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Obama Fires Cattle Guards, But Biden Saves Their Jobs!

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A few months ago, President Obama received and was reading a report that there were over 100,000 cattle guards in Colorado . The Colorado ranchers had protested his proposed changes in grazing policies, so he ordered the Secretary of the Interior to fire half of the cattle guards immediately!



For those of you who have never traveled to the west, or southwest, cattle guards are horizontal steel rails placed at fence openings, in dug-out places in the roads adjacent to highways (sometimes across highways), to prevent cattle from crossing over that area. For some reason the cattle will not step on the "guards," probably because they fear getting their feet caught between the rails.

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Before the Secretary of the Interior could respond and presumably try to straighten President Obama out on the matter, Vice-President Joe Biden, intervened with a request that...before any cattle guards were fired, they be given six months of retraining for Arizona border guards. 'Times are hard', said Joe Biden, 'it's only fair to the cattle guards and their families!'
these two guys are running our country, OMG!

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I'm surprised Obama didn't try to send in the US Marine "Corpse". B)

  • Author

He was probably concentrating on his cigar and got distracted.

What does Bill say to Hillary after sex?



--I'll be home in twenty minutes.

Why does Bill Clinton wear underwear?

--To keep his ankles warm.

Realization of from another White House intern . . .

--And all that time I thought that humming was the shredder!

Why was Monica Lewinsky in the White House after hours?

--Clinton was showing her the proper way to take "dic"tation.

What was President Clinton's explanation for having oral sex with Monica Lewinsky?

--"They told me she was the "head" intern!"

What's the recipe for Clinton stew?

--A small weenie in hot water.

What do Monica and Bill Clinon have most in common?

--They're both going down.

Someone ask Clinton if he was going back to Arkansas after this is all over.

--He said he thought he would stay in D.C. and poke around for a while.

http://www.everwonder.com/david/clintonphotos.html

clinton11.gif

Why does Bill drink so much coffee?

--He is required to "stay up" for many hours to satisfy the needs of his staff.

How did Clinton exercise his position as Commander-in-Chief?

--By barking out orders . . . like "Get Under the Desk!"

Don't feel sorry for Monica......

--She'll be back "on her knees" in no time!

Why did Bill get into this problem?

--He didn't know that harass was one word.

Clinton Presidential Anthem --

--Kneel to the Chief

What's the difference between Watergate and Zippergate?

--At least this time, there's no doubt about the identity of "Deep Throat."

Why did Monica Lewinsky accept an offer to work on the White House staff?

--She didn't understand know what STAFF he really meant.

Who's going to score first in the Super Bowl?

--The Denver Broncos or the Green Bay Packers? Bill Clinton

What's Hillary's new nickname for Bill's penis?

--"The Titanic" - because over 1500 interns went down on it.

What is Clinton's new Secret Service Code Name?

--Unibanger.

How does Hillary feel?

--She may be the FIRST LADY, but she won't be the LAST

What advice did Yasar Arafat give President Clinton in their meeting on January 22, 1998?

--"Bill....Goats don't talk!!"

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