When i started dating my wife we were living in bkk and i remember one night we went to dinner and we were walking down the street hand in hand which in those days public display of affection was not always accepted. I asked her if she ever felt that people may look at her as a hooker. She looked me square in the eye and said: i know who i am. from that moment on i knew i had the right woman and it has never been an issue for me again. I am just wondering am i like most and if so why do some of the men still feal the need to define their mate?

I like alpha females, the sweet obliging type may cause a momentary sexual attraction but show me a woman who other women look up to and take notice of and I'm in love.

My Mrs is the youngest daughter in the family but, boy, when she speaks, everybody listens.

To all those ladies out there, love and respect yourself and I'll love you for it.

My Mrs is the youngest daughter in the family but, boy, when she speaks, everybody listens.

To all those ladies out there, love and respect yourself and I'll love you for it.

Ain't that [....self moderated....] a wild one.

My last job was running a military program in the Middle East. As a result of my position I was often invited to functions involving the US Ambassador, State Department, US Military and occasionally, the host country's Military.

My Thai wife was often included in these invitations so she was exposed to the same people I was. She handled herself with self confidence and grace and never came even close to committing a faux pas, whether it was at the US Ambassador's official residence, a July 4th party around the swimming pool at the US Military housing compound, or driving my golf cart at a US Military sponsored golf tournament.

Over the period of time I was there, we also had a number of Thai dinner parties at our residence and invited large numbers of US and host country Military officers to these functions. She was equally at ease whether the guest be an F-18 pilot, a Major General or a host country Rear Admiral.

In short, she is very secure in her own skin and it was a blessing to have her support there, and here.

Edit - Grammar correction

I think the problem guys our age have, Chuck, is not to sound patronising when we talk about women. But we are what we are, dinosaurs for want of a better word. We still open doors for the ladies and defer to them in all things that don't matter.

Fortunately there are still women around that like that because we ain't gonna change.

sceadugenga:

As long as she keeps bringing me breakfast in bed and ironing my underwear, I don't have a problem with keeping her around.

That doesn't sound too patronizing, does it?

Seriously, I am a gentleman when it comes to the ladies. I can be rather nasty with the male of the species but have a soft spot in my heart (head?) for the softer gender. That comes from being raised during the 50's.

My wife has been a good partner and I have rewarded her appropriately.

My wife has been a good partner and I have rewarded her appropriately.

Do you think you would have been able to reap the benefits to enable you to reward your wife, without her support?

Perhaps she should reward you for being such a hard working boy.

My wife has been a good partner and I have rewarded her appropriately.

Do you think you would have been able to reap the benefits to enable you to reward your wife, without her support?

Perhaps she should reward you for being such a hard working boy.

Come on moss, the guy clearly gives the girl a very good salary/allowance. 

Mossfin:

I am rewarded in many ways, as is she. Just as any farang wife is rewarded for faithful partnership in a marriage.

You and Moonraker seem to have a problem with this approach. Why is that?

It's been my experience that the marriages where BOTH spouses are secure in who they are, are the ones that last the longest, and with the fewest problems. If either partner is "needy" then it pulls down on the other and often ends in a breakup. A needy woman might initially be attractive for a man because it "might" make him feel more masculine, but eventually it will become a pain. Conversely, most women will eventually lose respect for a needy man.

It's been my experience that the marriages where BOTH spouses are secure in who they are, are the ones that last the longest, and with the fewest problems. If either partner is "needy" then it pulls down on the other and often ends in a breakup. A needy woman might initially be attractive for a man because it "might" make him feel more masculine, but eventually it will become a pain. Conversely, most women will eventually lose respect for a needy man.

Good post. Well said.

most women will eventually lose respect for a needy man.

I can verify that.

In your case it would be about what you needed them to do General...

A needy man has needs too.

Mossfin:

I am rewarded in many ways, as is she. Just as any farang wife is rewarded for faithful partnership in a marriage.

You and Moonraker seem to have a problem with this approach. Why is that?

It's that way that it seems to be quantified chuck, I have never quite been able to get my head around this. "Well I love my wife because I give her this much". If you loved her more would she get more? Or if you loved her less would she get less? Does she get more or less for being a good/naughty girl? What about bonuses? 

I give my wife everything that I have and in return she gives me everything that she has. There is no "mine" or "yours" in our relationship and I would have it no other way and if I was ever to offer my wife a salary then she'd likely slap me for treating her as a maid.

Mossfin:

I am rewarded in many ways, as is she. Just as any farang wife is rewarded for faithful partnership in a marriage.

You and Moonraker seem to have a problem with this approach. Why is that?

It's that way that it seems to be quantified chuck, I have never quite been able to get my head around this. "Well I love my wife because I give her this much". If you loved her more would she get more? Or if you loved her less would she get less? Does she get more or less for being a good/naughty girl? What about bonuses?

I give my wife everything that I have and in return she gives me everything that she has. There is no "mine" or "yours" in our relationship and I would have it no other way and if I was ever to offer my wife a salary then she'd likely slap me for treating her as a maid.

If she has access to all the cash now, you'd probably get a lot more than just a slap if you tried to downgrade her to a salary.

Mossfin:

I am rewarded in many ways, as is she. Just as any farang wife is rewarded for faithful partnership in a marriage.

You and Moonraker seem to have a problem with this approach. Why is that?

It's that way that it seems to be quantified chuck, I have never quite been able to get my head around this. "Well I love my wife because I give her this much". If you loved her more would she get more? Or if you loved her less would she get less? Does she get more or less for being a good/naughty girl? What about bonuses? 

I give my wife everything that I have and in return she gives me everything that she has. There is no "mine" or "yours" in our relationship and I would have it no other way and if I was ever to offer my wife a salary then she'd likely slap me for treating her as a maid.

Would you care to point out where I said... "Well I love my wife because I give her this much". Your interpretation of what my words say is hardly meaningful or accurate.

However, just to set the record straight....

1. The house outside Nong Bua Lamphu is in her name.

2. The family car is in her name.

3. Two motorcycles are in her name.

4. The savings account is in her name.

5. The 25 baht in gold is hers alone.

6. The house in Pattaya is in my daughter's name. Obtained prior to my current marriage.

7. The motorcycle in Pattaya is in my daughter's name.

8. The Suzuki Caribean is in MY name.

9. I give her about 80% of my monthly income to run the household and whatever else she might need it for.

The topic of this thread is how comfortable your wife is in being herself. I posted how my wife has progressed in self confidence and is a true partner to me. Somehow you found this offensive, seemingly because of what you THOUGHT I said.

I personally own one (1) Suzuki Caribean and three sets of golf clubs. Full stop.

I know a few "maids" that would like to be treated as harshly as you seem to think my wife has been.

A needy man has needs too.

And those we can pay for with no strings attached.

My wife has been a good partner and I have rewarded her appropriately.

it seems we are both lucky men Chuck when compared with the moaning and complaining one reads here so often.

So it seems, Naam.

My wife has been a good partner and I have rewarded her appropriately.

it seems we are both lucky men Chuck when compared with the moaning and complaining one reads here so often.

Anyone who loves their spouse likes to shower them with affection/attention in many ways...As I do also.

I think the terminology was just perhaps a poor choice of words.

Folks reward their pets when they are good.

I have never heard that term used when speaking of a loved one/spouse

Like moonraker said ....love is unconditional...at least I always thought so.

My wife has been a good partner and I have rewarded her appropriately.

it seems we are both lucky men Chuck when compared with the moaning and complaining one reads here so often.

Anyone who loves their spouse likes to shower them with affection/attention in many ways...As I do also.

I think the terminology was just perhaps a poor choice of words.

Folks reward their pets when they are good.

I have never heard that term used when speaking of a loved one/spouse

Like moonraker said ....love is unconditional...at least I always thought so.

Flying, your entire post is a poor choice of words, as was moonraker's.

Like moonraker said ....love is unconditional...at least I always thought so.

That may be true for small children, or animals like a pet dog, but with human adults it can fade, die or be killed by either partner by what they do.

Flying, your entire post is a poor choice of words, as was moonraker's.

Different strokes for different folks I guess

Like moonraker said ....love is unconditional...at least I always thought so.

That may be true for small children, or animals like a pet dog, but with human adults it can fade, die or be killed by either partner by what they do.

Goes without saying that mutual respect is a big part of it. But I would not limit that to adults as you say.

But yes anything can & does fade when things are destroyed....trust me I am old enough to know too

I wonder how the ladies on here would feel about being "rewarded appropriately" for being a good partner.

I wonder how the ladies on here would feel about being "rewarded appropriately" for being a good partner.

Why not get them to post and find out? My wife laughed when I passed on your thoughts.

You see, as the title of this thread and my original post on this thread denote, it is all about how your wife feels in her own skin. My wife is very comfortable with our relationship. Perhaps yours doesn't share that same confidence.

I know that we insult each other and fight like cats and dogs, but it seems to me that negative talk about someone's relationship with their spouse is going a bit too far.

My wife has been a good partner and I have rewarded her appropriately.

If you see nothing wrong with this statement, I see no point to carry on a constructive discourse.

There is no "mine" or "yours" in our relationship

For a Swindon bloke, there is great value in this statement.