LETTER FROM A BAR GIRL

Dear Bill,

I love you and I miss you too much. My friend bar say you old man look same same monkey but I know you hansum man. I have problem I write you before that buffalo me sick. Now it die fall down and dead in middle of rice field. Bad fortune when it fall it fall on papa and break leg he three place. Now he not work. Brother me make stretcher bamboo he take from roof house. Roof come down and rain in house. He take papa to hospital on motorcycle. Have big accident when he come home hit police car. Police say brother me blame. Police say he pay big money. Not worry darling motorcycle OK but police car bad broken. Bad luck make Mama heart problem. Doctor say she must triple by pass. I no understand but brother me say you understand.

You know darling I only work in bar and not go with man. I wait for you come back Hua Hin but if you no help me I go with many many many many farang get pay bills money.

Old people my village say you responsible if you send money me before buy medicine sick buffalo then it not die papa no break leg house have roof brother no ride into police car mama no have heart problem.

Send me 500,000 baht for my bank. Papa fix 50,000, new roof 30,000, new police car 200,000, Mama fix 150,000. I take off 2,000 baht for sell buffalo meat but me have to pay more hospital bill for 24 people have problem eat contaminated meat 12,000 baht. I do not know money England but my brother me say me it 52.2424 mid market rate close of trading yesterday. This means you send me 10,000 your pound.

I love you darling

Noi.

Sounds like my mates new girl friend, and I'm not joking.

I am sure she will call soon too; http://www.zedge.net/ringtone/520254/

Oh George,

Thanks for such a succinct summary of the bar girl/farangs relationship. Seen it happen many times, but loved your over the top, but too true letter. Also we miss seeing you, but think of you and your properly skewed sense of humor.

Thanks

kdf and swrws

Funny story. A shame that parts of it are true many times.

what its not true, that bitch lieing to me, and her sister in the bar said she was a good girl.

that settles it, i am going to sponsor that other girl in the bar, the one with tattoos, tongue ring, age scratched of her relaminated Id card, i know i will find true love in that bar, she will be different i know

Thought your name was George, not Bill?

Sounds like the old "Spicy Girls" T-shirt from the (long closed) Spicy Girls a GoGo in Pattaya.