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How-To Handle Machiavellian Land-’Lady’...Handling Her? REPUGNANT Thought!!


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My Fellow Subdued and Suppressed Victims of the Landlord Class!

 

What can you do if you encounter a narcissistic Machiavellian & Gaslighting Land’Lady”, and what can you do if you don’t want to move?

 

Are there good tactics you can employ? 

 

Say this person is completely obsessed with winning at all costs, in every negotiation, no matter how minute, even over issues that don’t even rise to the 5-Baht level.

 

And, let’s say this person gets all her satisfaction in life just from getting the upper hand, no matter what the negotiation is about. Maybe she’s just a dried-up person who suddenly realizes that her personality disorder, narcissism, has left her with nothing to show for her long time on planet Earth. And maybe she wonders why, but is ultimately feeling frustrated because she is not introspective enough to arrive at the answer.

 

Of course we do know that the Narcissist is one of the most difficult disorders to treat, simply because the narcissist feels no need to change their behavior, and might even be blind (in rare cases) to this ghastly behavior. 

 

Here are a few examples of a Machiavellian Landlord’s behavior and treatment of tenants:

 

1. Tenants and guests are treated either like zoo animals in China…Or, tenants are no more than widgets to be housed for a fee, similar to household goods stored in commercial storage facilities with those roll-up overhead doors.

2. Landlord makes promises they don’t keep. They will purposely promise something, just to try to be even more manipulative and deceptive.

3. They blame the tenant for problems with the property, when the property is not owned by the tenants.  Who in their right mind would do such a thing? Answer: A landlord not in their right mind.

4. They refuse to make repairs…until pushed to the limit.  Then, after promising to pay for the repairs, they try to go 50-50! Must be a nutcase, right! NO!!! They are just being Machiavellian Nutcases!!!!!

5. They are cold and sometimes abusive to tenants. Maybe not verbally or physically abusive, but they do not care about the welfare of anyone but themselves, and they abuse their tenants' rights in many small ways.

6. If the tenant complains, then the tenants get the…GASLIGHT treatment!!!


 

So then..Let us accept, for argument’s sake, that the tenant is unwilling or unable to easily move out and find a new place:

 

What can be done to counter the Machiavellian Landlord?

 

I refrain from saying “handle” the Land’Lady’, because, in some cases, we have seen landlords which are too old and raggedy to handle…and…Let’s BANISH the THOUGHT of doing so before we all make each other sick to the stomachs!

 

Look, Folks, we KNOW that there must always be a “best strategy” for managing any conceivable situation thrown our way in life.

 

This situation is no different.

 

What are useful suggestions about how you would deal with a landlord like this?

 

DON’T, Please, just say: Move Out! Find another place! This is too obvious, easy, and not the thought experiment under consideration here.

 

In some VERY REAL situations, moving is not possible, or moving must be delayed, or …you name it.  What if one could NOT move.  Then what. How to FIX the Landlord?

 

How to FIX the Landlord!

 

(No illegal tactics will be even considered.)


 

Regards,

Gamma,

(And I am Gamma without my Gamma Rays.)


 

Please Note:  This term, ‘Gaslighting’, is actually NOT a new one, and this term has shown up increasingly in Psychology Literature…

 

BUT, in case you do not wish to read the literature, and I do not blame you for your laziness and refusal, you can just watch one of the first WONDERFUL films that brought Gaslighting to the World’s Stage, meaning to the world’s general awareness.

 

Please ENJOY this great film as you continue to think up the many possible ways to deal with this kind of landlord, a type that would put even that stingy old Rockefeller to shame, with his coin-operated pay phone installed in his house, so that his friends and relatives would not spend even a dime of his money.

 

GASLIGHT, the FILM (only the trailer, and please torrent the film, ASAP):

 

 

 

 

 

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4 minutes ago, GammaGlobulin said:

Then, after promising to pay for the repairs, they try to go 50-50!

Although technically a tenant is never supposed to pay for repairs, how much money is involved? 

 

I once knew someone who was renting. But she rented for years and years.

Eventually, she started to treat the place like her own and actually paid for renovations.

 

Give the place a paint job and pay from your own pockets.

Who cares? You can't take your money with you when you die. 

 

We're never gonna survive unless we get a little crazy. 

 

 

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10 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

Although technically a tenant is never supposed to pay for repairs, how much money is involved? 

 

I once knew someone who was renting. But she rented for years and years.

Eventually, she started to treat the place like her own and actually paid for renovations.

 

Give the place a paint job and pay from your own pockets.

Who cares? You can't take your money with you when you die. 

 

We're never gonna survive unless we get a little crazy. 

 

 

We are speaking about being used, abused, manipulated, and gaslit. 

 

This topic is not about working together with a cooperative and reasonable landlord. 

 

I most definitely agree with your good thinking that it's often in the interest of the tenant to share repair costs, because it builds good will. 

 

But here we're talking about the Machiavellian Narcissist whose ultimate goal is to control in order to get the rush/high of being controlling. 

 

This is a psychiatric and toxic disorder of the mind... 

 

It's not about the repairs, per se. 

 

 

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8 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

maybe you're exaggerating. 

and maybe it's mostly concerns about money and it makes her act out in a strange way.

wait for other responses.

i got nothing else. 

 

What you state, that severe money concerns might lead to similar behavior, in the short term, is logical. 

 

However, if other tenants had independently come to the conclusion that this hypothetical landlord were TOXIC, then we might be dealing with a different animal, altogether. 

 

 

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6 minutes ago, GammaGlobulin said:

However, if other tenants had independently come to the conclusion that this hypothetical landlord were TOXIC

I did have a landlord who was completely crazy once.

Then the only solution is to move out. 

How do you change a crazy person? Force them into Freudian psychoanalysis sessions? 

 

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5 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

I did have a landlord who was completely crazy once.

Then the only solution is to move out. 

How do you change a crazy person? Force them into Freudian psychoanalysis sessions? 

 

That's what seems to have happened with two tenants in our hypothetical landlord case study, not before declaring the landlord TOXIC. 

 

 

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1 minute ago, MrJ2U said:

Buy her some imported chocolates.

 

Probally change her attitude and life will be smoother. 

Not trying to bed or wed her. 

Good suggestion! 

But if flattery doesn't work, why would chocolate? 

 

Besides, with this personality type, there are few things more stimulating and satisfying than exerting control over others. 

 

Some other strategy is required. 

 

Maybe something like trying to become an even more powerful narcissist. 

 

Or, rereading Machiavelli's book, The Prince. 

 

 

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59 minutes ago, richard_smith237 said:

I’d start a thread about it then reply to my own inane nonsense….

 

 

 (apologies, I keep making the mistake of opening your threads without first checking who the author is)….  ????

Please don't apologize. 

 

I figure that, if I keep writing topics, sooner or later, you are bound to inadvertently open one that you will have found unexpectedly entertaing, and valuable. 

 

(My apologies, but, how do you like the grammar construction I used in the above sentence?) 

 

 

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Having neglected to mention the famous book of strategy. Art of War, in the original topic...

Has anyone read Art of War, and is this book useful?

 

image.jpeg.110b6db6cd91dcc5704d1d3700041a81.jpeg

 

Here is a link to a webpage which purports to show how to use Art of War in any negotiation or any business conflict, etc.

 

https://www.expertnegotiator.com/tip/the-art-of-war-and-negotiation/

 

On this site, there are listed 12 "lessons" adapted from Art of War, such as these two:

 

Lesson 5: “Keep him under a strain and wear him down.”

Lesson 11:  Chang Yu: “If the enemy general is obstinate and prone to anger, insult and enrage him so that he will be irritated and confused, and without a plan will recklessly advance against you.”

 

I must admit that I purchased this book decades ago, but never read more than a page or two.

At that time, I didn't understand what all the fuss was about.

 

Has anyone here had any experience using this book, in a useful way, and winning over a Machiavellian Landlord?

 

IMHO:  I think the Chinese can out-Machiavelli Machiavelli, hands down.

 

So, here is a thought:  What about if a tenant were to hire a Chinese guy to deal with the Thai landlord???

 

Who would win?

 

I would like to see THAT happen, anytime soon.

 

 

 

 

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Just now, Hayduke said:

 

Marry her…...it’s the only possible solution.

 

 

Extremely coincidental that you should mention marriage.

It is my belief that a local landlord can be even more controlling than a local wife.

 

And, furthermore, I was mulling over this the other day, and it seems to me that it might be more difficult to divorce one's landlord, than one's wife.

 

Think so?

 

 

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56 minutes ago, Ralf001 said:

I had a landlord once that was real hard work, annoying me basically 24/7.

 

Told the HR manager to rent me another house, he had a new house and my belongings moved with 3 days.

That's because HR managers know what Maslow knew... 

image.png.54b8c1bdbf52be83694479d391020226.png

SHELTER is a BASIC NEED, without which, not much productive work would get done, of course..

HR guys realize this.

Hence, your living accommodation was of paramount importance...

 

 

Edited by GammaGlobulin
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9 minutes ago, Ralf001 said:

What did maslow (who ever that is) know ?

Maslow wrote a lot about his theory of Hierarchy of Needs.

When/If this hierarchy of needs is met, then, in theory, one might eventually reach self-actualization.

I am not quite to the level of self-actualization, but...

I'm getting there.

Just a few more posts, I keep telling myself,

And I, too, will become self-actualized.

 

 

 

 

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23 minutes ago, HandsomeTallFarang said:

Are you drunk 24/7 or something? You write some bizarre ???? and also some cringe ???? like "I'm not quite at that level of "self-actualization" but I'm getting there."

 

Ok, whatever you say Siddhartha.

 

 

Stop hitting the sauce.

Too late, rooted unit for sure.

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If it gets to the point where you realize your landlord is toxic and uncooperative, best thing to do is vacate and move on. If they refuse to refund your deposit, best thing to do is stay an extra month, without paying rent. 

 

Life is too short for bad landlords. Some have "poverty consciousness". It is a horrific condition whereby a person who has wealth, thinks they are poor and it pains them to spend any real money. There are millions that fit that bill. They are likely incurable, without 10,000 hours of therapy, which would never happen here, due to hubris and pride. 

 

I have been fortunate to find a great landlord. She is kind and respectful. She is responsive, she shares in the cost of improvements, or repairs or covers them herself. But, we take great care of the house, and have never been late with rent, which she has never raised. 

 

I would not have any tolerance for a bad landlord. Try to find one who DOES NOT live nearby. 

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