Wife always getting angry and short tempered..

[rumak]

3 hours ago, kenk24 said:

OMG! THat means there is a 50% chance I will have to stay with her?

or, could it be that you stay with her about 50% of the time ?   

[jadee]

In my experience, almost all women I've ever known have behaved pretty much as the OP described at some point, maybe not all the time, and to varying degrees, but what I'm saying is it's VERY typical. Personality, hormones, stuff like that. Someone once said, 'don't try to understand women, women understand other women and they hate each other'. 
The only people who this seems to surprise are some men, but I think if they are honest, when they think back to how other women they've lived with have behaved (sisters, mom, family members etc) it's par for course. 
Just save money and assets in your home country and hunker down until the kids are 18, then have 'the talk'. 

[BritManToo]

Just now, jadee said:

n my experience, almost all women I've ever known have behaved pretty much as the OP described at some point, maybe not all the time, and to varying degrees, but what I'm saying is it's VERY typical.

After they're 40 years old, it becomes permanent for most women.

Which is a good reason to only interact with women in their 20s and early 30s.

[rumak]

8 hours ago, Logosone said:

And it's sad that women become so unattractive as they approach 40, and is a terrible cross we men have to bear as we struggle to find the right decision, do we stay by a deteriorating cantakerous, difficult and selfish 40 year old

i enjoyed your post...... seems like some of us have had similar experiences.   Many guys just stay

with what they have.  I guess they have their excuses reasons .   

As i move up through the ages............. i am realistic and my prey  attention to age moves up accordingly,

Soon i will be 100 and i guess I will be searching for matches in the 80 year old range   555555555

 

Ok, so what is possible for the "older man"  that is looking for a decent 40 yr old lady ?  I think quite 

a few possibilities,  but not the sex goddesses of our youth.   There are some nice and fairly fit ladies

out there.  Get in shape,  learn the language,  and talk nice.   Simple ?   

 

My 40 plus significant other likes the outdoors,  never talks nasty ( that is my domain),  and is not

a big PITA ( very important  55 ).   Also holding up pretty well as she wants to keep me .

Here is a pic for Sunday AM  .   Her sister is the one on the right,  if anyone is interested

[Pilotman]

8 hours ago, riclag said:

 I'm a guy what do I know about such things . I have heard of the HRT thing though .I liked to get a women's opinion on that! 

Its called 'google'.  It is quite accessible.  You should try it some time. 

[sipi]

Me and my missus have hardly spoken in 15 years.

I wish I met her 40 years ago.

[worgeordie]

1 hour ago, rumak said:

Well,  we all (should) know how skilled these ladies are at turning the situation around to where

you are in the wrong .     Not saying that the man is always perfect,  but for generalizations...... i have

found that the "effort level" of the female slowly goes downhill.   Luckily i have a bus ticket waiting

for them about halfway before they reach the bottom   ????

 "effort level" of the female slowly goes downhill" Please explain ?

regards Worgeordie

[ehs818]

Maybe she's entering menopause? My ex turned out to be bipolar and that resulted in dramatic mood swings. My choice was to exit the marriage. Only found out about the diagnosis years after the fact. But if you've tried talking about it with her and let her know that you are about at the end of your rope, maybe it's time to cash in your chips. Whatever it costs, your sanity is well worth it. I'm decidedly single forever because of my experience. If you want sex, you can get it easy here. If you want companionship and intellectual conversations, hang out with your foreign buddies! Good luck my friend...

[Logosone]

10 hours ago, CorpusChristie said:

Seems to be quite a common occurrence on these forums , some guys proudly posting that they are unfaithful to their wife , happy ending massages and everything ,  short times .............then wonder why their wifes dont like em anymore 

Infidelity happens, of course. It need not be a dealbreaker. It all depends what the man brings to the table. Think of Usain Bolt, he is openly unfaithful to his woman yet she agrees to have his child and stays by his side. Think of Sean Connery's wife, who accepts Connery cheated on her. Think of Jefri Bolkiah, who had 3 wives when 40 women all vied to be his 4th wife, knowing, he constantly had sex with a rotating roster of 40 women.

 

Now of course, we don't own countries, 20 billion USD, and are not celebrities. If a woman loves us she will stay with us. Of course the bitterness at betrayal changes things, changes the relationship and may ultimately break it. It depends on who you are I suspect.

Edited July 19, 2020 by Logosone

[CorpusChristie]

2 minutes ago, Logosone said:

Infidelity happens, of course. It need not be a dealbreaker. It all depends what the man brings to the table. Think of Usain Bolt, he is openly unfaitful to his woman yet she agrees to have his child and stays by his side. Think of Sean Connery's wife, who accepts Connery cheated on her. Think of Jefri Bolkiah, who had 3 wives when 40 women all vied to be his 4th wife, knowing, he constantly had sex with a rotating roster of 40 women.

 

Know of course, we don't own countries, 20 billion USD, and are not celebrities. If a woman loves us she will stay with us. Of course the bitterness at betrayal changes things, changes the relationship and may ultimately break it. It depends on who you are I suspect.

But different to John in Thailand on a modest pension, who met Lek in a bar and got married to her and now goes back to a bar regularly to bang all the newer hostesses whilst Lek sits at home 

[Logosone]

1 hour ago, rumak said:

i enjoyed your post...... seems like some of us have had similar experiences.   Many guys just stay

with what they have.  I guess they have their excuses reasons .   

As i move up through the ages............. i am realistic and my prey  attention to age moves up accordingly,

Soon i will be 100 and i guess I will be searching for matches in the 80 year old range   555555555

 

Ok, so what is possible for the "older man"  that is looking for a decent 40 yr old lady ?  I think quite 

a few possibilities,  but not the sex goddesses of our youth.   There are some nice and fairly fit ladies

out there.  Get in shape,  learn the language,  and talk nice.   Simple ?   

 

My 40 plus significant other likes the outdoors,  never talks nasty ( that is my domain),  and is not

a big PITA ( very important  55 ).   Also holding up pretty well as she wants to keep me .

Here is a pic for Sunday AM  .   Her sister is the one on the right,  if anyone is interested

 

A lot of us have the same experience, we find a beautiful young woman aged 19. You have wonderful years together. Then she insists on having children. Then all the lack of sleep, the crying and screaming and constant work of child rearing tear up the very fabric of the woman you used to know. Her slim, tight, young body becomes a little wider, the face a little wrinklier. But the worst is the character change. The children for the first time teach her to be boss. And Boss Woman will not go away, every now and then she rears her ugly head in her interactions with you. Selfishness, short temperedness, sarcasm suddenly appear. Obviously the desire for sex and sexual experimentation disappear to a large extent as the poor woman is exhausted from child rearing.

 

It's a horrible, horrible experience. The woman is still a fine woman in many ways, loyal, good cook, still has sex (though now less givingly and less well), still runs the house, does the laundry...but is that really enough. When you have a Mia Noi on the side and know what charm, what fun life could really be like?

 

But of course that young beautiful Mia Noi will herself turn into a selfish, less attractive, difficult woman who wants children. What can a man do?

 

Unless, my friend, you are lucky. Unless you found that perennial smiling woman, who being Asian, ages much later and she is smart enough to keep you happy. I hope you found that exception.

[Eindhoven]

Try helping her to feel better about herself. It's an uphill battle, but see how it goes. Even if you don't think that she deserves it. Bite that tongue. Take her some flowers. Change the film you are in, from a horror to a romance. Women don't want reality, they like fantasy. Tell her you love her ears, her nose.... whatever. Turn her anger into a smile by disarming her.

Don't think about being equitable or reasonable. Just give her a fantasy for a while. Compliments etc

Suck it up for a while. See how it goes. It's definitely worth it if it stops the disruption to all of your lives..

[1FinickyOne]

1 hour ago, rumak said:

or, could it be that you stay with her about 50% of the time ?   

20% lately... though we did have 2 full months in Q. together... just the two of us mostly... went ok..

[Pungdo]

Join the club, pretty much the same scenario, my wife is in her mid 40's and I suspect that she is going through Menopause, she goes off like a cheap Chinese fire cracker over absolutely nothing.

[1FinickyOne]

11 minutes ago, Logosone said:

But of course that young beautiful Mia Noi

The difference between a wife and mia noy... 

 

When you pick up a heavy package at home and hurt your back, your wife gets angry because you should know better by now, - when you tell the mia noy, she sympathetically moans, ohhh my poor darling... 

[LukKrueng]

just upgrade to a newer model

[kwak250]

I wonder how many of you can relate to this?

Sometimes everything is going really great and it seems like they want to get angry about something and argue about something so trivial .

Almost as though they feel guilty being happy

I sometimes am having a great holiday somewhere and say the food or room is really nice and out of nowhere she goes crazy .

Ah well I have learnt what to say over the years and that's nothing .

I still reckon all the thai tv with all the drama queens and crying doesn't help.

 

 

[1FinickyOne]

29 minutes ago, ehs818 said:

I'm decidedly single forever because of my experience. If you want sex, you can get it easy here. If you want companionship and intellectual conversations, hang out with your foreign buddies! Good luck my friend...

This is all good and logical... but, in addition, isn't it a bit sad to get old alone? 

 

And don't old guys living alone get a bit disconnected and grumpy and difficult... ?? I have sure noticed this among several of my friends as maybe the first touches of dementia approach... 

 

 

[ChaiyaTH]

Classic stuff, they always look at what can be better etc but do nothing for it themselves. Yet they will complain and whine.

I figured it works best to do 10 times worse than what she did, leave regulary for a few days and be sure to remind her who the boss is. Else she will be.

 

Since I behave more like that, she behaves perfect most times. In Rome do as the Romans do. And if that doesn't help it is better to find a new one. I hear it all the time though, bar girl or rich and educated, same drama. Same cheating games and all the rest. As soon kid or marry = 5% success rate for long run.

Edited July 19, 2020 by ChaiyaTH

[1FinickyOne]

4 minutes ago, kwak250 said:

t seems like they want to get angry about something

my wife was never like that before, but it started a bit just as you describe when menopause arrived...

[KarenBravo]

So many leashes handed to so many women (sigh).

Nobody can make you do what you don't want to do.

Don't like the way things turned out? Then leave.

Can't leave because of children? Tough luck! You were the one that built the bars for your own cage. Live with the consequences.

[BritManToo]

Just now, KarenBravo said:

So many leashes handed to so many women (sigh).

Nobody can make you do what you don't want to do.

Don't like the way things turned out? Then leave.

Can't leave because of children? Tough luck! You were the one that built the bars for your own cage. Live with the consequences.

I quite like my kids, but not enough to live the rest of my life in misery.

I come first now .......... that probably makes me a bad man, but I've never claimed to be good or even nice.

As far as I can see total sh$#s often appear to live happier and more satisfying lives than those that pretend to be nice or good.

[ChaiyaTH]

5 minutes ago, KarenBravo said:

So many leashes handed to so many women (sigh).

Typical dumb reply here, proves the point. What did you expect to read Woman, we are talking about wives. They have the website Oprah for you to lash on guys.

Edited July 19, 2020 by ChaiyaTH

[ChaiyaTH]

16 minutes ago, kenk24 said:

And don't old guys living alone get a bit disconnected and grumpy and difficult... ?? I have sure noticed this among several of my friends as maybe the first touches of dementia approach... 

That is more the result of them not taking care of themselves. Doing nothing for a decade and drinking surely helps dementia.
Same for socialising. Just many lost souls in TH. For the average conversation with intellect Thais are not suitable too.

Edited July 19, 2020 by ChaiyaTH

[Kadilo]

25 minutes ago, kenk24 said:

This is all good and logical... but, in addition, isn't it a bit sad to get old alone? 

 

And don't old guys living alone get a bit disconnected and grumpy and difficult... ?? I have sure noticed this among several of my friends as maybe the first touches of dementia approach... 

 

 

What’s sad is to put up with all the <deleted> that many on here seem to think is normal by finding excuses for their behavior all because they are scared of being alone. 
 

In many  cases they left their home countries tp get away from the very same but now for some inexplicable reason they want to find a way to stay  with an abusive other half. 
 

Of course it could be that they left their home country and previous relationship because they are  the one that had the issues, and now it’s repeating itself in Thaiand because in reality nothings changed only the country. And/Or that they have dug themself a massive hole because they thought having kids would somehow change their world and it has to the extent that are now emotionally tied into a relationship for the wrong reasons and too weak/scared to leave them.  
 

As others have said you have to be in a situation where you can get up and leave as soon as the warning signals begin because you only get one life and as we all know “time flies by........but you are the pilot” 

 

 

 

Edited July 19, 2020 by Kadilo

[ChaiyaTH]

8 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I quite like my kids, but not enough to live the rest of my life in misery.

I come first now .......... that probably makes me a bad man, but I've never claimed to be good or even nice.

As far as I can see total sh$#s often appear to live happier and more satisfying lives than those that pretend to be nice or good.

You did the right thing but most people dp not. They rather make themself a mess and cause the rest of family to suffer a lifetime.

[KarenBravo]

7 minutes ago, ChaiyaTH said:

Typical dumb reply here, proves the point. What did you expect to read Woman, we are talking about wives. They have the website Oprah for you to lash on guys.

In other words.......your wife is holding yours and you don't know the Magic Word.

[ChaiyaTH]

9 minutes ago, KarenBravo said:

In other words.......your wife is holding yours and you don't know the Magic Word.

Holding yours? What are you even talking about. This is why guys only conversations exist, you can't think rational clearly.

[Eindhoven]

Come on guys, you are supposed to be helping the OP, not arguing with each other. 

If by a slight adjustment, the OP can bring peace into his life, that doesn't mean that he is giving up his manhood. On the contrary, it means that he has added another string to his bow. 

He is in control. No different from those first dates when you want to make a good impression. You don't think of it of losing your manhood, but of being a hunter. So how is it different to modify your behaviour in order to get what you ultimately want...peace?

So choosing to stay and keep your family together should be the utmost priority, until you have exhausted every avenue. If it proves not possible, then make plans. But until then, smart moves make a man. He doesn't need to use his fists in every battle.

Better to use your brain.

[Kadilo]

2 minutes ago, Eindhoven said:

 

Better to use your brain.

If he used his brain this would be the last place to come for relationship advice.