Genuine friendships in Thailand.

[Yinn]

1 hour ago, luckyluke said:

 

Friendship has often a price here. 

 

If have price, is not real freind.

if must pay for freind, or girlfreind is pitiful, and not real.

Edited April 20, 2020 by Yinn

[19DL86]

10 hours ago, Yinn said:

Sad you must pay. 

Try dating. Free

It's not sad, well not for me.  After all that's what prostitutes are there for.  It's like saying it's sad I use a car wash, or a gardener or whatever.  The poor Esaan Thai girls family and local economy would suffer. As its doing so very much now.

 

What makes you think I want to sit and wine and dine, go to the cinema or such like with a Thai woman?  Who to be honest can barely conduct a conversation above child of 12 in the West.  When all I want is gratuitous sex.  Plus the cost would be far greater.

 

It seems you know very very little of your compatriots even the women Yinn.

[FritsSikkink]

6 hours ago, Liverpoolfan said:

One final point I would like to make since you brought it up, Yinn.

 

like it or not, English is the official global language of the world (67 countries have it as their official spoken language.) Based on those figures, would you not consider it prudent for Thais to learn the dominant global language to a good level?

 

Perhaps then their lives would improve quite a bit and we could all converse and get to know each other well.

 

Not being able to speak English in todays global world is a severe handicap imo. Nobody speaks Thai outside of Thailand and the fact that you are using the point of foreigners not speaking Thai for their lack of Thai friends is rather self defeating.  
 

Thais should be learning to speak English like the rest of the world but the current evidence all around me suggests that they are not doing so for whatever reason. 

There we go again with the "everybody needs to speak English attitude", Chinese is spoken a lot more than English. Learn the local language when you decide to live here. You don't have an empire anymore, so lose the "we rule the world" thing and adept to the country you want to live in or get out. Which you said you would do about a week ago. Bye bye.

Edited April 20, 2020 by FritsSikkink

[seajae]

42 minutes ago, Yinn said:

* yes, useful for me. Same learn Thai useful for you live in Thailand.

* yes, and encourage TVF member learn Thai same. (But sensitive issue, some people) 

 

i enjoy the posts from the guys can speak Thai. They have high knowledge, intersting the most for me. They also not complain so much. 

The guys who lazy to learn Thai feel frustration a lot IMO. And difficult have the freind. Lonely.

actually Yinn I have tried to learn thai for several years but have a major memory problem so no matter how hard I try I cannot converse with thais but that does not stop me from having thai friends, we find ways to communicate or my wife translates. Being around thais while they all converse in thai doesnt bother me at all, I have done several trips in busses(wifes work/govt organized) with all the rest being thai and its been great, your attitude and facial expressions tend to let others know what you are thinking. While I find many of the thais we associate with want to or try to speak english the ones that generally dont are those that have the idea that it is inferior. Language is only a barrier if you let it be so, genuine people work through it as I & our thai friends have been doing for several years 

[19DL86]

You have a valid point, albeit it's misplaced and out on context in this case.  As I didn't think for a moment Liverpoolfan or anyone has made references the those days of Empire.  When Great Britain gave the then civilized World, under its governance including North America the English language.

 

Many years later the United States had a vote on whether the national language be Spanish or English, the vote was in favour of the latter.  

 

Otherwise I am sure that Spanish would be the global language of shipping, commerce, air traffic, computers and those multi national organizations like UN, NATO, WHO and UNESCO?  This is more to do with America's dominance and influence that the British.

 

It's interesting too the EU will soon have to adopt a new medium of communication.

10 hours ago, FritsSikkink said:

There we go again with the "everybody needs to speak English attitude", Chinese is spoken a lot more than English. Learn the local language when you decide to live here. You don't have an empire anymore, so lose the "we rule the world" thing and adept to the country you want to live in or get out. Which you said you would do about a week ago. Bye bye.

 

However and nonetheless the level of spoken English here in Thailand is dire, amongst the worst in the developed World. A very simple indication of the poor education and the Governments lack of foresight and desires to move from the 19th Century. 

[FritsSikkink]

8 minutes ago, 19DL86 said:

A very simple indication of the poor education and the Governments lack of foresight and desires to move from the 19th Century. 

Have you ever been in Bangkok and seen the infrastructure / development? They are in some parts far ahead of Western countries. Can you send money to someone at an ATM in your country, do you have traffic light indicators how long it takes for the lights to be green. Have that here for more than a decade. Have you seen the department stores filled with top brands of the world? Get real you are living in a "has been society". 

[19DL86]

5 minutes ago, FritsSikkink said:

Have you ever been in Bangkok and seen the infrastructure / development? They are in some parts far ahead of Western countries. Can you send money to someone at an ATM in your country, do you have traffic light indicators how long it takes for the lights to be green. Have that here for more than a decade. Have you seen the department stores filled with top brands of the world? Get real you are living in a "has been society". 

Utterly lost the point, skipped from languages to infrastructure. Are you a woman by any chance? Did you read all my comments?

 

To answer your question, yes I have been to Bangkok, possibly 10-20 years before you.

Edited April 20, 2020 by 19DL86

[daveAustin]

Feel sorry for the chaps that don't have any Thai friends. You should try to join a group - running, cycling, tiddlywinks, whatever - and learn to speak, or at least have an interest in, the language and people.

[FritsSikkink]

12 minutes ago, 19DL86 said:

To answer your question, yes I have been to Bangkok, possibly 10-20 years before you.

I was here in 1981, what about you?

[19DL86]

4 minutes ago, FritsSikkink said:

I was here in 1981, what about you?

Beat me '89 when I was 28 years old.

So would you care to respond to the initial topic of my reply, this being the poor ability of Thais in general not in BKK alone to speak the English language 

[luckyluke]

7 hours ago, Yinn said:

yes, useful for me. Same learn Thai useful for you live in Thailand.

* yes, and encourage TVF member learn Thai same.

Different, not same-same.

 

Knowing English is useful in many countries. 

Knowing Thai is useful in Thailand. 

 

Thai youth should all learn English, it would give them more possibilities, in their own country, and worlwide. 

 

Knowing the local language of the place where one is staying facilitate the daily life. 

 

Young foreign people working here usually know the language, or are learning it. 

 

However many long stayers in Thailand are aged people. 

 

With the age come also the less possibilities of memorising; and the less intentions of doing efforts. 

 

Pretty sure you already know all this. 

 

 

 

[brokenbone]

well, why would anyone want to hang around with you anyway

lest its financially beneficiary ?

do you at least practice any profession or hobby in thailand

that gives any practical cause to stick around ?

[luckyluke]

6 hours ago, Yinn said:

Sad you must pay. 

Try dating. Free

Dating is relatively free, it usually cost you a meal/movie/drinks.

 

You may even want to impress her by taking her to a fancy/expensive place.

 

But only your date know/decide how the evening will end. 

 

When paying, you choose if you want to go for a drink, a meal, movie or whatever.

 

You don't have to go to fancy expensive places if you don't want to.

 

You can hold her hand or not, you decide. 

 

And you both know how the evening will end. 

 

So not really that sad. 

 

[luckyluke]

7 hours ago, Yinn said:

If have price, is not real freind.

if must pay for freind, or girlfreind is pitiful, and not real.

 

Many Thais are ready to do a lot for money, even pretending to be your friend and acting accordingly.

 

Sometimes one only find out, too late, that the friendship was not a really one. 

 

It can happens everywhere, but Thais are people who easely can hide their real intentions. 

 

Smiling for Thais has not always the same significance usually non-Thais are giving to it. 

 

 

[Colabamumbai]

I agree. After 10 years have some Thai teacher friends but not more. First visit in 1972.

[JRG23]

Been living in Thailand for more than 20 years. 

My only Thai friend is my wife.

I know plenty of Thais, but I'm afraid I wouldn't call any of them my friend. 

 

Edited April 20, 2020 by JRG23

[scorecard]

"...All males I meet are here for 2 things only. Girls and booze. "

 

Is this revealing that you need to expand your horizons?

 

I don't know where you live and that's not really my business.

 

I lived in Pattaya for several years (to be close to a good international school for my son) when I worked on a project in the Eastern seaboard. I came across a number of farang (not through visiting bars) who I would never allow in my house for several reasons, just one reason is that I didn't want my son or my Thai wife (a doctor of medicine) to be exposed to these guys and their vile mouths and attitudes. 

 

That said, yes of course there's plenty of decent farang around, and Thailand is much more than the bar sois of Pattaya and Phuket. . 

 

As said above, perhaps you need to expand your horizons. 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited April 21, 2020 by scorecard

[nobodysfriend]

Get yourself a dog .

[19DL86]

Yes to the comment above, it is by large true. But not only of here or the Eastern Seaboard area. Most guys myself included are a bit rough in their tone or language used, especially us Brits and Aussies.  Whom make up the largest part of the demographics.

But to be fair Thailand has always attracted this kind of foreigner, once with open arms, many criminals relocated here when Spain began to ask a few too many difficult questions.  

Thailand is/was internationally known for the sex drugs party lifestyle, ease of visas/money laundering due to state corruption, cheap and lax.  Hardly surprising it doesn't have the same long term expats as The Caymans, Bahamas or such.

[VocalNeal]

9 hours ago, 19DL86 said:

Many years later the United States had a vote on whether the national language be Spanish or English, the vote was in favour of the latter.  

 

I believe you will find the alternative was German, not Spanish.

[19DL86]

This was told me sometime ago by an American friend, that it was Spanish.  Seemed to make sense, or too might French.

Ah yes I see the " Muhlenburg Legend" as its referred to. But only as an "Urban Legend".  Why on earth German? - as they have no colonial influence or empire in the Americas.  Prior to 1930s not a great deal anywhere.

This should have been a sign for their later grandiose intentions.

[Yinn]

4 hours ago, luckyluke said:

Different, not same-same.

 

Knowing English is useful in many countries. 

Knowing Thai is useful in Thailand. 

 

Thai youth should all learn English, it would give them more possibilities, in their own country, and worlwide. 

 

Knowing the local language of the place where one is staying facilitate the daily life. 

 

Young foreign people working here usually know the language, or are learning it. 

 

However many long stayers in Thailand are aged people. 

 

With the age come also the less possibilities of memorising; and the less intentions of doing efforts. 

 

Pretty sure you already know all this. 

 

 

 

This op about guy with no freind. 

I recomend he learn Thai. He answer that all thai should english!!!

 

i give example of @villagefarang 

i am thai, I more interest be freind someone like that, be interesting, than the  guy lazy to learn Thai, say every Thai should learn English and complain. Is true.

 

He not want to listen. up to him.

[nobodysfriend]

Just to be honest :

Isn't it the same story with friends everywhere ?

It is always and everywhere difficult to find a real friend . And it takes years to really know each other well ...

People do not trust each other anymore ( rightful so ) . Everyone thinks that the other one wants to profit only or even rip you off .

That goes for male or female .

I think Thai people can be a lot of fun , especially when you speak a little Thai . but real friends who try to help you when you're in trouble ...? No , but that is the same everywhere . Only elsewhere it is even less fun ...

If you want a real friend , get yourself a ( soi ) dog , save it's life , take care for it , it will love and protect you forever .

 

 

[transam]

9 minutes ago, Yinn said:

This op about guy with no freind. 

I recomend he learn Thai. He answer that all thai should english!!!

 

i give example of @villagefarang 

i am thai, I more interest be freind someone like that, be interesting, than the  guy lazy to learn Thai, say every Thai should learn English and complain. Is true.

 

He not want to listen. up to him.

The thread is not about a guy with no friends..Read the title again.......????

[WineOh]

14 minutes ago, Yinn said:

like that, be interesting, than the  guy lazy to learn Thai, say every Thai should learn English and complain. Is true.

What makes you so sure I cannot speak Thai, Yinn?

 

not very wise to rush to conclusions when you dont even know me ????

[keithkarmann]

Yes it is very difficult to make good friends in Thailand but it is not easy in any Country. It is more difficult as you get older as you become less tolerant of other peoples stupidity. I was lucky when I came to Thailand in 2011 after the death of my English wife. I met the most beautiful Thai girl and although it did not work with her, through her I met a guy about 10 years older than me from Liverpool. He was married to my girls sister. My relationship with the girl ended after about a year but my frienship turned into one of the best friends I have ever had and lasted about six years until he died exactly two years ago. I am now almost 69 years old and I do not expect another best friend relationship to happen like that.

[Kurtf]

23 hours ago, Ventenio said:

Let me give you a few examples of how NOT to make friends when you WANT friends.

 

1.  insult them 

2.  insult their country (a big one)

3.  insult Thailand

4.  complain about life

5.  share too much too soon

6.  have very strong opinions, matter-of-fact

 

i've met sooo many losers who are desperate for friends but immediately disrespect everyone.  luckily it happens soon into the relationship.  

 

of course, IF they insult (xxx) after you insult (xxx) then you are both losers and will be good friends.  lol.  coming to Thailand to be negative is very funny to me, but i avoid these people.  

 

 

Yeah by all means do not have very strong opinions. Be wishy washy about how you really feel. Those are the kinds of people that you want to get close to. Those are the kinds of people you want to associate with because you know you can really really depend on them. If you really think Thai drivers are some of the worst in the world, just say they are wonderful and no worse than those in other countries. If you think a military dictatorship is not good for a country, just say how lucky Thai people are to have such a strong government. Personally I can do quite well without friends like that thank you very much.

 

[BritManToo]

11 minutes ago, Liverpoolfan said:

What makes you so sure I cannot speak Thai, .....

not very wise to rush to conclusions when you dont even know me ????

I've never found any Thais worth making friends with, no point in learning Thai, it just wasted my time.

A greedy, superficial and poorly educated bunch, even the degree holders would have had problems graduating high school in the west.

 

Sure, spend 5 years learning Thai so you can speak with a prudish (newly unemployed) hotel receptionist who thinks a 'hello kitty' themed bedroom, piled high with soft toys, and posting photos of her dinner on Facebook are the height of sophistication.

 

Edited April 21, 2020 by BritManToo

[WineOh]

1 minute ago, BritManToo said:

I've never found any Thais worth making friends with, no point in learning Thai, it just wasted my time.

A greedy, superficial and poorly educated bunch, even the degree holders would have had problems graduating high school in the west.

 

Too true mate. 
Glued to their iphones every waking second of the day.

wouldnt want to distract them from Tik Tok with a bit of intellectual conversation. 

 

[nobodysfriend]

11 minutes ago, Liverpoolfan said:

Too true mate. 
Glued to their iphones every waking second of the day.

wouldnt want to distract them from Tik Tok with a bit of intellectual conversation. 

 

But that is true for farang as well ...

The thing is that most active members of this forum are older white men , who still remember the good times they had when they were young ... but the times have changed , the world has changed . Keep up with that .

Be young in your heart , laugh as much as possible , don't take things too serious and do not get involved in something that will bring trouble to you ... some short time friends will come ( and later go ... ? ) , if you behave like that .

But , at least , you had some fun ...