If you are lonely and desperate why not find a gf at the local hardware store?

[Gecko123]

My point of reference for the following comments is rural/small/medium sized towns in Thailand. 

 

39 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

IMO it is not at all difficult to find women here in their middle 30's and onwards.

 

I question whether this is based on superficial observations. I think we've exchanged perceptions on this issue on other threads in the past. Playful overtures of 'I want a pua farang' , 'I have a friend who wants a pua farang', 'help me find a pua farang' are often just idle banter from vendors looking to amuse themselves to see if you'll take the bait; with their husbands lolling away within easy earshot in a hammock in the background. Many of the women you imagine are "available", actually have husbands who work away from home as truck drivers, construction, factory workers, sometimes for years and years at a time.

 

51 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

There seems to be a considerable cohort of Thai men who regard women in their thirties as having reached their use-by date, judging by the comments I have had by Thai women. Divorce or desertion in that age bracket is apparently very common.

 

This observation does not track with what I have observed. The vast majority of Thai men in my area seem to remain married to the woman who is the mother of his children. Most Thai men, unless they are considerably wealthy or have playboy good looks are keenly aware that they will probably have difficulty starting a second family with a new woman. There is also often a very strong financial incentive to remain in the marriage if his livelihood is connected to the marriage, i.e., the husband and wife work as a team in business or if the farm land is owned by the wife. For example, in a husband and wife pork vendor team the husband travels to the wholesale market to buy the pork carcasses and the wife handles the retail sales end of the business. Many retail sales operations are husband and wife (mom and pop) operations which would not survive or be severely impaired if a divorce were to occur. I can cite numerous examples of men in their late 20's - early to mid 30's hooking up with older Thai women in their early to mid 40's. Can also cite several examples of Thai men who appear to me to be more physically attractive than their Thai female spouse, with the incentive being that the wife has ownership, access to, or will likely inherit farm land and other assets.

 

1 hour ago, Lacessit said:

Thai women do tend to age well, I have encountered quite a few in their forties who IMO are still stunners.

Not going to get into a fruitless debate about how well Thai women age, except to say that some do age well, while many do not. Farm work with exposure to sun, herbicides and pesticides, can be very aging. Access to medical and dental care is quite limited in rural Thailand. If a woman manages to avoid field work (which is a status symbol) she most often will find ways to supplement family income by opening a small grocery store or restaurant, both of which require long hours of fairly sedentary presence which also tends to contribute to premature aging. In general, I would not be in agreement with the assessment that Thai women age particularly well in rural/small town Thailand.

[eumenades]

23 hours ago, Will B Good said:

Worked one summer in one of those places.......by 5pm I was close to putting a bullet in my head.....it is soul destroying.

 

A great movie about this is 'Cashback' see : https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0460740/  For an ad-free version go to https://ok.ru/video/31391615616

[Kinok Farang]

I went in my local hardware store to buy "fork handles"

Guess what i got.

[owl sees all]

I was looking for a television a few years back. Went into Udon Thani store on the ring road. I was asked seven times by 7 different young ladies if I had a 'Madam'. Of course I said yes each time. The wife was waiting for me in the pick-up outside.

 

The only place where that has happened to me before was in Bansumran Fishing Park. There you could hire a girl for your fishy requirements for your overnight stay. She would put ya bait on and net the fish too. 

[rexpotter]

3 hours ago, cdemundo said:

You are wrong, Hummin hit the nail on the head with

 

 

"you can choose to be fair and square play the p4p, or pick girls for fun, convince them you are a good guy, and dump them whenever you feel for it!

What is worse in your opinion morally ? "

 

If you are some kind of prude you won't be able to admit it, or if you have never done anything mommy wouldn't approve of you won't really understand it.

But he is right.

You don't pay them to perform, you pay them to leave. An old timer told me that here many years ago. Its an insurance policy of sorts.

[charleskerins]

3 hours ago, BritManToo said:

I've found generally men are less 'users' than women.

 

A nice woman has no problem keeping a man.

(Definition of nice ......... one that doesn't shout, treats you well, has sex with you frequently and doesn't keep asking for money)

nm

Edited April 17 by charleskerins
nm

[owl sees all]

On 4/16/2024 at 12:14 PM, spidermike007 said:

Spot on. If you have some game, if you have a great sense of humor, and are able to make them laugh and feel relaxed, if you are decent looking, and dress well, and are well groomed, it can be quite easy here. Generally, Thai woman are very comfortable with their femininity, with flirting, and open to talking with someone who approaches them, very unlike women in the West, these days. Of course, it also depends on who you pursue. If you are going after wealthy women, who are wearing $3,500 outfits, you will likely get turned down. 

 

If you are in your 30's, Thailand is your oyster. But, for single men who are older, there are hundreds of thousands of good looking, younger Thai women who are open to being with a foreigner, as long as he is financially stable. 98% of women want that stability. You simply need to be very assertive, have some game, hopefully have a minimal amount of bling, and a great sense of humor. If you can get them to laugh within a few moments of striking up a conversation with them, you are on your way. Gals who work in hotels, restaurants, retail stores, etc. Stay away from the beach areas, and you will be fine, finding a real civilian. Step up to the plate often, and just approach as many strangers are you can. Make a sport of it.

This post is bang on the money. However; if I may, I'd like to add just a couple of titbits.

 

When talking to a young lady, look into her eyes. When she is talking; look at her mouth. Makes them feel secure.

 

Finding the more wealthy lady is not that difficult. I have found the best thing is to get interested in a sport. Swimming, fencing or even weight lifting. Generous applause and the occasional 'whoop', will not go unnoticed. Curiosity will get to the contestant's mums, and they will soon befriend you.

 

 

[Freddy42OZ]

On 4/16/2024 at 12:14 PM, spidermike007 said:

if you are decent looking, and dress well, and are well groomed

 

 

Well that probably precludes about 90% of the old blokes I see in Bangkok 😂

Cargo shorts and sandals does NOT equal well dressed. 

[Lacessit]

46 minutes ago, Gecko123 said:

My point of reference for the following comments is rural/small/medium sized towns in Thailand. 

 

 

I question whether this is based on superficial observations. I think we've exchanged perceptions on this issue on other threads in the past. Playful overtures of 'I want a pua farang' , 'I have a friend who wants a pua farang', 'help me find a pua farang' are often just idle banter from vendors looking to amuse themselves to see if you'll take the bait; with their husbands lolling away within easy earshot in a hammock in the background. Many of the women you imagine are "available", actually have husbands who work away from home as truck drivers, construction, factory workers, sometimes for years and years at a time.

 

 

This observation does not track with what I have observed. The vast majority of Thai men in my area seem to remain married to the woman who is the mother of his children. Most Thai men, unless they are considerably wealthy or have playboy good looks are keenly aware that they will probably have difficulty starting a second family with a new woman. There is also often a very strong financial incentive to remain in the marriage if his livelihood is connected to the marriage, i.e., the husband and wife work as a team in business or if the farm land is owned by the wife. For example, in a husband and wife pork vendor team the husband travels to the wholesale market to buy the pork carcasses and the wife handles the retail sales end of the business. Many retail sales operations are husband and wife (mom and pop) operations which would not survive or be severely impaired if a divorce were to occur. I can cite numerous examples of men in their late 20's - early to mid 30's hooking up with older Thai women in their early to mid 40's. Can also cite several examples of Thai men who appear to me to be more physically attractive than their Thai female spouse, with the incentive being that the wife has ownership, access to, or will likely inherit farm land and other assets.

 

Not going to get into a fruitless debate about how well Thai women age, except to say that some do age well, while many do not. Farm work with exposure to sun, herbicides and pesticides, can be very aging. Access to medical and dental care is quite limited in rural Thailand. If a woman manages to avoid field work (which is a status symbol) she most often will find ways to supplement family income by opening a small grocery store or restaurant, both of which require long hours of fairly sedentary presence which also tends to contribute to premature aging. In general, I would not be in agreement with the assessment that Thai women age particularly well in rural/small town Thailand.

Possibly we are moving in different social circles, not that I am a party animal. The women I am in contact with mostly staff small shops, restaurants etc.

 

I am obviously lucky, my GF has worked in the rice fields. Most men meeting her for the first time think she is mid-thirties. She is 57 yo.

 

I'd agree Thai rural society appears to be matrilineal, land seems to be passed down by inheritance on the distaff side.

 

I'd disagree on the banter observation, I've had some very direct overtures from Thai women, they were not kidding. I attribute that to finances, not good looks.

 

As for medical and dental, government hospitals are 30 baht for a Thai. The dental profession seems to be mainly about straightening teeth. IMO Thais don't get many cavities. They drink a lot of tea ( cha )

which is rich in fluorides.

[mancub]

45 minutes ago, owl sees all said:

Generous applause and the occasional 'whoop', will not go unnoticed. Curiosity will get to the contestant's mums, and they will soon befriend you.

Or get someone to escort you off the premises 😁

[PETERTHEEATER]

On 4/16/2024 at 7:12 AM, Dmaxdan said:

Are you suggesting that if you walk into a hardware store and say to a female assistant "I need a screw, can you help?" you wlll get more than you bargained for? 

And what happens if you ask for wood...

Don't ever ask for penetrating oil........

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, Kinok Farang said:

I went in my local hardware store to buy "fork handles"

Guess what i got.

 

[fredwiggy]

5 hours ago, BritManToo said:

But all your relationships with women ended in failure!

Most relationships end that way, or continue although they have failed. A successful relationship continues because of exactly what I said. There isn't any argument over this. Millions of people stay in miserable relationships for one reason or another. Usually children or financial, but fear of the unknown is another. I had children with a few of these women so that's not a failure, even though our relationship didn't work. People part for many reasons, and if two can't see a future together, it wasn't a failure if it ends but necessary so they can go on and find one better suited for each. You can spend a lot of good time with someone but need to part because of many reasons. This doesn't mean it failed but just ended for positive reasons. I had almost 100 girlfriends and we all parted ways because our future plans weren't the same. Failure or success? Every relationship you've ever had failed if you look at it that way.Are you better off now than before? If yes, then those relationships you had led to this one, and if this one is a success, you've succeeded, at least for now.

[BritManToo]

7 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Most relationships end that way, or continue although they have failed. A successful relationship continues because of exactly what I said. There isn't any argument over this. Millions of people stay in miserable relationships for one reason or another. Usually children or financial, but fear of the unknown is another. I had children with a few of these women so that's not a failure, even though our relationship didn't work. People part for many reasons, and if two can't see a future together, it wasn't a failure if it ends but necessary so they can go on and find one better suited for each. You can spend a lot of good time with someone but need to part because of many reasons. This doesn't mean it failed but just ended for positive reasons. I had almost 100 girlfriends and we all parted ways because our future plans weren't the same. Failure or success? Every relationship you've ever had failed if you look at it that way.Are you better off now than before? If yes, then those relationships you had led to this one, and if this one is a success, you've succeeded, at least for now.

 

I've always noticed that no woman wants to have sex with a guy because he's nice.

I've also known a few really nice guys and they were invisible to women, couldn't even bang a Thai bar girl.

What women want in their bed is a thuggish brutal man that will beat and abuse them.

Murderers, drug dealers, gang members all have their pick of attractive women.

Nice guys, that are polite, treat women as their equals, and show women respect ....... not so much.

Sure they'll marry a nice guy that will pay for everything, but they won't want to have sex with him and will avoid it at all costs.

 

Edited April 17 by BritManToo

[Robert Paulson]

Yes and they are all just waiting to cheat on their current boyfriends 

[rattlesnake]

5 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

 

I've always noticed that no woman wants to have sex with a guy because he's nice.

I've also known a few really nice guys and they were invisible to women, couldn't even bang a Thai bar girl.

What women want in their bed is a thuggish brutal man that will beat and abuse them.

Murderers, drug dealers, gang members all have their pick of attractive women.

Nice guys, that are polite, treat women as their equals, and show women respect ....... not so much.

Sure they'll marry a nice guy that will pay for everything, but they won't want to have sex with him and will avoid it at all costs.

 

 

There is some truth to that. Lots of women are instinctively, unconsciously wired to look for Alpha males, and therefore they are often attracted to loud-mouthed, vulgar cretins, often without even being able to explain it themselves.

[Olmate]

6 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

 

I've always noticed that no woman wants to have sex with a guy because he's nice.

I've also known a few really nice guys and they were invisible to women, couldn't even bang a Thai bar girl.

What women want in their bed is a thuggish brutal man that will beat and abuse them.

Murderers, drug dealers, gang members all have their pick of attractive women.

Nice guys, that are polite, treat women as their equals, and show women respect ....... not so much.

Sure they'll marry a nice guy that will pay for everything, but they won't want to have sex with him and will avoid it at all costs.

 

See your run in with the murdering thugish, brutal man on your scoot still pissing you. Hope your on the mend tho and back to normal soon.! 

[fredwiggy]

2 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

 

I've always noticed that no woman wants to have sex with a guy because he's nice.

I've also known a few really nice guys and they were invisible to women, couldn't even bang a Thai bar girl.

What women want in their bed is a thuggish brutal man that will beat and abuse them.

Murderers, drug dealers, gang members all have their pick of attractive women.

Nice guys, that are polite, treat women as their equals, and show women respect ....... not so much.

Sure they'll marry a nice guy that will pay for everything, but they won't want to have sex with him and will avoid it at all costs.

 

In the west, as here , I've always treated women with respect, kindness and love, along with the generosity I could afford. Of course mutual attraction is usually always the first thing, but then it's what can he do for me later? Sex always happened in every relationship Ive had, including the marriages. It was the lack of communication and abuse in some that ended it for me.

 

It's true what you've said that many men are invisible to some women, but many women, although some having high intelligence, do not get men at all. They think the bad boy is a catch because he isn't as easy to obtain as the nice guys who are pursuing them with kindness. The dark side is somehow attractive to them, and this isn't a smart thing in any event, as sometimes that's all they'll get. There are millions of men who treat their women nice, and are animals in bed, but the women don't see this because they aren't going after them.

 

A woman, and there are many, that comes from a home with turmoil, beatings ,neglect, indifference or absent fathers will always be looking for the perfect man that dad wasn't. And she will be actually looking at men just like dad, although of course this is a huge mistake, because what she needs is the opposite. Stability. Many women who pursue scumbags for one reason or another regret it but it takes them awhile to realize they deserve better. Low self esteem from a bad home life tells women they aren't good enough, and this follows into a normal relationship they might have later, and hurts or ruins it for them. They have been treated badly for so long, they can't understand how a man can treat them good all the time. It has to end, it's impossible that he really loves me. If God picked your partners, knowing you better than you do yourself, we would all succeed. The <deleted> would be with the trash, and the good with the good. Doesn't happen that way. We make mistakes picking partners or some just look to use because they are damaged themselves. This is what I meant when I said that two that look to each other for comfort, safety, an alliance, future mutual plans, friendship and trust will always succeed. When one does all the work, it will usually fail, or you'll live a life of misery.

[BritManToo]

14 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

In the west, as here , I've always treated women with respect, kindness and love,

And this is why all your relationships fail.

Women just don't want what you offer.

[Kinok Farang]

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

 

Still one of the best sketches ever.

[BritManToo]

22 minutes ago, Olmate said:

See your run in with the murdering thugish, brutal man on your scoot still pissing you. Hope your on the mend tho and back to normal soon.! 

That guy was a bit girly and mentally ill.

Women generally don't want mentally ill men.

[owl sees all]

1 hour ago, mancub said:

Or get someone to escort you off the premises 😁

Applause t the appropriate moment. Of course not when a swimmer has been disqualified or when the weightlifter drops the weight on his foot.

 

No! Just show enthusiasm and appreciation. Soon have the mums around.

[fredwiggy]

41 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

And this is why all your relationships fail.

Women just don't want what you offer.

Tell that to the 100. Long term,? I left the majority of them because our plans didn't match, they were trashy, liars or just good women who weren't right for me. Simple. I've worked out for over 50 years and kept a Rambo type body from teenage to around 55. Now I lost muscle because of not working out as much, but still look much younger. I'm responsible, caring, loving, faithful, loyal, a good provider, caring lover and father. What wouldn't they want? A woman that doesn't want that, who is attracted to me, as no one attracts everyone , is a narcissist, has major depression and can't give what's needed, is holding major baggage from childhood, is overly greedy or has unrealistic expectations of marriage. This of course describes many women, so you should understand why I'm not married to all 100. There are countless women who would want me and others like me, but the world has taught many people they deserve more than they get, and I can't be more then one place at a time. I don't want serial relationships, preferring one long term at a time want to be married, to the right one, and many women are afraid of men, so they won\t take a chance with one until they get to know him, which takes both being single in the right place at the right time. Normal women want what I offer, but normal women aren't easy to find. Why say that all my relationships failed when most others are the same, including yourself? Aren't many people that get married to the first person they meet and last forever.

Edited April 17 by fredwiggy

[owl sees all]

15 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Tell that to the 100. Long term,? I left the majority of them because our plans didn't match, they were trashy, liars or just good women who weren't right for me. Simple. I've worked out for over 50 years and kept a Rambo type body from teenage to around 55. Now I lost muscle because of not working out as much, but still look much younger. I'm responsible, caring, loving, faithful, loyal, a good provider, caring lover and father. What wouldn't they want? A woman that doesn't want that, who is attracted to me, as no one attracts everyone , is a narcissist, has major depression and can't give what's needed, is holding major baggage from childhood, is overly greedy or has unrealistic expectations of marriage. This of course describes many women, so you should understand why I'm not married to all 100. There are countless women who would want me and others like me, but the world has taught many people they deserve more than they get, and I can't be more then one place at a time. I don't want serial relationships, preferring one long term at a time want to be married, to the right one, and many women are afraid of men, so they won\t take a chance with one until they get to know him, which takes both being single in the right place at the right time. Normal women want what I offer, but normal women aren't easy to find. Why say that all my relationships failed when most others are the same, including yourself? Aren't many people that get married to the first person they meet and last forever.

Great post. Interesting concepts. But ever heard of paragraphs?

[fredwiggy]

13 minutes ago, owl sees all said:

Great post. Interesting concepts. But ever heard of paragraphs?

Just a few words over the recommended length and all the same subject, so I left it like that.

[Korat Kiwi]

No point in coming up for air aye? 

[Will B Good]

4 hours ago, Kinok Farang said:

I went in my local hardware store to buy "fork handles"

Guess what i got.

Bathroom plug?

[MangoKorat]

12 hours ago, Lacessit said:

I don't know why, but there's been quite a few Thai women who have flirted with me.

Oh that's easy..................A................T..........M

 

Joking, take no notice.  I've had them come on to me too, however, these days, I don't kid myself its because of my boyish good looks.  Those one's - I play at their own game.

 

There are younger Thai women that will genuinely accept an older man, even look for one.  However, and I mean this sincerely, genuine can have a different meaning in Asia. Many girls are taught that one of the things they should be looking for in a partner is financial stability and more often than not, that's easier to find in an older man.

 

I think though, that left to their own devices and with no need for an finance, 99% of them would choose someone in their own age group or a little older - much the same as Western girls.

 

I think we just have to ask ourselves - when we were 25, did we find 50-60 year old women attractive?

Edited April 17 by MangoKorat

[MangoKorat]

4 hours ago, BritManToo said:

What women want in their bed is a thuggish brutal man that will beat and abuse them.

Really? I find that what they want is a good f..........

[MangoKorat]

6 hours ago, owl sees all said:

The only place where that has happened to me before was in Bansumran Fishing Park. There you could hire a girl for your fishy requirements for your overnight stay. She would put ya bait on and net the fish too. 

Where is this place please? 😁😁😁