Just one rule: No stealin from the net you bumbling hairy arsed bandits, so, if you feel like being profanely creative, spiel away...

Won't we get in trouble from the anal brigade ??

for some mods around here there is no creativity regarding profanity so my lips are sealed...

for some mods around here there is no creativity regarding profanity so my lips are sealed...

That's interesting tutsi cos I recently came to agree with that approach too....send me a PM if ya want to discuss it further.

And look eek is trying to get me to elaborate now....uncanny!

(No offence eek....I am sure it was purely accidental on your part)

Tad off topic, perhaps , but has anyone heard from Moonrakers recently?

profanity? nah...I just wanna hear ms eek talk dirty...whale on it, babe...

and no...moonrakers hasn't been around fer awhile...maybe he has been captured and tortured by the 'profanity police'...

now...there are 'profane gestures' and here we are, loggers in the NW woods trudging exhausted outta brush and there was Bill Hill who was working on the landing who greeted us with a penis like protuberance held to his crotch with bedroom eyes...he was the most profane guy that I ever met and as wide as he was tall and solid muscle and the most loveable guy that you'd ever want to meet (except in a bar fight where he was ferocious, I was told)...but he knew that a hale fellow well met wasn't all there was to life, however charming and profane and then I recognised: 'the agony of Bill Hill' and then thought about a suitable libretto...

The best creative profanity usually comes when your that angry you can't talk!!! you end up saying stuff like you're a "fubulacious dogfarner!!!" with venom, and everyone knows whatever a "fubulacious dogfarner" is, it's not very good, and you don't want to be one.

Load of duck in flight this thread.

(No slight intended of course)

and no...moonrakers hasn't been around fer awhile...maybe he has been captured and tortured by the 'profanity police'...

He's not lost in the corridors tutsi.....I heard him slam the door on his way out...

Good profanity, indeed the best, doesn't need to be obscene.

My favourite as a kid was "may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits".

or.... 'may your hemaroids turn into pillows so you can rest you ass'

I dunno how to spell...hemor.....hemirh....lumpy ass syndrome.

lumpy ass syndrome is far more clear than saying hemoaroiditistis.

Better than a face like a fart anyway.

For farks sake! is all I can offer.

Is 'Bloody Hell' a profanity? it's debatable in Australia...depending on the region

Whats creative about "bloody hell" Bookman? tsk tsk. Back of the class!

One of my fathers favorites, when i was upset, was saying i had a face like a smacked arse..grr..hate that one, but it is creative for sure.

My ex's favorite was saying when he saw or met someone that had been hit by the ugly stick, or, depending on the severity, severely beaten by the ugly stick.

My boyfriend mentioned an ex that he thought was attractive initially, but when her clothes came off, she had a body like play-do. He apparently developed a morbid and gross fascination of prodding her skin to see how long the indentation would last. Btw, before the farang bashers come out, she was Malay-Singaporean (or Singaporean-Malay is probably more correct). Quite a beautiful looking woman actually...but well, body like play-doh. Men..what a superficial bunch!

Cant think of any creative insults..umm.. later.

Whats creative about "bloody hell" Bookman? tsk tsk. Back of the class!

One of my fathers favorites, when i was upset, was saying i had a face like a smacked arse..grr..hate that one, but it is creative for sure.

My ex's favorite was saying when he saw or met someone that had been hit by the ugly stick, or, depending on the severity, severely beaten by the ugly stick.

My boyfriend mentioned an ex that he thought was attractive initially, but when her clothes came off, she had a body like play-do. He apparently developed a morbid and gross fascination of prodding her skin to see how long the indentation would last. Btw, before the farang bashers come out, she was Malay-Singaporean (or Singaporean-Malay is probably more correct). Quite a beautiful looking woman actually...but well, body like play-doh. Men..what a superficial bunch!

Cant think of any creative insults..umm.. later.

creative insults? I thought this thread was about creative profanity and I'm waitin' to hear you talk dirty...and I know of the 'play dough' arrangement with malay women (in Indonesia in my case) and you can 'play' with their contours for hours...and then there is the intoxicating musky scent of their lovely brown skin...ooooh...

and here's tutsi in his favorite brothel in Jakarta with his favorite girls and then: 'hey! you know what I like...get under that shower and get rid of that cheap perfume!' and then the girl would say: 'the stinkin' perfume ain't cheap, tutsi and I expect a replacement bottle from you next time...I got other customers y'know...'

oooh...the casual familiarity was so nice prior to 'play dough' time...

The turd burglars should be along soon...they have acidic tongues.

Its my thread tuts and i can change profanities to insults any time i so wish you crud of an elephants purtubus and dont you be forgetting it. As for my ex's sing-malay play-do princess, that cannot be even closely compared to your stinkin rat riddled paybythehourhalfhour horses douvers. Not that i have any investing interest in Ms X Play-doh, just that a rather rich, multi-linguistic, surgically enhanced lady, albeit a play-doh one, deserves some distinction from the common grass grazers.

Im dusting myself down and awaiting the turd burglars. Not even a full page thread yet, and already we need someone in to clean up our shit.

I think the shirt lifters may object to being called turd burglars.

Whats creative about "bloody hell" Bookman? tsk tsk. Back of the class!

One of my fathers favorites, when i was upset, was saying i had a face like a smacked arse..grr..hate that one, but it is creative for sure.

My ex's favorite was saying when he saw or met someone that had been hit by the ugly stick, or, depending on the severity, severely beaten by the ugly stick.

My boyfriend mentioned an ex that he thought was attractive initially, but when her clothes came off, she had a body like play-do. He apparently developed a morbid and gross fascination of prodding her skin to see how long the indentation would last. Btw, before the farang bashers come out, she was Malay-Singaporean (or Singaporean-Malay is probably more correct). Quite a beautiful looking woman actually...but well, body like play-doh. Men..what a superficial bunch!

Cant think of any creative insults..umm.. later.

Sorry , you did say creative, which may limit my involvement at this stage...ill see if there is anything in the deep deep unused recesses of my brain...it may take a while

Weiner muncher?

Bookman, you are really cute. No creative profanities in this post..im too cuted out by your attempt at creative profanity. ^.^

Bookman, you are really cute. No creative profanities in this post..im too cuted out by your attempt at creative profanity. ^.^

At birth I really did miss the creative gene...Singing, Music, Art, profanities, though I appreciate it all, I have no ability to create.

Its my thread tuts and i can change profanities to insults any time i so wish you crud of an elephants purtubus and dont you be forgetting it. As for my ex's sing-malay play-do princess, that cannot be even closely compared to your stinkin rat riddled paybythehourhalfhour horses douvers. Not that i have any investing interest in Ms X Play-doh, just that a rather rich, multi-linguistic, surgically enhanced lady, albeit a play-doh one, deserves some distinction from the common grass grazers.

Im dusting myself down and awaiting the turd burglars. Not even a full page thread yet, and already we need someone in to clean up our shit.

ms eek...when I said 'talk dirty' I expected something better than that...but scatalogical inferences are clinically unclean, I haveta admit...

I think the shirt lifters may object to being called turd burglars.

We fudge packers do indeed object to being called turd burglars

Sorry, I meant pillow biters....

Sorry, I meant pillow biters....

and here's tutsi reclining naked with the 5'11' girlfriend: 'if you don't watch out I'm gonna bite yer pillow...' and then she says with bedroom eyes as she spreads her magnificent legs to reveal the unshaved treasure therein: 'here's sumpin' else ye can bite, ye pretentious bastid...'

then tutsi quietly mutters: 'arrrgh...' and then she mimics: ''arrrgh'? I'll give you arrrgh, ye bastid...gimme yer wiener...'

and then when the session is over she towers over a depleted tutsiwarrrior in triumph and sez: 'don't ever think yer bad, punk...no one ever bites my pillow...'

Sorry, I meant pillow biters....

and here's tutsi reclining naked with the 5'11' girlfriend: 'if you don't watch out I'm gonna bite yer pillow...' and then she says with bedroom eyes as she spreads her magnificent legs to reveal the unshaved treasure therein: 'here's sumpin' else ye can bite, ye pretentious bastid...'

Ever thought about writing for Mills & Boon tuts?

Sorry, I meant pillow biters....

and here's tutsi reclining naked with the 5'11' girlfriend: 'if you don't watch out I'm gonna bite yer pillow...' and then she says with bedroom eyes as she spreads her magnificent legs to reveal the unshaved treasure therein: 'here's sumpin' else ye can bite, ye pretentious bastid...'

Ever thought about writing for Mills & Boon tuts?

nah...I'm gonna start me own publishing business; you can do it on the internet now, ye know...I'm gettin' too old to be workin' in the desert in saudi anymore...but I sure will miss them falafel sandwiches...

'as the tahina sauce dripped slowly over Fatimah's splendidly flat and quivering belly...'

Careful tutsi I'm tryin' to finish a chicken and hummus kebab here....

Lately the term twunt has been in the back of my mind...but I would like to send the lovely chap a Raspberry Tart instead.