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Burning your bridges.


bob smith

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1 minute ago, bob smith said:

nothing that a trip to the citizens advice and the job center cant cure..

 

if one was so desperate. 

I disagree. They are a service not your friends. 

2006 I got greedy and got heavily invested in Real Estate in FL , 2008 I was financially upside down 

I had a negative worth  and had to go back to work.

I had not burned my bridges, I regularly communicate with my friends and show an interest in their lives. 

When the time came that I needed  help, they also showed an interest in my life.Call were made. It seemed that a contract of a contact of a friend was in need of someone with my skills in NYC, I packed up my bags , moved there, Worked my ass , made myself indispensable, and about 10 years I had made everything back , My house in FL mortgage free, and vested in an additional pension. 

No community service Would have done this for me. What would community services do for me. Give me food stamps and perhaps a welfare apartment where I can plop myself in a used layboy shair and wait to die?  

 Family, friends and contacts are gold. only a full throws away such gold. 

I am going to the States Christmas for two weeks. When I told people I was coming , A car was made available to me and a place to stay in Daytona beach , and in Delray beach, would community's services done this for me?  

 

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3 minutes ago, sirineou said:

I disagree. They are a service not your friends. 

2006 I got greedy and got heavily invested in Real Estate in FL , 2008 I was financially upside down 

I had a negative worth  and had to go back to work.

I had not burned my bridges, I regularly communicate with my friends and show an interest in their lives. 

When the time came that I needed  help, they also showed an interest in my life.Call were made. It seemed that a contract of a contact of a friend was in need of someone with my skills in NYC, I packed up my bags , moved there, Worked my ass , made myself indispensable, and about 10 years I had made everything back , My house in FL mortgage free, and vested in an additional pension. 

No community service Would have done this for me. What would community services do for me. Give me food stamps and perhaps a welfare apartment where I can plop myself in a used layboy shair and wait to die?  

 Family, friends and contacts are gold. only a full throws away such gold. 

I am going to the States Christmas for two weeks. When I told people I was coming , A car was made available to me and a place to stay in Daytona beach , and in Delray beach, would community's services done this for me?  

 

It is different in the UK.

 

No matter how bad it is there (and it is bad) it's nowhere near as bad as it is in the states.

 

The job centre WILL eventually find you a job.

That is what they do.

They are desperate for you to get off benefits and will go out of their way to help you.

Same with citizens advice. They can't house you, but they can tell you everything you need to know about waiting lists, council housing, shared accommodation etc.

 

I have had a decent experience in the past with british social services.

Edited by bob smith
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2 minutes ago, bob smith said:

give you advice on getting back on your feet with housing etc and help you find a job.

 

you american I take it?

 

 

 

   I did mean , like what advice would you expect from C.A and its quite difficult to get a job if you are older and unqualified and haven't worked in years .

   Its not a case of popping in and coming out with a house and a job

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2 minutes ago, bob smith said:

It is different in the UK.

 

No matter how bad it is there (and it is bad) it's nowhere near as bad as it is in the states.

 

The job centre WILL eventually find you a job there.

That is what they do.

They are desperate for you to get off benefits and will go out of their way to help you.

 

I have had a decent experience in the past with british social services.

 

   How long ago was that ?

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27 minutes ago, jerrymahoney said:

Sometimes having ones bridges burnt was not your choice but the other side's.

 

A very definite: Don't call us. We'll call you. if ever.

Then it is not you burning your bridges , it is others who did. And unless these others are sociopaths, don't you think there ight have been a reason why they burned their bridge to you? 

 

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Just now, Nick Carter icp said:

 

   How long ago was that ?

it doesn't matter.

 

Where I come form there are safety nets.

 

I don't need them anyway, this is all hypothetical. I have enough money saved to last me 50 years or so.

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1 minute ago, bob smith said:

It is different in the UK.

 

No matter how bad it is there (and it is bad) it's nowhere near as bad as it is in the states.

 

The job centre WILL eventually find you a job there.

That is what they do.

They are desperate for you to get off benefits and will go out of their way to help you.

 

I have had a decent experience in the past with british social services.

 

The past doesn't count for anything.

 

The current government are keeping the workforce sick by under-investing in the NHS (the "let's fund the NHS" brexit crowd in staggering short supply now), thus keeping the workforce on benefits.

 

They need people claiming benefits because that's yet another group of people to demonize in their ridiculous culture wars.

 

Yes. British social services used to be good. You get no argument from me there.

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2 minutes ago, JayClay said:

thus keeping the workforce on benefits.

oh even better then!

 

does the dole still payout every Thursday like they used to, just in time for the weekend? 😄 

Edited by bob smith
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3 minutes ago, bob smith said:

it doesn't matter.

 

Where I come form there are safety nets.

 

I don't need them anyway, this is all hypothetical. I have enough money saved to last me 50 years or so.

 

   It does matter as things have changed a lot over the years .

What are the safety nets that are there where you come from ?

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18 minutes ago, sirineou said:

Then it is not you burning your bridges , it is others who did. And unless these others are sociopaths, don't you think there ight have been a reason why they burned their bridge to you? 

 

I do know why. But that is their choice. But 'twas not the only choice.

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Just now, jerrymahoney said:

I do know why. But that is their choice. But 'twas not the only choice.

I understand and sympathize. Sorry to dredge up old feeling best left undisturbed. 

I often wake up in a cold sweat over choices that I made in the past.

Even though in retrospect it looks horrible and I ask myself . how could I have possibly made such a choice . I try to remind myself that at the time, given what I knew then and the emotional state I was in.  it seemed like a good choice . 

Something to keep in mind. Burned bridges can sometimes be re-build.  

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On 11/1/2023 at 12:53 PM, Ralf001 said:

 

Speaking off.... You live in Thailand ?

Bob lives in a studio room in the Nirun in Pattaya .

 

Don't know if you have been past the Nirun ,but a lot of shirtless farang outside  with tattoos all ages holding a beer bottle  ...and absolutely nothing wrong with that !🍾

Edited by georgegeorgia
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34 minutes ago, georgegeorgia said:

Bob lives in a studio room in the Nirun in Pattaya .

 

Don't know if you have been past the Nirun ,but a lot of shirtless farang outside  with tattoos all ages holding a beer bottle  ...and absolutely nothing wrong with that !🍾

 

 

Yeah I know Last Stop Condo's.

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6 hours ago, BritManToo said:

This is me, not spoken with my 4 former Brit kids in nearly 15 years.

 

I created another family, they can't create another dad. Their loss!

I just can't imagine that situation, I've 3 kids in Oz. One has Power of Attorney and looks after my interests in Oz. I was discussing the Xmas wine list with her this am. I'd die before burning my bridges. Not judging your position in anyway. Cheers

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Yes, I don't need to keep contact with people I don't share anything with, or people that don't wish to keep the contact.

 

I learned at a mind control course how  easy it is to mentally "cut" connection. You don't need to be rude, just stop interacting. On Facebook for example, just unfollow – you can still be in the "friends list" – then it's easy stop interacting. If the cut person make comments, just don't reply or give likes.

 

How it feels? To my experience it feels good – with mentally "cut" it's out of my mind – I don't need to carry problems, those I can easily create enough of that myself.

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3 hours ago, bob smith said:

It is different in the UK.

 

No matter how bad it is there (and it is bad) it's nowhere near as bad as it is in the states.

 

The job centre WILL eventually find you a job.

That is what they do.

They are desperate for you to get off benefits and will go out of their way to help you.

Same with citizens advice. They can't house you, but they can tell you everything you need to know about waiting lists, council housing, shared accommodation etc.

 

I have had a decent experience in the past with british social services.

Unfortunately in Australia they privatised the job seeking services ,so apparently they only want people who have been unemployed 6 months or more so they get bigger commissions 

 

Mind you there is no unemployment here in Australia if you want to work

Hard to find tradies , retail workers etc 

Many restaurants closed ,no staff 

They are so desperate to bouncers outside nightclubs they are taking 70yo 's and I kid you not 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by georgegeorgia
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No. My family is my family and I do miss them.  A number of my friends come to Thailand, so I still meet up and see people.
However, the people I use to work with post-retirement have mostly faded away into obscurity.  Which actually is just fine.
No reason to burn bridges.

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On 11/1/2023 at 8:55 AM, bob smith said:

but then i’d never get anything done.

 

least I can still drive my bike pissed..


You can drive stoned too.  It's like running a video in slow motion. 

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16 minutes ago, khunPer said:

Yes, I don't need to keep contact with people I don't share anything with, or people that don't wish to keep the contact.

 

I learned at a mind control course how  easy it is to mentally "cut" connection. You don't need to be rude, just stop interacting. On Facebook for example, just unfollow – you can still be in the "friends list" – then it's easy stop interacting. If the cut person make comments, just don't reply or give likes.

 

How it feels? To my experience it feels good – with mentally "cut" it's out of my mind – I don't need to carry problems, those I can easily create enough of that myself.

A " mind control" course ? 🤣🤣

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14 minutes ago, georgegeorgia said:

Unfortunately in Australia they privatised the job seeking services ,so apparently they only want people who have been unemployed 6 months or more so they get bigger commissions 

 

Mind you there is no unemployment here in Australia if you want to work

Hard to find tradies , retail workers etc 

Many restaurants closed ,no staff 

They are so desperate to bouncers outside nightclubs they are taking 70yo 's and I kid you not 

 

 

 

 

 

What,s  the oz gov agency  "Workforce Australia" then? 300k jobs advertised

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