Don't make that classic mistake.

[4MyEgo]

3 minutes ago, Traubert said:

Yep, you can't rely on women, but herpes will never abandon you.

 

Hello old friend, really good to see you once again, hello old friend....

Come to think of it, did you sleep with my wife between 2005-2006 in Phuket ?

Edited February 6, 2020 by 4MyEgo

[Matzzon]

1 hour ago, tonray said:

'Fourty Bar Fines and seven years ago, my buddies introduced me to Pattaya"

40 bar fines in 7 years! You don´t have much fun, do you?

[Liverpudlian]

Great click bait title ey ! certainly beats Lady chatterly's lover.

[Denim]

1 hour ago, ChipButty said:

The worst I ever got was Crabs after 20 years in Thailand

 

Hope you learnt a lesson. Never pick up freelances working from the fishing pier.

[Old Croc]

2 minutes ago, Liverpudlian said:

Great click bait title ey ! certainly beats Lady chatterly's lover.

Lady Chatterly's Lover - click bait??!!

[transam]

4 hours ago, tonray said:

Is there a short version ?

 

[tinca tinca]

4 hours ago, tonray said:

Is there a short version ?

i felt it was like reading a BOOK !!

[Liverpudlian]

2 hours ago, Old Croc said:

Lady Chatterly's Lover - click bait??!!

Back in the day it raised hell and banned, but for me it was willy tossing off fodder if you get my drift .

[fhickson]

 

5 hours ago, tonray said:

Is there a short version ?

yes, immaturity.

[Aussiepeter]

ChipButty's comment reminded me of that old BBC show "Porridge" starring the late Ronnie Barker. His character 'Fletcher' is being examined by the prison doctor who asks "ever had crabs ?" - Fletcher replies "nah, don't like seafood". 

[FalangJaiDee]

Happens to the best of us

[kilslug]

6 hours ago, 4MyEgo said:

Dude, don't take this the wrong way, but from reading your novel, I have come to the conclusion that you feel duped.

 

She is a massage girl, it is a paying job, she sees many customers and services their needs for payment and they, "the customers" are glad to pay for the service, why are you so angry ?

 

Yes she probably did sleep around with others, how else is she supposed to survive, you know income, something we all need, i.e. unless you were sending her money to survive on, but I doubt that as you come across from your novel as a cheap Charlie, just saying, after all you stayed at her apartment second time around.

 

As for the clap, yes you would be more exposed to it by sleeping with a girl working in a massage or bar girl environment, roll of the dice really, you could get herpes and be the carrier for decades without knowing you had it until it becomes fully blown while having infected many others in the process.

 

Ok, so she gave you the clap, your cured, I think at the end of the day, she escaped your jealous and possessive nature, much to her benefit, albeit she maybe looking for a better life, but with jealousy and possessiveness comes jail, no thanks.

 

Not everyone ends up in your situation, it's a numbers game, for example, I and many, many, many others here have married bar girls, massage girls and remain very happily in love decades later, other have gone to the wayside for a number of reasons which I would need to right a novel on, but it appears I am going down that path now, so I will wind it up.

 

It basically comes down to the luck of the draw and personalities, my wife of 13 years, worked as a bar girl when we met, it didn't bother me in the least, in fact just the other day I asked her about her customers, we speak openly, it was part of her life, no shame, it's just sex, and I used to take girls home after a night out in the old country after buying them drinks or out for dinner, here it's a little different, the girls don't have the opportunities that girls back in our countries have, so they have to do what they have to do, doesn't make them bad, although yes it does expose them to guys with the clap, who will infect them and then they will then infect us if they don't know they have it, me for one, I ended up with good old herpes, he visits me 4 times a year, which means she also has gets a visit from him too, don't know which one of us got him first as I never saw him before, as she claims as well, but at the end of the day, it's not a blame game, it's about understanding that sh-t happens.

 

If your looking to get into a relationship with a Thai "working" girl, do a little more research and perhaps make your next novel a cracker, inspiring all of us happy chappies ????

 

She said she wanted a serious relationship and wanted me not to cheat on her. Ok fine she’s a working girl so you need to take those things with a grain of salt but a lie is still a lie at the end of the day. You are in the wrong for excusing this and I wasn’t cheap with her either. I know the customs over there. I paid for all the meals on the second Holliday and good amount of other things too. 

[4MyEgo]

1 hour ago, kilslug said:

She said she wanted a serious relationship and wanted me not to cheat on her. Ok fine she’s a working girl so you need to take those things with a grain of salt but a lie is still a lie at the end of the day. You are in the wrong for excusing this and I wasn’t cheap with her either. I know the customs over there. I paid for all the meals on the second Holliday and good amount of other things too. 

There are no wrongs or rights, however if she lied to you and you know that 110% for sure, then I agree, the relationship would be doomed sooner or later as the foundations for relationships cannot be built on lies, not to be confused with loss of face. That said, it would be better to be lied to before the relationship went any further and you being streetwise enough to pick it up early, so you can deal with the pain without any financial loss later in life and the struggle of being away from your kids, happens daily.

 

When entering any relationship, you have to work out boundaries and let your (future) partner know what you will and what won't tolerate, e.g. I told my wife that if she ever lied to me that I would end the relationship without thinking twice as I did my previous relationship, I told her what happened then, and how quickly I walked out the door, that said, I told her that she could come to me with anything, and I would deal with it, as opposed to later finding out that I was lied too as I wouldn't tolerate the rug being pulled from under my feet, fortunately for her, she had a similar experience, so she understood where I was coming from, albeit it she had to walk away from that relationship with twins, one under each arm.

 

The way I see it with these girls is they don't know who is real and who is not, farangs come and farangs go, similar with the Thai girls, they come and they go, so they have to play the game, albeit I am sure they don't want to be in the environment they are in, at the same time, they don't know much about farangs except what they see from them here, so it's all a learning curve when two cultures try to become one, that said, I am not suggesting you try and get back together, but to perhaps look at all angles as mind boggling as it is, that is, if you think she is worth it, perhaps see if she would like to back to your homeland for a while as a tourist and see how you get on, e.g. no distractions, she will be where you want her and go from there.

 

Didn't mean to offend you calling you a cheap Charlie, sometimes the limited information makes one read into things a little different, e.g. I was going to stay at a hotel but she suggested I stay with her to save on the money, would have made sense to me, and providing her with some of the savings, or all, depending on your financial circumstances.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[BRUFC]

9 hours ago, kilslug said:

LOL. Some guys might get back together with a girl who gave them an STD but that's a deal breaker for me. 

Yep, I agree. Problem was that the 'girl' was my wife (English, in England)...but I was gone, with my two young daughters!

[OneMoreFarang]

10 hours ago, kilslug said:

I was a newbie to Thailand and I made the classic mistake many first time visitors to the country make. Dating a massage girl. Actually it's more typical to date a bar girl. I don't know of many massage girl stories but I assume they're out there too. I mainly just want to put this story out for educational purposes. I know plenty of people who have been visiting or living in Thailand for a long time will see this as preaching to the choir but It keeps happening to people so I think there's good reason to share these stories so others don't make the same mistakes.

I was on holiday in Phuket on the way to find a gym. Already had been hassled by quite a few massage girls and had ignored all of them. I didn't actually know that almost every massage parlor in Thailand is a front for prostitution but given how much attention these girls were giving me I figured that out pretty quickly. One girl caught my eye because she was very attractive. She also took a much less pushy approach and spoke extremely good English. She was just less in my face and had a softer demeanor somehow. She asked if I wanted a massage for 200 baht. I said I didn't want a massage and was just looking for a gym.  She said that was totally fine and asked for my phone to show me where to go on google maps. We sat down in the shop veranda. She put her head on my shoulder played with my phone for a few minutes and showed me where to go. I thanked her and and then went to the gym for a workout session.  On the way back I passed her shop again and she shouted my name to get my attention. I ignored her and kept walking. She shouted a second time and I decided I was being rude so I crossed the street to see her. She walked up to me and asked If I would like to go out with her and her friend to a Buffet. I didn't really have an all positive feeling about going out to dinner with a prostitute and her friend but she did appear to have a nice temperament and she was very good looking so I didn't want to say no. 

I'll skip over a lot of the details here but after our first date I found I enjoyed spending time with her and we spent two weeks together in Phuket doing various things. She had to work a lot of the time so sometimes I would meet her after midnight to take her out to a club and then back to my hotel. I had to pay the shop if i wanted to take her out early. Probably a scam of some kind and she was keeping that money for herself. I can't imagine farrang taking massage girls out of the parlor on dates isn't worked into the system somehow. It's probably like the commission system for bar girls and the number of drinks you buy them. I refused to pay one night and had an argument with her about it telling her I thought it was just another form of prostitution. She started crying when I said this so I backed off and decided I didn't want the drama. I apologized to her even though I wasn't the least bit sorry and knew there was some form of finical exploitation going on. 

She always took me to the same club. Sometimes I would pay and sometimes she would pay. In reality I don't think she paid anything. Seemed like she knew everyone at the club extremely well and had some kind of arrangement with them. She brings them in customers and the gets free access I imagine. There was also this spin the wheel game that she would play and win at every single night which I imagine was some underhanded way she would get paid. I'm just guessing. No idea how she and the club set these things up but there was some obvious underhanded deals going on. I was getting sex affection and a lot of attention from a good looking girl so none of this bothered me all that much. She was also a single mother with two children and claimed that both partners had cheated on her which was a story I was very skeptical of but thought "Yeah ok, maybe."

She asked me If I wanted to be her boyfriend towards the end of the holiday. I had put every suspicious thing that had happened at the back of my mind and was feeling very addicted and affectionate towards her. I added her as my girlfriend on Facebook kissed her goodbye and headed home. I told her I had a great time with and said I would like to plan another holiday with her in a couple of months.  She texted and video chatted me everyday. Didn't mind at all because I liked the attention. Assured me she wasn't cheating on me and I could trust her. Many things happened during that time that made me suspect she was cheating and I couldn't trust her. For one thing she would always say her phone was about to run out of battery and she needed to charge it and I wouldn't hear from her until the next day. She would video chat me from the female toilets in the club that we would visit together. She would take frequent toilet breaks with me while we were playing pool. This is why I knew that there was a good chance there was guy in the club with that she was with. Why didn't I confront her about this? Because why would I? Nobody who cheats tells the truth about it. 

I go to see her a second time and stay at her apartment. This is where the nail in the coffin happens. A few days into the holiday I catch what can only be the clap from her. All the symptoms to a tea. I had not been having sex with anyone else during those two months away from her so It was definitely from her. We were in Pattaya at the time and after an argument she takes us to a near by clinic which was clearly the worst clinic ever because they took my urine sample in a pint glass. We both got tested and I know she got a nurse to lie to me about her test results because I asked the doctor at the clinic about her results on our second appointment and he gave me a very different story. I asked her to go to the hospital a few days later to get another test and some better medicine and she refused claiming her period had just started and she couldn't get examined. Fortunately I did convince her to take me and I got some better medicine than the <deleted> the clinic had prescribed me. She later went to private hospital to pick up some antibiotics. (Go figure)

I kind of just pretended I was stupider than I was (which you can guess is pretty stupid by reading this story) and convinced her I believed she didn't cheat on me and I still wanted to be in a relationship with her even though I didn't at this point. I would have had to of payed a lot of money to fly home early so I decided I would stick it out with her until my departure date. We were still having some fun and seeing some nice places and I knew I would miss her after breaking up with her so why not make the most of it I thought. Wasn't like I totally hated her at all. I was just very disappointed. Since these suspicions had been building up in my mind a while I wasn't completely surprised when it happened. I felt angry at her for sure but I also felt a fair bit of pity. You could argue I was the idiot and victim in this situation but she's having sex with multiple tourists a month, catching STD's from them and believing these games she is playing are somehow bringing her closer to her goals of achieving a more prosperous life is delusional. There are plenty of men who are ahead of the game and will chew girls like this up and spit them out. You couldn't trust her to hold on to a worthy investment to save her life. To wrap up this story she never admitted to cheating or giving me the STD. She did briefly when I put her under a lot of stress and pressure but would always resort back to claiming innocence later. She broke up with me and tried to get back together about a week later. I told her I didn't want to. 

Do you really expect anybody reads all that, newbie?

[CharlieH]

3 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Do you really expect anybody reads all that, newbie?

Yep ! I have to ...????

[madmen]

What ever happened to easing into the forum with a question like where is the cheapest beer 

Edited February 6, 2020 by madmen

[tifino]

9 hours ago, potless said:

The one thing tat bothers me is H.I.V. I dont want that again.

again?? ????  

[BritManToo]

2 hours ago, kilslug said:

She said she wanted a serious relationship and wanted me not to cheat on her. Ok fine she’s a working girl so you need to take those things with a grain of salt but a lie is still a lie at the end of the day. You are in the wrong for excusing this and I wasn’t cheap with her either. I know the customs over there. I paid for all the meals on the second Holliday and good amount of other things too. 

 ....... and 1,000bht a bang?

[kilslug]

15 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Do you really expect anybody reads all that, newbie?

I expect people to do whatever the <deleted> they want mate. 

[White Christmas13]

[ukrules]

10 hours ago, kilslug said:

they took my urine sample in a pint glass

Never heard of that before ????

[kilslug]

8 hours ago, Denim said:

 

Hope you learnt a lesson. Never pick up freelances working from the fishing pier.

I learned don't worry. 

[kilslug]

1 hour ago, 4MyEgo said:

There are no wrongs or rights, however if she lied to you and you know that 110% for sure, then I agree, the relationship would be doomed sooner or later as the foundations for relationships cannot be built on lies, not to be confused with loss of face. That said, it would be better to be lied to before the relationship went any further and you being streetwise enough to pick it up early, so you can deal with the pain without any financial loss later in life and the struggle of being away from your kids, happens daily.

 

When entering any relationship, you have to work out boundaries and let your (future) partner know what you will and what won't tolerate, e.g. I told my wife that if she ever lied to me that I would end the relationship without thinking twice as I did my previous relationship, I told her what happened then, and how quickly I walked out the door, that said, I told her that she could come to me with anything, and I would deal with it, as opposed to later finding out that I was lied too as I wouldn't tolerate the rug being pulled from under my feet, fortunately for her, she had a similar experience, so she understood where I was coming from, albeit it she had to walk away from that relationship with twins, one under each arm.

 

The way I see it with these girls is they don't know who is real and who is not, farangs come and farangs go, similar with the Thai girls, they come and they go, so they have to play the game, albeit I am sure they don't want to be in the environment they are in, at the same time, they don't know much about farangs except what they see from them here, so it's all a learning curve when two cultures try to become one, that said, I am not suggesting you try and get back together, but to perhaps look at all angles as mind boggling as it is, that is, if you think she is worth it, perhaps see if she would like to back to your homeland for a while as a tourist and see how you get on, e.g. no distractions, she will be where you want her and go from there.

 

Didn't mean to offend you calling you a cheap Charlie, sometimes the limited information makes one read into things a little different, e.g. I was going to stay at a hotel but she suggested I stay with her to save on the money, would have made sense to me, and providing her with some of the savings, or all, depending on your financial circumstances.

 

 

 

 

 

 

People preach moral subjectivity because they think they're being intellectual or something. Nobody believes in that. Lots of bad things go on in Thailand including older men paying for sex with underage boys. If you can't say certain things should not be done then you're just not in touch with your own humanity. I would agree that most people need to morally justify doing bad things but that doesn't in of itself make it good. There's lots of things people do for their families. Richard Kuklinski murdered innocent people for his family and in many ways he was a victim with no choice. Doesn't make it any less evil. Not saying this woman was evil of course. Far from it but I'm not going to spin this to make myself look like the bad man because apart from not walking away earlier I really did nothing wrong. She told me not to cheat and take the relationship seriously. I did. I understood it was a given that she would be having sex with customers in the massage parlor and I didn't demand her to stop or anything like that. I said if she expected me not to see other girls when I go home to my country then I expect her not to go out on dates with customers she liked from the massage parlor and bareback them in their hotel rooms. I held up my end of the bargain and she didn't hold up hers. Very naively I'll admit. You can say it's all for their family but it really isn't. A lot of it just comes to seeking as much upward mobility for themselves as possible. They can choose to latch onto one sincere guy and receive a decent income for themselves and their family or they can risk it with multiple men and end up making more money or less. It's a personal choice but if someone lie's and manipulate people then the consequences are their own responsibility. Plenty of guys wouldn't care and would just keep this girl as <deleted> buddy and turn the game on them but I get no satisfaction out of that. I understand where you're coming from with taking her out of Thailand to a place where there are less distractions but if a girl starts monkey branching in the beginning I really don't see why there would be any end to it. You either have honor or you don't. Soldiers kill for a living and prostitutes bang for a living. If you can't seperate your work from your personal life in either of these professions you're a massive liability. 

Edited February 6, 2020 by kilslug

[BritManToo]

29 minutes ago, kilslug said:

I held up my end of the bargain and she didn't hold up hers.

.... if a girl starts monkey branching ........

Women never hold up their end of any agreement.

Best not to enter into agreements with them, then they can't accuse you of letting them down.

 

You do understand Roosh's male supremacist/PUA speeches are just nonsense? 

Once he hit the wall, age 40 no more free ones no matter what his skills, he gave it all up and found religion.

Edited February 6, 2020 by BritManToo

[4MyEgo]

29 minutes ago, kilslug said:

She told me not to cheat and take the relationship seriously. I did. I understood it was a given that she would be having sex with customers in the massage parlor and I didn't demand her to stop or anything like that. I said if she expected me not to see other girls when I go home to my country then I expect her not to go out on dates with customers she liked from the massage parlor and bareback them in their hotel rooms. I held up my end of the bargain and she didn't hold up hers.

End of story.

[kilslug]

9 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Women never hold up their end of any agreement.

Best not to enter into agreements with them, then they can't accuse you of letting them down.

 

You do understand Roosh's male supremacist/PUA speeches are just nonsense? 

Yeah I don't buy into PUA. It's largely BS. I'm not sure what you mean by a male supremacist though. You mean like the fact men are stronger than woman and invented most of the things we have and you're not allowed to say that anymore? 

[Logosone]

She also took a much less pushy approach and spoke extremely good English

 

Man, that was your first clue.

 

99% of Thai women who speak extremely good English have dated a ton of foreighers.

 

Whenever you see a Thai woman who speaks very good English, assume automatically she's been servicing Farangs for cash.

[BritManToo]

58 minutes ago, Logosone said:

She also took a much less pushy approach and spoke extremely good English

Man, that was your first clue.

99% of Thai women who speak extremely good English have dated a ton of foreighers.

Whenever you see a Thai woman who speaks very good English, assume automatically she's been servicing Farangs for cash.

My Thai daughter is the 1%, 22 years old, Native English speaker, never been on a date.

She would never speak with a foreign guy (or any other guy for that matter) socially.

[kilslug]

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

My Thai daughter is the 1%, 22 years old, Native English speaker, never been on a date.

She would never speak with a foreign guy (or any other guy for that matter) socially.

LOL. Good one. There are some fathers who are really like that too.