Driving In Thailand...

[Pujun]

Bangkok is a horrible place to drive.

Can someone recommend a place near Bangkok that I can drive around for fun.

I don't have much chance to drive in the place where I live although I have a license. I really want to drive! Also please recommended a car rental for me (I can only handle automatic car).

Thanks

[richb2004]

Bangkok is a horrible place to drive.

Can someone recommend a place near Bangkok that I can drive around for fun.

I don't have much chance to drive in the place where I live although I have a license. I really want to drive! Also please recommended a car rental for me (I can only handle automatic car).

Thanks

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Germany.

About the closest place I know of where the people can drive.

[terdsak_12]

Thais aren't that bad on the whole, as long as you understand the rules of the road you'll be fine.

[richb2004]

Thais aren't that bad on the whole, as long as you understand the rules of the road you'll be fine.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Rules?

[terdsak_12]

The unwritten rules!!!

[richb2004]

The unwritten rules!!!   

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I see. Like 'do as you please, but once killed stop it'

[Kerryd]

Thai Driving Rules:

1) The bigger, more expensive car always has the right-of-way.

2) It is legal to drive on the wrong side of the road, or the wrong way down a one-way street if that is more convenient for you.

3) Motorcycle helmets are optional, except during the period when the police are doing the yearly crack-down.

4) The number of passengers on a motorcycle is only limited by the amount of space available to carry them.

5) If you are in an accident with a farang, it is the farangs fault.

6) If you are in an accident with another Thai driver, run away before the police come.

6a) If you are unable to run away for some reason, ensure the other driver is dead and blame the whole mess on him.

7) License, registration and insurance are all optional for Thai drivers. This makes it easier for them to run from the scene of an accident.

8)

9)

(carry on.......)

[penzman]

Thai Driving Rules:

1) The bigger, more expensive car always has the right-of-way.

2) It is legal to drive on the wrong side of the road, or the wrong way down a one-way street if that is more convenient for you.

3) Motorcycle helmets are optional, except during the period when the police are doing the yearly crack-down.

4) The number of passengers on a motorcycle is only limited by the amount of space available to carry them.

5) If you are in an accident with a farang, it is the farangs fault.

6) If you are in an accident with another Thai driver, run away before the police come.

         6a) If you are unable to run away for some reason, ensure the other driver is dead and blame the whole mess on him.

7) License, registration and insurance are all optional for Thai drivers. This makes it easier for them to run from the scene of an accident.

8)

9)

(carry on.......)

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

8- Even though you are 10 meters away from the next red traffic light or stop sign, you must get ahead of the only vehicle ahead of yours.

9- Whenever you turn on a main road from a secondary road, check your mirrors and see if there was any oncoming traffic. Now is also a good time to pick your nose or check on your make-up.

10- All truck drivers who used to play or dream of playing a wind instrument must modify the exhaust system so that it produces the sound of a tuba that can blow 120 decibels.

11- Never let the slower driver ahead of you politely move to the slower lane. You must dangerously use the slow lane to pass before he safely does.

12- Don't be a cheapo! Contribute, like all others, to the greenhouse effect by having your exhaust system spew out massive quantities of soot. This also allows people riding motorcycles to drive with one hand only while the other safely covers the mouth to block out toxic fumes down to 1 particle per million.

13- After pulling over to the side of the road, be sure to take off slowly ( 30 km per hour is recommended) and hesitate for 113 meters while hogging two lanes.

14- On all highways: The faster you go, the closer you must be to the vehicle ahead.

15- Clockwise or counter clockwise will do fine at any intersection.

16- In a heavy downpour, DO NOT turn on your headlights, save them for evenings only.

17- The more people sit in the back of your truck, the faster you must go in order to keep them cool.

18- Don't be alarmed by the siren of the ambulance boxed in the traffic behind you, stay calm and still. ( I really saw this one where the ambulance could not move at all for 20 minutes and some poor guy was having the sh*t beat out of his chest).

[corkscrew]

Thais aren't that bad on the whole, as long as you understand the rules of the road you'll be fine.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Rules?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Suggested rules.

[corkscrew]

Thai Driving Rules:

1) The bigger, more expensive car always has the right-of-way.

2) It is legal to drive on the wrong side of the road, or the wrong way down a one-way street if that is more convenient for you.

3) Motorcycle helmets are optional, except during the period when the police are doing the yearly crack-down.

4) The number of passengers on a motorcycle is only limited by the amount of space available to carry them.

5) If you are in an accident with a farang, it is the farangs fault.

6) If you are in an accident with another Thai driver, run away before the police come.

         6a) If you are unable to run away for some reason, ensure the other driver is dead and blame the whole mess on him.

7) License, registration and insurance are all optional for Thai drivers. This makes it easier for them to run from the scene of an accident.

8)

9)

(carry on.......)

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

8- Even though you are 10 meters away from the next red traffic light or stop sign, you must get ahead of the only vehicle ahead of yours.

9- Whenever you turn on a main road from a secondary road, check your mirrors and see if there was any oncoming traffic. Now is also a good time to pick your nose or check on your make-up.

10- All truck drivers who used to play or dream of playing a wind instrument must modify the exhaust system so that it produces the sound of a tuba that can blow 120 decibels.

11- Never let the slower driver ahead of you politely move to the slower lane. You must dangerously use the slow lane to pass before he safely does.

12- Don't be a cheapo! Contribute, like all others, to the greenhouse effect by having your exhaust system spew out massive quantities of soot. This also allows people riding motorcycles to drive with one hand only while the other safely covers the mouth to block out toxic fumes down to 1 particle per million.

13- After pulling over to the side of the road, be sure to take off slowly ( 30 km per hour is recommended) and hesitate for 113 meters while hogging two lanes.

14- On all highways: The faster you go, the closer you must be to the vehicle ahead.

15- Clockwise or counter clockwise will do fine at any intersection.

16- In a heavy downpour, DO NOT turn on your headlights, save them for evenings only.

17- The more people sit in the back of your truck, the faster you must go in order to keep them cool.

18- Don't be alarmed by the siren of the ambulance boxed in the traffic behind you, stay calm and still. ( I really saw this one where the ambulance could not move at all for 20 minutes and some poor guy was having the sh*t beat out of his chest).

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That is so funny...and true!!!

[samran]

Wusses..

BKK is easy to drive in. I've had a harder time in London.

[buadhai]

19 - Yellow light means five more cars. Red light means three more cars.

[peter_griffin]

20 - After inserting key into ignition and starting the engine, insert either forefinger in nose after gluing mobile phone to ear.

Edited October 5, 2005 by peter_griffin

[Nam Kao]

21) Short of cash, crash into a falang and get money every time.

[LivinLOS]

22) The indicators on motorcycles are there to tell you which direction the bike has just come from not the direction it is intending to take..

23) Right of way is established in a 'scissors paper stone' hierachy where motorrbiokes trump pushbikes, cars trump motorbikes, pickups trump cars, and lorries trump pickups.. Mercedes obviously trumps everything except for drunk lorries.

[Jai Dee]

The following is a “reference” to Thai road rules. I have no idea who wrote it or indeed where I picked it up so if anyone reading it is the author please let me know so you can be credited with the composition. While it has its fun side I am sure that some long term residents will have experienced or at least witnessed most of its content.

RULES OF THE ROAD IN THAILAND

In order to successfully drive a motor vehicle in Thailand you must understand the transportation gestalt in an entirely different way. Definitions which you once thought were above definition will be immediately re-defined.

Please note the following:

THE ROAD

The road includes not only the paved portion of the highway, but also what we might call the verge, the curb, the sidewalk, the front yard, the roadside footstalls and the Wat. The paved portion of the roadway is generally one lane wide. Not one lane wide in each direction – just one lane.

ROAD MARKINGS

These colorful white and yellow lines mark the center of the lanes and are especially useful on dark and rainy nights.

PASSING OR OVERTAKING

Passing or overtaking is the national pastime in Thailand. Observant motorists among you may have encountered the following:

1. The Vertical Triple Maneuver

The act of passing three vehicles in one accelerated movement.

2. The Horizontal Triple Maneuver

The act of passing a vehicle that in itself is in the act of passing another vehicle.

3. The Double, Double Maneuver

The act of passing a vehicle at precisely the same time that another vehicle, coming from the opposite direction, is also engaged in the act of passing.

TAILGATING

Tailgating is what you do when not overtaking.

BEING OVERTAKEN

The act of being overtaken is an insult not to be endured. The greater the differential between the vehicle being passed (BMW) and the passing vehicle (pickup or a low ranking saloon) the greater the potential loss of prestige and face. The owner of the more expensive vehicle must always do everything possible to thwart the attempt of the less expensive vehicle attempting to overtake.

HEADLIGHTS

Rapidly flashing headlights can mean anything including but not limited to the following:

• OK to pass now.

• Do not pass now

• Get out of my way

• Help, I am in trouble

It takes years or sometimes an entire lifetime to learn this subtle, intriguing, and non-verbal communication skill. Generally however, you have three seconds

THE HORN

When sounded loudly and frequently, the horn sets up an invisible energy barrier protecting the vehicle and its passengers from all harm. The faster the vehicle is traveling, the better the horn works.

SEAT BELTS

Not only are seatbelts not worn, seatbelts are absolutely unnecessary. Driver and passengers are protected by the horn.

HAZARDS

Motorcycles will appear from nowhere and are to be treated with absolute and complete disregard. Animals on the other hand must be treated with great respect. It is presumed that highly evolved creatures like water buffalos, prized bulls, cows, chickens and ducks know how to sidestep a modern vehicle travelling at 150 Km. per hour on a rain slicked road. Dogs born in Thailand on the other hand possess an inbred instinct to leap in front of a speeding vehicle.

ACCIDENTS

Accidents are rare in Thailand and are usually the result of a malfunctioning horn. Be aware that most heavy vehicle drivers if involved in a serious accident will immediately leave the scene of and run to the nearest police station to inform them of the accident. This age old practice is commonly known as “fleeing the scene”

LIGHTS

Lights on vehicles are not needed especially at night as they are a drain on the battery. The larger the vehicle (10 wheeled truck, bus, etc.) the less need for illuminating it. Motorcycle riders are presumed to have 20/20 vision in the dark and are immune to all other traffic on the road. If lights are used however, at least one headlight must be pointing in the air. This will ensure that low flying aircraft are detected and will have the added advantage of blinding on-coming drivers.

INSURANCE

It is recommended that others purchase insurance. This will ensure that any foreigner involved in an accident will be in a position to take the blame and let the insurance company pay for any damage to both vehicles as well as all hospital bills.

[pnustedt]

24. TRAFFIC LIGHTS

It is OK to filter left at red traffic lights. Actually, it's OK to filter right too but you need to drive up the cycle lane on the right side of the road until you can get across the traffic and central reservation to the left hand side.

[monsieurhappy]

Always remember "TIREDNESS KILLS!!" so if you are feeling the effects of a long journey and need a break - stop at the first traffic lights you come to that are on GREEN and take a nap. You might find this area a little full, but don't worry, as soon as the lights change to red you will have the place all to yourself.

[terdsak_12]

I don't even blink these days when a tour bus overtakes me doing 160KPH!!!

[Neeranam]

There seem to be different rules for different vehicles. The bus gets right of way, as does a lorry. More and more though there are pick-up trucks thinking that they have some kind of right of way over a car. Bloody dangerous, inconsiderate, ego-maniac, macho drivers. Usually 5'6" with a cowboy hat!

Edited October 5, 2005 by Neeranam

[buadhai]

Thanks to Jai Dee for that wonderful post. Says it all.

Bloody dangerous, inconsiderate, ego-maniac, macho drivers.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Fortunately, they are quite predictable.

When I first started to drive here I decided I'd try and compete. Ms. Buadhai finally set me straight: "What is this? You're 56 and driving like you're 25!"

So, now I get in one lane, keep a decent gap between me and the vehicle in front, laugh off the intrusions into "my" space and get there just as quickly as I would if I were playing cowboy too.