4 minutes ago, dcsw53 said:

That is when the left foot points towards the 3 and the right foot points towards the 9?

Or am i getting it wrong?

 

6 hours ago, ballpoint said:

If you are waiting for a rainy day to make a profit I suggest you might want to water down your expectations!

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2 hours ago, sanuk711 said:

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Is that Alpacapulco beach?

Children's Logic:
"Give me a sentence about a public servant," said the teacher.
Little Johnny wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant."
The teacher took the lad aside to correct him.
"Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked.
"Of course," said the little Johnny confidently. 'It means carrying a child."

A man asked a waiter to take a bottle of Merlot to an unusually attractive woman sitting alone at a table in a cozy little restaurant.

So the waiter took the Merlot to the woman and said, 'This is from the gentleman seated over there'

..... and indicated the sender with a nod of his head.

She stared at the wine coolly for a few seconds, not looking at the man, then decided to send a reply to him by a note. The waiter, who was lingering nearby for a response, took the note from her and conveyed it to the gentleman.

The note read: 'For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million dollars in the bank and 7 inches in your pants'.

After reading the note, the man decided to compose one of his own in return.

He folded his note, handed it to the waiter and asked him to deliver it to the lady.

It read:

'Just to let you know things aren't always what they appear to be. I have a Ferrari Maranello, a BMW Z8, a Mercedes CL600, and a Porsche Turbo in my several garages. I have beautiful homes in Aspen and Miami, and a 10,000 acre ranch in Louisiana. And there is over twenty million dollars in my bank accounts and portfolio.

But, not even for a woman as beautiful as you, would I cut off three inches. Just send the wine back.'

I saw a bumper sticker on a car yesterday that said, "I Miss Liverpool."
So I smashed the window and stole the radio.

Corduroy pillows. They're making headlines!

They had to get a translator at the benefits office today.
Some cheeky sod came in speaking English.

If you're having a bad day, just remember someone is dating your ex and thinking they got lucky.