Ex Thai girlfriend reporting me to Embassy

[thefarrang]

Hello,

I would really like to hear anyone who has any information or experience of my situation please.

I have a child with an ex Thai girlfriend, who says she will now report me to my embassy and cause big problems for me.

She is from a proof background and has very limited money.

I have been supporting her every month for sometime, more recently I have reduced the amount of money I am paying as I now view it as only

supporting my child, no reason to provide for her famly etc.....

Does anyone else support a child with an ex Thai girlfriend, if so how much do you allow per month?

We have had many arguements, etc... together and she says she will report me to my Embassy in Bangkok and this will cause be big big problems!

I think she means that I can get blacklisted from visiting Thailand and prosecuted through the police/courts to pay more money?

I should add I am not named on childs birth certificate at present.

Can someone advise what trouble can she make for me ? Can I be blacklisted from Thailand, will the police arrest me ?

I add I am happy to continue to pay a reasonable amount for child support.

[ukrules]

Your Embassy can't and won't do anything apart from maybe tell her to get out of the building.

Edited November 26, 2013 by ukrules

[bobo42]

I don't see how you could be blacklisted from Thailand, and I highly doubt the Thai police would be interested, what would the charge even be? On the other hand, if your home country has strict child-support laws, then she could conceivably create problems for you back home, though I imagine that would be incredibly difficult and expensive for her to pursue. I really doubt that anything can come of this, particularly without hard proof of your paternity.

[rgs2001uk]

Can someone advise what trouble can she make for me ? Can I be blacklisted from Thailand, will the police arrest me ?

She cant make any trouble.

How could you be blacklisted?

No the police will not arrest you.

We have had many arguements, etc... together and she says she will report me to my Embassy in Bangkok and this will cause be big big problems!

Usual BS and bluster, tell her to go ahead, no it will not cause big problems.

if so how much do you allow per month?

Well the answer is as much as you think you can afford, providing she and her family aint taking the piss.

10k - 15 k is plenty, and probably way more than needed, dont know the age of the child.

I think she means that I can get blacklisted from visiting Thailand and prosecuted through the police/courts to pay more money?

Ohh nice one, talk about shooting herself in the foot, if you are blacklisted how the heck would you be able to visit the country and be prosecuted through the courts?

Tell her you will send X per month, end of, no more discussions, tell her if she makes any more threats or gives you any more hassle, X will soon become zero.

[meechai]

I should add I am not named on child's birth certificate at present.

DNA test may be nice to have in either case

The rest of your embassy worries as others have already said no worries.

Edited November 26, 2013 by meechai

[i claudius]

How long was she your girlfriend ,did you live here with her and are you certain the child is yours ? legaly she can do nothing ,.

[jackr]

Bit of bannork bs by the sounds. Firstly and lastly she needs to speak with a lawyer (if she knows what one looks like) and go through the courts, the police (and certainly embassy, <deleted>) won't do a thing. One typically gets blacklisted for overstaying like 30 years, drugs crimes, working without permit, etc, not because some doris thinks she's owed more money.

[harrry]

Ex girlfriend has no rights to money or property.

Wives have no rights for money payments but do have right to a share of property.

Children if named on the birth certificate and ratified by the court as yours have right to maintainance....about 2000baht a month and shared school fees.

[NancyL]

A woman can name any man as a child's father on the birth certificate in Thailand -- it doesn't mean anything. A DNA test and court order means something. I doubt she'll even get an appointment at your embassy to talk about the misdeeds of one of their lads, much less 10 minutes of someone's time to talk with them. The embassies don't blacklist people -- Thai Immigration does that.

Instead, you should seriously think about getting a vasectomy so you can continue to have fun with new ladies without worrying about what will follow. The only loser in all this is your poor child -- you can't even tell us if it's a little boy or girl. Please don't subject another child to this.

[thefarrang]

How long was she your girlfriend ,did you live here with her and are you certain the child is yours ? legaly she can do nothing ,.

She was my girlfriend ( well gik really) for about 1 year.

We never lived together. Never had a DNA test, but from appearances Im certain the child is mine.

[dom samui]

Listen to mama !

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[transam]

Listen to mama !

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Go on then, say something....................

[MrHammer]

How long was she your girlfriend ,did you live here with her and are you certain the child is yours ? legaly she can do nothing ,.

She was my girlfriend ( well gik really) for about 1 year.

We never lived together. Never had a DNA test, but from appearances Im certain the child is mine.

How old is the child? It could very well be your child or another farang child and she's playing two or more of you with the same. Of course, this is pure speculation, but not all that unlikely considering she is already threathening you and lying about what rights she has.

So really, nothing to do but give a 'fair' amount if you feel generous or insist on a DNA test if you want to be sure.

Remember that she will likely keep this up for 18 years, so maybe you really should get a test and if the child is really yours, perhaps consider how you can keep cordial with the mother of your child. I don't believe it is good for children to grow up in households where one parent resents the other.

In any case, your choice, but DNA testing is the only way to know.

[Munger]

"she is from a PROOF background" <deleted> is a proof background?

[benalibina]

"she is from a PROOF background" <deleted> is a proof background?

Guesstimation only. A woman who comes from a rural background where there are not many jobopportunities and who has decided to make money by putting her divine body at the disposal of others for a small fee.

[Bender]

she is certainly did watch an american movie, and found that as your ex gf she is entitled for life to a pension,

and your house in malibu so that why she want to get an appointment with the ambassador...

[Habs]

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[Andre0720]

A similar question was asked in the Phuket Gazette some years ago.

A woman lawyer answered, and finished by writing:

''And remember, it is the woman's responsibility to take care of the child''.

And when someone in Thailand says, ''You will have big problem'', just a fear tactic.

If you volunteer 10,000 bahts a month, for your child, you are a man of good heart...

[GBK]

She won't get shit. As others have already said she has two hopes and one's called Bob.

I was with a girl for 15 years, had a son, I brought up her daughter, she left and went to a European country and I started getting letters from that country's social security office. I now pay B10k a month to my son, but only because I want to. They can't touch you, won't be interested and have bigger fish to fry.

Give her a <deleted> off tablet and be done with it.

[ezzra]

If she wasn't a minor or under age when you first got to know her intimately

than she go and jump in in lake.....

[Mario2008]

Moved to children and family forum.

[farang000999]

lots of angry men here i see, poor child.

[mca]

Bit of bannork bs by the sounds. Firstly and lastly she needs to speak with a lawyer (if she knows what one looks like)

Strong but true.

Like the current thread running about somebody wanting 20000 baht for a dead soi dog with the local opportunists it's a case of look at the dollar signs first and let the who's why's and wherefore's come later.

Me and my wife were sitting outside KK bus station once waiting to pick our niece up. I started the engine just as an old bloke in a tuk tuk jerked forward and hit the back of the car cracking the taillight. We hopped out and, upon spotting yours truly, he engaged his few brain cells, thought " Here's a farang mug" and said that I'd reversed into him and wanted 5000 baht.

My wife told him ( rough translation) " Uncle we were going to be good hearted and let you off cracking our light but if you want to do it that way you can pay for the light.'

He grumbled a bit and cleared off.

A lot of these situations they'll try and bluff you to see who blinks first.

[timtscott]

I guess it depends on your level of commitment to this child. The mom may be a scammer but at the end of the day it does cost money to raise a child and do you want a child of yours raised in squalor in a third world country?

I would want a D N A test complete before paying one penny. But if you are the father, don't you want to provide him/her with more than the basics?

She is blowing smoke about her legal options but you still have to live with your conscious if you walk away entirely.

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

[Mario2008]

You have not legitimised the child, so curently you are legally not the father of the child. The child (or the mother on behalf of the child) can not lay any claim on you untill they first file a paternity suit against you and the court determines that you are indeed the father.

A typical Thai judge will award child support between 3,000 and 6,000 baht a month, plus you both share the medical and educational cost.

That is the legal part. You don't deny being the father so you should take care of the child and in an amount that you can afford. The child is afterall also your responsibility, so you should take good care of it. Not only to the limits of the law.

There is no money to be paid for your ex-GF herself. But do take into consideration that taking care of a small child makes it more difficult for her to find a good paying job.

[slipperylobster]

Do not do what I did. Hardly ever got to see my son, although I paid monthly. At first, I was giving too much money (20,000). That is more than a teacher with a college education makes. 9000 seems to be a good honest figure. You are not responsible for the mom, or any other kid...only morally responsible for your own. I assume she would live in a home with or without your child, you are not responsible for her rent.

Medical Insurance per month.....1000 (I don't really know)

Food per month...........................4000 per month

Clothing.........................................1000 (damn good wardrobe after a year..but they grow fast)

Education (eventually)..................2000 (not a private school of course up to you)

College fund.................................1000 per month for 18 years would pay most college fees (keep that away from her)

I might have missed something.....from time to time gifts, dentists etc.

There seems to be gossip going around that foreign embassies force give free money to farang babies....not true.

She might figure out a way to turn you in on a fraud hotline for getting tax breaks and/or extra social security money which could get you audited. She could do this through a friend who is Thai, but has citizenship in your country. In the USA there is a fraud hotline. For example...if you claim (USA) the child is living with you when that is not the case....

That is probably not going to happen. They will not want to get involved here.

[fvw53]

- no embassy has legal powers to intervene in your case : only the Thai courts can make a final decision if necessary

- if a Thai court makes a final ruling (no more appeal possible) that you neglect your child - having your nationality - then your embassy may consider to inform justice system in your own country.

[bitcoinbob]

there is no alimony or child support in thailand , she can get nothing. if she could 75% of all thai men would be in jail for not paying child support or alimony. tell her what alimony and and child support is in thai GO GET A FARANG.

[chappie1207]

Ask her to take you to court, they will make you pay 20% of your salary; so if you earn 50k a month you will need to pay 10,000 a month... No need to worry if she goes to police or any other official, nothing they can do... I pay 15,000 to my ex, not the result of a court ruling but my own doing, it is for my son and I don't want him to want for anything...

[Mario2008]

Actually a teacher with a college degree starts at around 15,000 baht a month (if a master degree I beleife 17,500 baht a month and that grows steadily. Many a Thai government teacher I know earns at least 30,000 baht a month with up to 50,000 or even more if older.

Besides that they can submit workplans, including research and such, to get an extra bonus a month of something like 10,000 baht.

But all that is off topic.