Second Farang In The Family

[WinnieTheKhwai]

My wife seems determined to find a Farang boyfriend for her sister for reasons that aren't very clear to me. However I wonder if that wouldn't look bad to Thais and foreigners alike. With a single Farang in the family it is merely a possibility that the girl used to be a pro, but with two Farangs married into a Thai family it's a near certainty.

Is there anyone on the forum married to a Thai lady who has a relative also married to a foreigner, and who are from a regular urban middle class family?

[maxme]

She probably hoped for ur clone to step foward. U should take that as a compliment. When some girls that were hitting on me found out that I was already taken, they asked if I had a brother or a friend that was single. Some interpret that if u are good guy then ur immediate friends and relatives must be the same. Hoping to get someone as close to u as they can.

[maxme]

you better hope and pray that that you are richer than the other guy

if he arrives and starts throwing millions around and buying houses for parents ,you will be relegated

as a stingy <deleted>

if you have two farangs in a thai family ,it will be impossible not to compare them against each other

What an optimistic assumption about two people u know nothing about.

[farang000999]

I think it is strange that your wife does not share your paranoia, mine certainly does. She does not have any sisters but there is a cousin who comes from more modest means, but financially and intellectually who appears to have a farang "boyfriend" every now and then. My wife in general is very subconscious.

[robblok]

you better hope and pray that that you are richer than the other guy

if he arrives and starts throwing millions around and buying houses for parents ,you will be relegated

as a stingy <deleted>

if you have two farangs in a thai family ,it will be impossible not to compare them against each other

I agree especially in the situation Winny described.

[DrTuner]

I guess I might loosely qualify. Not me and my wife, mind you, as she's all banook and I'm independently wealthy Hi-So (If you don't believe, you really have to see me in my best Sarong, pure Thai-Chinese silk with lotsa blingbling, that'll convince any one), but another branch of the family in Ayuthaya where most are BKK-educated and work white collar jobs. One of wifeys cousins is married to an American who used to work for Chevy in Thailand, and another to a German who's occupation is still a bit of a mystery to me.

As far as I can tell from the few funerals, etc where the whole clan is present, the two farangs hate each others guts, the family however treats them the same as anyone else. Their spouses also seem to have some sort of fewd going on, I'd guess it's "my farang is better than your farang"-contest or some such. Myself being so far out of the thai working class grid, I can pretty much blend in where I want to and find both the American and the German quite nice fellows.

Maybe it's a territorial thing, don't know and didn't bother to ask, as then I'd be forced to take sides. I'll rather let them rant a bit on whatever subject they choose, let the steam out and get down to the pleasant business of drinking beer and swapping war stories.

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[wana]

you better hope and pray that that you are richer than the other guy

if he arrives and starts throwing millions around and buying houses for parents ,you will be relegated

as a stingy <deleted>

if you have two farangs in a thai family ,it will be impossible not to compare them against each other

What an optimistic assumption about two people u know nothing about.

ive sat with thai women and they compare ,compare ,compare

(phones ,houses ,cars ,holidays ,wealthy,monthly allowance ,gifts etc

its human nature

you honestly think one family is not going to notice that they got 100k Sin Sod for their first daughter

and her younger sister lands a farang that paid 1million as if it were nothing and maybe bought them a mansion as well

ive seen it happen in villages ,even the neighbours compare the farangs their neighbours daughters bring home to check whos "getting the most "

ive seen it happen

[robblok]

you better hope and pray that that you are richer than the other guy

if he arrives and starts throwing millions around and buying houses for parents ,you will be relegated

as a stingy <deleted>

if you have two farangs in a thai family ,it will be impossible not to compare them against each other

What an optimistic assumption about two people u know nothing about.

ive sat with thai women and they compare ,compare ,compare

(phones ,houses ,cars ,holidays ,wealthy,monthly allowance ,gifts etc

its human nature

you honestly think one family is not going to notice that they got 100k Sin Sod for their first daughter

and her younger sister lands a farang that paid 1million as if it were nothing and maybe bought them a mansion as well

ive seen it happen in villages ,even the neighbours compare the farangs their neighbours daughters bring home to check whos "getting the most "

ive seen it happen

Seen it happen too.. but its human nature. Just look in the west where everyone has to keep up with the others car wise ... home wise ect.

[trainman34014]

'Match Making' by Thai's or anyone else can be a disaster waiting to happen for numerous reasons. Winnie; suppose your Mrs finds a Farang for her Sister and he turns out to be a Bum who likes knocking Women around. I'm sure the family will be very grateful that your wife brought this into being by her interference !

Both I and my Mrs get constant requests to 'fix up' women both in and outside of her family but we shrug it off and tell them to learn English and go find their own. Better you have words with your other half and explain a few pitfalls methinks.

[wana]

up in udon,its like a competition

the 15/16 year old girls cant wait to get to pattaya/bkk so they can get a farang ,get pregnant .get maried ,get him to build the biggest house in the village

and then their life goal is achieved

[Paangjang]

you better hope and pray that that you are richer than the other guy

if he arrives and starts throwing millions around and buying houses for parents ,you will be relegated

as a stingy <deleted>

if you have two farangs in a thai family ,it will be impossible not to compare them against each other

What an optimistic assumption about two people u know nothing about.

Wana is correct. Its a sad fact, but a true one. But i think you know this already.

[somtampet]

Lucky my partner has 2 hard working brothers lol,they bring the meat home,and dont ask me for anything,but i did check before living with her.

[Paangjang]

up in udon,its like a competition

the 15/16 year old girls cant wait to get to pattaya/bkk so they can get a farang ,get pregnant .get maried ,get him to build the biggest house in the village

and then their life goal is achieved

I'll just get myself up to Udon then. That way they don't need to come find me in Bkk/Patts. Do you have any pics of these girls?

[maxme]

Awaiting for the feminists to attack

[maxme]

you better hope and pray that that you are richer than the other guy

if he arrives and starts throwing millions around and buying houses for parents ,you will be relegated

as a stingy <deleted>

if you have two farangs in a thai family ,it will be impossible not to compare them against each other

What an optimistic assumption about two people u know nothing about.

Wana is correct. Its a sad fact, but a true one. But i think you know this already.

Well, if the one guy is from Germany... It's understandable.

[Travel2003]

you better hope and pray that that you are richer than the other guy

if he arrives and starts throwing millions around and buying houses for parents ,you will be relegated

as a stingy <deleted>

if you have two farangs in a thai family ,it will be impossible not to compare them against each other

I agree.

Thailand is still as many of her neighbours a "show off country".

The women love to show off how well they are married.

The men love to show off their gadgets (and gf's), indicating wealth.

[petermik]

you better hope and pray that that you are richer than the other guy

if he arrives and starts throwing millions around and buying houses for parents ,you will be relegated

as a stingy <deleted>

if you have two farangs in a thai family ,it will be impossible not to compare them against each other

What an optimistic assumption about two people u know nothing about.

It makes a LOT of sense to me

[kerryk]

you better hope and pray that that you are richer than the other guy

if he arrives and starts throwing millions around and buying houses for parents ,you will be relegated

as a stingy <deleted>

if you have two farangs in a thai family ,it will be impossible not to compare them against each other

I agree.

Thailand is still as many of her neighbours a "show off country".

The women love to show off how well they are married.

The men love to show off their gadgets (and gf's), indicating wealth.

I agree. I always carry a rolled up sock in my pocket during Song Kran.

[wamberal]

One of my wife's sisters is married to an American, they live in Houston. No sin sod from either of us, but I help the family from time to time. I can afford to, and I enjoy helping.

[buhi]

Knowing me is quite enough to put off any other members of the family having any desire for another farang !

Edited April 14, 2012 by buhi

[apetley]

I married my Thai wife 9 years ago. I met her after meeting her in a bus station where she worked pr for the tessabaan.

Her sister came to visit us in the UK about 5 years ago met and eventually married an English farmer. She used to work as a secretary at telecomasia.

The third sister is an english teacher and married to a Thai man.

One of their cousins is also married to an English man and living in UK.

Very middle class Thai family imo.

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[edwinclapham]

Personally I would be very happy to stand back and let another farang into the family. If the whole relationship is based on material assets, just by observing hopefully will give you some time for your get out clause.

You are not marrying the family, nor the friends, nor the village, I would have that irritating perpetual smile on my face knowing full well there will be only one looser and that wouldnt be me.

[Ricardo]

I agree. I always carry a rolled up sock in my pocket during Song Kran.

"Is that a jumbo-sized water-gun in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me ?!"

with apologies to Mae West ...

[WinnieTheKhwai]

I married my Thai wife 9 years ago. I met her after meeting her in a bus station where she worked pr for the tessabaan.

Her sister came to visit us in the UK about 5 years ago met and eventually married an English farmer. She used to work as a secretary at telecomasia.

The third sister is an english teacher and married to a Thai man.

One of their cousins is also married to an English man and living in UK.

Very middle class Thai family imo.

Agreed; you qualify. Good to hear.

[Travel2003]

Personally I would be very happy to stand back and let another farang into the family. If the whole relationship is based on material assets, just by observing hopefully will give you some time for your get out clause.

You are not marrying the family, nor the friends, nor the village, I would have that irritating perpetual smile on my face knowing full well there will be only one looser and that wouldnt be me.

Depending upon the family's living standard, actually, you are marrying the entire family.

This is the case with many of the SEA countries.

The highest earner in the family (including distant relatives) will often be the social welfare office.

It is expected.

[farang000999]

seems like the rural thais look at the farang inlaw as not even a human being, just an ATM.

[edwinclapham]

Personally I would be very happy to stand back and let another farang into the family. If the whole relationship is based on material assets, just by observing hopefully will give you some time for your get out clause.

You are not marrying the family, nor the friends, nor the village, I would have that irritating perpetual smile on my face knowing full well there will be only one looser and that wouldnt be me.

Depending upon the family's living standard, actually, you are marrying the entire family.

This is the case with many of the SEA countries.

The highest earner in the family (including distant relatives) will often be the social welfare office.

It is expected.

My very very exotic Thai wife and I are of the same opinion that we are not married to the family. An Issan (non hi so) family who have never expected anything from us and neither do they get it on a regular basis. This was an arrangement we made well before we married and we have stuck to the agreement.

We have young children who need educating etc and have our own expenses. They managed before I came on the scene and I dont see myself as a walking ATM.

[necronx99]

Should another farang enter the picture the result is ordained.

First you need to find a sword. Bigger the better really. You should get an older farang to teach you how to use it.

One day, if you haven't been murdered by your wifes' family for your money, you will feel an irresistible urge to meet with the other farang. You must do battle to the death. You must take his head to win.

There can be only one.

Edited April 16, 2012 by necronx99

[BigJohnnyBKK]

I'll just get myself up to Udon then. That way they don't need to come find me in Bkk/Patts.

That's actually a very sound idea, but will take a lot of time and patience. Much easier if you have locals that can vouch for your character (sic). And realize that no matter what anyone tells you (her parents, police, anyone) if she's under 18 you can find yourself in strife. But of course 95% the 18 year-olds are already either accounted for or damaged goods - but less so than in the farang areas. . .

Awaiting for the feminists to attack

Not too many of the traditional feminists hang out here I'm afraid. The sex-positive ones do enjoy hearing all the stories showing how "empowered" the Thai girls are, and some even help them scam those stupid/selfish enough to deserve it.

seems like the rural thais look at the farang inlaw as not even a human being, just an ATM.

Sadly often true. But not always.

'Match Making' by Thai's or anyone else can be a disaster waiting to happen for numerous reasons.

Yes, definitely let them find their own. If a marriage is imminent and you can tell there's something major wrong then perhaps a very discreet warning will help avert disaster, but don't take any active role in the up-front winnowing process, or god forbid actually giving referrals.

[BigJohnnyBKK]

there is a cousin who comes from more modest means, but financially and intellectually who appears to have a farang "boyfriend" every now and then. My wife in general is very subconscious.

I find this strangely hilarious, and would love to find out what it means.