Advice Needed Please.

[nev]

well on my last trip to thailand i met this wonderfull girl and yes it was in a bar,but!!

first of all she does not come across as a bar girl in fact i would say she is not a bar girl.

she is only 21,doesnt drink,does not work night shift as she hates loud music,she has perfect english,in fact she is studying social sciences at uni and has decided to do bar work while she waits to go back to uni.

well i am normally a big butterfly but this trip i took this one for 17 days,she had only been in the bar 17 days and she told me she had 2 falang before me.

she is back home now has her sister is visiting from america and her sis does'nt no she has been working the bar.

well i have v ery strong feelings for this one and have told her if she gets a good job or go back to uni or go dance in a show she has been asked to dance in i will help her out with some money,ok flame me,,but i honestly think this one is worth it,she has not trait's of a bar girl in fact she cannot stay awake past midnight,and a lot of nights we where in bed for midnight,very unusual for me as i normally party everynight,but all is good as the sex was the best i have ever had.

so i want honest answers what are my chances of success and am i doing the right thing taking this girl from the bar and forming a relationship with?

nev

[bkkmadness]

I mean really, what advice do you think we can honestly give you. We dont know the girl or you.

Why dont you grow up and just try it and see what happens. You do know this is the internet right, that we are a bunch of strangers that dont know you from Adam? Dont wanna sound harsh, but come on, just try it with her.

It goes wrong, so what, it goes right well done.

If we all tell you not to go out with her will you call her up and tell her "Sorry I cant see you anymore these guys on the internet told me not to"

and since you asked for a flame:

she has not trait's of a bar girl in fact she cannot stay awake past midnight,and a lot of nights we where in bed for midnight

no traits cept she works in a bar and you took her out of it for a shag for 17 days. Was it free?

And what does it matter if she is a bargirl, many people on here have ex bargirls as wives and happily married.

How old are you dude, 13?

[nev]

I mean really, what advice do you think we can honestly give you.  We dont know the girl or you.

  Why dont you grow up and just try it and see what happens.  You do know this is the internet right, that we are a bunch of strangers that dont know you from Adam?  Dont wanna sound harsh, but come on, just try it with her.

It goes wrong, so what, it goes right well done. 

If we all tell you not to go out with her will you call her up and tell her "Sorry I cant see you anymore these guys on the internet told me not to" 

and since you asked for a flame:

she has not trait's of a bar girl in fact she cannot stay awake past midnight,and a lot of nights we where in bed for midnight

no traits cept she works in a bar and you took her out of it for a shag for 17 days. Was it free?

And what does it matter if she is a bargirl, many people on here have ex bargirls as wives and happily married.

How old are you dude, 13?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

good honest reply,i no i dont no you from adam but your feed back is apreciated.

i should have stated i am twice her age.

[bkkmadness]

You know man, it dont matter if your twice her age. How can anyone make a judgement on whether this will work or not, and anybody who thinks they can is a fool. And will you follow advice giving to you here? I wouldn't.

You know its like any relationship in the world, whether she likes loud music and goes to bed at midnight or not, I'm afraid your just gonna have to try it out.

So you either waste some time and have some fun, or maybe meet your future wife and mother of your kids. Who knows, thats the magic and the curse of meeting a new girl right?

Or should we all start giving you percentages on sucess based on the info provided and you either dump her or marry her according to that?

[nev]

I mean really, what advice do you think we can honestly give you.  We dont know the girl or you.

  Why dont you grow up and just try it and see what happens.  You do know this is the internet right, that we are a bunch of strangers that dont know you from Adam?  Dont wanna sound harsh, but come on, just try it with her.

It goes wrong, so what, it goes right well done. 

If we all tell you not to go out with her will you call her up and tell her "Sorry I cant see you anymore these guys on the internet told me not to"  

and since you asked for a flame:

she has not trait's of a bar girl in fact she cannot stay awake past midnight,and a lot of nights we where in bed for midnight

no traits cept she works in a bar and you took her out of it for a shag for 17 days. Was it free?

And what does it matter if she is a bargirl, many people on here have ex bargirls as wives and happily married.

How old are you dude, 13?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

good honest reply,i no i dont no you from adam but your feed back is apreciated.

i should have stated i am twice her age.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

sorry i should add no she wasn't free but as she didn't drink saved me heap's and the early night saved me heap's,and another thing to add i went soi buhkao markets with her and she never asked for me to buy her anything i even offered too,,now that was a first too

[bkkmadness]

sorry i should add no she wasn't free but as she didn't drink saved me heap's and the early night saved me heap's,and another thing to add i went soi buhkao markets with her and she never asked for me to buy her anything i even offered too,,now that was a first too cool.gif

ah right, well I didnt know that, marry her then!!

[Tywais]

Even if she is the greatest girl you ever met it sounds like a good guess that you may very well tire of her and dump her leaving her in a bind and setting her to thinking that farangs are pr!cks. My reason for saying this is you admit to being a butterfly and as such the 'grass is always greener'. Just be carefull and don't build her up only to break her heart (and even bar girls can get broken hearted from a John with sometimes catestrophic results).

But as bkkmadness said, it's up to you. Oh, and you are guaranteed to get some pretty terse comments here.

[nev]

Even if she is the greatest girl you ever met it sounds like a good guess that you may very well tire of her and dump her leaving her in a bind and setting her to thinking that farangs are pr!cks. My reason for saying this is you admit to being a butterfly and as such the 'grass is always greener'.  Just be carefull and don't build her up only to break her heart (and even bar girls can get broken hearted from a John with sometimes catestrophic results).

But as bkkmadness said, it's up to you.  Oh, and you are guaranteed to get some pretty terse comments here.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

very good advice mate,i will tread very carefully and i am not a ###### and i will treat her well,,thanks mate.

[expatinasia]

"she wasn't free"

OK, so she is a prostitute. You can avoid the label "bar girl" from now until hel_l freezes over. But, she jumped into the sack with you, and you paid for sex. She sounds like a real princess.

[bkkmadness]

"she wasn't free"

OK, so she is a prostitute.  You can avoid the label "bar girl" from now until hel_l freezes over.  But, she jumped into the sack with you, and you paid for sex.  She sounds like a real princess.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

and heres come all the sh1t.

[Turok]

Nev:

Advice-

PAck it in and run as far as possible. This girl is working it and you are falling for it. She playing the inexperienced just starting working in bar gig. Find, F&^k, and Forget is my motto. 17 days and u are already to marry. Are you ready to spend the rest of your life with this bar ho? Do not waste anymore time with this bar girl. She works in the bar---She is a bar ho. You mean nothing to her. And u need to be thinking that this girl means nothing to you other than another piece of a%^! You are not the first guy who will get into this situation. Nor will u be the last. Save Yourself!!!

Turok

[bkkmadness]

And many a guy on this forum has married and live quite happily now with their ex 'bar hos'. In fact a lot of guys in Thailand have in general.

Edited December 6, 2005 by bkkmadness

[Tywais]

"she wasn't free"

OK, so she is a prostitute.  You can avoid the label "bar girl" from now until hel_l freezes over.  But, she jumped into the sack with you, and you paid for sex.  She sounds like a real princess.

and heres come all the sh1t.

Yep, right on schedule.

[zzap]

if she gets a good job or go back to uni or go dance in a show she has been asked to dance in i will help her out with some money,ok flame me,,but i honestly think this one is worth it,

CLASSIC! You're not the only nor first one who's been there.

Sorry...

Go for it, if you are staying in Thailand with her, if you plan to conduct the relationship by wiring money and getting nice e-mails in return, forget it, better stay friends for now and still receive nice e-mails.

[bkkmadness]

Go for it, if you are staying in Thailand with her, if you plan to conduct the relationship by wiring money and getting nice e-mails in return, forget it

Yeah, gotta be said, that is a mugs game, sending cash over to a girl you just met just coz she tells you shes out of the bar.

If involving you sending cash over, be very careful you don't get mugged, like loads of guys do everyday.

Though I still state, no one can say whether this relationship be a sucess or not.

[britmaveric]

Everything is not what it seems. Be careful and cautious - don't send any dosh for god sake. If you aren't in Thailand to keep an eye on things then you might as well pack it in and just be mates because she prob has another lad. I've had a few mates give me this line and I literally slapped them in the back of the head "....but she's different and not like the other ones." Sadly its ends up the same everytime.

Way I look at it you have options:

1. Move Thailand - problem solved

2. Move her to where you live (marriage) - problem solved

3. Chalk it up to a nice time, see her on holiday and no strings

4. Send her dosh, act like she is your gf and pray for a miracle

Option 3 is my recommendation, but there is always a chance we are wrong, but the odds that we are right are clearly in our favour.

Goodluck Nev - I wish you the best mate.

Edited December 6, 2005 by britmaveric

[gburns57au]

many a good relationship can be had with a BG....but just be wary,

I met my girl in a bar and she was working daytime too...she didnt give me the usual BS when I first met her, so that took my interest but it still took another 9 months before we declared a relationship, she had already quit the bar scene by this time. So far everything she has said has been genuine, I have spoken to her parents via the internet, her Mum is married to a farang, I have met all her close family in Thailand. After I had known her for 18 months I brought her to Oz for a 2 month holiday and we are doing ok. She is still staying in Bangkok with her sister and her son and I am looking after her. Hope to bring her back again in a few months for a longer stay and if we are still going ok, then I will look at taking the next step.

My point is...take it slowly!!!...if it is right you will find out, My concern is the ages....my girl is 31 and I am 48...big difference in years but not such a big difference in attitude. In your situation with her being 21yo and your goodself 42 you may find that she doesnt see things the same way as you do, She is still looking for adventure and partying where as you may be looking to settle down, she is still quite a young girl in comparison.

In the end tho it is up to you, you will read the advice here and either you will accept or reject it. In the end what you do is your own decision, no amount of advice here will change your mind.

[TizMe]

well on my last trip to thailand i met this wonderfull girl and yes it was in a bar,but!!

I couldn't be bothered reading the rest of the thread. Just send her all your money and she will "love you long time"

[sonthaya]

Now on the positive side, it could work out to a lasting relationship, I have now been married for 12 years to a ex BG, and it has been 12 good years.

[zzap]

Well, yes. But did you feel obliged to sponsor her working in a "dance show" shortly after you met her, while you weren't even in the country?

Didn't think so...

Lucky you.

[mrbojangles]

Come on Guys. There is only one reason why someone would post this question in the "Farang Pub- Fun, Entertainment" forum.

Nev, i am surprised at you

[Joey Boy]

well on my last trip to thailand i met this wonderfull girl and yes it was in a bar,but!!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I couldn't be bothered reading the rest of the thread. Just send her all your money and she will "love you long time"

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

and tell u that u are "good man, good heart".. Even though she'll be gettin hammered for a few baht every night by any punter who takes an interest in her

[Glauka]

I don´t know If we will have a second life...

that´s why I try to live mine as fullfilling as possible...

This girl is maybe lying to you...but you don´t know yet...

If I were you I will try to see what happen...

in the future you may find out that she was lying to you...well if that´s so you will just have lost some time & money and ilusion...

But you will recover...

However if you don´t try... some day in the future you may wake up and ask yourself..."what if"...I think this is even worse that the above losses mentioned two sentences up...

This is my opinion...

[meom]

well on my last trip to thailand i met this wonderfull girl and yes it was in a bar,but!!

I couldn't be bothered reading the rest of the thread. Just send her all your money and she will "love you long time"

and tell u that u are "good man, good heart".. Even though she'll be gettin hammered for a few baht every night by any punter who takes an interest in her

Provided they're not bare back riders he still has an added advantage

[Glauka]

I forgotten to add...

you can read my own experience in Ladies in Thailand forum

" Topic: can someone remind me..."

[zzap]

well on my last trip to thailand i met this wonderfull girl and yes it was in a bar,but!!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I couldn't be bothered reading the rest of the thread. Just send her all your money and she will "love you long time"

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

and tell u that u are "good man, good heart".. Even though she'll be gettin hammered for a few baht every night by any punter who takes an interest in her

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

No, this one is different from the rest, believe me.

[Mighty Mouse]

she is back home now has her sister is visiting from america and her sis does'nt no she has been working the bar.

She is deceiving her own sister, but she is honest and truthful to you. Hmmmmmmm!

Finding the right girl in life is like picking a sweet orange from the barrel, you gotta suck it and see.

Just because she is selling pussy to you, and the others before (and after) you, doesn't mean that she would not make a good long term girlfriend/wife.

It does mean that you need to spend a lot of quality time together to gauge your true feelings for each other.

..........and as other posters have suggested in this topic, DO NOT send her money. If she calls you a 'cheap charlie' because of your closed wallet policy, keep on walking.

[MilkPlus]

invest in your future.

http://cgi.ebay.com/PSE-2000-Lie-Detector-...4QQcmdZViewItem

[jrincon17]

she is back home now has her sister is visiting from america and her sis does'nt no she has been working the bar.

She is deceiving her own sister, but she is honest and truthful to you. Hmmmmmmm!

Finding the right girl in life is like picking a sweet orange from the barrel, you gotta suck it and see.

Just because she is selling pussy to you, and the others before (and after) you, doesn't mean that she would not make a good long term girlfriend/wife.

It does mean that you need to spend a lot of quality time together to gauge your true feelings for each other.

..........and as other posters have suggested in this topic, DO NOT send her money. If she calls you a 'cheap charlie' because of your closed wallet policy, keep on walking.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Also she was in bed by midnight must be narcoleptic

[DJ Pat]

well on my last trip to thailand i met this wonderfull girl and yes it was in a bar,but!!

first of all she does not come across as a bar girl in fact i would say she is not a bar girl.

she is only 21,doesnt drink,does not work night shift as she hates loud music,she has perfect english,in fact she is studying social sciences at uni and has decided to do bar work while she waits to go back to uni.

well i am normally a big butterfly but this trip i took this one for 17 days,she had only been in the bar 17 days and she told me she had 2 falang before me.

she is back home now has her sister is visiting from america and her sis does'nt no she has been working the bar.

well i have v ery strong feelings for this one and have told her if she gets a good job or go back to uni or go dance in a show she has been asked to dance in i will help her out with some money,ok flame me,,but i honestly think this one is worth it,she has not trait's of a bar girl in fact she cannot stay awake past midnight,and a lot of nights we where in bed for midnight,very unusual for me as i normally party everynight,but all is good as the sex was the best i have ever had.

so i want honest answers what are my chances of success and am i doing the right thing taking this girl from the bar and forming a relationship with?

nev

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Try asking on bangkok tonight.com, they'll give you some valuable answers.