Can somebody please explain this to me..

[bob smith]

.. what is the deal with thai men?

 

why are they so reluctant to form a friendship with farangs?

 

99% of the thai men that I meet seem to have some kind of social barrier when it comes to farang men...

what are the reasons for this?

I find it very perplexing..

 

Are they scared of us?

Intimidated by us?

think they are bigger/better than us?

or do they just not like us??

 

I know that some people may have thai male friends but after many years living here i have precisely zero thai male friends.

 

I have many lady friends. and if it all comes down purely to 'cultural differences', then why are the women much more open to talking to/befriending western men?

 

This I find very strange indeed.

 

bob.

 

 

Edited August 30 by bob smith

[MalcolmB]

6 minutes ago, bob smith said:

I know that some people may have thai male friends but after many years living here i have precisely zero thai male friends.

Thai males remind me of dogs.

They have a built in sense of being able to judge a good or bad character. 
 

I remember you posting on another thread about drinking with your Thai male friends. 
Perhaps they were imaginary like the friends you claimed to be with in Koh Chang this weekend? 
 

Still waiting for your photo of all the booze you claimed to have bought for the trip in the “boot” of your van you hired.

[CharlieH]

In my experience, those Thai males that are fluent in English and have confidence in their ability its never an issue. Those that are not tend to keep very basic sentences and simply don't know how and with the Asian "losing face" embarrassment factor they simple choose not to engage.

 

 

[Hummin]

I have only two thai friends during my time in Thailand. One climber and one chef, and both benefits from my friendship as well I benefit from them. However Im not climbing anymore, but we still in touch, and also see each other when our paths crosses. The chef I go driving motorbikes together with, so not only his culinary skills that attracted me to him. 

 

All the female friends I had, is gone to other directions, new bf, husbands, and also dissapeared when I got a new gf/wife. 

[Will B Good]

12 minutes ago, bob smith said:

.. what is the deal with thai men?

 

why are they so reluctant to form a friendship with farangs?

 

99% of the thai men that I meet seem to have some kind of social barrier when it comes to farang men...

what are the reasons for this?

I find it very perplexing..

 

Are they scared of us?

Intimidated by us?

think they are bigger/better than us?

or do they just not like us??

 

I know that some people may have thai male friends but after many years living here i have precisely zero thai male friends.

 

I have many lady friends. and if it all comes down purely to 'cultural differences', then why are the women much more open to talking to/befriending western men?

 

This I find very strange indeed.

 

bob.

 

 

 

 

On a serious note.....unless their English is quite good I imagine they are very reticent to talk.

 

Thai 'face' being what it is, they maybe be horrified at having their efforts to talk in English mocked.

 

 

[bob smith]

1 minute ago, CharlieH said:

In me experience, those Thai males that are fluent in English and have confidence in their ability its never an issue. Those that are not tend to keep very basic sentences and simply don't know how and with the Asian "losing face" embarrassment factor they simple choose not to engage.

 

 

Thanks for your input, charlie.

 

that still doesn't answer the question of why are thai women more open than thai men to friendships with foreigners.

 

I personally think there is a lot more to it than just the language barrier..

 

bob.

[Will B Good]

Just now, bob smith said:

Thanks for your input, charlie.

 

that still doesn't answer the question of why are thai women more open than thai men to friendships with foreigners.

 

I personally think there is a lot more to it than just the language barrier..

 

bob.

 

 

Thai men know they aren't going to get any money out of you......women just might.

[bob smith]

2 minutes ago, Will B Good said:

 

 

Thai men know they aren't going to get any money out of you......women just might.

Thai women pay me out all the time.

 

bob.

[Cameroni]

19 minutes ago, bob smith said:

.. what is the deal with thai men?

 

why are they so reluctant to form a friendship with farangs?

 

99% of the thai men that I meet seem to have some kind of social barrier when it comes to farang men...

what are the reasons for this?

I find it very perplexing..

 

Are they scared of us?

Intimidated by us?

think they are bigger/better than us?

or do they just not like us??

 

I know that some people may have thai male friends but after many years living here i have precisely zero thai male friends.

 

I have many lady friends. and if it all comes down purely to 'cultural differences', then why are the women much more open to talking to/befriending western men?

 

This I find very strange indeed.

 

bob.

 

 

 

How would you feel if people came to your country to take all the women?

 

And worse, the women go for that?

[Will B Good]

1 minute ago, bob smith said:

Thai women pay me out all the time.

 

bob.

 

 

Don't.....a bit nearly popped out.

[Trippy]

1 minute ago, bob smith said:

Thai women pay me out all the time.

 

bob.

This forum really needs a B.S. button.

[bob smith]

Just now, Cameroni said:

 

How would you feel if people came to your country to take all the women?

 

And worse, the women go for that?

I'd up my game.

 

if you can't beat em, join em!

 

bob.

[Will B Good]

Just now, Cameroni said:

 

How would you feel if people came to your country to take all the women?

 

And worse, the women go for that?

 

 

I've often wondered about that......but got to say I've never seen even a hint of distaste, anger, resentment from anyone.

 

Maybe it is done subtly ??

[chickenslegs]

1 minute ago, Trippy said:

This forum really needs a B.S. button.

BS - Bob Smith - coincidence?

[RSD1]

18 minutes ago, bob smith said:

.. what is the deal with thai men?

 

why are they so reluctant to form a friendship with farangs?

 

99% of the thai men that I meet seem to have some kind of social barrier when it comes to farang men...

what are the reasons for this?

I find it very perplexing..

 

Are they scared of us?

Intimidated by us?

think they are bigger/better than us?

or do they just not like us??

 

I know that some people may have thai male friends but after many years living here i have precisely zero thai male friends.

 

I have many lady friends. and if it all comes down purely to 'cultural differences', then why are the women much more open to talking to/befriending western men?

 

This I find very strange indeed.

 

bob.

 

 

Try dressing in pink colored shirts, tight purple lycra shorts and some neon green trainers for a week. You'll make lots of Thai male friends in no time. You'll even have them coming out of your as* faster than you can say "where's the beef". 

[bob smith]

2 minutes ago, Will B Good said:

Maybe it is done subtly ??

if there's one thing thai men love to do it's talk behind someone's back.

 

it's perfected to a science here..

 

bob.

[simon43]

9 minutes ago, Will B Good said:

 

 

On a serious note.....unless their English is quite good I imagine they are very reticent to talk.

 

Thai 'face' being what it is, they maybe be horrified at having their efforts to talk in English mocked.

 

 

This is very true.  When I go to a Thai restaurant and speak in Thai, then I can't stop the Thai men chatting away with me. To be honest, I have never had a problem with unfriendly/shy Thai males, so long as they are speaking in Thai to me.  I think any person, Thai or not, male or female, will always be more confident to chat in their mother tongue.

[Will B Good]

Just now, bob smith said:

if there's one thing thai men love to do it's talk behind someone's back.

 

it's perfected to a science here..

 

bob.

 

I assume so.....I know the only topic of conversation in the village is what the neighbours are upto ......they even have their own FB page so they can bitch.

[Hummin]

you have to seek men on your own level and cultural background Bob. Reading your posts here, it seems like it shouldnt be a problem if you just seek out Thai men in their natural enviroment. Will cost you a drink or two to keep their friendships

[Trippy]

6 minutes ago, chickenslegs said:

BS - Bob Smith - coincidence?

Ahh, that explains everything. Thanks

[Will B Good]

1 minute ago, simon43 said:

This is very true.  When I go to a Thai restaurant and speak in Thai, then I can't stop the Thai men chatting away with me. To be honest, I have never had a problem with unfriendly/shy Thai males, so long as they are speaking in Thai to me.  I think any person, Thai or not, male or female, will always be more confident to chat in their mother tongue.

 

 

Sadly I am a case in point......lived in Germany for many years but I would die if I had to speak German in front of Germans or Brits who could speak German well.

[bob smith]

3 minutes ago, Will B Good said:

 

I assume so.....I know the only topic of conversation in the village is what the neighbours are upto ......they even have their own FB page so they can bitch.

...ever been a member of a moo baan community line group before??

 

goodness me..

 

bob.

[nikmar]

Im sure you started this or a very similar conversation a while back.

 

As I said then, I think it's you Bob. I have Thai male friends. It was just as easy forming a frienship with them as it was to form friendships with men back home. 

 

I think having some level social skills helps

[Will B Good]

Just now, bob smith said:

...ever been a member of a moo baan community line group before??

 

goodness me..

 

bob.

 

No....but I know the wife spends a good proportion of everyday on theirs.....555

[bob smith]

4 minutes ago, nikmar said:

I have Thai male friends.

Like I said, everyone's situation is unique.

 

there are those that have many male thai friends.

 

for me it seems no matter how social I am they just aren't interested..

 

bob.

[DEKEM]

it's the language barrier.  if you speak thai I think you will have many thai friends who will enjoy hanging out with you.  that is why people should learn the language of the country that they want to live in.  I know 4 languages for this very reason.  next year I'm going to japan and the plan is to learn japanese.  common sense.

[Gandtee]

20 minutes ago, bob smith said:

Thanks for your input, charlie.

 

that still doesn't answer the question of why are thai women more open than thai men to friendships with foreigners.

 

I personally think there is a lot more to it than just the language barrier..

 

bob.

Did you buy your female friends? Money can buy some sort of friendship, I would imagine. But when the dosh is gone, 'No money. No honey.'

[cjinchiangrai]

There are social conventions that we do not always get. The women cook and serve, the men sit and drink. You can help a little but you will make more friends downing a shot of lao khao.

[bob smith]

1 minute ago, DEKEM said:

it's the language barrier.  if you speak thai I think you will have many thai friends who will enjoy hanging out with you.  that is why people should learn the language of the country that they want to live in.  I know 4 languages for this very reason.  next year I'm going to japan and the plan is to learn japanese.  common sense.

I speak Thai.

 

bob.

[Gandtee]

1 minute ago, DEKEM said:

it's the language barrier.  if you speak thai I think you will have many thai friends who will enjoy hanging out with you.  that is why people should learn the language of the country that they want to live in.  I know 4 languages for this very reason.  next year I'm going to japan and the plan is to learn japanese.  common sense.

My biggest regret is not learning the language. It becomes very important when you reach old age.