Poll: Men -- Are You Comfortable Sharing A Slice Of Cake With Another Man In A Restaurant?

[Jingthing]

Inspired by an interview with David Sedaris on the Daily Show.

Sedaris was discussing how he was interviewing men about the idea of sharing a slice of cake at a restaurant. Basically the straight men wouldn't do it, but might be OK sharing a plate of Buffalo Chicken Wings. The gay men were OK with sharing the slice of cake. Some straight men might share the cake but would tell the waitperson: we're not gay!

I think there is truth to the observation at least in the USA. When I have shared a slice of cake with another man in the USA I definitely get the feeling everyone in the restaurant assumes we're gay.

One detail about the poll. I no longer really eat cake for dietary reasons. If you also don't eat cake, please vote what you would do IF you would eat cake. That's what I did.

Another important detail:

One slice.

One plate.

Two forks!

Edited May 10, 2013 by Jingthing

[thaicbr]

So your saying there is one plate, with one slice of cake and two utensils (fork/spoon) or just one utensil?

I gotta say I'm REALLY bad at sharing cake with ANYONE. MY CAKE

Sent from my i-mobile i-STYLE Q6

[Jingthing]

So your saying there is one plate, with one slice of cake and two utensils (fork/spoon) or just one utensil?

I gotta say I'm REALLY bad at sharing cake with ANYONE. MY CAKE

Sent from my i-mobile i-STYLE Q6

You're not alone.

It is funny. This makes sense to me. I can see most straight men being OK with sharing something macho like chicken wings or ribs, but a pretty piece of cake ... UH OH!

But silly, yes?

Another non-sharer:

I'm going to Thai-ify this a bit.

I am certain in the USA two men sharing a slice of cake on a plate will be assumed to be gay.

But what about England?

France?

How about THAILAND, say two Thai men?

Edited May 10, 2013 by Jingthing

[FDog]

Sharing cake? No problem.

But never sharing cake with a guy using the same spoon/fork.

[Jingthing]

Sharing cake? No problem.

But never sharing cake with a guy using the same spoon/fork.

One slice.

One plate.

Two forks!

[stoneyboy]

You can have your cake and eat it too.

Bob Dylan

[Songhua]

Ever see the Friends episode where Joey's date keeps picking from his plate. He sits there stewing but finally can't take it anymore and screams, 'Joey doesn't share food!'. That's me.

[smokie36]

I saw two guys share a pie in a pub yesterday.

Half each and two plates however.

Cake is a no no for me though....one slice each please.

My gf can share though!

[smokie36]

In fact...I'm not sure I would order a dessert dish if I was eating with another male friend.

Maybe cheese n crackers?

[mad mary]

Does the guy I'd be sharing the cake with want to bum me?

If no, I wouldn't have a problem sharing the cake.

[SteeleJoe]

Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

No, I won't "share a cake" with a guy - not that there's anything wrong with it. Some of my best friends share cakes with guys.

[SteeleJoe]

But seriously folks...I just read the thread more carefully and was surprised to discover there is actually a semi-

legitimate question here and not just a joke. So I'll answer: I'm not a huge fan of cake but if the was an especially good one and a only one piece on a plate to share with another guy - why not?

We don't have to link arms and then mash the cake into each other's face, do we? And we are fully clothed? Or at least partly?

[uptheos]

Ok what's the real question JT? Is the cake really a 'red herring?'

Or are you getting at the fact that there might be saliva on the other persons fork, which then enters the cake, so you're trying to sort out the homophobes?

Chicken wings or ribs can be ate with fingers.

But just for the record, there's only one person who can put their utensils into anything I'm eating.

Edited May 10, 2013 by uptheos

[Thaddeus]

Sharing cake? No problem.

But never sharing cake with a guy using the same spoon/fork.

One slice.

One plate.

Two forks!

Not really a great fan of cake, two forks or not is irrelevant, and about what I would give, one forker at the table is enough.

[jambco984]

Thais share savoury dishes whilst drinking or socialising and sometimes there is only 1 spoon per bowl so sharing for a Thai isnt a problem men and women (I could be wrong though).

Me personally why not.

2 forks and 1 plate sure, not to be mistaken with 2 girls and a cup.

[overherebc]

I'm confused, what are you trying to justify? You're gay, is that word still politically correct or what?.

Just sat in a restaurant tonight with four friends and wives, everyone had something different on their plates and a few times we said Hey, try this, it's really good, friend or friends wife would take a forkfull and say that's really good, I'll have that next time we come here.

Why are you trying to justify your lifestyle ?

Live your life.

You're a long time dead.

[Jingthing]

I'm confused, what are you trying to justify?

...

Nothing. It is what it is. Read the OP.

[Jingthing]

...

Is the cake really a 'red herring?'

...

Fishcakes don't count!

No it's not about sharing saliva.

I think it's more about how cake is viewed as more of a feminine food. It's all decorated and it's not a hunk of meat.

Maybe it's also somewhat ordering cake is more of a going out on a date kind of thing.

Perhaps another reason is many people might think gay men would be more interested in not eating all the calories in an entire portion of cake, but then why order cake at all?

I reckon there is less sharing of cake slices in THAILAND because have you noticed how TINY the slices of cake are here?

In the USA, the slices are sometimes HUGE.

I don't know know why when people see two men share a slice a cake at least in my home country, they are assumed to be gay, but they just are! I think that's funny.

I did not mean to imply there is anything wrong with feeling uncomfortable sharing a slice of cake with another man because it makes you look gay. But I still think it's funny.

Edited May 10, 2013 by Jingthing

[KhunNene]

I have seen many males around the world sharing a single piece of cake in just one plate, but sometimes they used each a spoon to enjoy the treat. And many more times I have seen two different kinds of cake slices in just one plate! Neve I thought that using a fork could be understood as gay!

[thaicbr]

...

Is the cake really a 'red herring?'

...

Fishcakes don't count!

 

No it's not about sharing saliva.

I think it's more about how cake is viewed as more of a feminine food. It's all decorated and it's not a hunk of meat. 

Maybe it's also somewhat ordering cake is more of a going out on a date kind of thing. 

Perhaps another reason is many people might think gay men would be more interested in not eating all the calories in an entire portion of cake, but then why order cake at all?

I reckon there is less sharing of cake slices in THAILAND because have you noticed how TINY the slices of cake are here?

In the USA, the slices are sometimes HUGE.

I don't know know why when people see two men share a slice a cake at least in my home country, they are assumed to be gay, but they just are! I think that's funny. 

 

I did not mean to imply there is anything wrong with feeling uncomfortable sharing a slice of cake with another man because it makes you look gay. But I still think it's funny.

Ahhh OK. IF the cake slice was HUGE then I would have no problem sharing with a mate (with 2 forks)

Sent from my i-mobile i-STYLE Q6

[Jingthing]

I have seen many males around the world sharing a single piece of cake in just one plate, but sometimes they used each a spoon to enjoy the treat. And many more times I have seen two different kinds of cake slices in just one plate! Neve I thought that using a fork could be understood as gay!

Fork OR Spoon. Picky picky.

Actually, I think the same question could apply to most ANY festive dessert. Pies, ice cream sundaes, etc.

Obviously sharing a milkshake is another level ...

Edited May 10, 2013 by Jingthing

[candypants]

I prefer Pie

[sustento]

I prefer Pie

[eeeya]

I'm pretty sure the choice of cutlery has a 2nd meaning indicating your preference for how you like your gayness

[krisb]

No. Get your own damn cake!

[krisb]

So it's ok for me to answer this JT, but you don't care if I prefer my peanut butter crunchy or smooth..

[Jingthing]

So it's ok for me to answer this JT, but you don't care if I prefer my peanut butter crunchy or smooth..

Crunchy, innit?

People from other countries than the USA, do you think two men together sharing a slice of cake would NOT be assumed to be gay in your home countries? I am sure about what most people think in the USA.

Edited May 11, 2013 by Jingthing

[AnotherOneAmerican]

cake, hopefully not the sweet rubbish served in Thailand.

peanut butter, smooth.

I would think the two guys too mean to buy two pieces of cake, not they were gay.

Edited May 11, 2013 by AnotherOneAmerican

[Jingthing]

cake, hopefully not the sweet rubbish served in Thailand.

peanut butter, smooth.

I would think the two guys too mean to buy two pieces of cake, not they were gay.

David Sedaris did an extensive informal survey about this in the USA. Almost all of straight men would NOT share the cake for one reason: thought to be gay. The gay men would. I think also super closeted gay men also would not. I reckon many straight men in the USA would also like to save both the money AND calories to share one slice of cake, but again, not worth it for their sexuality image.

Edited May 11, 2013 by Jingthing

[AnotherOneAmerican]

cake, hopefully not the sweet rubbish served in Thailand.

peanut butter, smooth.

I would think the two guys too mean to buy two pieces of cake, not they were gay.

David Sedaris did an extensive informal survey about this in the USA. Almost all of straight men would NOT share the cake for one reason: thought to be gay. The gay men would. I think also super closeted gay men also would not.

That's me with Tom Cruise and John Travolta then.

http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/155131/john-travolta-feels-safe-in-the-closet

Edited May 11, 2013 by AnotherOneAmerican