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Age Gap Relationships... in the Later Years? (Opinions/Experiences Sought)


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10 hours ago, LaosLover said:

But the younger they are, the less likely they are to be interested -or be impressed with your knowledge of- old Thai folkloric stuff or MoLam oldies.

Hookers seem to prefer Latino music, can't go wrong playing Maluma/Enrique/BeckyG

More respectable young ladies (my step-daughter) are happy to sing along to Takatan/Gratae/Ja

You need to fit the music to your audience.

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38 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

More respectable young ladies (my step-daughter) are happy to sing along to Takatan/Gratae/Ja

Would she marry someone twenty years older than her?  How would you/your family react if she started to date someone twenty years older than her?  Case-by-case, or would you/her parents have an absolute rule?

 

(Obviously I'm just asking for purposes of the discussion.)

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2 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

She has shown no interest in men at all (23 years old now).

Do you know why this is?  It seems that while many Thai women are extremely interested in men, some seem to not want much to do with them, despite apparently being heterosexual.  Is it something about the reputation that Thai men have, or how girls are expected to behave in relationships in Thailand?  Or do some girls feel they need to be respectable, chaste, etc.?  Kind of old fashioned?

 

As much as we hear "a Thai would date any Thai man over a foreign man", there seems to be a subsection of Thai women who perhaps avoid men/Thai men due to how they treat women. ????‍♂️

 

2 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Can't say I'm bothered what she does or with whom.

What about her parents?  Do they share your approach?

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12 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

No parents apart from me, dad was in jail for 25 years shortly after conception, she's never met him, mom abandoned her all her life

I guess that could have had some effect. Even more so if she was completely alone. I hope she has a happy and successful life.

 

12 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

after leaving her with grandma in the village age 0-11, then with me from then to end of university (last year).

A very interesting situation.

 

Do you mind if I ask how this came about? You just sort of claimed her? No legal procedures? How did the locals react? How did your wife feel about it?

 

And you didn't get anything in return?

 

12 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

She did offer to give me a percentage of her wage, as I'd paid for everything, but I said I didn't need it. Lovely girl, but no longer my responsibility, I brought her up to be a strong independent woman, and she sure is ....... job done!

Wow. That's highly commendable. She's very lucky to have had you in her life. I dread to think how she would have otherwise turned out.

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2 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

Do you mind if I ask how this came about? You just sort of claimed her? No legal procedures? How did the locals react? How did your wife feel about it?

 

And you didn't get anything in return?

Married her mom, mom asked for money to send to village for her.

I said no, but I'd be OK with her living with us.

Mom moved on, left her (and our son) with me.

New gf moves in.

 

Normal life in Thailand as far as I can see.

Locals and schoolteachers thought I was nice (or possibly gay) to look after without expecting 'favours' in return.

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13 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Married her mom, mom asked for money to send to village for her.

I said no, but I'd be OK with her living with us.

Mom moved on, left her (and our son) with me.

New gf moves in.

Ah, so real step-daughter. Understand. Probably best for both children also.

 

13 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Normal life in Thailand as far as I can see.

Locals and schoolteachers thought I was nice (or possibly gay) to look after without expecting 'favours' in return.

I think that says more about Thai people than it does about you. And I bet in the Thai way the "favours" would start before the girl was 18.

 

That's a great thing you did. It certainly adds another aspect to your character that might not come across in your other comments. It's a shame the Thai government doesn't show a little more appreciation to all the foreigners that finance many of their children.

 

Thank you for explaining all that. :thumbsup:

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1 hour ago, BangkokReady said:

Do you know why this is?  It seems that while many Thai women are extremely interested in men, some seem to not want much to do with them, despite apparently being heterosexual.  Is it something about the reputation that Thai men have, or how girls are expected to behave in relationships in Thailand?  Or do some girls feel they need to be respectable, chaste, etc.?  Kind of old fashioned?

 

As much as we hear "a Thai would date any Thai man over a foreign man", there seems to be a subsection of Thai women who perhaps avoid men/Thai men due to how they treat women. ????‍♂️

 

What about her parents?  Do they share your approach?

She saw what her mom ended up with 5555

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18 minutes ago, CrunchWrapSupreme said:

1) "God...why?" As in, I could've done "better".

2) Smiles, nods, looks of approval. As in, they realize there's more to this relationship than the superficial.

I would guess that kind of depends where their values lie regarding choice of partner.

 

1 thinks the most important thing in a partner is looks, 2 thinks there are other things to consider and you must really be in love. (Although both suggest they are thinking that you could do better.)

 

I've had a few very puzzled looks on a couple of occasions where I've been in the company of an older female friend or colleague. One thing is for certain, age-gap relationships between a younger foreign guy and older Thai woman are not the norm.

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26 minutes ago, BangkokReady said:

1 thinks the most important thing in a partner is looks, 2 thinks there are other things to consider and you must really be in love. (Although both suggest they are thinking that you could do better.)

I was once at Ruam Chok market with a couple of old, tall, skinny but muscled cycling pals (late 50s). Two of the market stall ladies (late 30s) were eyeing us, and one said in Thai, 'why can't our husbands look like that' (husbands were short pot bellied 40 somethings snoozing in camp chairs beside them)

Edited by BritManToo
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11 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

'why can't our husbands look like that' (husbands were short pot bellied 40 somethings snoozing in camp chairs beside them)

I guess the answer is, they're too lazy to bother to do the necessary activities to look like that (as they are also apparently too lazy to work). The blame is really on the women, though, for their choice of husband.

 

Sometimes I wonder why any Thai women would want to marry a Thai man based on how they treat them and how they behave. There must be some sort of indoctrination to make Thai women think that this is a good choice, their only choice, or perhaps what they deserve. (Obviously I realise they aren't all like that.)

 

In Vietnam, many women have the attitude of a foreign husband being a better option, as they don't drink as much, nor control, cheat or beat them, while being higher status and wealthier. It seems like some husbands are the same in Thailand, but the mentality of the women is totally different. I wonder if that is part of some sort of deliberate plan. ????

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'Sometimes I wonder why any Thai woman would want to marry a Thai man' 

Did you really write that!!

Children!! the wedding be it village or other is to keep up appearances.

There are a lot of tom boys appearing in our area they hook up with girls with kids, maybe the rural Thai man is not so attractive after all ???? in our area poor choices indeed, after insemination I think not really required.

Its that traditional western idea of love confusing things again ????

 

 

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Years ago I worked in a high earning office in Kings Road London, the office 'relationships' opened my eyes 

A PA was out of reach if not shagging the 20+ years older boss were at it with an alternative director, the young teenage office girls were at it with the 30+ mega earning sales guys, married or not. The whole environment was high spending, often at expensive local restaurants, there was also a company flat available around the corner, just in case one of the directors, sales guys, managers, worked so late they were too tired to make it home ????

I kinda enjoyed the open honesty of Thai women

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52 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I was once at Ruam Chok market with a couple of old, tall, skinny but muscled cycling pals (late 50s). Two of the market stall ladies (late 30s) were eyeing us, and one said in Thai, 'why can't our husbands look like that' (husbands were short pot bellied 40 somethings snoozing in camp chairs beside them)

maybe they were just admiring your friends bicycle pants ........

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Why Florence Pugh And Zach Braff's Huge Age Gap Makes Some Fans Uncomfortable

 

https://www.msn.com/en-us/entertainment/entertainment-celebrity/why-florence-pugh-and-zach-braffs-huge-age-gap-makes-some-fans-uncomfortable/ar-AAW40rl?li=BBnb7Kz

 

And as I stated in an earlier post Al Pacino and his GF  have a 50 year age gap. Guys go for eye candy  , women for money fame, power and lets face it if a guy in US is famous  rock star, actor  he also has money.  The average old farang in Thailand could not get a younger girl say in US, he'snot good looking and doesn't have enough money. But here in Thailand he has much more money than an average Thai guy so can attract poor but  pretty Isan girl. You won't see any Thai Hi-so  girls hanging with a farang unless he is of her status and can bring something to the table. Some older Thai (+40)  Thai women say school teacher/Gov worker may hook up with an average farang because no Thai guy will marry them but the farang will (if he can't get a younger girl or is afraid of trying) I am 74, my wife at 47 is 6 years younger than my daughter in US, so what.   Have known her since 2000, we married later ,have also dated Hi-so Thai girl I met in US . Many blue collar workers belong to Expats club but clik ling below. This is an organization for higher level / well off Thai and expats from all over the world ,has a club in Bangkok  and major cities world wide.

https://www.internations.org/?&utm_source=google_adwords&utm_medium=cpc&utm_term=inter nations&matchtype=p&utm_device=c&utm_content=Group&utm_campaign=Finch_InterNations.org_Country_Brand&gclid=Cj0KCQjw0umSBhDrARIsAH7FCoe-QJjfgETZzWMFoiEDL50l24HoHaVZ15vJzqEcN4we60yCVB7yAVEaAuMaEALw_wcB

 

 

Edited by Tony125
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6 minutes ago, StreetCowboy said:

That's the best photo I've ever seen of him.

It just occurred to me that Boris is actually in an age-gap relationship with his wife.  She is 24 years younger than him.  I very much doubt it's his looks or personality that attracts her to him.

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Dennis Quaid is nearly 40 years older than his graduate student fourth wife, 29, plus more celeb couples with big age gaps

https://www.msn.com/en-us/entertainment/entertainment-celebrity/dennis-quaid-is-nearly-40-years-older-than-his-graduate-student-fourth-wife-29-plus-more-celeb-couples-with-big-age-gaps/ss-BB18GwYg?li=BBnb7Kz

 

Similar to Al Pacino 50 years older than his GF or Nick Cage 31 years older than  his wife. The Thai girl is with you for the security/money you can provide and she may well stay with the older farang as she considers you Jai Dee  = good /warm heart who deserves to be taken care of for all you have done for her and family. Or could be a cold hearted "B"  who has been wronged by other farang or Thai men and just wants to take you for everything she can get.  I have it set up so I am pretty well protected and my money goes into US bank before I transfer over to a Thai bank here.  If I die she gets the assets and a pension. If she crosses me before hand  I can take my money (pension) and cash overseas  and leave.

AAW8MoG.jpg

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43 minutes ago, Tony125 said:

 

AAW8MoG.jpg

This pic shows the problem of discussing age gap relationships in Thailand. Most can see the reason the woman is with this guy is rather similar to why any woman chooses any mate.

Some guys in Thailand have this dynamic going on.

Spend 5 minutes in Thailand and even less on this forum and it's obvious many older men here are not Dennis Quaid.

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1 hour ago, Grecian said:

This pic shows the problem of discussing age gap relationships in Thailand. Most can see the reason the woman is with this guy is rather similar to why any woman chooses any mate.

Some guys in Thailand have this dynamic going on.

Spend 5 minutes in Thailand and even less on this forum and it's obvious many older men here are not Dennis Quaid.

Don't think you read the articles as you don't seem to understand my point which is if you don't look like  Dennis Quaid the only reason a woman in US or Thailand will stay with you is if you have money to support her well. Doesn't have to be a lot like what you would have to have in US to keep a stunner like that but here a good pension/investments, financial holdings can get you a mate. 

 

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True, true, true. Any old billionaire toad can't just buy his way into doing bondage on Jane Birkin.

 

Look at how human gargoyle, Harvey Weinstein, was consistently c-blocked in his pathetic attempts to get Gwyneth Paltrow to take a shower with him. You still need looks and game. Money only gets you graded on a curve.

 

A good example is Ron Perlman of Revlon fame. He had a string of marriages to lookers (including Ellen Barkin). He's at least average or a cut above in looks (for a baldie) and he's a very dynamic person.  

 

Same in Thailand. You need to not have not much of a gut, a bit of gift of gab, and just the right amount of aggression/initiative.

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18 hours ago, Grecian said:

This pic shows the problem of discussing age gap relationships in Thailand. Most can see the reason the woman is with this guy is rather similar to why any woman chooses any mate.

Some guys in Thailand have this dynamic going on.

Spend 5 minutes in Thailand and even less on this forum and it's obvious many older men here are not Dennis Quaid.

Here  do you like this pic better to prove my point?  Anna Nicole Smith  married  J. Howard Marshall a billionaire 60 +  years older than her. Many women don't care what the guy looks like as long as he has money.  In Thailand it will not cost you as much  asi it would in the US or EU.   And yes some of the Thai women will stay with the old gentleman and take care of him as they apreciate what they have been given, some don't care and will leave after they have gotten all they can.

image (1).jpg

smith-marshall-resized.jpg

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2 hours ago, Tony125 said:

Here  do you like this pic better to prove my point?  Anna Nicole Smith  married  J. Howard Marshall a billionaire 60 +  years older than her. Many women don't care what the guy looks like as long as he has money.  In Thailand it will not cost you as much  asi it would in the US or EU.   And yes some of the Thai women will stay with the old gentleman and take care of him as they apreciate what they have been given, some don't care and will leave after they have gotten all they can.

image (1).jpg

smith-marshall-resized.jpg

Yes,I agree with your point.

I'm just adding that some older men have something lovable about them and some really dont. If an age gap relationship starts off transactional over time the woman might actually develop feelings at least approximating love it there is something in the old guy that is lovable. On the other hand, there are plenty of pretty mean spirited old men that this is very unlikely to happen to.

After a couple of years marriage both types of men would have a very different view of women.

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On 4/9/2022 at 12:16 PM, BritManToo said:

2. The women are instantly replaceable, usually with one younger and prettier.

I don't lose much sleep over it but it amazes me that so many Western guys here in Thailand don't seem to realize this. I understand having a scarcity mindset back home but here?

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