of a village drama with suspicions cast about and rising enmity amongst the neighbours she had her pot returned quietly.

Could just use another pot.

[soalbundy]

2 minutes ago, owl sees all said:

Yes!!

 

We had the same problem with the TV remote control. Couldn't find it anywhere. Daughter came home from school and was asked if she had seen it. "No."

 

An hour later it was back on the shelf in front of the TV.

 

Thailand; land of mystery!!

House ghost watching tv

[NetJunkie]

On 6/12/2018 at 10:13 AM, webfact said:

She came home from school at lunchtime to check up on him following the murder such was her sense of concern. 

 

Seriously? The wife pops home at lunchtime and we are supposed to think that is a huge show of concern?

[soalbundy]

Just now, Justfine said:

Could just use another pot.

yes but that pot to her was like say your motorbike to you, it was an expensive present from her daughters first wage many years ago.

[owl sees all]

1 minute ago, Justfine said:

Could just use another pot.

She probably could have done, it's true, but there is a serious aspect to this story.

 

The pot was cast iron. These pots are invaluable for giving the family their required dose of iron.

 

If I needed to find the culprit, look for a person (in the village) that once looked anemic but now looks in the best of health. Confront this person and when they admit to the 'borrowing' buy then a cast iron cooking pot.

 

This way everyone's a winner. 

[thaiguzzi]

2 hours ago, colinneil said:

Quick update, Pu yai bahn has just been on the PA talking about the murder.

Saying about the drug problem, and that the police are aware of it know who is in involved and will be keeping an eye on the situation.

So that is good news, a start at least.

If nothing is being done about the problem with this certain drug dealing family, you know the local police are in on it and earning.

Every village headman and local police know who is doing what in the villages. Once it gets too blatant or its harming the community, they generally do something about it.

Worst case scenario the offending problem just "disappears"... Never to be seen again, ie buried 6' under...

 If nothing gets done about it, you will have to use the nearest police dept that is "larger" and more "influential" than the locals ie KK City. Then you may see some arrests.

  My 2 Bahts worth.

Edited June 14, 2018 by thaiguzzi

[watso63]

I've lived in an Isaan village for the past 6 years. Colin's wife is a school director so would presumably have more clout than the average villager. She would also know the Kong Baap are the people to speak to about those she suspects of dealing/using drugs. They have been very effective around my neck of the woods. Not sure about the English spelling but that's how I write it. From what I understand they are plain closed police officers that work undercover relying on tip off's or as some low life's would say "grasser's or snitches.

 

I did read published reports that the victim was taking "speed" (yabba) and drinking with the accused prior to him being clubbed to death with a piece of wood. The 70 year old mother of the victim bears no grudge towards the accused but welcomes justice.

The sound advice seems to be to move away from the problem but the wife as sole carer is averse to the idea. Not ideal for Colin. Well, I genuinely hope things improve for him. OK, I admit to not being gushing with meaningless platitudes and full of fake sympathy but I prefer to live in the real world and life can be tough in an Isaan Moo Baan.

 

Edited June 14, 2018 by watso63
Spelling error

[soalbundy]

2 minutes ago, thaiguzzi said:

If nothing is being done about the problem with this certain drug dealing family, you know the local police are in on it and earning.

Every village headman and local police know who is doing what in the villages. Once it gets too blatant or its harming the community, they generally do something about it.

Worst case scenario the offending problem just "disappears"... Never to be seen again, ie buried 6' under...

 If nothing gets done about it, you will have to use the nearest police dept that is "larger" and more "influential" than the locals ie KK City. Then you may see some arrests.

  My 2 Bahts worth.

That needs careful consideration, if you don't have a strong honest puu yai and a united village  that is asking for some nasty interaction where before it was neutral. Send a lawyer to give the police an anonymous tip by all means but don't let your name get put into circulation

[soalbundy]

6 minutes ago, watso63 said:

I've lived in an Isaan village for the past 6 years. Colin's wife is a school director so would presumably have more clout than the average villager. She would also know the Kong Baap are the people to speak to about those she suspects of dealing/using drugs. They have been very effective around my neck of the woods. Not sure about the English spelling but that's how I write it. From what I understand they are plain closed police officers that work undercover relying on tip off's or as some low life's would say "grasser's or snitches.

 

I did read published reports that the victim was taking "speed" (yabba) and drinking with the accused prior to him being clubbed to death with a piece of wood. The 70 year old mother of the victim bears no grudge towards the accused but welcomes justice.

The sound advice seems to be to move away from the problem but the wife as sole carer is averse to the idea. Not ideal for Colin. Well, I genuinely hope things improve for him. OK, I admit to not being gushing with meaningless platitudes and full of fake sympathy but I prefer to live in the real world and life can be tough in an Isaan Moo Baan.

 

good advice as long as her name is kept out of it

[colinneil]

17 minutes ago, watso63 said:

I've lived in an Isaan village for the past 6 years. Colin's wife is a school director so would presumably have more clout than the average villager. She would also know the Kong Baap are the people to speak to about those she suspects of dealing/using drugs. They have been very effective around my neck of the woods. Not sure about the English spelling but that's how I write it. From what I understand they are plain closed police officers that work undercover relying on tip off's or as some low life's would say "grasser's or snitches.

 

I did read published reports that the victim was taking "speed" (yabba) and drinking with the accused prior to him being clubbed to death with a piece of wood. The 70 year old mother of the victim bears no grudge towards the accused but welcomes justice.

The sound advice seems to be to move away from the problem but the wife as sole carer is averse to the idea. Not ideal for Colin. Well, I genuinely hope things improve for him. OK, I admit to not being gushing with meaningless platitudes and full of fake sympathy but I prefer to live in the real world and life can be tough in an Isaan Moo Baan.

 

If you had read the posts i did on this, you would have noticed that i said they were drinking together prior to the attack.

Also the report you read is not entirely accurate, as he committed the murder with a bottle and concrete block, not a lump of wood. 

 

The accused showed the police ( and all the onlookers my wife included) the 2 items he used to commit the deed.

Edited June 14, 2018 by colinneil

[smotherb]

2 hours ago, colinneil said:

Yes we live in the wifes  village, but since my accident we have had no help what so ever from any member of my wifes family.

In the  words of  her oldest sister, we dont help farang.

I am sorry to hear that. That is one of the benefits of an extended family. On the several occasions when we lived in the PI we always took a young adult member of the family to live with us. Of course, one of the bad things about the PI is that you cannot leave your home unattended or it will be ransacked. I suppose your wife would not let you take on sweet young thing to take care of you.

[tweedledee2]

1 hour ago, owl sees all said:

She probably could have done, it's true, but there is a serious aspect to this story.

 

The pot was cast iron. These pots are invaluable for giving the family their required dose of iron.

 

If I needed to find the culprit, look for a person (in the village) that once looked anemic but now looks in the best of health. Confront this person and when they admit to the 'borrowing' buy then a cast iron cooking pot.

 

This way everyone's a winner. 

With the amount of chicken blood Thais eat, I doubt there's any iron deficiency.

[watso63]

11 minutes ago, colinneil said:

If you had read the posts i did on this, you would have noticed that i said they were drinking together prior to the attack.

Also the report you read is not entirely accurate, as he committed the murder with a bottle and concrete block, not a lump of wood. 

 

The accused showed the police ( and all the onlookers my wife included) the 2 items he used to commit the deed.

Fair enough about the attack weapons but what about the victim popping Yabba? Still, it is a horrible incident so close to your home. You know how easy going the village people are. I've seen family members going into debt to pay for their relaives to buy their way out of prison so they can do what they did before. I hate drugs and the crime that revolves around the trade in them. Thing is the cream, eg Bill Clinton and his massive drug running activities in Arkansas always skim the top line. Thaksin and Duterte might be a bit extreme but...

[colinneil]

5 minutes ago, watso63 said:

Fair enough about the attack weapons but what about the victim popping Yabba? Still, it is a horrible incident so close to your home. You know how easy going the village people are. I've seen family members going into debt to pay for their relaives to buy their way out of prison so they can do what they did before. I hate drugs and the crime that revolves around the trade in them. Thing is the cream, eg Bill Clinton and his massive drug running activities in Arkansas always skim the top line. Thaksin and Duterte might be a bit extreme but...

 Yes mate there is a big possibility they were taking drugs, but at the re enactment the murderer said they had been drinking, no mention of drugs, but the police said he was tested at the police station for drugs and his pee was purple.

[watso63]

2 minutes ago, colinneil said:

 Yes mate there is a big possibility they were taking drugs, but at the re enactment the murderer said they had been drinking, no mention of drugs, but the police said he was tested at the police station for drugs and his pee was purple.

Anyway, all the best and I hope your Poo ya baan can get a grip. Cheers

[Odysseus123]

Hang  in there Colin...

 

You are a very gutsy bloke, indeed.

[jenny2017]

Dear Colin,

 

    "I am like a prisoner in my own home"

 

  Yesterday when I went shopping and looked around me, this sentence went through my head and I really felt sad for you because you can't do things that are "normal" for others.

 

We haven't met each other, but reading your posts gives me the feeling that we know each other. Really time for a chat. I'll send you a message once I know exactly when I'm off. 

 

  Just walking around at the night market with all the eye candies, the smell of food, the people, the smiles, the conversations, etc. You can't even get upset about the good drivers on the roads, I'm sure you'd be happy to drive around here. Things are changing if you can't do them trapped in your own bed.  

 

  That's something you haven't seen for a while and it's part of life here. I know what your life must look like because of my friend back home who had to experience similar problems after an accident that wasn't his fault. But we took him out, went to parties, got drunk and we even had a nice laugh when he fell out of his wheelchair and broke his leg. He didn't feel any pain. 

 

When I think about it now it must have helped him a lot to be with us, not being trapped in his bed. 

 

And I guess that's part of your feelings to be a prisoner in your own home. When I come by, please think about what you'd like to do, we could drive to a pub, just get you out of your bed for a while. Talk soon, have a good one. 

 

 

[Golden Triangle]

Colin, did you ever serve in HM Forces before retiring here ? The only reason I ask is that I am a member of the Royal British Legion and you could well be in line for some financial aid if you have served.

 

Keep your chin up mate, I know it's not good or nice, but as I'm sure you are aware, things can only get better.

 

And I did vote for you in POTY ?

[theoldgit]

Troll post and responses removed, please show a modicum of decency.

[Sheryl]

If nothing is being done about the problem with this certain drug dealing family, you know the local police are in on it and earning.
Every village headman and local police know who is doing what in the villages. Once it gets too blatant or its harming the community, they generally do something about it.
Worst case scenario the offending problem just "disappears"... Never to be seen again, ie buried 6' under...
 If nothing gets done about it, you will have to use the nearest police dept that is "larger" and more "influential" than the locals ie KK City. Then you may see some arrests.
  My 2 Bahts worth.

Absoluty correct.

But trying to call in higher up powers is not without risk. They may also get in on the action and even if not, doing this will anger the offenders. Who might seek revenge.

As I read the situation it is as much about peace of mind as it is physical safety. Colin does not want to be living on edge, always wondering what that sound was, nor should he. He is paraplegic and home alone during the day. This murder struck home both because he knew tge man and because tbe victim was likewise disabled, a stark reminder if his own vulnerability.

He needs to live somewhere he feels reasonably secure. For him to take action tbat might provoke revenge would not serve that purpose.

Sent from my SM-J701F using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

[lvr181]

Well, many have had their say on Colin's "status" and some good advice offered but let Colin decide what suits him best or what he is comfortable with (given the various choices).

 

He now knows that many have empathy for his disability and his circumstances, perhaps the time has come for the well intentioned advice (mainly)to cease BUT a personal visit may not go astray and be hopefully welcomed. I, among others would like to visit him say 'Hi' over a beer or whatever and see if there was anything we could do in a practical sense to help him.

 

Unfortunately at this time, I am 10hrs flying time away and cannot do it. Hopefully I would get a chance in the future.

 

Take care Colin, it's a hard row to hoe but only you can do it. I admire your spirit and wish that better may come your way.

[bannork]

Oscar had it right. Some people know the price of everything, and the value of nothing.

[Crossy]

A flame post and replies have been removed.

 

[NetJunkie]

On 6/12/2018 at 10:13 AM, webfact said:

He said that he has to spend 16 hours a day in bed and due to the nature of his injuries he can only spend a small amount of time in a wheelchair. 

 

It would seem that it is the OP's physical condition that is making him a "prisoner", not the local crime.