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Marrying Bar Girls


the gentleman

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This is a question, I am not trying to insult anybody with this. - lets be clear.

99% of my "mates" are married to bargirls, some have been for a long time and some in the last few years.

The winges I get from my mates are, she takes money, spends money, talks about money, have to give money to parents/family etc.

If you meet with them they have nothing intelligent to say, it usually "bar talk", or wanting to know how much your worth and what material possesions you've got.

What do guys have in common with them, what do you talk about, do you really think she is there for you?

I, as most of you guys who have been here a while, know some girls with up to 4 to 5 blokes from different countries all sending money and she is promising all of them undying love - what is different about your wife/girlfriend?

It sounds like a generalisation and it is meant to as generally they are all the same.

I suppose it comes down to this, other than cheap/free sex without having to do the romance thing, what attracts you to them?

Would you marry a prostitute in your own country?

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This was going to be my next thread hmmmm

little jimmy goes to bkk meets his wife to be from the cave, takes her back to aussie land and introduces her to mom and dad,mom says so this is your new wife, so what job did she have in thailand,little jimmy mumbles something and creeps away.

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From the very nature of the profession, I would be surprised if any bar girl could genuinly fall in love and stay in love. I once met an American, at Poi Pet, with his half Thai daughter. He explained to me that he had married a bar girl, and that she just kept chasing the money and ended up leaving him with the child to look after. So many sad stories.

Why marry a bar girl, when there are so many lovely Thai women, who are not in the profession?

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I suppose it comes down to this, other than cheap/free sex without having to do the romance thing, what attracts you to them?

I cant see that any true analysis would come up with free or cheap sex as a reason.

I'm sure that if you just worked it out mathematically it would be cheaper to continue bedding BGs, as soon as you've been with one long enough for her to expect a trip to the gold shop, then drop her like a hot potato and get a new one.

But I would guess that "without having to do the romance thing" might be a good reason.

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I am a prostitute at work. Many times I have been ****ed and never got paid extra.

It does not give me much to talk about either. Whats up with us prostitutes?

I don't think it's the nature of the work that's really the issue, I'm quite willing to accept that many of us are ######ed over in some way and we accept it because we need the money.

However I think the issue is more that people are marrying girls who are vastly less educated and (dare I say it.. ok but don't hit me on the head with it) lower class than they are. I think you get the same issues when marrying a farm girl or ex-farm-girl waitress or someone of a similar level.

The simple answer is of course that Thai women who are sucessful and educated may have some requirements of their own for their future husband beyond having a pulse and sufficient funds to provide some inheritance soonest..

Cheers,

Chanchao

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I agree there are differences, but the essence is if you were back in Falang-Land would you marry a prostitute or encourage any of your friends to marry a prositiute.

If you say yes then there is no problem.

and of course "She is not the same as all the others".

Personally I did not marry a bar girl, I don't like the sub-culture and the silent code they tend to keep.

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I simply can't believe the topic at all - marrying bar girls, aka prostitutes???

Is this some kind of ego-stroking for overweight caucasian losers? A woman half your age with copious amounts of tatoos tell you you're handsome, gorgeous, sooooo big and a fantastic lover - and you fall for it hook, line and sinker.

More power to them, I say. Anyone stupid enough to get into that situation deserves all they get.

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The simple answer is of course that Thai women who are sucessful and educated may have some requirements of their own for their future husband beyond having a pulse and sufficient funds to provide some inheritance soonest..

By George, I think he's got it...

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Another point might be - well if you marry a Bar Girl form LOS ot Philippines or Russia or wherever, at least they should know what a man likes....

After all in such a caring relationship like that, you would then ask the question - "how do you give a woman a great orgasm......?

Answer - "Who cares"

Well it will be experiance that makes the difference.

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Birds of a feather flock together,,So if you only see whores,your choices are very limited.

I have never seen a lasting relationship where a guy married a bargirl and it lasted very long,,they seem to think that farang are made of money and have an unlimited supply,then when married and return to your home country,and you go back to work to pay for the trip and save for the next one,the honeymoon is over.

They tend to spend money the same way that they did and there is nothing you can do about it. You can't teach an old dog new tricks.

As they only see guys with their heads up their ass and a belly full of beer acting like the worlds last big spender,what do you expect them to think.

I know guys that have married Viet Nam,Korean,Chinese,Jap,filipine or what ever and it is all the same. They still spend as if the next live one was comin thru the door.

and there is always plenty of good girls around,but you can't find them if you only hang around bars,drunk on your ass, You have to get out and look.

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The old adage:

You get what you pay for

springs to mind.

Mind you, looking at the pathetic excuses for western men that are all too common in Thailand, it is no surprise that they can pnly communicate with bargirls and have forgotten what it's like to actually grow a mature relationship.

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Would you marry a prostitute in your own country?

My ex-wife in the UK turned out to be a prostitute! I divorced her after she had a series of extra-marital relationships.

I subsequently married a Thai girl that I met in a bar (many of my mates are also in long term relationships with girls they met in a bar). She is more intelligent than me (I don't confuse intelligence with education) and is better at handling and saving money. She does, and always has, unselfishly supported her family to a large extent. She is a similar age to my ex-wife (2 yrs younger than me) but we communicate better despite language and cultural differences.

One of the most important things to me in our relationship is trust, and I have every confidence that my wife would not betray this. Any other problems can be worked out.

I don't have any statistics but, from what I see, the success rate of marriages between farangs and girls they have met in a bar is on a par with more conventional marriages in the west.

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"I don't have any statistics but, from what I see, the success rate of marriages between farangs and girls they have met in a bar is on a par with more conventional marriages in the west. "

pnusted, if you don't have access to stats, I believe they would be hard to come by anyway, how can you make that statement.

Thank your lucky stars that for you it has worked out, but don't judge all relationships by your bad experience in the UK.

Somehow I doubt anyone could argue, en gros, that marriage to bar girls or prostitutes constitutes a safe and reliable relationship.

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Well Sling you make a good point about making statements, but pnusted is making comments based on his life experience

Your comment though is equally baseless,

Somehow I doubt anyone could argue, en gros, that marriage to bar girls or prostitutes constitutes a safe and reliable relationship.

Without statistics arguments, either pro or con are eqully without foundation.

regards :o

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and there is always plenty of good girls around,but you can't find them if you only hang around bars,drunk on your ass, You have to get out and look.

absolutely correct

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I think the conditioning received from working bar can result in the BG seeing relationships as essentially transactional. The relationship between punter and BG is basically mutually exploitative and that is a very sandy foundation upon which to build anything lasting. That's not to say that it can't and hasn't worked but I think the odds going in are pretty steep.

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I once had a girl

or should i say

she once had me

she showed me her room

isn't it good in Patpong road ?

She asked me to stay

and she told to sit anywhere

so i kooked around

and i noticed

there wasn't a chair

I sat on a rug

biding my time

drinking rice wine

we talked until 2

then Taksin said

It's time to bed

(lennon/Mc Cartney/Pepe)

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I think, there are different kind of bargirls. The first category is there for money and if they marry or not, it is always about money. The second kind is there for finding a mate. They often don't work the bar very long, get taken out and married. I know at least 3 long term relationships including my own that worked out. The problems these couples face are the normal relationships problems like everywhere.

My girl worked at the bar for 3 weeks. She is not educated but intelligent, great cook, very disciplined. We take the girls from bars, because they are the easiest available and easiest to 'test drive'. It is not so much a question of the bar, more about the mindset. I will marry her soon, but is is more than 4.5 years we have been together.

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I feel essentially there will always be a battle going on between those that would/do and those who wouldn't/don't.

Last year I went to a wedding between the girl from Heaven and my mate.

I was a bit antsy about her for a long time, and though they have the odd disagreement, essentially they get on well. Age difference is roughly 40 years. I don't know how long it will last, and essentially, I don't care, but I have to say he is the happiest 60 year old I know with one exception.

Generalizations appear to be based on the individuals life experience, which makes a gang of sense, but relationships are IMHO the hardest thing in the world, to categorize.

Good luck if you have one, good luck finding one if you need one. If you neither want nor need, good luck to you as well.

To the Pommie on the plane from Bangkok to Chiang Mai last Sunday, with the 15 year old (almost maybe) on your left arm, you are a fool. I suspect you won't be reading this but believe me, I hope the 2 girls take you for every single baht you have for your holiday. Also, remember to look at the card and take 541 off the big number..

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I think this thread is a good one cos my wife is aslo a whore. I know a lot of my mates laught at me cos of this but I don't care.

Personally, I think a lot of peope are just jealous. After all, how many blokes who've married "normal" girls can say that their wives have taken it up the Gary Glitter from Africans, given head to Indians and done hand jobs on cripples.

My wife's done all of this and more, and I'm proud of her for it.

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