and let me tell you, a straightjacket in solitary aint no fun.

It's not exactly a barrel of laughs with an audience I would expect

I dunno about that, depends on who's in the straight jacket.

Good Luck

Moss

Now , lads and lassies.

This is an appeal from somebody who is trying to be a "better person".

I am making a serious effort to get my percentage of idiotic off-topic

smart-arse posts down to single figures (at least out in the real world).

I would ask you therefore to look twice at your words out there before

clicking the do-it button.

I know it is not fair to pick on an individual but

"Housemates are generally speaking safer, cos you have to share your home life, and it goes both ways. "

had a least six inane reponses , all involving sexual innuendo , going through my tiny mind

before I got the ponty arrow thing up to the right hand corner to close the window.

Thank you for your comprehension.

Whatever you wish to dream about matey... Ain't my cuppa, but each to their own...

Who was it, by the way...

Whatever you wish to dream about matey... Ain't my cuppa, but each to their own...

Who was it, by the way...

Would'nt dream of telling.

Might cause embarrasment.

:D

PS Just to reassure , I'm not a sexual deviant , I just have a very twisted sense of humour.

Just another burden......

Okay. I HAVE to post the following. I didn't know where to do it, and I didn't feel it warrented its own thread, so I'm adding it to this topic/less thread.

Firstly, the background>

There I was, watching a new series of Have I got news for you, just now, (jeremy Paxman guest host / v. funny) and one of the images taken from the news was of a man - well... Just take a look.

SO of course, google beckoned.

A snapshot of the results.

Link underneath the snapshots. This is incredible.

Incredible

This is why gooogle is so good!

Sure boys, go ogle some more. Those rabbits are nuclear waste experiments.

Sure boys, go ogle some more. Those rabbits are nuclear waste experiments.

Actually the thing that put me off foods like rabbit (and crab) was that there

just wasn't enough nourishment involved compared to the work involved and

the debris left behind.

Some of those little hoppers though look like you could do them on a big spit.

So what if you glow a bit in the dark afterwards.

That reduces your chances of being run down by a car.

So what if you glow a bit in the dark afterwards.

That reduces your chances of being run down by a car.

But it does increase your chance of being the main story of National Geographic.

Come in number 9 your time is up.

But sir, we've only got 8 boats!

Number 6, are you in trouble?

Come in number 9 your time is up.

But sir, we've only got 8 boats!

Number 6, are you in trouble?

A classic!!!

Yep, there is a boating lake near where I grew up and every time we passed it as kids

that joke would always get told and it was always funny, brilliant.

I don't get it.

The Duck's Off.

Yeah, sing the song, Bro'

If the sun refuse to shine,

I don't mind, I don't mind,

If the mountains fell in the sea,

let it be, it ain't me.

Alright, 'cos I got my own world to look through,

And I ain't gonna copy you.

Now if 6 turned out to be 9,

I don't mind, I don't mind,

Alright, if all the hippies cut off all their hair,

I don't care, I don't care.

Dig, 'cos I got my own world to live through

And I ain't gonna copy you.

White collared conservative flashing down the street,

Pointing their plastic finger at me.

They're hoping soon my kind will drop and die,

But I'm gonna wave my freak flag high, high.

Wave on, wave on

Fall mountains, just don't fall on me

Go ahead on Mr. Business man, you can't dress like me.

Sing on Brother, play on drummer..

Do you get it now Jet? uh? huh? Can you dig it!?

The Duck's Off.

there's no need for that kind of language, it was only a joke for ducks sake!

The Duck's Off.

there's no need for that kind of language, it was only a joke for ducks sake!

It's NOt COOKED you ignoramus!!

So, the 6 turned out to be 9, but you said there were only 8 boats, Robski, so does that mean Jimi was dead and floating in the water when he sang that song and so then, from his perspective, the 6 would be a 9 because he was looking at it upside down like?

I know it must be difficult for you like, so here's another clue for you like.

You got me runnin' goin' out of my mind,

You got me thinkin' that I'm wastin' my time.

Don't bring me down,no no no no no,

I'll tell you once more before I get off the floor

Don't bring me down.

You wanna stay out with your fancy friends.

I'm tellin' you it's go to be the end,

Don't bring me down,no no no no no no no no,

I'll tell you once more before I get off the floor

Don't bring me down.

Don't bring me down,grroosss

Don't bring me down,grroosss

Don't bring me down,grroosss

Don't bring me down.

What happend to the girl I used to known,

You let your mind out somewhere down the road,

Don't bring me down,no no no no no,

I'll tell you once more before I get off the floor

Don't bring me down.

You're always talkin' 'bout your crazy nights,

One of these days you're gonna get it right.

Don't bring me down,no no no no no,

I'll tell you once more before I get off the floor

Don't bring me down.

Don't bring me down,grroosss

Don't bring me down,grroosss

Don't bring me down,grroosss

Don't bring me down.

You're lookin' good just like a snake in the grass,

One of these days you're gonna break your glass.

Don't bring me down,no no no no no no no no,

I'll tell you once more before I get off the floor

Don't bring me down.

You got me shakin' got me runnin' away

You get me crawlin' up to you everyday,

Don't bring me down,no no no no no,

I'll tell you once more before I get off the floor

Don't bring me down

Don't bring me down,no no no no no no no no,

You missed off the "ooo eee oooo"

Brave attempt though

Nice try, but I'll think you'll find it's 'no no no no no-o oo woo hoo.'

That is like so cool

I like a man that does his homework .... wimmen too

Electric Light Orchestra's, "Don't Bring Me Down"

Misheard Lyrics:

Don't bring me down, grrross!

Original Lyrics:

Don't bring me down, grrroosss!

Jim Grieve adds: "Yes, 'Grroosss' is the actual word (taken straight off the lyric sheet). Jeff Lynne says it's just a word he made up. Although Mack (the German engineer who worked on this album) noted that it sounded kind of like the German word for 'good morning'('guten Morgen'). Most folks think it sounds like they're singing 'Bruce'. For that reason, when the song is performed these days, Jeff will sing 'Bruce' instead.

Someone posted in the main forum a few weeks back about Jimi of the Hendrix clan, some people thought he was gay because he sang "excuse me..... while I kiss this guy"

Mistakes happen...... as the Dalek said climbing off the dustbin

I am a loser (as John Lennon said).

I've never won anything, except one time.

In 1990, or so, I was living with my girlfriend in London and we decided to go to some concerts - she'd buy a couple of stadium and arena tickets , and I'd do the same. So we went to Gloria Estefan and Madonna, then my choices; we went to the rolling stones and ELO. But the ELO tickets were on hold at one place so I applied for a competition to win more... and I won

- I was a winner!.

Thus I went with my girlfriend and my parents to Wembley Arena to see ELO (2).

Amazing.

blah blah blah

Misheard Lyrics:

Don't bring me down, grrross!

Original Lyrics:

Don't bring me down, grrroosss!

Jim Grieve adds: "Yes, 'Grroosss' is the actual word (taken straight off the lyric sheet). Jeff Lynne says it's just a word he made up.

blah blah blah blah

Doing your homework Thaddy?

Anorak, anorak, anorak!

Anorak, anorak, anorak!

String vest

Panty girdle

Pastel shell suit

Wincyette pyjamas

Sorry but I just noticed this thread and I assumed it is about the latest super-cool

trends in clothing.

Anorak, anorak, anorak!

String vest

Panty girdle

Pastel shell suit

Wincyette pyjamas

Sorry but I just noticed this thread and I assumed it is about the latest super-cool

trends in clothing.

Could be, could be!

Panty girdle? For guys?

blah blah blah

Misheard Lyrics:

Don't bring me down, grrross!

Original Lyrics:

Don't bring me down, grrroosss!

Jim Grieve adds: "Yes, 'Grroosss' is the actual word (taken straight off the lyric sheet). Jeff Lynne says it's just a word he made up.

blah blah blah blah

Doing your homework Thaddy?

Hey .... I just copy and paste (that's original) .... if I had to proof read everything...... well, if we all did, you wouldn't have anyone to talk to ')