Foreigners Living In Bangkok

[Underbelly]

I have been here for a few months now and met many foreigners in bangkok.

I've met some of the Bangkok bangers team which are a great bunch of blokes who I hope to be playing with next month. Meet some really down to earth foreigners also.

But I have met some really miserable blokes, I'm a pretty friendly bloke and talk to anyone and I have met many miserable blokes and notices that they are usually in group.

One group of about 9 guys who my friends and I challenged for the table were always puting down Thai's and saying how stupid they are, telling the girls behind the bar to get them a drink in a rude manner. After we beat them for the table they wanted a rematch, after we beat them again they started blaming the table saying how Thai pool tables are all crap etc etc.

I mean we just left before one of us got set off, I mean plently of people here know the faults here and are aware, but we seem to move on. But I have never seen so many miserable foreigners talking down to the locals anywhere I have travelled.

Why is this?

[wasabi]

You have to wonder if these Farang think Thai's are so stupid why do they chose to live here? I think they enjoy having someone to look down upon and find fault with in order to make themselves seem better. It's pretty easy to think of different as wrong.

Personally I do think my own country is better overall than Thailand but that doesn't mean I don't like the Thai's and Thailand and I do recognize there are some things that they do better over here. At the moment I am just waiting for my Wife's visa to be ready than I will go home so I am putting my money where my mouth is. But for those who go on and on complaining yet stick around when they don't have to, I don't get it.

Edited March 29, 2009 by wasabi

[samuibeachcomber]

usually when people get like this it means they 've been here too long,have n't made a success of their transition etc etc.

and if they ever return home will act in exactly the same way as they did in thailand.there's just no pleasing some people.

[barrybike]

i suppose there is ass holes no matter where you go ..if i met these guys id suss them out in a few minutes and i wouldnt even bother talking to them and go on about my business else where........it costs nothing to be nice.......

[Jimjim]

Well, Bangkok is a hot, crowded, polluted city so that could have something to do with it. I liked living there but sometimes the lack of a nice, open stretch of nature could really get on my nerves. Bangkok is fun and interesting, etc. but it's hard to get any peace, quiet and relaxation in that chaotic city environment.

[mark5335]

Well, Bangkok is a hot, crowded, polluted city so that could have something to do with it. I liked living there but sometimes the lack of a nice, open stretch of nature could really get on my nerves. Bangkok is fun and interesting, etc. but it's hard to get any peace, quiet and relaxation in that chaotic city environment.

I agree with Jimjim. I need to get out town every couple of months for a breather goiven the crowds, traffic et al. The godd tihng is that a weekend away is only 1 - 2 hour drive out of Bangkok....to re-charge the batteries, relax etc.

[Underbelly]

Yes well they looked like they been here for years, but there not the only ones in the pubs who moan the hole time, I have met many others and try to avoid them.

I have only been here a few months now and who knows, after 30 or 40 years later I might turn into grump too.

Im sure there are people like this all over the world, as I remember reading on the aussie news forums about how many people post how aussies are stupid etc etc. Maybe its just human nature

[hhgz]

Many of the farangs in BKK are only here because they've ran away from their responsibilities in their home country. They've found themselves in a new country without having sufficient resources (open mindedness, financial, ability to deal with ambiguity), and with their insecurity by resorting to racism and nationalism. They were marginalized at home, and they thought that "having more money than the Thais" would make them better - it only made them bitter. As they realized that their are many non-white people in Thailand with a lot more money than they'll ever have, they become even more despondent. As you noticed, they travel in herds - much like beasts of burden - and just like the beasts, they refuse to bathe. Ugh!

[PhilHarries]

You have to wonder if these Farang think Thai's are so stupid why do they chose to live here? I think they enjoy having someone to look down upon and find fault with in order to make themselves seem better. It's pretty easy to think of different as wrong.

Answer : It's cheap.

Let's face it if Thailand were a top dog developed country with all the facilities expected back in farangland but at the same prices these types wouldn't be seen for dust.

Yes we all have our moments but you have to take a step back and look at the big picture, then all the little irritations don't seem so bad.

Another thing a lot of long term expats could do with doing is a home run every couple of years as a kind of reality check. A few weeks back in your home country does wonders for your sense of proportion. Who knows but a few of these whingers might find that they actually like their homeland and stay there where they can moan in good company and they can even try insulting the barmaids, see where that gets them.

[bkkjames]

Many of the farangs in BKK are only here because they've ran away from their responsibilities in their home country. They've found themselves in a new country without having sufficient resources (open mindedness, financial, ability to deal with ambiguity), and with their insecurity by resorting to racism and nationalism. They were marginalized at home, and they thought that "having more money than the Thais" would make them better - it only made them bitter. As they realized that their are many non-white people in Thailand with a lot more money than they'll ever have, they become even more despondent. As you noticed, they travel in herds - much like beasts of burden - and just like the beasts, they refuse to bathe. Ugh!

Not a bad opening few lines HHGZ - you had my attention, but alas your last two sentences once again let you down.

[OxfordWill]

I dont think there are more <deleted> than anywhere else. The thing is those who are happy here are so much more happy than most other places, than the contrast is stark between the happy and the normally grumpy.

[phetaroi]

I think it has more to do with the overall reason they are here.

One group has a professional life (or retirement life) that fulfills them and would lead to general satisfaction in life no matter where they were. At one time I was applying for some teaching/administrative positions here and met and talked with quite a few educators. For the most part, happy and relatively contented. They enjoyed their jobs, had interesting lives outside the classroom, and in fact, the only ones who seemed discontented would have been just as discontented back in the States.

The other group is here for all the wrong reasons. The biggest part of their life is party, party, party...which to be honest, can get rather boring after a while...very shallow. They came expecting everything -- including sex -- to be cheap. They often "look down" on Thais (although they may not plan it that way), and the Thais they meet realize it...therefore, few long-term friendships with responsible locals. The locals they do associate with most are those looking for a free ride.

I had an American friend who was raised in Europe. He never lived in Thailand, but would be here on long stints (sometimes months at a time) advising on infrastructure projects for the Thai government. He didn't believe he should adjust his living style at all. He liked Thai people, but tried to converse with them, no matter what their background, in advanced English...giving them the feeling of being left out of conversations. They would drift away as a result, and then he would say, "See, they're not very loyal in terms of friendships." He said he loved Thailand, but was always complaining why everything wasn't as good as in the States. "Why can't they make a really good hamburger?" "Why can't they make a really good pizza?" "Why don't people line up properly at the post office?" He could not conceive of the concept of "mai pben rai." Eventually, even I got tired of him and drifted away.

[Alwaysright]

i suppose there is ass holes no matter where you go ..if i met these guys id suss them out in a few minutes and i wouldnt even bother talking to them and go on about my business else where........it costs nothing to be nice.......

Everybody has an ahole,some people have two.You find them all over not just Thailand.

[473geo]

I think it is boredom. A group of people can hang out one, two, times a week ok........if you meet most days, spend hours together, same people, the conversation stagnates......everybody has heard most of the stories before, the jokes become repetative, people know most of what others are prepared to let them know about themselves.........in a relatively short time having a group as the only 'interest' in their lives stiffles conversation. So what is one thing that people can do and change topic every day.......moan. The other of course found in the villages for the same reasons is...... gossip.

[Super Hans]

I have been here for a few months now and met many foreigners in bangkok.

I've met some of the Bangkok bangers team which are a great bunch of blokes who I hope to be playing with next month. Meet some really down to earth foreigners also.

But I have met some really miserable blokes, I'm a pretty friendly bloke and talk to anyone and I have met many miserable blokes and notices that they are usually in group.

One group of about 9 guys who my friends and I challenged for the table were always puting down Thai's and saying how stupid they are, telling the girls behind the bar to get them a drink in a rude manner. After we beat them for the table they wanted a rematch, after we beat them again they started blaming the table saying how Thai pool tables are all crap etc etc.

I mean we just left before one of us got set off, I mean plently of people here know the faults here and are aware, but we seem to move on. But I have never seen so many miserable foreigners talking down to the locals anywhere I have travelled.

Why is this?

Which bar were you in?

[webfact]

After reading all the posts carefully I can confirm nothing has changed since I have arrived here 23y ago.

This time forums were not available to voice an opinion but I (we) had the same impressions, questions and thoughts as voiced in this thread. Quite amazing...

Edited March 30, 2009 by webfact

[neverdie]

I rarely see other farangs in Thailand'& the only place I hear people having a good old winge is here on Thai Visa & I wouldnt mind taking a stick to a couple of the regular posters either......I bet a few of you are thinking that about me .....its all good

[Travel2003]

I believe most of the neigbour countries experience their fair share of people like that.

Right now, there is a group of foreigners in a bar somewhere in Manila, talking shit about their host country.

Right now, a group of people sit in a bar somewhere in Saigon and do the same.

Same same, but different a..holes.

[Ulysses G.]

He said he loved Thailand, but was always complaining why everything wasn't as good as in the States. "Why can't they make a really good hamburger?" "Why can't they make a really good pizza?" "Why don't people line up properly at the post office?"

Actually, he is right about all of this, but if they got all that stuff down, they probably would not be so friendly to foreigners.

[patklang]

Many of the farangs in BKK are only here because they've ran away from their responsibilities in their home country. They've found themselves in a new country without having sufficient resources (open mindedness, financial, ability to deal with ambiguity), and with their insecurity by resorting to racism and nationalism. They were marginalized at home, and they thought that "having more money than the Thais" would make them better - it only made them bitter. As they realized that their are many non-white people in Thailand with a lot more money than they'll ever have, they become even more despondent. As you noticed, they travel in herds - much like beasts of burden - and just like the beasts, they refuse to bathe. Ugh!

Sorry not been nasty but what a load of crap.Most of the other posters have good points

[Furbie]

OP, you may well turn into a grump. Thailand can be a seriously frustrating place, especially if you have nothing to keep you grounded – family, career, etc. Let's face it, Thailand does have a large number of asses, but that will likely not change. However, I have also met some truly great expats during my years here.

What many people seem to forget, however, is that Thais have amazingly similar complaints about the behavior of their fellow Thais – so it always amuses me when some expats jump on other expats due to these complaints. Some examples:

1) My boss called her secretary a Thai word just short of stupid yesterday (while I may agree, I could certainly never get away with it).

2) One of my male colleagues is constantly saying how dumb his maid is and that she is too stupid to train.

3) I have seen Thai customers lose it on service staff on many occasions.

4) I have seen a Thai person scream at someone for cutting them in line – frankly, if this happened more often the line cutting would stop.

5) I especially have heard professional Thais say all sorts of nasty things about the working class – things that would make the most grumpy expat blush.

6) I have had colleagues complain about TRUE's customer service – our IT guy actually e-mailed me to point out this is the stupidest company he ever dealt with.

The list goes on and on. Complaining is a part of life – and there is plenty to complain about in Thailand. Frankly, the expats I see who are most well adjusted have a good home life (wife, kids), a driver (no more daily taxi or driving grind) and a secretary (no more dealing with any utilities, messengers, booking, reservations) – basically eliminating the most stressful aspects of life in Thailand. Sadly, I only have one of the three so far – though my secretary is great and my stress level is down significantly since I have basically not had to have a phone conversation with any service company in some time.

To a certain extent, I have become a much less friendly person in Thailand because I want to avoid these type of people. However, it is not always possible. Good luck. When/if you reach the day the bad outweighs the good, get out, or else its grumpy time.

[tb86]

Many of the farangs in BKK are only here because they've ran away from their responsibilities in their home country. They've found themselves in a new country without having sufficient resources (open mindedness, financial, ability to deal with ambiguity), and with their insecurity by resorting to racism and nationalism. They were marginalized at home, and they thought that "having more money than the Thais" would make them better - it only made them bitter. As they realized that their are many non-white people in Thailand with a lot more money than they'll ever have, they become even more despondent. As you noticed, they travel in herds - much like beasts of burden - and just like the beasts, they refuse to bathe. Ugh!

Sorry not been nasty but what a load of crap.Most of the other posters have good points

i wouldnt say most expats but I think this is a very valid point though. Some transplants come here with the mind set of "im gonna be a big shot with my pension ect.." and quickly or slowly realize that they are no different than a middle class bangkok thai and they arent all that rich, or that no one cares. Thailand seems to have a fantasy world auora to it that effects some expats,,,, its just after spending some time here they realize that fantasy is an illusion or out of their reach, thus we get some of bitter guys.

[phetaroi]

4) I have seen a Thai person scream at someone for cutting them in line – frankly, if this happened more often the line cutting would stop.

What I have found usually works in this case is not screaming, but silently stepping just to their side and looking them directly in the face. Then they start the, "Oh, I'm sorry. Were you in line?" routine.

[on-on]

It's been demonstrated in exhaustive studies that the ratio of both miserable and boastful expats who love to bitch acrimoniously and endlessly about "the fookin Thais" varies directly with the number of pool tables in your vicinity. While the presence of pool tables will not guarantee these types and the presence of these types will not guarantee pool tables, there's a high correlation. Another thing that varies directly with the number of pool tables in your vicinity are bargirls. Interestingly enough, the number of both miserable and boastful expats who love to bitch acrimoniously and endlessly about "the fookin Thais" varies directly with the number of bargirls in both your and their vicinity as well.

The more pool tables and bargirls you avoid, the fewer miserable or boastful expats who love to bitch acrimoniously and endlessly about "the fookin Thais" you will encounter. It's SCIENCE!

[webfact]

4) I have seen a Thai person scream at someone for cutting them in line – frankly, if this happened more often the line cutting would stop.

What I have found usually works in this case is not screaming, but silently stepping just to their side and looking them directly in the face. Then they start the, "Oh, I'm sorry. Were you in line?" routine.

If its a Thai and you are able tell them this in Thai language do it! Most get petrified because you used their language... and they move at the end of the queue or even leave the building.

Edited April 3, 2009 by webfact

[Rainmon]

Cultural determinism; OP, Why are expecting civilized proper conversation and behavior in a place like that, it’s a bar with bar girls, drunks and burnt out whore mongers. These guys are probably all alcoholics, low on money bitter old farts that like to bitch and show off in front of newbies here, old story.

And regarding hhgz’s post about “Many of the farangs in BKK are only here because they've ran away from their responsibilities in their home country. “

I disagree that many farlang here have run away from their responsibilities, that is way too general of a statement. I know guys from the entire spectrum, multimillionaires that own businesses and hotels here and desperate crazy people that are broke living off credit cards and have stopped taking their medication. But yes this ain’t Florida with a large majority of retired well funded people on pensions. A large group of guys come to live here because it’s cheap with affordable health care, warm weather, beautiful women and a low crime rate. But I don’t believe it’s because they’re all on the run from their responsibilities, they just want a better life than what their home country has to offer.

Edited April 3, 2009 by Rainmon

[wackysleet]

Cultural determinism; OP, Why are expecting civilized proper conversation and behavior in a place like that, it’s a bar with bar girls, drunks and burnt out whore mongers. These guys are probably all alcoholics, low on money bitter old farts that like to bitch and show off in front of newbies here, old story.

And regarding hhgz’s post about “Many of the farangs in BKK are only here because they've ran away from their responsibilities in their home country. “

I disagree that many farlang here have run away from their responsibilities, that is way too general of a statement. I know guys from the entire spectrum, multimillionaires that own businesses and hotels here and desperate crazy people that are broke living off credit cards and have stopped taking their medication. But yes this ain’t Florida with a large majority of retired well funded people on pensions. A large group of guys come to live here because it’s cheap with affordable health care, warm weather, beautiful women and a low crime rate. But I don’t believe it’s because they’re all on the run from their responsibilities, they just want a better life than what their home country has to offer.

I've lived in the kingdom for twenty years now and ten of those in BKK where a large proportion of the falangs I met were miserable sods, a lot of them had marriages in England go pear shaped for one reason or another and had a reasonable payout from the divorce settlement most around 75,000 to a 100,00 pounds and at the rate it was a few years back appeared to them to represent paradise from what they had been told and heard from their single mates, so lets hit the bandwagon which a lot did but we all know that after feasting ones self on cheap booze and cheap woman it palls somewhat and unless you have taken the steps to ensure your future here your going to be up s--tcreek very soon and then you become what the OP is stating, a miserable complaining sod.

[MrHammer]

Like others have said, it comes down to why you are here and what you do with your time.

Many of those people probably come here for years and only stay in tourist areas where everybody is always smiling and treating them well, and then when they move here and meet regular thais they find that they are no longer king of the hill. Actually they may be met with racism, subttle or not, where they go. So they turn on the locals. Just like you see immigrants doing everywhere. In Europe its the arabs complaining about the godless locals, in the US the mexicans complain and complain about racism.

It takes hard work to reach the same social level in a foreign country, and some people are just not willing to do that.

[phetaroi]

Like others have said, it comes down to why you are here and what you do with your time.

Many of those people probably come here for years and only stay in tourist areas where everybody is always smiling and treating them well, and then when they move here and meet regular thais they find that they are no longer king of the hill. Actually they may be met with racism, subttle or not, where they go. So they turn on the locals. Just like you see immigrants doing everywhere. In Europe its the arabs complaining about the godless locals, in the US the mexicans complain and complain about racism.

It takes hard work to reach the same social level in a foreign country, and some people are just not willing to do that.

You are so right...it depends on what you do with your time...or perhaps with whom you spend your time. If you spend your time with people who see you as a dollar sign, you have put yourself in an inherently negative situation.

I actually think I have been treated better by Thai out of tourist areas. The only really negative behavior I have seen is in a few Chinese Buddhist temples.

[Electra]

Whatever one is looking for can generally be found in one's backyard. However, problems arise when expectations are raised simply because of a change in location and when these aren't met disillusion creeps in and attendant frustrations are inevitably expressed . Quite why folk think that their lives will change fundamentally just because the scenery is different is essentially a foible of human nature but probably constitutes a quest for contentment that of course is as illusory as the Holy Grail.

I have no such illusions but in Thailand I can quickly morph into the stereotypical whingeing farang when my own rather humble breakfast need is continually thwarted for reasons which defy any rational explanation. The problem? Why can't they fry a bloody egg right? No matter how I explain my preference for the white to be cooked but the yolk slightly runny it arrives either practically raw shimmering in its own opaque puddle or joke shop hard. Drives me quite beyond reason.