Are you married to a Thai woman – Any Snippets of Advice .

[marcusarelus]

29 minutes ago, totally thaied up said:

The whole point is to find someone that is compatible with you.

If I wanted a person who was compatible I'd have married a horny old guy who liked watching naked people prance around.  

 

Compatibility has nothing to do with marriage. 

[totally thaied up]

3 minutes ago, marcusarelus said:

Compatibility has nothing to do with marriage. 

Rubbish - that is all I can say. If my wife and I did not like the same things and have very similar hobbies, I would not be sticking around. Compatibility is way more than a good bang. 

[marcusarelus]

27 minutes ago, totally thaied up said:

Rubbish - that is all I can say. If my wife and I did not like the same things and have very similar hobbies, I would not be sticking around. Compatibility is way more than a good bang. 

Rubbish back at ya times 10.  But I do have a logical argument.  My wife likes chick flix's I don't.  My wife likes dogs in girlie outfits.  I don't.  My wife likes to load 500 ton steel structures onto boats.  I don't.  My wife likes to supervise dirty, stinky welders and other steel fabricators.  I don't.  My wife likes to read classical Thai poets.  I don't.  My wife likes a spotless home.  I don't.  I like hard core S&M and swinging parties.  Wife not so much.  Once you get older and more experienced you may understand.  I'd explain it to you but since you seem satisfied with the clichéd answer - what would be the purpose?  

 

 

 

[KC 71]

In a nutshell - 2 words - yes dear(yes teelak)


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[KC 71]

I've lived here for 20 years and beyond TEFL teachers or backpackers I've never seen it.  I've never seen a large group of couples where both Thai partners could speak English well enough to discuss politics.  Of course I mostly associate with business people and engineers.  Thailand has almost no political education in college so it is not surprising that the talk would center around work, weather and food.  

Me and my wife talk,mind you she is 4 yrs older than me
So i think it helps,we try and keep a distance from politics though !


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[thaibeachlovers]

On ‎6‎/‎13‎/‎2019 at 10:01 PM, marcusarelus said:

If I wanted a person who was compatible I'd have married a horny old guy who liked watching naked people prance around.  

 

Compatibility has nothing to do with marriage. 

The only thing important in a marriage is if the couple likes each other and are friends.

The lust always fades, and if there is nothing beyond sex the marriage is doomed. 50% failure rate in the west. If a car company made cars that had a 50% failure rate it wouldn't be in business long. Marriage is the definition of hope over actual experience.

[mvsaraburi]

far more than sex/looks by a long shot.

 

had two thai relationships:

 

1. A Thai woman living in Morley, Leeds of all places.  she looks good when dolled up to the nines in tight-fitting clothes, but she had the personality of a block of wood and within a week had 'married me off' so she could in her words 'live off rich farang and not work at my Spa any more' (I am IT contractor, hardly 'rich')

 

2. Wife from Saraburi.  amazing woman, full of passion, energy and wit, doesn't need to get made up, dress sexily, totter around acting all coy to get me going.  no surprises i married her.

[dode57k]

On 5/31/2019 at 8:32 AM, Essex Reject said:

My advice is don't ask for advice on a forum full of the worlds most boring, sensible people, or you could end up like them!

Or indeed full of some of the most inane, childish people who troll these threads looking for opportunities to ridicule or trash serious questions.

ps. not referring to you sir but you know what I mean

 

To the OP...find the right Thai woman and your life will be heaven, find the wrong one and like any other country, misery awaits. My wife had no children and a job when I met her. She knows I've not got wealth and is quite happy. I let her do her thing re household chores, cooking etc. (no choice really) She's happy, I'm happy.

[Damrongsak]

Our 41st anniversary is coming up in October.  Every year I have to remind her  ... usually a week later, 555. 

 

I was a Peace Corps Volunteer recently out of college and had no money.  She had no particular desire to come to the USA.  We made it work. Choose wisely and roll with the punches.  Communication was often difficult, even though I spoke some Thai and she later learned fairly good English.  But communicating subtleties was a chore.  Perhaps it was more the respective mindsets and background. 

 

Wedding day 1978 ...

 

 

Still a happy couple in 2019.  (Well, it was at a Memorial Day ceremony and our oldest son was killed in Iraq.)

 

  This one: 

 

Anyway, marriage isn't always a walk in the park and the cross-cultural aspect can severely try one's patience. Jai Yen Yen. 

[80sboy]

18 years for my wife and I, we married at 20, she spoke fluently in Italian so it was pretty easy to communicate. Our marriage has been an excellent we have both learned about a different culture and embraced our differences. We have two boys, my wife is a great mother, an excellent baker, and a humble and respectful daughter in law for my parents. Find a partner of a similar level of thought/education/social standing, perhaps a simple woman who doesn't aspire to the material things that many Thai people seem to be consumed with. Be smart and have a pre nup just to be sure if you are older and independently financially established.

[Essex Reject]

7 hours ago, dode57k said:

Or indeed full of some of the most inane, childish people who troll these threads looking for opportunities to ridicule or trash serious questions.

ps. not referring to you sir but you know what I mean

 

To the OP...find the right Thai woman and your life will be heaven, find the wrong one and like any other country, misery awaits. My wife had no children and a job when I met her. She knows I've not got wealth and is quite happy. I let her do her thing re household chores, cooking etc. (no choice really) She's happy, I'm happy.

You call this a 'serious question' Lol. I assume you are a very serious person.

[Captain 776]

Get one your age.

NOT from a bar...EVER

If she ever mentions giving her XXXXX.XX BHAT / month.....dump her!

 

[marcusarelus]

26 minutes ago, Captain 776 said:

Get one your age.

NOT from a bar...EVER

If she ever mentions giving her XXXXX.XX BHAT / month.....dump her!

 

You sound like a man with experience.  How many young wives have you had from a bar?  I'm sure you wouldn't be passing on just hearsay gossip.  Nice to hear from an honest man with experience.   

[paulbrow]

I'm going on 23 years, so I guess that's a new record. Snippits of advice.... FWIW, if the woman you're considering marrying needs money every other day, for services rendered or family or, or, or... she's not the one to marry. Most Thai women worth marrying are tighter with your money than you are. She's building a future and no one, not even family will get that from her. My wife has been great and I truly do feel extremely lucky to have found her. She spoke no English and my Thai was limited at best. We learned from each other and now do very well. Had two American wives previously (no, not at the same time) and as far as I'm concerned a good , loyal Thai wife cannot be beat!

Edited June 25, 2019 by paulbrow
more thoughts

[paulbrow]

11 hours ago, Damrongsak said:

Our 41st anniversary is coming up in October.  Every year I have to remind her  ... usually a week later, 555. 

 

I was a Peace Corps Volunteer recently out of college and had no money.  She had no particular desire to come to the USA.  We made it work. Choose wisely and roll with the punches.  Communication was often difficult, even though I spoke some Thai and she later learned fairly good English.  But communicating subtleties was a chore.  Perhaps it was more the respective mindsets and background. 

 

Wedding day 1978 ...

 

 

Still a happy couple in 2019.  (Well, it was at a Memorial Day ceremony and our oldest son was killed in Iraq.)

 

  This one: 

 

Anyway, marriage isn't always a walk in the park and the cross-cultural aspect can severely try one's patience. Jai Yen Yen. 

Congratulations!! And my condolences...

Edited June 25, 2019 by paulbrow
thoughts

[dode57k]

6 hours ago, Essex Reject said:

You call this a 'serious question' Lol. I assume you are a very serious person.

“While you judge me by my outward appearance I am silently doing the same to you, even though there's a ninety-percent chance that in both cases our assumptions are wrong.”  

 

One of my favourite quotes. So relevant in todays society. Have a nice day.

[paulbrow]

On 6/11/2019 at 5:24 PM, Thongkorn said:

Dont buy rent 

I love it!!

[Essex Reject]

2 minutes ago, dode57k said:

“While you judge me by my outward appearance I am silently doing the same to you, even though there's a ninety-percent chance that in both cases our assumptions are wrong.”  

 

One of my favourite quotes. So relevant in todays society. Have a nice day.

Why go off topic? The point is is this a serious debate?

 

Have a nice day yourself too. Thank you.

[paulbrow]

On 6/3/2019 at 2:20 PM, totally thaied up said:

The older you get, the less of importance it is. To me, like this afternoon, I watched my wife and my mother engage in a conversation about death. My Grandmother died a very slow death. My wife spoke about the Buddhist principles of death and of the funerals in depth. To watch the connection my elderly mother and my wife had, was to me priceless. I still get plenty of sex but realistically, I prefer a good meal, close conversation with her and time with my family. And yes, you can get all of this from a Thai if you choose carefully. Sex is not that important. Like I said, if you are compatible it all comes together.

Amen.

[spidermike007]

Make sure you know her really, really well before you get married. That means taking your time. A year or two, or even six years before committing. If it is good, it is only going to get better. If there are issues, they are going to reveal themselves over time. Alot of women push the timetable. Push back. Man up. 

 

Once married? Learn to communicate with her, when there are issues. Many Thais do not like to communicate, as they find it difficult, painful, and not fun! Many Thai women are not well developed emotionally. All the more reason to communicate, so make sure she develops an understanding of the importance of working out your problems.

 

Learn which family members are worthy, and which are not, and do not help or lend money to those that are not worthy of your trust. 

 

If her english skills are poor, send her to a good school to learn. Mine became nearly fluent in a couple of years. Reading, writing and speaking. It has made a world of difference and helped us to develop a great relationship. Been together over a decade now.

 

Do not hesitate to be in control. Most Thai women appreciate a strong man, and one who takes charge. All ships need a captain. Be the submissive man you may have been back home, and you are looking for a world of hurt. 

 

 

Edited June 25, 2019 by spidermike007

[473geo]

2 minutes ago, Essex Reject said:

Why go off topic? The point is is this a serious debate?

 

Have a nice day yourself too. Thank you.

Surely judging people by appearance, for example Thai ladies perception of farang men, would be very much on topic?

My advice treat your wife and her family with the respect and consideration you yourself would appreciate

[Essex Reject]

5 minutes ago, 473geo said:

Surely judging people by appearance, for example Thai ladies perception of farang men, would be very much on topic?

My advice treat your wife and her family with the respect and consideration you yourself would appreciate

Take advice from a weirdo on here? I'll pass thanks. Btw, I have no clue what you are prattling on about anyway, read back..

[473geo]

2 minutes ago, Essex Reject said:

 I have no clue

Agreed ????

[Damrongsak]

9 hours ago, spidermike007 said:

...If her english skills are poor, send her to a good school to learn. Mine became nearly fluent in a couple of years. Reading, writing and speaking. ...

Mine did pretty well.  She managed to get a high school equivalency diploma and took several classes at a community college in the USA.  She eventually published a book of homespun philosophy in English.

 

I was the editor/proof reader. ????  She says in the introduction "...Since I'm not a native English speaker, I thank my husband ______ for helping correct my spelling and grammar.  Although it has driven near divorce many times, we made it." 

[elliss]

On 5/31/2019 at 1:33 PM, petermik said:

Be lucky AND never spend more money than you can afford to walk away from if necessary

 

 Sound  advice,   make sure,you have adequate funds , to walk away .

   Golden rule ...

[thaibeachlovers]

On ‎6‎/‎25‎/‎2019 at 7:19 PM, 473geo said:

Agreed ????

Forum rules. Read the last sentence.

16) You will not make changes to quoted material from other members posts, except for purposes of shortening the quoted post. This cannot be done in such a manner that it alters the context of the original post.

[473geo]

7 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

 

make changes to quoted post for purposes of shortening the quoted post

ok thanks

[dode57k]

19 hours ago, 473geo said:

ok thanks

????????????

[Yinn]

On 5/31/2019 at 3:36 PM, 4MyEgo said:

It's the roll of the dice, married mine 12 years ago, met her in a bar in Phuket of all places, yes she was a "bar girl", a "prostitute", a "whore", 

What you mum, dad, brother, sister, kid, friend, think about that?

 

[CharlieH]

1 hour ago, Yinn said:

What you mum, dad, brother, sister, kid, friend, think about that?

 

Diamonds and Gold and other precious things  are found as rocks in the dirt, they don't remain that way in the right hands.