Exercise and farting. One is men's business and the other is not. I bought an exercise bike on Saturday and while it is too soon to say for sure, since I have been pedalling and breaking a sweat, I have also been tooting with wild abandon. Not while pedalling but after when in bed. 3 to 5 second blasts. I shall report my findings after I have used the bike for another week or so. Coincidence or do I just have rotten guts?

Before you ask, my wife and I sleep in separate beds.

Exercise and farting. One is men's business and the other is not. I bought an exercise bike on Saturday and while it is too soon to say for sure, since I have been pedalling and breaking a sweat, I have also been tooting with wild abandon. Not while pedalling but after when in bed. 3 to 5 second blasts. I shall report my findings after I have used the bike for another week or so. Coincidence or do I just have rotten guts?

Before you ask, my wife and I sleep in separate beds.

A lot of old school Tour De-Frog types used to stick a banana up their bum whilst cycling. Not for the thrill of it all, but to help with the old saddle sores. I suggest you do the same, drink your milk before beddie byes and see if you can make a smoothie !!!!!

ANYWAY, this is turning into a suck hole thread I wanted to see secret mens business but it appears to be lost here, there hasnt even been any toilet humour or fart references for several hundred posts, No titty shots or revelations on how to go longer than 60 seconds. On the flip side, MR PENIS, the ultimate lover hasnt taken over either

Ok ND...here ya go.....

Wanking secrets;

1. Sit on your hand for 5 minutes beforehand so that it goes numb. It feels like it's someone else.

2. Use your left hand every now and then. The odd rythm makes it feel like someone else.

3. Sit on your left hand and then use your left hand....it REALLY feels like someone else.

ANYWAY, this is turning into a suck hole thread I wanted to see secret mens business but it appears to be lost here, there hasnt even been any toilet humour or fart references for several hundred posts, No titty shots or revelations on how to go longer than 60 seconds. On the flip side, MR PENIS, the ultimate lover hasnt taken over either

Ok ND...here ya go.....

Wanking secrets;

1. Sit on your hand for 5 minutes beforehand so that it goes numb. It feels like it's someone else.

2. Use your left hand every now and then. The odd rythm makes it feel like someone else.

3. Sit on your left hand and then use your left hand....it REALLY feels like someone else.

4. Employ someone else

ANYWAY, this is turning into a suck hole thread I wanted to see secret mens business but it appears to be lost here, there hasnt even been any toilet humour or fart references for several hundred posts, No titty shots or revelations on how to go longer than 60 seconds. On the flip side, MR PENIS, the ultimate lover hasnt taken over either

Ok ND...here ya go.....

Wanking secrets;

1. Sit on your hand for 5 minutes beforehand so that it goes numb. It feels like it's someone else.

2. Use your left hand every now and then. The odd rythm makes it feel like someone else.

3. Sit on your left hand and then use your left hand....it REALLY feels like someone else.

4. Employ someone else

ANYWAY, this is turning into a suck hole thread I wanted to see secret mens business but it appears to be lost here, there hasnt even been any toilet humour or fart references for several hundred posts, No titty shots or revelations on how to go longer than 60 seconds. On the flip side, MR PENIS, the ultimate lover hasnt taken over either

Ok ND...here ya go.....

Wanking secrets;

1. Sit on your hand for 5 minutes beforehand so that it goes numb. It feels like it's someone else.

2. Use your left hand every now and then. The odd rythm makes it feel like someone else.

3. Sit on your left hand and then use your left hand....it REALLY feels like someone else.

4. Employ someone else

Wow twice. A proper wanke_r.

I don't know a soul like those who appear on Jerry Springer so I think its a huge stretch to say that its the norm in the US and that is why Thailand is better.

Nobody said it was the norm in the USA. I said it HAD to be a staged performance because of the idiotic behaviour of the contestants. What I was referring to is it's a stupid show and compared it to stupid TV shows in Thailand... such as the three stooges type comedy shows in Thailand. Poor television is poor television no matter WHAT country it is shown in.

But, it wouldn't surprise me if there are people like those on the Jerry Springer show. Years ago when I was going to university I worked the Christmas holidays delivering mail. My beat was in the seedier part of the city. As an innocent 17 year old guy from a middle income family I was truly shocked by what I experienced on a daily basis in that part of town.

ANYWAY, this is turning into a suck hole thread I wanted to see secret mens business but it appears to be lost here, there hasnt even been any toilet humour or fart references for several hundred posts, No titty shots or revelations on how to go longer than 60 seconds. On the flip side, MR PENIS, the ultimate lover hasnt taken over either

Ok ND...here ya go.....

Wanking secrets;

1. Sit on your hand for 5 minutes beforehand so that it goes numb. It feels like it's someone else.

2. Use your left hand every now and then. The odd rythm makes it feel like someone else.

3. Sit on your left hand and then use your left hand....it REALLY feels like someone else.

I'm a bit suss about the sitting on the hand bit......do you always extend your middle finger & sit whilst nud_e as you suggested in your PM to me? Perhaps I should of responded via PM and not shared your secret with everyone???

I really didnt want to know about wanking, I was wondering about how many shakes qualifies as a wank?

ANYWAY, this is turning into a suck hole thread I wanted to see secret mens business but it appears to be lost here, there hasnt even been any toilet humour or fart references for several hundred posts, No titty shots or revelations on how to go longer than 60 seconds. On the flip side, MR PENIS, the ultimate lover hasnt taken over either

Ok ND...here ya go.....

Wanking secrets;

1. Sit on your hand for 5 minutes beforehand so that it goes numb. It feels like it's someone else.

2. Use your left hand every now and then. The odd rythm makes it feel like someone else.

3. Sit on your left hand and then use your left hand....it REALLY feels like someone else.

I'm a bit suss about the sitting on the hand bit......do you always extend your middle finger & sit whilst nud_e as you suggested in your PM to me? Perhaps I should of responded via PM and not shared your secret with everyone???

I really didnt want to know about wanking, I was wondering about how many shakes qualifies as a wank?

Arab jokes are racist !!

Years ago when I was going to university I worked the Christmas holidays delivering mail. My beat was in the seedier part of the city. As an innocent 17 year old guy from a middle income family I was truly shocked by what I experienced on a daily basis in that part of town.

Sounds like you were delivering something a 'little more' than mail Ian?

Of course I am sure you are familiar with what gay men refer to a 'beat' is...... . Perhaps you are coming out to us Ian?

ANYWAY, this is turning into a suck hole thread I wanted to see secret mens business but it appears to be lost here, there hasnt even been any toilet humour or fart references for several hundred posts, No titty shots or revelations on how to go longer than 60 seconds. On the flip side, MR PENIS, the ultimate lover hasnt taken over either

Ok ND...here ya go.....

Wanking secrets;

1. Sit on your hand for 5 minutes beforehand so that it goes numb. It feels like it's someone else.

2. Use your left hand every now and then. The odd rythm makes it feel like someone else.

3. Sit on your left hand and then use your left hand....it REALLY feels like someone else.

I'm a bit suss about the sitting on the hand bit......do you always extend your middle finger & sit whilst nud_e as you suggested in your PM to me? Perhaps I should of responded via PM and not shared your secret with everyone???

I really didnt want to know about wanking, I was wondering about how many shakes qualifies as a wank?

Arab jokes are racist !!

No, shake, not sheikh . Give yourself another uppercut

ANYWAY, this is turning into a suck hole thread I wanted to see secret mens business but it appears to be lost here, there hasnt even been any toilet humour or fart references for several hundred posts, No titty shots or revelations on how to go longer than 60 seconds. On the flip side, MR PENIS, the ultimate lover hasnt taken over either

Ok ND...here ya go.....

Wanking secrets;

1. Sit on your hand for 5 minutes beforehand so that it goes numb. It feels like it's someone else.

2. Use your left hand every now and then. The odd rythm makes it feel like someone else.

3. Sit on your left hand and then use your left hand....it REALLY feels like someone else.

4. Employ someone else

Are you available? Do you have a work permit for these activities? Do you come with references?

Ohhh that show with the old guy where everyone calls out Jerry - YUK, can't stand it. AND I agree with you SBK, those sort of trailer trash people only represent a small portion of any community, problem is that they are allowed to breed and those proportions always seem to grow, but that applies everywhere around the world.

Ian seems to fail to recognise that and they could run similar shows from Thailand as well.

You've met my neighbors?

YES, they spotted me in the garden.

Ohhh that show with the old guy where everyone calls out Jerry - YUK, can't stand it. AND I agree with you SBK, those sort of trailer trash people only represent a small portion of any community, problem is that they are allowed to breed and those proportions always seem to grow, but that applies everywhere around the world.

Ian seems to fail to recognise that and they could run similar shows from Thailand as well.

You've met my neighbors?

YES, they spotted me in the garden.

Wearing a green suit, red floppy hat and white beard - holding a fishing rod.

(Or is that Ian?)

Years ago when I was going to university I worked the Christmas holidays delivering mail. My beat was in the seedier part of the city. As an innocent 17 year old guy from a middle income family I was truly shocked by what I experienced on a daily basis in that part of town.

Sounds like you were delivering something a 'little more' than mail Ian?

Of course I am sure you are familiar with what gay men refer to a 'beat' is...... . Perhaps you are coming out to us Ian?

I USED to be happy and gay... and then I got married to my first wife. I didn't become happy again until after my second wife left. Now I'm just happy.

I'm not familiar with the term "beat" in regards to the gay community. But, a beat can be many things, such as... beat your wife,or, a policeman walks a beat, UK anglers fish a beat, and a mailman walks a beat... as in a route. And, yes, as a handsome young mailman I was surprised at some of the offers I got when delivering Christmas mail. Some women would intentionally wait for my arrival and greet me in a sheer nighty. I was too dumbfounded to do anything about it. Later, when I worked in isolated logging camps I bemoaned the chances I had passed up.

ANYWAY, this is turning into a suck hole thread I wanted to see secret mens business but it appears to be lost here, there hasnt even been any toilet humour or fart references for several hundred posts,

Quick, pull my finger.

I can see the point though, this thread does seem to be going down the pan

Then pull the chain. And Ian, to fit in with the favorite subject of some posters, there is also "beat the meat".

I really didnt want to know about wanking, I was wondering about how many shakes qualifies as a wank?

Arab jokes are racist !!

No, shake, not sheikh . Give yourself another uppercut

Cor.....An uppercut button

. And, yes, as a handsome young mailman I was

Ohhh Ian, its easy to see who your favourite & biggest fan is.

Perhaps you have failed to show us the 'hansum man' pics or maybe its just me, bald men were never my thing (I heard harcourt likes em tho)

I can see the point though, this thread does seem to be going down the pan

Yes and I can only ask you and the others to pick ur acts up a bit, be men and start discussing the issues.

see this is what happens when the sheilas stop visiting, we turn on ourselves fekkin sheilas, they are at the root of all our problems.

ANYWAY, this is turning into a suck hole thread I wanted to see secret mens business but it appears to be lost here, there hasnt even been any toilet humour or fart references for several hundred posts,

Quick, pull my finger.

Filthy baaastard, thats not a finger

I thought it was his lucky rabbit's foot.............

I thought it was his lucky rabbit's foot.............

must have been an infant rabbit

You know, I've always wondered why they call it a lucky rabbits foot ?

Which rabbit is f%^&ing lucky, trying to hop around with three feet ?

Oi ND.

It was cold, all right.

Oi.

It was cold, all right.

that didnt take much to drag you out of that hole, did it?

he who rakes the moon is always good for a bite

ps: it couldnt of possibly been cold, not with all that hand action you had going at the time

You know, I've always wondered why they call it a lucky rabbits foot ?

Which rabbit is f%^&ing lucky, trying to hop around with three feet ?

I'd struggle myself. Three foot would drain all the blood from my brain.

You know, I've always wondered why they call it a lucky rabbits foot ?

Which rabbit is f%^&ing lucky, trying to hop around with three feet ?

I'd struggle myself. Three foot would drain all the blood from my brain.

ohh by the sounds of things (according to mrs moonrakers) ur a long shot from 3 foot

. And, yes, as a handsome young mailman I was

Ohhh Ian, its easy to see who your favourite & biggest fan is.

Perhaps you have failed to show us the 'hansum man' pics or maybe its just me, bald men were never my thing (I heard harcourt likes em tho)

A long time ago, neverdie. This photo of me was taken about the same era. I had a full head of hair then.